# Honestly...



## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

I'm going too be a vegetable for years right? Too many stories of people having DR for years, seeing these posts are horror stories to me. I hardly see anyone recovering after months. I'm going to be stuck in hell just as long as other people.

I NEED
ANSWERS.

I cannot fucking function.

I keep getting worse.

CAN YOU RECOVER FROM VERY VERY VERY SEVERE DR?????????

HOW BAD HAS IT BEEN FOR OTHERS AND DID YOU GET BETTER?

POSITIVE REPLIES PLEASE.

Please help me.

I NEED HOPE.


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Melissa, my DR was so bad in the beginning that I ran over the parking place in complete loss. I did not know where I was or how to get to the toilets. It was so obvious that my father laughed about me (he did not know what was wrong with me to that point). I was afraid to drive the car. I had to take my boyfriend's hand when going through the city. When I entered my parent's flat I had forgotten how I got there. I was so afraid at one point that I was afraid to throw up when I just woke up.

Things will get better, I promise that!

Do you still see a therapist?


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

Yes I do but I barely leave the house now.:/


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

What does she do with you?

What does she say?

Believe me, I was at a point where I almost vomited when I opened the house door. It will get better


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

Did you or does anybody feel like they couldn't get around their room? Like you just felt like yiour head was completely numb and you didn't know where you were or what you were doing?


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Yeah.

Melissa, maybe it would be more beneficial to focus on what your therapist says than focussing on how you feel? I am sure she is convinced you are going to be fine


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## Fluke93 (Nov 2, 2010)

I got out of a bad spell when i went to CBT, a pych, and basically realised that it couldn't hurt me. I tried to go onto this forum for relief but every time i read that someone has had this for years i used to just get overwhelmed with dread, i felt useless. Everywhere looked weird, i thought i was certainly insane. Nothing could give me relief, this was more than just anxiety. My worse fear was being like this for years or worse ever. But for me the first couple of steps to feeling relief were...Accepting that i have this condition and it was nothing else, and not fearing it, which took weeks but eventually i got there. Each day the feeling of dread, the feeling of sadness overwhelmed me, my parents were angry with me at first, but i tried not to get angry back, i mean if i was at a normal state of mind and never new about DP i would probably get angry at the person too. I'm pleased to say im doing much better these days though, i don't experience DP anymore, i experience DR. I don't feel like im in a dream anymore as such, i feel like im in a bubble, and its frustrating that i cant experience the countryside and beautiful sceneries anymore.

Its almost like my mind no longer convinces me im not real, the worlds not real etc, but i experience DP but i know i shouldn't. Its like 50% of me is in looking out, and 50% of me is looking out looking in. So i have recovered a LOT from where i was, and seriously even though the world looks strange for me still, its lessened so much in intensity. The only symptoms that disturbs me still is the feeling of being a different person than i once was. But even that has come back a little...Maybe a few more months and then ill be closer than ever before? Or maybe a year or two who knows but i have been definitely getting glimpses of reality. Just hang in there, relief will come i am dead sure of that. And as for people not recovering in months, well your right. A lot of people it takes much longer than months, but then ive read stories of people overcoming this after weeks. So seriously just because others it takes 6 or 7 years to recover does not mean it will for you.

If you're anxious work on the anxiety, if you're depressed work on that. And then from there you should progress. Hang in there Melissa


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Great to hear that Fluke









I am starting CBT next Thursday and I hope it will help me, too!


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## Fluke93 (Nov 2, 2010)

Gypsy85 said:


> Great to hear that Fluke
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Yeah the first CBT lady i went to was brilliant. She told me techniques to help with this feeling, and to help the panic attacks. After three sessions i felt a lot better. I then went back and had a man and he was not very good at all. After that i stopped. But i think most of them are good. Its good that youre going to CBT though, its a good option IMO. Good luck Gypsy


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Thank you very much, Fluke









I am so confused about my state of being... A professional telling me that this is REALLY just anxiety and DP would help me tremendously


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## gill (Jul 1, 2010)

Maybe try some n-acetylcysteine. I take it everyday and it helps to clear the fog.


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

Anyone else?


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Once again: What does your therapist tell you? How does she work with you?


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

Thhey aren't any help at all. Nothing has helped. I feel hopeless.







I keep getting worse.


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Please tell me what she has told you exactly!

Are you diagnosed with anxiety disorder? Stress???


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## theoneandonly (Nov 17, 2010)

i don't know if this will help bring you comfort, but there are people doing research on DP every day. scienceguy has been doing research with other people at his university and it seems like every day they're getting closer to understanding it. he hasn't posted here in a while, but that might be because he is doing a trial on himself since no one else wanted to participate.

keep your head up because there is hope!!


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## thatfatguy (Dec 26, 2010)

I recovered from both DP and DR in less than 2 months. My cause was stressed induced. My therapist and I both believed medication was not necessary right away. We both agreed that I would give it a month or two of just seeing if it would go away naturally on its own. It was very difficult and it took a while to get my anxiety attacks under control, but I managed somehow. Therapy consisted of just talking about what lead up to my DP/DR and how to resolve those issues from persisting and ways to prevent this from happening again. That helped me from digging a hole deeper into my condition and allowed room for healing. The only "treatment" she gave me was to breathe when having a panic attack, try not to think about things that make me scared or anxious, and to run to relieve excess stress. Other than that I was on my own. But i've only been to 4 sessions, one every week, so i'll have to talk to her again Friday to see where we will continue if need be.


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

That makes sense TFG, mine was stress induced too but I decided to take meds because I didn't know any better I guess. I regret that so much. I think the meds messed up my healing and made me worse. I do feel that if I didn't take any meds, my mind would just heal in its own, it's too late now, I wish I could start all over again.









And Gyspy, my psychiatrist didn't know anything about DR, I even saw a second one and he didn't help much either. You know how it goes, they ask you questions, nod their head, and send you on your way with stupid meds. I sadly haven't had that much help from any of them. I just wish I wasn't to dumb enough to start meds. I may of been feeling much beter by now...and this was seven months ago.


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

I honestly think that this is the wrong place to be asking if you will recover. Because all but like 2 of the people who post here regularly have dp and dr and are asking the same question. Everyone else who has recovered has left this site and are out living life. It's like I figured that based on the number overall members and the number of people who post regularly at this time, 98.75% of people recover from dp. I've seen people have it for a month and people have it for 4 years and they do recover. Dp/dr has a function to serve in our lives and when it's function is over, it goes away. Honestly, like way less than 1% of the people who have dp/dr have it long term. It's an incredibly tiny amount and those are usually from laced drugs, brain damage, or severe trauma or abuse. You got dp because of stress. So really, there is not a good reason for your brain to hang on it for long.

I agree that your medication is probably making it worse. I went the medication route and went through hell with all of the side effects the drugs caused. I think that you have the right idea that you should let your body do it's own work. Dp is nothing more than a defense mechanism. Yes it freaking sucks and it's incredibly easy to get caught up in being afraid of how you feel. But the truth is that at it's core, it's a defense mechanism. It's a process of your own body and trying to force that process with medication is generally high unsuccessful.

I really wish that I could make this easier for you and me both. *HUGS*


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## kaitlyn_b (Jun 9, 2010)

Melissa yes my DR was to the point of me trying to find just one reason every minute, not day or even hour, to not swallow a bullet. It may sound harsh but im just being real. You continue to say how paralyzed you are, but one thing ive noticed is how grammatically correct and on point you are in your posts. Darling, you arent as bad off as your brain is telling you. Melissa I cant even describe in words how bad I was 10 months ago. Yes I believe there is something wrong w you. It could be physical, it could be mentally (anxiety) but it is also your Perception of this too. Do not give up. You have to fight this. Do it for your future partner and your future children. Do it for your parents or your pets. I personally did it for God and his son Jesus Christ. As well as my dogs and parents and friends. I met my husband while I was derealized out of my mind. I was comparble to a zombie or a flatline. You can do it. Youre stronger than you think. Who cares if it takes a year? Its been 10 months for me and ill tell you I read my journal from about 8 months ago and I am a thousand times better! I can send you scanned copies if you want, hell ill post it up on here ive got no shame. Fight for your freedom!! We all have the ability. Every one of us on here do. Cmon girl. The change starts with YOU!!


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## thatfatguy (Dec 26, 2010)

You've had it longer than so I can assume that you've tried everything under the sun to get better, and I feel dumb and inexperienced to tell you how to get better, but maybe what I say can help. There was a time when I realized that I had forfeited so much to my condition that I had actually stopped living. I would just walk around with no purpose or sit starting at stuff. It was like I had no soul at all. I got mad at myself for wanting to continue to live my life again, but at the same time I was keeping myself from living. I was just happy for once in my life that because I had lost myself I started to realize how much I actually had. I had a loving mother and sister, we left my abusive father, and I quit my stressful dead end job. I was glad to be back in school filled with so many energetic, hopeful upbeat people, and even though I was in a living hell I promised I'd do whatever I could to help my family live a better life. From that point on it was not about me being in pain, it was about doing what was best for my family. We had suffered enough abuse from my father and we were all suffering inside, all in different ways, but I did not want them to know how much I was suffering, it would had pained them too much so I promised I would never freak out or given in.

Probably the best thing I did towards recovery was picking and choosing my battle with DP/DR. I knew I couldn't get myself back in one swift blow, so I had to choose what I could win and gain back. It was a long painfully tedious process, but I remember the first thing I won back was just being able to go with my family wherever they went. I dragged my dumbass to the store, park, friends house, and did everything they did. Though I didn't follow them to the theater or anything too exciting because I couldn't win my fight with my anxiety attacks at that point. Overtime, that aspect of going with them grew and I felt I was strong enough to just be on my own, zombie like of course. But it was a victory because before now I had gained a foothold in my condition. I did that with anxiety, stayed away from things that would set it off and coping with the little things. Eventually, I gained more strength and the little things didn't bother me and I moved on to bigger problems. I was gaining strength in many aspects of my life from walking, talking, thinking ect... I even forced myself to cry and laugh, it helped tremendously because it made me feel human. I slowly started reclaiming and relearning myself again, and even though it was forced it was a step in the right direction.

Everyday it was a fight, I chose where and when my victories would take place. Of course I would lose some strength and be weakened in others but that's part of recovery. I knew I would regain that strength later, but now was not the time. Eventually, I had enough power to deal with the more serious parts of my DP/DR like the panic attacks that would go off while I was dreaming, random thoughts and images, non stop music in my head. It was a hard fight, but everyday I could feel it weakening, becoming less and it gave me more determination and patient. One day I noticed I was bigger than my DP and from there on my strength over it grew tenfold. I'd wake up and feel it suffering me rather than me suffering it. Days would go by and I would grow bigger and bigger until it was just a small speck on my mind. I didn't know I had DR until I was at peace with myself, but by then I was too strong and confident for it to slow me down. DR did not last long in the ring with me.

I suppose what i'm trying to say is that I had to start small in order to get better. I had to play it smart, chose my battles and know my enemy. I savored my victories and did not let myself get down when I lost, because I knew if I had gone this far today, tomorrow i'd be able to go a bit further. Relearning myself, and remembering the little things I use to do helped tremendously. It felt forced most of the time and I had no emotion to go with it, but i was going in the right direction. I could catch myself laughing at jokes, with no emotion of course, but it the right thing. I believe over time those small things will snap back into place and eventually it will have a snowball effect on you.


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## NeglectingDefinitionOfReal (Dec 22, 2010)

kaitlyn_b said:


> Cmon girl. The change starts with YOU!!


Change is important

http://headville.net/2011/02/02/everything/


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