# Paxil Diary for Depersonalization/anxiety



## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

We'll for a little background I have had panic disorder/anxiety disorder for 6 years. My last major episode was 4 years ago. I expirienced mild depersonalization/derealization. I was put on 50mg zoloft and was on that ever since. Well since about a month ago I have been dealing with severe depersonalization/derealization like I've never expirienced before. Due to a major panic attack a month ago . The doctors first upped my zoloft to 75mg that made my weird thoughts/delusions skyrocket. They then added abilify which I thought made me so numb and had weird crazy delusions. Now they have decided to take me completley off of the zoloft and try paxil 20mg. So I'm going to start my journal with it here.


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

Day 2:

Depersonalization is still a 10. I feel very strange and not like myself at all. Went to walmart felt like an alien on this planet. Still have myself convinced everyday that I'm dying. Anxiety has not faded yet. Sleeping is also bad.


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## marry1985 (Dec 1, 2013)

Maryc1989 said:


> Day 2:
> 
> Depersonalization is still a 10. I feel very strange and not like myself at all. Went to walmart felt like an alien on this planet. Still have myself convinced everyday that I'm dying. Anxiety has not faded yet. Sleeping is also bad.


I m affraid all this fucking pills we are taking, make us numb and this is bull shit. Maybe it would be better not to take them anymore? I don t know. I m taking an antidepressant (Triticco)in very small doses. I m numb, I don t feel like my self and I have dp. How do I know they don t make it worse?


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

I think we have to at least give the meds time. I suffer from severe panic and anxiety disorders as we'll. so the derealization sends me skyrocketing into panic because I don't feel right. Or think I'm dying. :-/


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

Day 2 afternoon update:

Why in the hell did i decide to go to walmart with derealization! Worst place ever. I had a full blown panic attack in there dripping sweat thought I was going to die any minute. Nothing around me felt even a tad bit real. I can't tell you how i made it out of there or drove home. It felt like I was unconcious. I came home and took a lorazepam. Now i have an excruciating headache. When will I get my life back!

I still rate the DD/DP a 10
Anxiety level 9


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

Day 3: morning update

We'll, i woke up this morning feeling horrible and anxious. I did not sleep well last night and had to take lorazepam twice. I kept waking up with really strange thoughts and feelings. I kept checking my pulse because I was certain i was dying (I have bad health anxiety) so far I see zero improvement. I will completley cut the zoloft out today and continue with the paxil 10mg until Monday when i go up to 20mg.


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

I forgot to mention psychiatrist is referring me to neurologist to test for partial seizures. Anyone expirience them?


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

Day 3 afternoon update: I had my eye exam this afternoon which was hell for me to go to because I had to leave the house. I feel really spacey and dizzy disoriented and lethargic. I did manage to drive to my dads to dye Easter eggs but I don't remember driving here. I feel like I'm floating in space. Took the paxil at 2pm without the zoloft. So fearful that this will never go away. How does one feel so detached from reality


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## Maryc1989 (Apr 8, 2014)

Day 4 morning update:

Woke up feeling extremely anxious. I did not sleep well at all. Keep waking up feeling really weird and out of it. I woke up every 2 hours last night. I still feel like theese are my last days on earth and have myself convinced. The anxiety is through the roof. I'm dizzy and also feel like my vision is impaired. I'm not sure which side effect is which since I'm coming off of zoloft and going into the paxil. Not much energy all i can do is lay on the couch. Extremely spaced out today as we'll :-/


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