# Update



## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

Aside from the fact that my life in general is pretty shitty right now I'm happy to report that I am nearly 100% DP/DR free after 2 years and 2 months of 24/7 DP/DR!
A combination of 100 mg of Zoloft, 2 mg of Klonopin and 200 mg of Lamictal a day seems to have cured me. I have the occasional episode of DP or DR now and again but for the most part I'm completely in reality. 
Now that I'm more mentally stable I can start rebuilding my life from the complete disaster it has become over that last few months.
I'll try to come around here more and keep you all posted.


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## Guest (Mar 31, 2009)

im glad that ur out of this nightmare. maybe some of us other will be that lucky. God bless you. :wink:


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## Guest (Mar 31, 2009)

Excellent news. I was wondering what had happened to you.


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## Matt210 (Aug 15, 2004)

So glad for you - hope your new found strength will help get you through the other challenges in life.

Hope to catch you on msn sometime, we can catch up.


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## Surfingisfun001 (Sep 25, 2007)

WOW Danielle that is so good to hear!!! Keep us updated but not too often, get out there and enjoy reality! You deserve it.


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## Guest (Mar 31, 2009)

Really happy to hear this Danielle, awesome. Oh yeah happy birthday.


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## Rein (Apr 29, 2008)

That sounds really cool 8)


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## konstantine02 (Mar 12, 2009)

That sounds awesome!! I've been on Lamictal for a month and it's making me functional, however, I got a rash and am now currently going off of it. Sucks. My doctor is also going to put me on Zoloft, so it sounds like I might be on the same path as you. That would be sweet.

CONGRATS!!


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## Guest (Apr 1, 2009)

The Klonopin and Lamictal and has cured me as well.


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## Rein (Apr 29, 2008)

i think i go rob a chemist shop.


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## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday on here and on facebook. I had a job interview this morning and it went well. I have a second interview in 2 days and I think I most likely have the job in the bag. It's bartending and though I hate to use this, I know that I'll make good money because I'm young and attractive (funny how my self esteem has skyrocketed since leaving my children's father even though he continues to degrade me). 
Hopefully I get this job and then my plan will be to continue staying with my friend for a few weeks until I save up enough to get my own place (at this point I don't care if it's just a one bedroom apt. My standards used to be much higher but that was when I was depending on a man who makes much more money than I can). 
I don't know if I already told everyone this but I dropped out of college (again!) but I can't go to school and work full time and still expect to have time for my children.
Once I move out I'll be in a better position to fight my ex for custody. Currently I have complete legal custody of the children but he has physical custody. At first he told me that he wanted to sign over his parental rights and have nothing to do with them. After arguing with him for a few days he agreed to joint custody once I got my shit together. Now he's telling me that he wants to go for full custody because I'm not "mentally stable enough to care for the kids". Funny thing is I'm more mentally stable than I have been in nearly 2 1/2 years and I was a stay at home mom during that entire time and still managed to care for 2 kids, a dog, a home, the finances, and him. And since I got kicked out I've visited the kids every single day and I take them out at least once a week (despite the fact that Scott and my parents have tried to place restrictions on when, where and for how long I see them which is bullshit).
Anyway, I think things may be looking up for me.


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## Surfingisfun001 (Sep 25, 2007)

Rein said:


> i think i go rob a chemist shop.


do it


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## Matt210 (Aug 15, 2004)

Damn - I missed you on msn, and by the time I came back that stupid message bounce-back thing kept happening.

I think everything sounds hopeful. Don't worry about college - your kids come first right now so get things sorted out there. I'm glad you feel good enough to work now - good luck on the job. Keep on kicking ass and before you know it everything will be on track.

I hope i'm not far behind you in recovery - i'm coming off Benzos for a test drive right now to see how I do without them. So far so good!


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## Guest (Apr 1, 2009)

invisible.ink said:


> Once I move out I'll be in a better position to fight my ex for custody. Currently I have complete legal custody of the children but he has physical custody. At first he told me that he wanted to sign over his parental rights and have nothing to do with them. After arguing with him for a few days he agreed to joint custody once I got my shit together. Now he's telling me that he wants to go for full custody because I'm not "mentally stable enough to care for the kids". Funny thing is I'm more mentally stable than I have been in nearly 2 1/2 years and I was a stay at home mom during that entire time and still managed to care for 2 kids, a dog, a home, the finances, and him. And since I got kicked out I've visited the kids every single day and I take them out at least once a week (despite the fact that Scott and my parents have tried to place restrictions on when, where and for how long I see them which is bullshit).
> Anyway, I think things may be looking up for me.


Oh God, not that again eh. You're not mentally unstable, you had post natal depression.....there are no grounds to remove children from their mother because she has post natal depression so don't take any shit on that score. Having been in that situation myself over custody, I know it's tough. If you can, get physical custody of your kids back as soon as you can. I think you're doing great and all credit to you, stay focused and when you're ready while you still have legal custody take your kids back(physical custody). From what you've told me it's obvious they're better off with you. If they see you're working, if you're doc is satisfied you're well and coping, you're playing an active role as a mother to your kids by seeing them everyday but ideally have the physical custody.....then there's absolutely no grounds for him to take your kids away. I'm sure you'll be fine.

Good to hear things are finally coming together for you Danielle, goodluck.


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## Guest (Apr 3, 2009)

Wicked news, congrats and I am genuinely thrilled for you  
Myself am kinda thinking improvement is happening, hope to join you there soon! Am working again anyway and finding it more than bearable so yay


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## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

I know this is the Daily How I Feel forum but I feel it's easier to keep all my updates in one thread.
Anyway, I have a job now! I'm working for the first time in 2.5 years and it feels great. I've been terrified to get a job since my DP first set in but I'm having so much fun. I'm still DP free for the most part. Still have the occasional episode but they are becoming less frequent and less intense as time goes by and I no longer fear them.
My ex and I are on better terms for now. I say "for now" because at any moment he'll have a mood swing and decide he hates me again (this happens frequently). He finally confessed to all the lies he told about me and is trying to set the record straight. It still makes me a little sick to know the terrible untruths he told some of my friends and family about me. I'm only forgiving him for the sake of our children.
Anyway, my life is still kind of hectic but I'm happy.


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## Surfingisfun001 (Sep 25, 2007)

Good to hear Danielle, keep going strong.


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## Conjurus (Oct 25, 2008)

invisible.ink said:


> I know this is the Daily How I Feel forum but I feel it's easier to keep all my updates in one thread.
> Anyway, I have a job now! I'm working for the first time in 2.5 years and it feels great. I've been terrified to get a job since my DP first set in but I'm having so much fun. I'm still DP free for the most part. Still have the occasional episode but they are becoming less frequent and less intense as time goes by and I no longer fear them.
> My ex and I are on better terms for now. I say "for now" because at any moment he'll have a mood swing and decide he hates me again (this happens frequently). He finally confessed to all the lies he told about me and is trying to set the record straight. It still makes me a little sick to know the terrible untruths he told some of my friends and family about me. I'm only forgiving him for the sake of our children.
> Anyway, my life is still kind of hectic but I'm happy.


Glad things are getting better for you Dani. Thanks for keeping us updated and good luck on everything!


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## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

Yeah......
Life isn't grand at the moment but it doesn't suck horribly, either.
My job is fucking me around and not giving me hours but somehow I still work there. I'd quit but it looks good on job applications that I have a job currently. I got a job offer today for a radiologist's assistant. I'm hoping that works out when I go for the interview. 
I'm still technically homeless. My children's father is still a lying, backstabbing bastard but whatever. Most of my "friends" don't talk to me anymore because of the lies he's been spreading but fuck it.
I had a breakdown yesterday and burned my arm three times with a cigarette. I feel like a failure because I keep self injuring. I go for months at a time without doing it and then all of a sudden the urge hits me like the urge to shoot up hits a junkie.
Fuck.


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## Guest (May 19, 2009)

surfingisfun001 said:


> Rein said:
> 
> 
> > i think i go rob a chemist shop.
> ...


I WANNA COME TOO!!!!! :?


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## Guest (May 19, 2009)

invisible.ink said:


> I had a breakdown yesterday and burned my arm three times with a cigarette.


Im sorry to here about the self-injuring, I do the same thing from time to time, ive got cigarrette burn scabs on both my arms right now. :?


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