# Depersonalization: Will I get over it?



## isJohnny (Oct 14, 2010)

Hey I'm Johnny, just registered, and I think I suffer from depersonalization/derealization.

When I was about 13 I had it pretty rough, but back then I didn't have many friends or anything like that, I was a bit of a loner. Over the next three years I changed schools and things were looking a better, and I didn't suffer from any symptoms. At the start of AS Levels (16 years old) I was fine, but then over christmas I noticed my mood dropping and all that. From the 1st of January (roughly) I've been suffering from depersonalization, and nothing seems real. Initially i thought I was just going through a phase as I sometimes do, but on about the 15th I was doing a lot of work and I freaked out, took a huge panic attack and took the next week off school. I think maybe it's down to the workload I put on myself, in that I constantly feel like I should be doing something, making me more and more stressed out. I went to the doctors after that and she gave me citalopram, an antidepressant. I've been on it since about march, and I'm 17 now. I've went from straight As to BBCD in my AS levels (not that good really) and I'm hoping to try and pull it up. I run a blog which is sort of a passion of mine, web design and all that and I don't want to drop it. Unfortunately it's a lot of work and coupled with school work it's maybe too much?

I will constantly feel as though people are talking about me or hate me, which isn't a great feeling. The citalopram has certainly helped my anxiety but I still have this horrible feeling of not being here, like I'm just watching myself do stuff, like a dream. I moved my leg in the car today and remember thinking 'it's as if i'm not moving it'. So I googled it there to see and some paper said there was no cure, although I do remember coming out of this before. Maybe I just need a break, but at the minute I can't take one. I've also became incredibly apathetic. Like nothing will bother me at all. I just wan't to be able to yano, be afraid of not succeeding, or even just be worried about something. None of it seems to matter though.

How do you guys handle this? Is there any way to get rid of it just so I can finish this year of school and get to university?

I've never really told anyone about this, so yano, any help would be useful.


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## Nihil Dexter (Sep 9, 2010)

Go on and don't think about it. You seem to handle it perfectly. DP is not dangerous, it's just a protective mechanism of your mind,
don't pay attention to it and it should fade. Years before I had it for about a week, i thought that i messed up my neck by doing some weight lifting. I tricked my mind without knowing it and it faded.

cheerio

PS: Welcome to the forums !


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## BusyBee (Aug 7, 2010)

isJohnny said:


> Hey I'm Johnny, just registered, and I think I suffer from depersonalization/derealization.
> 
> When I was about 13 I had it pretty rough, but back then I didn't have many friends or anything like that, I was a bit of a loner. Over the next three years I changed schools and things were looking a better, and I didn't suffer from any symptoms. At the start of AS Levels (16 years old) I was fine, but then over christmas I noticed my mood dropping and all that. From the 1st of January (roughly) I've been suffering from depersonalization, and nothing seems real. Initially i thought I was just going through a phase as I sometimes do, but on about the 15th I was doing a lot of work and I freaked out, took a huge panic attack and took the next week off school. I think maybe it's down to the workload I put on myself, in that I constantly feel like I should be doing something, making me more and more stressed out. I went to the doctors after that and she gave me citalopram, an antidepressant. I've been on it since about march, and I'm 17 now. I've went from straight As to BBCD in my AS levels (not that good really) and I'm hoping to try and pull it up. I run a blog which is sort of a passion of mine, web design and all that and I don't want to drop it. Unfortunately it's a lot of work and coupled with school work it's maybe too much?
> 
> ...


Hi and welcome. It comforting to know we're not alone so youve come to the right place.

I found a journal online which stated that the prognosis for DP/DR was good and most people make a full recovery so no more internet this is the only site i go on!

I wouldnt give up what your doing on the basis that you think its too much. I was working part time and by exteme coincidence my boss and i got ill at the same time. She got in there first and took sick leave so i was plunged into a full time managerial position and it was like i was just bumbling through in a trance for the first 4 or 5 months. I asked my therepist if it was 'running me into the ground and not giving me a chance to recover' but she said 'not atall its the best thing you can do'

I am coping and im glad i didnt give it up. Obviously see what your doctor says but good luck in your studies and getting back to good health


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## isJohnny (Oct 14, 2010)

Thanks for the replies guys


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