# Once Seen, Cannot Be Easily Unseen



## Guest (Feb 2, 2015)

Could this be the contributing factor in preventing recovery?


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## sunjet (Nov 21, 2014)

Yes, I think. Even if I don't feel DP-ed, because I feel that i'm ME and i don't feel like I have DR because I'm aware of my existence and surroundings. But i'm find it very hard to say that i'm recovered, like something is still there, like it's a brain fog or you just don't have it but you just don't know how it is without dpdr to say that you are completely free.

Maybe I'm 100% recovered, but something tells me that no. Why?


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## newbie101 (Nov 13, 2014)

Ya that's like me!! Its like something is there. But I'm fine..


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## WorkingOnIt (Oct 10, 2014)

Thank you for posting this ThoughtOnFire. It's hard with a subjective experience to really know when you're "over" it. I always think of it as analogous to getting over a failed relationship. There were plenty of times in high school / college when I thought "man screw her, I don't need her and I'm over it." In reality I was just mad and externalizing it onto her. Thinking back, I wasn't really over her until one day someone brought her up and I realized that I hadn't thought about her in months. It's like there was a threshold that I unconsciously crossed over into acceptance.

At this point in DPDR, I still certainly think about it every day (hourly even), and even if I don't feel any sensations except weak thoughts, I still won't consider myself over it. I decided that I will probably be over it when I am able to stare it in the face and say, "I don't care if these existential thoughts are true", I feel whole. It's hard for humans though. We anchor ourselves externally onto things we perceive as truth. We never understand that true peace is achieved only emotionally within ourselves. We think there are external circumstances which are required to create peace. I don't think that's true anymore.

I think all of this recovery is completely possible though, and we have to rebuild our sense of self around it. It's hard, we have to emotionally process the experience, and it's only partially done through rational understanding.

I don't think it can be forgotten, but it can be forgiven until it's out of our minds. We can continue from where it leaves us.


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## Guest (Feb 3, 2015)

These are good replies and some I didnt expect because what I meant was dp is such a strong feeling and it is hard to distract from it. So how do we get over it when it is so apparent from first thing in the morning to last of the night? It is like falling in love but the reverse since it is negative, one simply cannot distract so easily.


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## WorkingOnIt (Oct 10, 2014)

Maybe for the first time in human history, we can take heart in the knowledge that people fall out of love sometimes. Haha. Hopefully we fall out of love with DP.

I think it's slow! Overall less thinking helps, through grounding techniques and distraction, but I find that doesn't work "well enough" for me. Instead I find myself just less engaged in the distraction, (i.e. watching a movie and completely missing the plot. Except the Interview, that plot was enough of a trainwreck to keep me wondering how much more absurd it could be.)

The fact seems to be that if anxiety let us distract ourselves easily, humanity would be gone. Anxiety demands satisfaction and answers. DPDR seems to me like a glitch. People say it's a protective mechanism, and I think it is if we're in the Canadian wilderness being mauled by bears. Fortunately that isn't happening, but the reaction is the same.

In my experience, the uncertainty of existential philosophies is where the anxiety seeps in. I have yet to know how to come to terms with this. It must be possible though.


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## *Dreamer* (Feb 18, 2014)

I would say, if one has gone into complete remission you barely remember what DP/DR felt like. I have heard this from individuals who have responded to various forms of treatment.

I would say the bulk of them had episodic DP/DR, not chronic. That is, say they had it all the time for one year after terrible stress. It faded away and they can't recall what it felt like. I have a friend who had serious episodes of DP/DR during a long recovery from non-specific psychotic episodes. She said the DP/DR would "flip on and off like a lightswitch" -- this happened to me when I was younger. After adding seroquel to her medications the DP/DR went away.

She said to me, it is now GONE. She is not afraid of it at all. If it comes on once in a while she works in CBT to distract herself.

Each person is different.

Since my DP/DR is chronic and I get no break from it, then have worse episodes, I don't get "relief" that I can draw upon. Others can draw upon that and find it easier to "get out" of an episode.

But I have indeed heard a number of people say, "I can't remember what it was like."

Odd, odd, disorder. But in a strange way, think of having a seizure. It "switches on" and then "switches off" after it runs it's course. A person could live in fear of another happening, but I know individuals whose epilepsy is under control. They are cautious about recurrence of an episode, but don't stress over it.

Also, if you are horrilby sick to your stomach, you can't remember feeling well. Then when you are well, it's as though you can't remember how awful you felt, save perhaps you know you don't want to feel that way again.

Bad analogies.
Yes, when experiencing this, I believe it feeds on itself. Yet having experienced it ... well, I know of people who (what I call) go into remisision and really can't recall what the DP/DR really felt like, and don't fear it returning.


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