# Depersonalization after birth of first child (Postpartum depression)



## Angel_heaven

I never suffered from Depersonalization or any illness prior to giving birth of my first child. Its been 2 years since and I am still suffering. I am now wondering if its still postpartum or something much more? As of what i read postpartum can last up to 1 year but its now 2!!! Has any mothers or anyone know of anyone who had this problem? Its really hard to cope some days but I stay strong for my baby!


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## Guest

Angel_heaven said:


> I never suffered from Depersonalization or any illness prior to giving birth of my first child. Its been 2 years since and I am still suffering. I am now wondering if its still postpartum or something much more? As of what i read postpartum can last up to 1 year but its now 2!!! Has any mothers or anyone know of anyone who had this problem? Its really hard to cope some days but I stay strong for my baby!


Depersonalization and Derealization are different than Postpartum Depression. I had postpartum depression after my last baby and it made me have so little energy that getting out of bed was impossible. I was sad, didn't eat well, couldn't do household chore anymore. But it was just depression. I didn't have a shift in my perception of reality and myself.


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## Angel_heaven

tinyfairypeople said:


> Depersonalization and Derealization are different than Postpartum Depression. I had postpartum depression after my last baby and it made me have so little energy that getting out of bed was impossible. I was sad, didn't eat well, couldn't do household chore anymore. But it was just depression. I didn't have a shift in my perception of reality and myself.


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## Angel_heaven

Unfortunately I am facing Dp/DR which has came directly after the birth of my son. Some say it has turned into major depression and anxiety. Is two years too long?


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## Guest

Angel_heaven said:


> Unfortunately I am facing Dp/DR which has came directly after the birth of my son. Some say it has turned into major depression and anxiety. Is two years too long?


Is two years too long to have ppd or to have dp/dr? Are you trying to make a link between ppd and dp/dr


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## Angel_heaven

tinyfairypeople said:


> Is two years too long to have ppd or to have dp/dr? Are you trying to make a link between ppd and dp/dr


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## Angel_heaven

I am starting to think its not ppd because its been so long. But I been suffering from Dp/Dr what I know is depression can have symptoms of Dp/Dr you dont think there is a link???


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## Guest

Angel_heaven said:


> I am starting to think its not ppd because its been so long. But I been suffering from Dp/Dr what I know is depression can have symptoms of Dp/Dr you dont think there is a link???


Yes and no. Ppd does not cause dp/dr. You can have symptoms of dp/dr when you have depression but it isn't the same as having dp/dr.

Dp makes you feel:
Like you don't know who you are
Like you aren't real
Like you are disconnected from your body/actions
Like your throughts are not your own
Like you are a robot
Like you are a ghost
Like you are dead
You lose your sense of self

Dr makes you feel:
Like the world around you isn't real
That you are in a dream
That you don't recognize the people and things around you
You vision (usually) becomes flat and 2-D

With both you have dulled senses, can't process emotional connections, have brain fog, poor memory, obsessive thoughts.

If you have these symtoms, you might have dp/dr. It becomes a disorder when you have these symtpoms every single day and they do not go away.

PPD is a whole other ball park. Yes, you feel incredibly depressed and tired and lose your joy in life but you don't have a shift in your sense of self or the world around you. You are still you and the world around you is still real. That isn't the case with dp/dr.

Now with all of the horomones going on during pregnancy and then during labor and delivery that does set your brain up for dp. Deliverying a child is incredibly trauamatic on your body and if you suffered any issues surrounding that, it could definately exasterbate things. That being said, PPD doesn't cause dp/dr.


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## Angel_heaven

These are the symptoms that I have and it develop after the birth so I guess then its not depression but a disorder? How long did you suffer from PPD? If it is a disorder its it harder to cure??? Also I gained so much weight from all this stress and lately I see flourecent colors of green covered with fog which sometimes shifts to grey fog. Will i ever get out of this?? Also you would say two years waking up to this dream is a disorder? I have no energy, always want to sleep, sometimes I feel things are near but other times far, my bones ache and feel i walk like an old lady. So hard especially when you have someone else is care for!


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## Guest

Angel_heaven said:


> These are the symptoms that I have and it develop after the birth so I guess then its not depression but a disorder? How long did you suffer from PPD? If it is a disorder its it harder to cure??? Also I gained so much weight from all this stress and lately I see flourecent colors of green covered with fog which sometimes shifts to grey fog. Will i ever get out of this?? Also you would say two years waking up to this dream is a disorder? I have no energy, always want to sleep, sometimes I feel things are near but other times far, my bones ache and feel i walk like an old lady. So hard especially when you have someone else is care for!


I'm going to be honest with you here. There is no "cure" for dp. There is no average length of illness and there is no treatment that works for every single person. Having DP for 2 years is incredibly common. I think you are incredibly brave that you've had it that long and did it without knowing what it was.

I highly recommend that you read the "On the Road to Recovery" and "Regaining Reality" sections. Specifically, read the entry by Phaseout_24 called "90% after 4 years". This REALLY helped me. I also am seeing a Cognative Behavioral Therapist. One of the first things you probably want to do is go to the doctor and ask for a full blood work up. Get your thyroid, blood sugar, white blood count and cortisol levels checked. I say this because your dp was triggered by an event where there are massive chemical changes happening in the body, so it could be caused by a horomone or lymphatic issue. If everything comes back clean, you could check out a counselor to look at your life around the time of your baby's birth and see if there were any triggers that set you up for dp. Most of us have a lot of anxiety, depression, or trauma that throws the chemical balance in our brains off. Then there is one major event that pushes us into dp. For a lot, it seems to be chemical (bad experiences with drugs or medications).

Go to the "Herbal Remedies" section and read the post "Read this if you want to recover" by Tommygunz. He has come up with an herbal suppliment regemin that has completely taken away his DP. I personally am taking only a few of the suppliments (I have issues with medications/suppliments) and they have helped me greatly.


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## Guest

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## Guest

Midnight is correct. DP/DR can occur with post-partum depression which any woman who has given birth knows is NOT "the baby blues." There are many accounts of yes, everything from a prolonged state of PPD to psychosis, etc. One famous person I saw in an interview years ago who described DP/DR and an Out of body experience post partum was singer Marie Osmond. She was hospitalized, but got much better. And we all know Brooke Shields went through severe post-partum depression.

For women a monthly period can exacerbate any symptom -- my DP/DR, and depression get worse. These days I'm in peri-menopause. I can go 2 months with no period, then have one, then nothing again, so I don't know when I'm going to have symptoms. It is astonishing how I will notice feeling more disconnected, worse DP/DR, and more anxiety and depression and suddenly there comes the ol' period.

To Angel ... it is very possible the PPD had DP/DR as a seondary or COMORBID symptom for you, and unfortunately the DP/DR remained. Why? There is an indication that stress (and having a child is tremendous stress on your mind and body -- hormones, emotions, etc.) can exacerbate DP/DR as well.

*I didn't read everyone's recommendation, but I would indeed tell your OBGyn about your symptoms. You may indeed need bloodwork done ... hormonal, thyroid etc. to rule out something that could be keeping the DP/DR around*

Good luck.

Hope you feel better and enjoy your baby. I always wanted a child and don't have one. A great loss for me. I hope you find joy in this and peace of mind.
Best,
D


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## Angel_heaven

Dreamer* said:


> Midnight is correct. DP/DR can occur with post-partum depression which any woman who has given birth knows is NOT "the baby blues." There are many accounts of yes, everything from a prolonged state of PPD to psychosis, etc. One famous person I saw in an interview years ago who described DP/DR and an Out of body experience post partum was singer Marie Osmond. She was hospitalized, but got much better. And we all know Brooke Shields went through severe post-partum depression.
> 
> For women a monthly period can exacerbate any symptom -- my DP/DR, and depression get worse. These days I'm in peri-menopause. I can go 2 months with no period, then have one, then nothing again, so I don't know when I'm going to have symptoms. It is astonishing how I will notice feeling more disconnected, worse DP/DR, and more anxiety and depression and suddenly there comes the ol' period.
> 
> To Angel ... it is very possible the PPD had DP/DR as a seondary or COMORBID symptom for you, and unfortunately the DP/DR remained. Why? There is an indication that stress (and having a child is tremendous stress on your mind and body -- hormones, emotions, etc.) can exacerbate DP/DR as well.
> 
> *I didn't read everyone's recommendation, but I would indeed tell your OBGyn about your symptoms. You may indeed need bloodwork done ... hormonal, thyroid etc. to rule out something that could be keeping the DP/DR around*
> 
> Good luck.
> 
> Hope you feel better and enjoy your baby. I always wanted a child and don't have one. A great loss for me. I hope you find joy in this and peace of mind.
> Best,
> D


Thank you Dreamer for your response! I have read and heard about these ppl that went through PPD and stayed strong so I am trying to to the same for the sake of my child. I am sorry to hear you never had a baby but I am sure God will replace that with something good in your life and one thing helping others. At first I felt i didnt deserve my son and battled each day with regret. I had no joy in my life and felt I was a horrible mom and sometimes still do because of the fact my son is getting older and each day he needs more special care. Its not really in my hands and I have taken blood work and check my thyroid many times but it wasnt the cause. I guess we need to stop thinking of the cause and try to find the solution because what has happened has happened and we must except that. The hardest thing I think was everyone saying you are doing this to yourself or why dont you just snap out of it or why r you always in a bad mood. Do they honestly think i love being this way?? Also if you could snap out of it I think we all wouldnt be here posting our stories. I think these ppl need a " Snap and Smack" in the face but if only they knew what we go through each day. I just hope things get better. Thanks alot for the post


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## Surfingisfun001

The member "dreamingoflife" has the same story. DP/DR can be caused by hormone imbalance. If I were you I would get your hormone levels checked especially your cortisol levels. You can do this by going to an endocrinologist.


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## Jpa

I know it's been awhile since you posted Angel heaven but are you feeling any better? I had the same symptoms after childbirth and the dp was awful. I have lost all the detachment dream like feeling but now I feel like I have no clue who I am. I just feel like a walking body. Nothing excites me anymore because of all the horrible thoughts I had about life. I'm not sure if ill ever be happy again. Please let me know if you recovered, I would love to know how you feel now. Thx so much!


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