# Forgetting DP but not out yet?



## FirstAid (Nov 19, 2018)

So here I am.

Sort of got the point where I am just getting on with my day, not checking symptoms or trying to get back to how I used to be because its like I've forgotten them, like my field of view used to be different but now I can't remember what it was like.

Anxiety has switched off, lowering the anxiety actually gave me a way of grounding myself and feeling connected somewhat,now I can't do that.

Can't focus, vision is clear but can't get engrossed, etc.

No identity, or sense of self or recognition of consciousness.

No emotions whatsoever, wants, drive. Feels like they have dissappeared

Head feels empty

Stranger to self

So just wondering where I go from this point? Carrying on in this empty state where I don't even feel dpd yet I know I am.

I know my symptoms and how I was before but can't seem to feel it if that makes sense.

I feel like I have submitted and just let it go but wondering if it's the right thing to do, don't want this current state to become normal,want my feelings back etc.

Anyone know how i should proceed or if this is the right path?

Ta


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## Chris90 (Aug 1, 2018)

I’m a little bit past where you are. Once my anxiety levels dropped for about a month, I could visually focus better, regained my internal dialogue to an extent, have more drive, feel somewhat more connected to my emotions, etc. Are you on any type of drugs? SSRI’s can make you feel very numb and zombie-like. So long as you’re doing the things commonly recommended in the recovery section, such as eating and sleeping well, taking vitamins, engaging in hobbies and with people, exercising daily, and not constantly monitoring your symptoms, you’re on the right path, and all of the bothersome symptoms will very slowly fade away. Try to look at progress in increments of 1 month at a time. One of my biggest frustrations has been how long it’s taking to recover(just hit 6 months), but if I look back in terms of a month or so, I recognize progress.


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## FirstAid (Nov 19, 2018)

Chris90 said:


> I'm a little bit past where you are. Once my anxiety levels dropped for about a month, I could visually focus better, regained my internal dialogue to an extent, have more drive, feel somewhat more connected to my emotions, etc. Are you on any type of drugs? SSRI's can make you feel very numb and zombie-like. So long as you're doing the things commonly recommended in the recovery section, such as eating and sleeping well, taking vitamins, engaging in hobbies and with people, exercising daily, and not constantly monitoring your symptoms, you're on the right path, and all of the bothersome symptoms will very slowly fade away. Try to look at progress in increments of 1 month at a time. One of my biggest frustrations has been how long it's taking to recover(just hit 6 months), but if I look back in terms of a month or so, I recognize progress.


Well its like its switched off along with my emotions, basically in October I got a baby assessment to decide what i should do next, was told I may have psychosis after explaining symptoms,(was confirmed a week later that I don't) at that point I sort of let go and gave up, let my anxiety do what it wanted and stopped fighting to ground myself, since then I forgot what my perception was like and identity completely etc, emotions and drives completely disconnected rather than being numb,I don't have a sense of being grounded but I'm not dreamy or anything, more like In a void of nothingness.

Just kicking myself for letting go and stopping fighting as I feel that was a wrong thing to do, feel as If I have fallen too far and can't get back to where I was.

Going to keeo trying anyway, I want my life back, I deserve to live and be myself again, not only that but better as dp has shown me how stupid I have been and that anxiety has consumed my life so far.

Not on any medication tbh, was kind if thinking I should of initially but decided against it.

Best of luck to you.


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