# unsure..



## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

I was so too quick to say that i was better again! I think lots of things in my life have to change before I can say that I'm better, i can't sleep 2nite an I keep obsessing about the past! I dont know if i feel like me, i dont know what i feel like, i think i have to face up to my problems otherwise they'll always come back, i need to face up to everything then move on an put all the bad stuff behind me for good







x


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## shattered memories (Jul 19, 2012)

sounds like u know what to do already. collect urself and focus. u got this


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

Yeah I guess I just have to let things go so that i can be happy







live in the present not in the past <3 an be aware of stuff that upsets me so that i dont focus on it x


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

A lot of people say we have to face our fears and traumas, others say we have to move on with our life and make the most of it.

I think it requires a combination of those 2 to actually feel better and eventually recover, I've found out recently that I had a few traumatic events back when I was a kid and I'm trying to "go back" in time in my memory to see what I was thinking and feeling when I was exposed to those situations, I think that'll help me getting rid of emotions that have been lurking in my head for years.

I've also been trying to move on with my life, I've been doing a lot of stuff I used to avoid, the combination of these 2 seems perfect to me, so if you do have hidden traumas or if you know exactly what happened, try and figure out how you felt and make peace with yourself, also try to do things you'd usually avoid because they will make you feel more disconnected from reality, and most important of all, do not let yourself go down whenever you're feeling worse!


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

Yeah it kind of makes sense that to go forward u have to go back an make peace with stuff, if i dont i feel like my problems might just keep coming back, i get very angry when people say anything negative to me aswell, i think deep down I'm quite angry coz i feel like ive let myself be bullied for a lot of my life! An i feel angry that i have ocd an stuff even tho its no ones fault lol, i feel angry that other people can just do things so easily an have a normal life an i cant sometimes but I'll be ok







i just need to focus on positive things an not let other peoples negativity affect me







I'm grateful to be here an appreciate life







i never thought I'd make it to 24 so I'm not gonna have a shit one! I'm gonna make sure my life is good an when ive got through all my problems it will be even better







x


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

smiley x said:


> Yeah it kind of makes sense that to go forward u have to go back an make peace with stuff, if i dont i feel like my problems might just keep coming back, i get very angry when people say anything negative to me aswell, i think deep down I'm quite angry coz i feel like ive let myself be bullied for a lot of my life! An i feel angry that i have ocd an stuff even tho its no ones fault lol, i feel angry that other people can just do things so easily an have a normal life an i cant sometimes but I'll be ok
> 
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Yep I can totally relate to the part where you let yourself get bullied, I did the same and I spent years being mad at myself because I didn't do anything about it, but we just have to let that go and find peace, one thing we should never do is seek revenge.

Also, it helps a lot to talk about that with someone, tell them how you felt back then, how mad you probably got because you never did anything, you'll probably feel better!


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

Yeah I think sometimes people mistake being kind for being stupid dont they lol, i will start standing up for myself more otherwise eventually i just snap an then end up feeling guilty x


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

smiley x said:


> Yeah I think sometimes people mistake being kind for being stupid dont they lol, i will start standing up for myself more otherwise eventually i just snap an then end up feeling guilty x


In this life we should avoid fighting and such, yet sometimes we really have to stand up for ourselves, if the abuse gets too serious action needs to be taken. Sometimes you can't really do much about it, when that's the case, be at peace with it, because sometimes we have to accept that there are things we just cannot do, or it's just better if we don't do it


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## Fearthainn (Feb 19, 2009)

I think most of us know what to do - which is to let go, but we just can't do it in this state. Our brain keeps making us doubt ourselves and we think what if these feelings are real? The existential thoughts aren't helpful. I honestly obsess about the meaning of good and bad - why should I choose to be happy rather than sad? Why feel emotions and not be completely rational?

But anyway, I don't want to make you worse









I went to a psychoanalyst (or analrapist if you prefer







) for a couple of years in my youth, and although I didn't find her and psychoanalysis to be terribly helpful, I try to keep some of her wisdom in mind. Once I asked her something like "if I just let go how will I be able to know what is really important? How will I be able to think so deeply again?". Her reply was that when we let go our mind never lets us forget what is important to us.

It sounds like a cliche but once I let go the last time I went through DP/DR a few years ago, I found it to be true. I couldn't recall the feeling of DP/DR exactly anymore fortunately, but all my emotions and thoughts were still there. I was still me. It was just that my beliefs, the thoughts that really mattered kept coming to me without sending me into collapse, and the less important ones, such as many of the questions we ask ourselves right now, eventually faded away. I was happy with life and happy with my answers, and those answers were often the same as when going through DP/DR. It was just that my perspective had changed.

So yeah, letting go and accepting the real reality is the way. Easier said than done though.


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

Fearthainn said:


> So yeah, letting go and accepting the real reality is the way. Easier said than done though.


Just takes some time =)


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

PositiveThinking! said:


> In this life we should avoid fighting and such, yet sometimes we really have to stand up for ourselves, if the abuse gets too serious action needs to be taken. Sometimes you can't really do much about it, when that's the case, be at peace with it, because sometimes we have to accept that there are things we just cannot do, or it's just better if we don't do it


Yeah I do overreact about stuff that people say sometimes lol, i never really did well at school or college an i was lazy an stuff lol but ive tried so hard to change all that, ive had the same job for ages an hardly ever missed a day (touch wood lol) i wanna go back to college an do nursing but but then someone can just say one silly comment an I'll feel like I'm nothing x


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

Fearthainn said:


> I think most of us know what to do - which is to let go, but we just can't do it in this state. Our brain keeps making us doubt ourselves and we think what if these feelings are real? The existential thoughts aren't helpful. I honestly obsess about the meaning of good and bad - why should I choose to be happy rather than sad? Why feel emotions and not be completely rational?
> 
> But anyway, I don't want to make you worse
> 
> ...


aww thankyou







yeah i know i need to let go an stop obsessing about stuff so much! what she said to u makes sense. I felt fine for ages but went through a stressful time recently which is what made my dp come back but its going again now







i do worry about things too much but I'm gonna try an just be happy an enjoy my life







x


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

smiley x said:


> Yeah I do overreact about stuff that people say sometimes lol, i never really did well at school or college an i was lazy an stuff lol but ive tried so hard to change all that, ive had the same job for ages an hardly ever missed a day (touch wood lol) i wanna go back to college an do nursing but but then someone can just say one silly comment an I'll feel like I'm nothing x


Don't let silly comments take you down! If there's something I learned from these past 3 years, is that I need to give myself waaaay more value, I'm way better than what I think and I've been suffering for a long time because I thought I wasn't worth anything, you'll figure that out too soon


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

PositiveThinking! said:


> Don't let silly comments take you down! If there's something I learned from these past 3 years, is that I need to give myself waaaay more value, I'm way better than what I think and I've been suffering for a long time because I thought I wasn't worth anything, you'll figure that out too soon


Aww thankyou! that's a nice thing to say







I'm glad you've learnt to value yourself more, I don't know u but u seem like a nice person lol


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

smiley x said:


> Aww thankyou! that's a nice thing to say
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Oh that's because I am! xD

No problem, just wanna see everyone here getting up on their feet


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## onlygirlintheworld (Jul 3, 2012)

PositiveThinking! said:


> Oh that's because I am! xD
> 
> No problem, just wanna see everyone here getting up on their feet


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