# Getting frustrated and could use some reassurance.



## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

So basically im doing alot better the last week or so and some of the symptoms that bothered me before no longer bother me. Yesteday and today have been awful. Recovery seems to be so frickn up n down!

Okay so id just like to know if anyone has experienced similiar thoughts and feeling. I know everyone has different imaginations so thoughts may not exactly be like mine. , here goes:

I feel like its not normal to exist anymore . (even though logically i know it is)

I feel like there is no ''home'' feeling or feeling of ''normal '' anywhere now because of the way i have thought. I keep thinking well i only ever thought this place was normal because i am meant to think that so now i know this i cant think its normal.

I feel like my life isnt real. but i know it is. I feel like i dont know anything and wonder how i know how to do things because it feels like i have had a labotomy.

Everything feels new and terrifying.

Symptoms change daily ! .I feel like if i walk around and do as normal theres a part of me thats like stop playing along with this lie in this weird place. and then that makes me anxious cause I have no choice im trapped here.

Im feel like i just arrived here. yet there is nothing i dont know. theres this feeling of not belonging anywhere and cant trust anything not even my own mind. Jsut basically feel in limbo.

I know this is dp but because of the thoughts and feelings being so complicated it makes me second guess.

I guess im just wondering if it can go.

And i dont feel like myself i feel like an object with eyes and I constantly need to go through the timeline of my life to make sense of myself.

Thanks guess. Any help is appreciated. please no negative posts thanks. Katie


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

I also try to think my way out cause it just seems utterly baffling that it could go back to normal without me doing so.


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## apoplexy (Jan 4, 2013)

1. You can't think yourself out, that's not how it works. In fact, it's part of the problem.

2. Reassurance doesn't work. If 10 people tell you they feel the exact same way, you'll still get thoughts like "what if they have a different situation" - "what if they're lying" - etc. That's how OCD works.

Watch Mark Freeman's video on YouTube if you genuinely want to start following a more effective approach to recovery.


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

Ok i will . I am just having the worst day ever. I was feeling really good so the other night i went out to a nightclub and drank my heart out had a ball and was so happy to be doing well. Then today 2 days later my anxiety is through the roof and i cant stop crying. Its hell. Your right I cannot think myslf out. But Im afraid I have thought in such a way i cannot reverse . this is what scares me and makes me feel the need to fight with it.


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## apoplexy (Jan 4, 2013)

You really should not be drinking if you want to recover, IMO.

https://www.youtube.com/user/23katied/videos

I'd highly recommend you watch 1-10 of those videos as well.


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## Guest (Sep 25, 2015)

Drinking and DP don't mix as apop said. It's most likely the cause of your rebound anxiety


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

i know ye. was a bad idea. I got cocky cause I was feeling good. Is everything i said part of dp. Im just afraid ive gone too far in my brain and over analysed and cant go back.


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## apoplexy (Jan 4, 2013)

If people telling you "it's just DP" didn't work the first 20 times what makes you think if someone says "don't worry, it's just DP" it's going to magically work the 21st time and stop you from feeling anxious? Don't you realize that reassurance seeking does not work at all? In fact, it's what traps people for years.


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## grant9 (Sep 18, 2015)

Try avoid alcohol completely Katie! For me it makes the symptoms 100 times worse. Caffeine is also a big no no for me I can't touch it all


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## grant9 (Sep 18, 2015)

How are your sleeping paterns Katie, how many hours do you get in a night?


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

i sleep about 8 hours a night grant, apoplexy , i know u are right. Just hard to believe that its anything other than just me.


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## apoplexy (Jan 4, 2013)

Good, we're making progress. Get the book "Freedom from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder" by Grayson, read it, learn it, love it. OCD is a MONSTROUS part of DP.


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

I will apop . Once I stop the loop of obsessing does my mind still need time to heal . I'd say there was a good 4 days I completely ignored it and it got so much better but still then woke up the next morning with it there strong.


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## grant9 (Sep 18, 2015)

I'm exactly the same Katie... I'll have a few days where I feel great and then I'll fall straight back into the vicious cycle again.


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## grant9 (Sep 18, 2015)

I'm lucky if I get 4-5 hours of sleep a night


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

do you think that its part of recovery to go 2 steps forward one back like that?


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## grant9 (Sep 18, 2015)

Good question... I guess nobody will ever know the answer to that Katie. I always have hope though and think to myself that maybe it's supposed to go like this in order to get better


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## 103905 (Nov 30, 2016)

Hey Katie, I feel like I can relate and its very hard for me, but Im glad you did ok that week ^^ even if this is an old post I hope you are doing fine


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