# I'm cured.



## richiecripps

I'm cured of depersonalization and derealization but first i wanna tell you about my symptoms that made me feel as if i didnt live anymore. It was about a year and a half ago that i was out at a punk rock show with my friends. i was drunk and on an ecstasy pill which wasn't uncommon for me at the time. i had an anxiety disorder but i didnt relaise what it was at the time. i smoked pot everyday and had never even heard of dp/dr. on the way back from the show my friend told me that my weed dealer had some LSD tabs, having never tired it i thought why not....? that was a mistake that never really left my mind for a year. during the trip i had horribel thoughts of myself going insane and being brain damaged. i woke the next day feeling normal but not quite right. For the next week i jus put it down to flash backs and being paranoid. a month later i was still feeling not right and had the impression that i was going insane. for some reason the thing that worried me the most was that my sense of homour had died. i constantly annalised myslef comparing what i am now to what i was in my "pre-lsd days". if someone said something to me my sub-consious instantly told me that before i took lsd i would have cmope out with the funniest comeback ever. then i started to get the impressuion that i had a headache where there wasn't a part of my head! then i felt as though my thinking was being done just above my head! my legs were numb and i didn't recognise my hands as well as myself in the mirror. i got home to the house i lived in for twenty and it looked like i'd never seen it before. things looked as if they were breathing and the floor looked like it the sea. i was convinced i was schizophrenic and no samount of doctors or councillers could convince me otherwise! i got used to the idea that i was eventually going to spend the rest of my days in a mental home. the bit that reeeally got me though was constantly questioning how my mind worked, how memeories were still there and seeing pictures in my head. it was an obsession, i totally couldn't stop thnking about it. i never questioned life so much. i saw my brain as broken and there was going no back, somehow i felt deserving for putting in chemicals. this was it, im ofically insane. i still didnt know what dp/dr was. i felt so detatched from my friends and it felt as though everything i said in conversation didnt count. i felt unable to have conversations even, i felt my brain was to broken. i had been diagnosed with depressiona nd took the doctors word for it...why wouldnt i? he's a professional! i took my prozac (fluoxotine) every day and spent my days on the web looking for a miricle cure. i then went onto the linden method site and learnt about dp/dr which eventually led me to this site. i spent hours and hours on this site every day and believe it or not it made me worsde and worse. i could feel myself getting worse while on this site and i felt my dp/dr was at it's worse after councilling sessions. i couln't get why this was... now i know. i beame obsessed with thinking. thinking about thinkning about thinking. i couldn't get it and it made me mad, everyone just told me to get a grip but they didnt understand. at a total loss i called up the linden method hoping for them to shed some light. they discussed with me that dp/dr were nothing more than anxiety symptoms which, to put it politely i thought "b*llocks" LSD had done this to me... not anxiety. joining the linden method was far more than out of my price range. It was ?130 (i dunno what it is in yanks dollars) but if it didnt work you got your money back, so either i got cured of this demon i fight or i didnt spend a penny! win win. i got the method through in a few days and read it from front to back, the booklet didnt specalise in dp/dr much at all and i thought this wouldn't work but it was the over the phne councilling that taught me to view dp/dr as symptoms of anxiety. i got off of my medication which was doing me more harm then good and quit visiting councillers. i got taught to divert horribel anxious thoughts by not focusing on them. talking bout dp, researching dp, coming on this site, does any of it help? going to your concileer and having an hour where you speak about your condidtion is supposed to help but how does it??? all you do is keep it fresh in your mind. i visted a doctor about my dp at least once a week but that never helped. this site was the worst for me though, i would come on here at tleast once a day and type and read and type and read about symptoms, fears of insanity, moaning about it ending but it wouldnt. how is dp/dr supposed to end if you focus on it all the fucking time?!?!?!?!? "think about something else" is a phrase i learnt to hate! everyone said it but theres a lot of truth in it. why focus on it? sure it'll pop up in your head but thats only because your spending every minute god sends at the doctors, in the councillers, tlaking to people about it, trying to find a mircle cure and on this fucking site! you (like i was) are obsessed with dp/dr. are you ever in a situation where you temoraliy forget your dp/dr/anxiety?? that's because your mind is focusing something else. i noticed that my saviour was forming a band... my mind focused on something else! i stopped going on the intenet and stopped going to the docs, counciller but the urge to didnt stop for a while. infact a good couple of months... but once the habit was dead i never felt the urge! now days i dont even think about dp and dr because i dont allow the pain in the ass in my mind. diversion id the answer you need to divert your mind. this site and other anxiety related sites, programmes, books etc are feeding yuour anxiety...it's making itself comfortable in amrchair of your mind. i dont come on this site and i havent done since i was cured but rather then get cured and never looking back i though i'd tell people who are certain this is permenant that it's not, i thought i'd tell the people who are certain they are schizophrenic that they are totally sane... it's just the abilitly to believe it that's temporalily out of tune. i dont talk about, write about or even think about dp/dr anymore but if iwas to regualry come back to this site and discuss it i think i would have it as bad as before again. your not insane... you have anxiety which have symptoms called depresonalitzation and derealization. i'm never coming back to this site but my e-mail address is [email protected] so e-mail me if you need any advice but my advice will only be stop focusing on dp/dr. join the linden method... it saved my life and completely cured me xx


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## Universal

people are saying that the linden method is a scam. can you describe what it entails and how it has helped you? what do you think about the depersonalization program they got going? http://www.anxietybusters.com/dpprogram.htm


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## stickdude

all i have to say is wow, i'm glad i found this post. this is the exact same way i started out with this mess (except i took ecstacy) and i have the same obsessions everyday with life. it's so wonderful to see that you got cured too and that i won't be with this forever also with the right help!


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## Mollusk

Hmm, i hope you are right. I have been debating with myself whether i should distract myself and ignore the thoughts or face them and try to figure out the answer. I guess your story makes a strong case for completely ignoring the thoughts. It seems like a smart way to go, but i can't help feeling like there is something i need to unearth and confront that won't go away by just glossing it over.


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## Guest

Jesus, both those systems are expensive. I don't have DP, just sorta DR I think, triggered by pot. The Linden method sounds good, but it looks WAAAAAAAAY to much like a scam for me to ever use. And I really think an anxiety treatment would help (I haven't been to a doctor or anything yet, and absolutely don't want to try medication without first trying a more personal system).

But, I think I'm halfway over it, since an attitude change, making myself believe I'm in the real world, and like somebody else said, knowing/telling yourself that you're tired of worrying and you're too busy for this really has helped.

So, please, does anybody have a link to a good online anxiety self-treatment (you know, the FREE kind)? I'm sure there are sites that tell how how to do it without $160 DVDs. That's absurd.


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## jc

ive read and used the linden method and it basically consists of

1/distraction teqniques
2/withdrawing in a controlled manner from all meds
3/changing a diet to control blood sugar levels (cutting down on bad carbs i.e white bread, white pasta)
4/stop dependance on shrinks,doctors,and so called mirical cures
5/breathing correction (i found this very helpful with my morning anxiety)

i personally found it very helpful and i still read the book every now and again,it doesnt seem like a scam at all as its just good advice given,and if followed properly anxiety levels will drop


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## Space Cadet

That's great to hear. I must admit I read this post during a very dark hour and it's given me some much needed hope.

I totally agree with you about the obssesing part. I keep coming to this site thinking I'll find a miracle cure, but usually just wind up feeling worse. I also feel like I'm taking on more symptoms just by reading other peoples descriptions. It's kind of like a scab I keep on picking at. Think I'll have to take up a hobby which I can redirect that obsession into.

Anyway thanks again for the great post.


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## jc

i know for a fact there is no miracle cure,but back in the day i would obsess over each new post...but in a funny way this was distracting me,but you do realize that the only way out is really through good diet distraction and getting on with life...sure i visit this site but i like to keep a check on things and see how other folks are doing....and this is maybe going to sound a little warped but knowing that others are suffering makes me feel better(i wish others wernt suffering but thats life)

my anxiety started i believe as a result of alcohol abuse while trying to blot out all the bad things going on in my life at the time but i was just too damn young and stupid to realise that my body/mind would give out in the end,but the silly thing is i still go on these 2 day drink binges every 2 or 3 weeks...sometimes we never learn....
but the main thing for me now is to taper off of meds while replacing them with good diet and supplements...i honestly feel that these meds are maybe putting too many chemicals in my brain that i dont really need thus unknowingly overdosing...anyway just my oppinion


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## fingertingle

Controlling blood sugar levels? 
That's practically my only responsibility, being diabetic... controlling my blood sugar. Is there a reason why blood sugar levels are in any way related to dp/dr? People are never supposed to have a blood sugar above a certain level (around 115?) and the function of the pancreas is to keep blood sugar below that level. No matter how much sugar a person is consuming, if they have healthy pancreatic function, their blood sugar will stay normal.


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## orangeaid

Everything is an obsession, Your brain is always stressed out because of them.

Obessions can rule your mind, your life. I think a lot of the times wow I dont have many obessions. First off I obesse about not or to obesse. Even though I might not think I am I know that sub conciously things are bothering me subtley which adds up for a rather strong effect.

The only way I feel that we can get over this is to gather knowledge about the disorder, think about it. Make conclusions. Make choices. I foudn that when I sat down at nights and tried to reason stuff out I found that I could understand what was happen to me. I really feel there is nothing that I nor anyone else can tell you to _cure_ it, they can help you cope but to get over you need to make the difference. I think diving into your thought processes trying to understand why you do things has helped me I dont knwo what it will do for others.

And yes medication will def help with this, it aids you gives you a fighting chance for some people. I know paxil has made a world of difference in my life, not at first though but a few weeks later WOW.


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## Guest

I definitely don't feel worse using this site. I'm so happy to feel normal somewhere and I think I'm in good company. Even if we had nothing else in common, we have this and I think many of the long-term dpers have spent years discovering sides of life that others never think of. You people seem really bright to me and I'm grateful for this kind of company and the myriad of personalities that come here. I know I'm biased, but there's a lack of b.s. here - I don't get the feeling that most people on this board are shallow and for me, that's unusual. Did I describe this right? I'm not trying to make it seem elitist, I just find something here that I don't normally find.


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## Guest

widescreened's advice was to think of something else. My problem is I have very little self-awareness. I am usually far away in my thoughts and DON'T REALIZE that I'm not in my body. And when I do practical things and pull my mind back into my body as well as I can, I feel dull and unhappy = depressed. So that doesn't help me. 
But good for you, widescreened. 
My route out of this is going through it. Someone has the Churchill quote about going through hell and I have been buoyed up seeing that a few times.


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## jc

the thing about dropping carbs and getting sugar out of your system is so the body isnt filled with stimulants

sugar
alcohol
nicotine
caffeine

all stimulants

i must admit that i keep my body sugar free apart from the odd bottle of dry white wine and i do feel kinnda' flat' at times but the anxiety is reduced without stimulants......if you smoke i bet your first ciggarette increases your anxitey


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## sleepingbeauty

jc said:


> ive read and used the linden method and it basically consists of
> 
> 1/distraction teqniques
> 2/withdrawing in a controlled manner from all meds
> 3/changing a diet to control blood sugar levels (cutting down on bad carbs i.e white bread, white pasta)
> 4/stop dependance on shrinks,doctors,and so called mirical cures
> 5/breathing correction (i found this very helpful with my morning anxiety)
> 
> i personally found it very helpful and i still read the book every now and again,it doesnt seem like a scam at all as its just good advice given,and if followed properly anxiety levels will drop


sounds to me like it would really help with panic disorder, but dp? hmmm.. maybe if said persons dp is a result of anxiety.. but what if its a result of brain damage?? i think thats where mine comes from, some kind of birth trauma. i do also have panic disorder, but ive learned to control it by avoiding triggers, usually ingested substances and poor eating. and deep breathing definately helps when i feel one coming on. dp ive always had and i think i will always have. im always in '2 worlds' and have been since birth.


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## jc

yes i can only speak for anxiety disorders,im not sure about dp/dr as a result of some kind of brain trauma


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## Malory

Well it wouldn't work for me, I didn't even know I had a condition that other people have until today. I've been living with it for 16 years without anything to obssess about, no websites, no books, no councellors or anything like that. I would have given anything for just one other person to talk to who feels like me over all those years. I don't take drugs, recreational or medicinal; I have been put on Prozac before, which didn't make the DR go away but made me not care about it as much, which wasn't really much use to me.


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## Guest

Hi I'm new at this site, so I will just give a quick review of my story,
Iam also completely recoved, by the lynden method, if you follow it to the T you will also recover i truely believe it, its just that some people find it a little harder to believe in themselves than others, and believing in your abilities is one of the things we lack when we suffer from panic disorder or anxiety. BUT Im writing not just for me but for my close friend, he suffers bad dp and dr, but he truely believes that his was caused by effexor. (ssnri) Im sure weve all heard of them. He has spent many days not even reconising his surroundings, and hes worse when he leaves the house, so hes stuck at home thinking all day, looking for miracles, I dont doubt the medication bought on the dp, but I still think it can be fixed, Im just hoping some others will come forward and reply to this to help him not feel so alone. I have tried to convince him that its anxiety causeing the dp, but when your brain feel so sick its hard to believe you will ever recover. thanks for listening hope to hear from anyone with similar experiences[/quote]


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## freesong

JC, thanks for the synopsis of the Linden method. It makes total sense to me.  Most of what he suggests I am attempting to do. I do think, in my case that something is amiss in the temporal lobe area and I am going to a neurologist to check it out. Having hormones tested and urine tested for nutrient deficiencies and taking correct vitamin/minerals in proper dosages thanks to lots of counsel and checks and balances. I am staying very busy with jobs and friends and children. Not 100% yet, but when I get good sleep, I am good to go. There seems to be a sleep connection for me (sleep seizures I think) but the advice is just good common sense. The body, if it is not damaged by accident or hereditary predisposistion to illness or too much stress is meant to heal itself with right eating habits, sleep habits and exercise. But, if there is a real problem, ie. porphyria, temporal lobe epilepsy etc. then more must be done to correct. In my case, I hope it can be accomplished as naturally and safely as possible.


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