# along with DP/DR, I have these OCD thoughts.. help



## sirlee (Mar 5, 2014)

I've been suffering for Pure O thoughts after a panic attack I had while high. I had been smoking weed for a year before and had been totally fine, even tried LSD about 3 times. but then I started fearing I was going to become schizophrenic, and I have had all sorts of crazy thoughts that linger in my head and feel real. Most of them have gone away, but sometimes when theyre bad,well I can't even explain how painful it is.

Right now Im dealing with thoughts that theres cameras around me and I constantly think that. Sometimes I can fight that yet it seems like my perception shift for a second and I truly believe them. I also have had thoughts recently that theres a chip in my brain controlling my emotions. I know there is no logic to this, I know it, yet these thoughts become ingrained in my head so quickly. I'm just worried that after 22 months of dealing with this madness and not doing drugs anymore btw, I'm finally aobut to become delirious or delusional. I was wondering if any ya'll know of anyone who this has happened to, or if anyone has recovered, and how. Sorry for the long post, Ive been classified as OCD before. I know that this all sounds cray, but I just feel that because I know a lot about the thoughts ocd people have, I have brought them upon myself too. Thanks for reading this. Btw my derealization and depersonalization are almost gone, they just come op on days when im really anxious, but progress with these symptoms is slow.

Sirlee


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## sirlee (Mar 5, 2014)

anyone? I seriously would like some help


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## LukeThinksTooMuch (Feb 28, 2015)

Sometimes members on the blog cannot help you as they do not share the same exact experience as you but I assure you that you're not the only person who suffers from paranoia which is apparent here. I myself suffered from paranoia for a while when I thought that everyone was trying to poison everything I ate. I would never let anyone near my while I was eating and I would think everyone could know what I was doing at all times. These thoughts were absurd and were fueled by my anxiety which is something many many people with DPD have in common.

Nobody on this forum can provide you with the help you need from somebody experienced like a psychiatrist. All we can tell you is that you're not alone in these feelings and our opinions and my opinion is that getting help for anxiety as a whole and any other issues you may have is key and ensuring not to let yourself think that they will pass with time.


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## sirlee (Mar 5, 2014)

How did you get cured? And were you classified as delusional of just with anxiety or what? I just wish I knew what to do to get better or if i can get better.



LukeThinksTooMuch said:


> All we can tell you is that you're not alone in these feelings and our opinions and my opinion is that getting help for anxiety as a whole and any other issues you may have is key and ensuring not to let yourself think that they will pass with time.


So they wont pass with time? That's what you're saying?


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## LukeThinksTooMuch (Feb 28, 2015)

Without a change of environment, they won't change soon but that's not to say they won't change at all. I was told I had simple anxiety coupled with paranoia. This might or might not apply to you. I recommend seeing someone, it's the only way to be certain but not a GP as they will only tell you physical issues so when they tell you that you're fine, it can leave you feeling worse.


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## ckenyon (Apr 14, 2015)

Try Anafranil. It's great for OCD, which in my opinion is the root cause of DPD.


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## sirlee (Mar 5, 2014)

LukeThinksTooMuch said:


> Without a change of environment, they won't change soon but that's not to say they won't change at all. I was told I had simple anxiety coupled with paranoia. This might or might not apply to you. I recommend seeing someone, it's the only way to be certain but not a GP as they will only tell you physical issues so when they tell you that you're fine, it can leave you feeling worse.


change of environment? I have and ive been diagnosed as ocd after afew tests and pre delirious by a psychiatrist who saw me for 45 minutes one time and then decided to giv me anti depressants and anti psychotics, the antipsychotics made things worse. I dont know why i have been so bad these past few weeks since i ave been recovring sowly but very surely these past two years, i thought it was done with this intense madness. Its just that I saw this woman on youtube who suffers from delusions when she is depressed cause of her bipolar disorder, and I just think that thats whats hapening to me now. I dont feel like i suffer from depersonalization or DR that much anymore, at least not the brain fog really, I do have moments where i question everything, and I am highly highly anxious al the time, taking deep breaths. By I dont understand why I wake up and immediately have thoughts that theres cameras everywhere, and that people are actors, or that people can hear me in my car, I havent had this in ever really, and theyre all kind of semi related, plus i make connections about it all the freaking time that I know cant be true, so wtf?



ckenyon said:


> Try Anafranil. It's great for OCD, which in my opinion is the root cause of DPD.


so you think thats the rot cause for me, like thats whats happening, cause the response was kind of ambiguous...



Road2recover said:


> if your actually aware and typing on this forum about fearing somthing actually means that you therefore cannot aquire it. Thats a good sign to fear it. people who are delusional dont question it, so thats a good sign for you. sounds just like dissoatiation to me when i had dp episodes i had weird thoughts but i never beleived them, it was jsut ocd.


but i feel like i believe them, evn though i dont, its very hard to explain and understand. I just want to be healed already


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## WorkingOnIt (Oct 10, 2014)

Sirlee, in my perspective feeling like you believe something even though you don't is synonymous with having anxiety, not delusions. In my mind it is precisely the same as if you had social anxiety and just FELT like you couldn't talk to people. Another example I heard was of a guy with OCD who would check inside envelopes before throwing them away. The reason? He loved his daughter so much and couldn't stand the thought that maybe she was in one of those envelopes. Rediculous! He knew it too, but he FELT it.

Nevertheless, only a psychiatrist/psychologist can make proper assessments.


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## Sweet Jane (Feb 11, 2014)

sirlee said:


> I know there is no logic to this, I know it, yet these thoughts become ingrained in my head so quickly. I'm just worried that after 22 months of dealing with this madness and not doing drugs anymore btw, I'm finally aobut to become delirious or delusional.


i guess if you're aware of them, and know they have no logic you're probably creating obsessive thoughts, and you're not delusional. Maybe you're so scared to become psychotic that you're stuck in this thoughts. I had something similar, but went away quickly when i realized it was only OCD (and my intense fear of become schizophrenic) than a real psychosis


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