# Flachbacks of memories and old dreams???



## Teresa

In my year with DP and DR ive been having theese "flashbacks" to old dreams and to different memories from my childhood.

The memories are not bad ones, and the dreams are not nessesary nightsmares... just vivid dreams I have had.

I have theese "flashbasks" or very strong Deja vu´s every day... some days only one or two times... but at bad times about 10 a day... It last between 2 sec and 6-8 sec at the time...

They often comes when I smell something or hear something that remind me of the dream or memories.

It freaks me out... It like Im loosning even more thouch with reality when it happends. Its like im dreaming again, just while Im awake.... or just awaken from a very vidid dream, not sure of what reality im in. I just feel theres something wrong... And its difficult for me to seek comfort at my boyfreind because Im feeling like im totally drifting away...

Ive told my therapist, and she just said that its a symptom of my anxiety....

Has anybody experienced the same???? I get scared EVERY time it happends, and the last few days its been happening a lot









My diagnosis are Panic disorder, GAD and depression...


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## ValleyGirl

I also have had flashback and random memories pop up from before dp and I suppose that, at the beginning, this was distressing only because it made me see how I was supposed to be feeling and that dp was not how I was supposed to be experiencing life. I've always found having these memories as a gift. Sometimes I can lay in that place where you are half asleep and half awake and just go through memories and in those times I can clearly feel how it was to be in reality, how I felt in that situation down to the last detail. In some way, it hurts but it also gives me a reminder of how sweet reality is and makes me look forward to recovery.


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## BusyBee

I get it bit, not as severe as you describe but I imagined that it was my minds way of dealing with whats happened to me- including the DP. Today, something made me think of christmas, and I just had this bad feeling for no reason, which is strange because im looking forward to it. I think its a deep down sadness and fear of the DP being there.

I was in a traumatic relationship and i believe that this was the cause of my DP. I have recouring nightmares about him. Strangly, I had one the other night which was the same scene but different endings - first I had a dream that i went to forgive him for ruining my life and he huged me.. then, the same again, i went to forgive him, and he was angry at me and not pleased to see me atall. Made me realise that my brain must be struggling to 'file it away' I woke up feeling relived that it was just a dream.

I was put on 'ignatia' homeopathic remedy which has helped relive the feeling of shock and helped me to come to terms with my memories and emotions, perhaps you could see a homepath?

Im also starting on cogtitive therapy, but looking into EMDR. If your memories are confusing or bothering you these could help too.


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## el_kapitano

Same is happening to me... I simply "feel" like I'm pulled into old dream or some other earlier part of my life or that I simply live somebody's else life. My perception of the world becomes so distorted then. Beside that, I have strong feeling of disconnection with this world.
It also freaks me out, but I can't do anything about it. I could only come here and whine all day, but I simply don't have an urge to do that. Suffering is enough to me. I don't intend to share that with the rest of the world, because I know that you can't help me.


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## Teresa

Thank u all 3 of u for relating...

It very hard... I know... and anxiety is the worst thing ever...

Know I know Im not alone... It helps...

And El_kapitano... I can totally relate to your decribtion of theese "flachbacks"...

Thank you...


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## Antihero

i get it,almost every minute.Today,for a moment i thought i was back in 2009!


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## Teresa

Sometimes I also get it very frequent... as u describe... It depends on how angst or depressed I am...

U are not alone...


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## el_kapitano

I actualy think that is much more than JUST anxiety. Anxiety comes and goes. I think that this condition have something with shock. This is brain's way to deal with stress and when we are too much under stress or anxiety, brain simply can't deal with it anymore and it goes into shock state. It is his instinctive way to deal with stress. Some people will lose ability to speak after nig stress etc... it just proves that brain is more than we think that it is. It has it's own will.


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## OctoberK

Wow, I can't believe I found this topic! I actually posted a similar one a few days ago! I've told my therapist about it, and she had told me that if it's just memories that are not bad, than it's a part of life and to not freak out about it. Even if you were completely DP/DR and everything else free, certain smells, sights, and sounds still trigger old memories, which is completely normal. However, when you are more anxious, I think the mind starts to go into overdrive and stir everything up. I know since I started antidepressants a few weeks ago, I was told that part of the process is that the stir of memories and emotions means that the medication is working and trying to sort things out, and it had even given me very vivid and detailed dreams, which in turn led me to remember dreams I've had years ago. It freaked me out, and still does, because it's been happening more frequently, but it will get better, and I think I've been able to remain more calm about it.


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## Teresa

Hi octoberK

Ive also just started antidepressant (cipramil) and these flashbacks just went grazy... I cant count how many I have a day right now and it freaks me out, it gives me anxiety EVERY time... Ive been taking the pills for 7 days now and I hope I stops soon. But wierd that the flashbacks is 50 times worse after I started the medication... But maybe its as u are saying... It stirring things up.


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## Ivan Hawk

I don't seem to get many of them these days, but they used to be brutal in my pre-teen years (go figure). 
It's like I remember a lot of my past, but it doesn't effect me very much at all anymore. 
I've always wondered why does the mind replay certain events over and over. Even events that don't seem so bad at first can just become a hellish nightmare after the replay has occured so many times.

Sure it can cause people to overreact days later, but you kinda need this experience with reacting to more and more situations to react sooner and deny the process of holding stuff in. Often times, I believe the most unpredictably dangerous people in the world are those who rarely ever react to negative stimulus - just bottling it up. When they do snap, anything goes and they have absolutely nothing to lose in respect to fear of their own life in the situation. I wonder why society doesn't see this issue as a more serious problem? I guess people figure, oh, they will only snap later, but the odds are, they could snap anytime anywhere any moment. We all see people joking about it, but god damn does the joking cease when the bottled up stress finally comes out in a blood thirsty "take no prisoners" mentality - which is only natural. Some people call them wimps or sociopaths (one of the extremes), but these personalities still react in unusual ways. I speak of people who have never reacted in certain situations. There's many ways to react, violently or non-violently, but it's strange how it inevitably leans towards violently over too much time. Perhaps what happens is too much loss of empathy occurs and psychopathic traits evolve out of years of bottling things up in order to deal with the vast accumulation of stress that doesn't go away and only grows worse.

moral is, if we want things to get better - we have to face more memories and more situations head on. Like veterans who face PTSD head on over and over to reduce it and eventually put it in it's place (this could even take years, but it's all we got.)


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## Minerva8979

Antihero said:


> i get it,almost every minute.Today,for a moment i thought i was back in 2009!


This happens to me more than remembering dreams and certain memories. Almost every day, maybe several times a day I get the sudden and fleeting sensation that I'm in a moment of my past, no matter how young. It's weird, comforting, and depressing. I feel like my mind is trying to hold onto the past and this nostalgia is manifesting into greater things like altered time perception.


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## York

This is the worst for me right now, it's just horrible. It's not like normal memories as some people seem to think, you actually lose the sense of who you are at this moment in time. It just comes and takes you. I have it with both dreams and memories, and as you said, it's just normal memories, but it's still scary.

My theory is that it's due to us being half-hypnotized, so sounds/visual input or especially smell just takes us right back in time.

I've also read that intrusive memories is a side-effect of benzodiazepines, which I'm on, so I'm trying to hold on to a hope that if I get off them the symptoms will disappear and my subconscious will close the doors.


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## JessO866

Is anyone from this thread still on this forum? I'm experiencing these "flashback" type memories and would love to talk with someone here about it


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