# I feel like half a person



## Riah (Feb 17, 2014)

Like Sam from Quantum Leap

Or John Malkovich, from, well, Being John Malkovich.

I feel like half a person is in my body. Not a whole person; never a whole person.

Anyone else understand? :/


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## Riah (Feb 17, 2014)

If I were to explain it better; I feel like a fragment of a personality.

I feel like the image of my old, whole Self was reflected into a pond, and now all I have left is the rippling, cloudy reflection of my Self to live with. And what's worse, I feel like that crude reflection of my Self is in a foreign body, and trying relentlessly to make sense of the observable world.

All is distant to me; and I am distant to myself.


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

Agreed i feel the same


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## salmon (Jul 28, 2014)

That's almost a perfect description of how it feels - being only half a person. You'll do something but without experiencing it, because you're there to do it, but not feel it or experience it whole. Pretty much like the personality fragment you are is observing, as another completely alien-feeling person is experiencing the rest.


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## Riah (Feb 17, 2014)

salmon said:


> That's almost a perfect description of how it feels - being only half a person. You'll do something but without experiencing it, because you're there to do it, but not feel it or experience it whole. Pretty much like the personality fragment you are is observing, as another completely alien-feeling person is experiencing the rest.


Yes yes yes yes yes EXACTLY.


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## salmon (Jul 28, 2014)

Do you have any advice for when that feeling comes on? It's a difficult one to pass 8(


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## Riah (Feb 17, 2014)

salmon said:


> Do you have any advice for when that feeling comes on? It's a difficult one to pass 8(


It is a very difficult one to pass. But today I feel better. I have been trying to "dumb myself down" so to speak; just watching mindless tv, and not delving into anything too mentally stimulating. I've accepted that life takes care of itself, and DP will go away on its own.

I've also tried to re-associate myself with previous memories, and "pray" before I go bed to avoid anxious thoughts and hyper-awareness (I just say what I'm thankful for, mull over positive memories, and think about what I have to look forward to)


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## salmon (Jul 28, 2014)

That's good advice about the praying, haha. I have done similar 

Dumbing yourself down I have also done oh man, it is a hard one. It makes me feel mindless. I've decided to express emotion a lot more, because I somehow feel that could be relative to feeling my DP. If you have someone close enough to you, like a boyfriend/girlfriend/etc, human touch really helps me come back to reality. Just something as simple as holding a hand when talking to someone brings you back immediately if you're feeling that your mind's wandering away from you.

Even better, just simply ignoring the feeling like it's an annoying child works really well. It's super hard to do, but when you've had it for so long you just sort of end up treating it like an annoying child. It depends though, I do feel that mine has calmed down a lot so I am able to ignore it at times, but then again that's not possible for everyone.

I hope for you the best.


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## MiketheAlien (Nov 7, 2013)

I feel this way as well. :S


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