# Big changes when I decided to not fear DP/DR



## glointhedark (May 30, 2009)

Hey guys,

I am writting this due to a discovery that I have made about myself. I started to analyze my thoughts as well as how much time I spent dwelling on my symptoms and was astonished. Overall I realized that I was scared of my symptoms without me being completely aware of it. One of the fears that I discovered was being judge by other people in a different way due to the way I was feeling.

It's really hard to explain but I feel like I am under a microscope when I am in a public place. Part of it is due tomy dulled emotions and disconnect in my own movements. It feels like I am constantly "acting" but I know I'm not which lead me to the conclusion I was being "fake" to other people. I know what moments cause me happiness, laughter, etc. but I don't feel. It was for these feelings that I was afraid to meet new people and explore new places. This is what started a downward spiral for me. I started to dwell on my symptoms constantly which lead me to avoid going out all together. But then out of desperation, I realized something, I and realized that no matter how intense my dp/dr symptoms are, outside observers would not be able to see any difference. This new belief actually drove me to get back on my feet again. I think it has to do with my mild social anxiety I had prior to dp/dr.

It definitely is uncomfortable to go to public places but I am learning not to fear the dp/dr. So far after 5 days, I am noticing a dramatic improvement. I am remaining hopefully my brain fog will get much better prior to starting school in the fall.


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## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

thats great to hear..i think we have all gotten ourselves into a habitual pattern of giving our dp/dr too much attention. But just like people can have bad habits, i think they can have good habits as well and if we start to focus on other things and not give it much attention, we may just find our selves cured..because when you think about it, if we didn't think something was wrong, then nothing would be wrong.


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## crazy person (Sep 10, 2009)

i have had dp/dr 24/7 for 29 years. How about them apples?


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## hd83 (Jan 10, 2006)

Crazy person,

Did you have a traumatic event that caused your dp/dr or was it drug induced? Have you tried cognitive behavioral therapy or medication?

Heather


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## Carlyisdreaming (Oct 1, 2009)

I'm sixteen and i've had DP for almost a month now. I can relate exactly to what your saying, before I used to love being with friends and socializaing and now it always feels forced. When I talk to people I try to say something I think I would be saying if I was feeling normal. If that makes any sense. I feel like relationships I have with people are slowly dissipating or lessening


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## goldengirlz (Sep 16, 2008)

Wow. I feel like I could have written this post. Exactly how I feel.

I wonder how much of my DP/DR was triggered by some kind of social anxiety. I told my psychiatrist once that I felt like everyone was watching me and he actually said, "well, that's because you're an attractive person. I have lots of attractive patients who feel like everyone is watching them. They are!" He totally missed the boat that I might have social anxiety. I feel like I can't make eye contact with people because then they would notice me. Which is silly, because I'm out there in the world, walking into the grocery store, driving in my car. They can OBVIOUSLY see me. So why should I try to shrink into my body and not look around me in an effort for them not to notice me. Nothing I do within my own body is going to affect whether or not someone looks at me.

I wonder if that's why I can't "see" the world around me. Because I'm WILLING the world around me not to see me.


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## Ryddle (Sep 19, 2009)

goldengirlz said:


> I wonder if that's why I can't "see" the world around me. Because I'm WILLING the world around me not to see me.


i know exactly what you mean by willing the world not to see you. i so often want to be invisible. when im dissociated i just wish i had no body so that i could just be my thoughts and nothing more, and my mind simulates that for me but, as is so often true, i should be more careful what i wish for cause in this i got it.

-Jak


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