# I think my dp is gone?



## paul from arizona (Jan 9, 2014)

So I had this DP bullshit for about a month and a half, and it kind of ruined my life very quickly. I lost my job, my parents wont help me and think im just being dramatic and crazy, i cant see a doctor because my benefits were lost when i stopped working, and I have been getting so much shit from my family about not bringing in money and paying my rent, so I LITTERALLY HAVE NO SUPPORT AT ALL!! and it scared the ever living shit out of me. so I educated my self on what DP is, and how its caused, and how I got it. i learned to be okay with it and knowing it will go away, the symptoms subsided within weeks. so now i feel like my depersonalization is gone but i keep obsessing to see if the symptoms are still there 24/7 AND CANT get the thought out of my head. its like i cant even feel happy or calm because im constently putting my thoughts and energy on checking if my symptoms are gone?? so im wondering is my DP really gone completely or am i just having bad anxiety? i got it from smoking weed wich is weird because i used to smoke ALOT back in 2008-2011 and never had problems. my symptoms were very strong the first two weeks then they started going away slowly, and by the 6th week i felt normal. but like i said im constantly checking if my symptoms are gone?? PLEASE HELP im new to this website.


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## chelsy010 (Oct 29, 2012)

When your symptoms are gone you will feel like your normal self. If you don't feel like your normal self then something is still off, it may not be dp related it could anxiety,obessive behaviour but the truth is you will know when your dp symptoms have left. If I were you I would try to calm down/relax because increasing your anxiety will not help you in anyway. Hope this helps.


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## JJ123D (Dec 6, 2013)

chelsy010 said:


> When your symptoms are gone you will feel like your normal self. If you don't feel like your normal self then something is still off, it may not be dp related it could anxiety,obessive behaviour but the truth is you will know when your dp symptoms have left. If I were you I would try to calm down/relax because increasing your anxiety will not help you in anyway. Hope this helps.


How do you know that you will feel like your normal self when the DP is gone? I mean some people spend 10 years in DP, will they come back to how they were 10 years ago? Isn't that a long time, even years, for them to change their thoughts and world perspective, your perspective is yourself..

I wish I could back to my normal self before DP, but it seems like I'm moving forward I don't know if that's possible anymore but I do hope so. I heard some people saying that they changed a lot after DP and others saying that they went back to being exactly like before DP. I seldom experience moments of being my old normal self but these moments kept decreasing over time until they are almost gone...

How can you be sure of what you said?


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## chelsy010 (Oct 29, 2012)

JJ123D said:


> How do you know that you will feel like your normal self when the DP is gone? I mean some people spend 10 years in DP, will they come back to how they were 10 years ago? Isn't that a long time, even years, for them to change their thoughts and world perspective, your perspective is yourself..
> 
> I wish I could back to my normal self before DP, but it seems like I'm moving forward I don't know if that's possible anymore but I do hope so. I heard some people saying that they changed a lot after DP and others saying that they went back to being exactly like before DP. I seldom experience moments of being my old normal self but these moments kept decreasing over time until they are almost gone...
> 
> How can you be sure of what you said?


when I say normal self, I'm refering to feeling like a normal human being. After your dp and dr has left, you will be able to connect to yourself and reality.whatever your veiws are or whatever your experiencing in your life, when your dp and dr is gone you will be able to connect to both. I was not referring to your veiws and attitude after recover,that would vary for each individual. I was just saying that when you are no longer dissconnected (dr/dp) that would mean your now reconnected to yourself and reality hence feeling like a normal human being again. This is what I'm experincing as I recover and everyone who has fully recovered will tell you the same thing. Are you recovering or getting worse?


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## chelsy010 (Oct 29, 2012)

.


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## JJ123D (Dec 6, 2013)

Am I feeling like a normal human being again? I really don't know. My journey feels like this: ME --> DP VOID --> Learning things all over again.

I got rid of my mind thinking it's fake and that it caused delusional social anxiety, and now I'm trying to get it back or develop another mind. I have thought in my head, but I don't know which ones are mine, which ones to follow and which ones to ignore.

Although I'm trying to move on and be healthier, I always feel that there is my old opinion deep down in mind, that's telling me how things should be again. I don't know whether to let that opinion go or to try to get it back, I don't know which way is recovery.

I don't feel my mind is waking up, I feel it's just developing from sleeping to sleep walking. I seldom feel my mind wake up for a couple of seconds and I become myself again, but the environment around me and 1.5 years I got used to bring me back to sleep. That and questioning my motivation for living on the path I used to live on.

I don't think I found my recovery way back, but I'm just doing the obvious things... gym, eating better, getting a less challenging job... But I don't know if that's making me accept what I have become more.


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## chelsy010 (Oct 29, 2012)

Well, you have the right attitude. Your actually actively trying to recover. I know that recovery is different for everyone and so are the methods they used. But if ever you want to try to do what I'm doing, just message me and will gladly help you as much as I can.


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## Dillweed (Feb 5, 2014)

If it's gone you'll know it.


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## tmarrow (Feb 2, 2014)

Man, I can definitely relate to how hard it is to function with this. Though, in a sense you're lucky; for many people it takes much longer to go away. I'm going on over 5 months of heavy DP (feeling a lot better though) and I consider myself a lucky one!

I always compulsively check to see if the symptoms are still there. It's only natural. And I think it'll be that way for a bit once I do effectively recover. At first when you get out of it, you are in the habit of checking to see the level of DP. And probably for the first week or 2, you will have this habit (habits are tought to break). Also, if you do sense it being better, it might be very reassuring to keep checking it, b/c you're back to reality.

I don't think the fact that you're still obsessing is solid proof it isn't gone. You should probably be able to tell that just by mentally checking to see if you feel 'all there' or whatever sense of what 'normalcy' is expected to be.

Above all, hang in there, and don't do anything to jeapordize getting back into this state!! Stay away from drugs and chronic use of caffeine and alcohol. GET ENOUGH SLEEP. Remember, the first few months after getting out of it, you are probably the susceptible to get back in.


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## enroute (Sep 3, 2013)

Stick to the gameplan without checking in too much and you will see results.


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## WeedInduced (Feb 8, 2014)

I'm no psychologist, but it seems like what you need now is just some healthy distraction. You're checking your sanity because you're not distracted; try to get out. Try to go do some things with family or friends if possible. Spend as little time alone as possible. And when you're alone, do something interactive. Play a video game or something, as opposed to watching TV or checking this forum. You're in the home stretch.


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