# I'm new here



## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

Hi. I've been lurking around this forum for the past couple of days and I finally decided to join.
I guess I should tell you all a little about myself.
My name is Danielle but everyone calls me Danie. I'm 18 years old and in college, although I'm currently not attending. I have a 10 month old son named Aaron and I've been with his father for the past 5 years. He is the most supportive and loving man I have ever known and we are perfect together.
I have experienced DP in the past in small spurts but the past week it has been 24/7. It is the scariest thing I've ever experienced in my life. The past month I fell into a deep, deep depression that I am currently recovering from. About a week ago the DP showed up. The next day I decided to get help for my depression because it was becoming unbearable. I am currently taking Lexapro and it is working pretty well for my depression. However, I'm having more and more anxiety as a result of the DP. The DP is worse when I leave home and go out into public and it is seriously affecting my life. I can't wait for it to go away. I just want to be able to feel my son in my arms again. I hold him but I cannot really feel him and it breaks my heart. 
I hope I can find advice and support here and I look forward to meeting all of you!


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## Catharsis (Jul 2, 2006)

didn't read your block of words but welcome to this ship of fools.


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## Guest (Feb 3, 2007)

Hey Danie,

Don't worry to much about this, I mean don't obsess about it, it just seems to make it worse.
To quote a friend of mine "Its like Chinese finger trap, the more you try and pull away from it, the harder it becomes to beat dp"
There is hope, many people have beaten this emotional crippling condition.

Anyway welcome to our SUPPORT community, feel free to ask any questions.

G.


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## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

I try not to worry about it too much. Honestly, being on the computer helps me deal a little because I have something to concentrate on. It's the worst when I wake up in the morning because I usually have a full blown anxiety attack.


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## Lynch_mob (Jan 10, 2007)

Catharsis said:


> didn't read your block of words but welcome to this ship of fools.


Catharis, Why are you on this ship? If it was up to me i would kicked your ass off by now.


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## Catharsis (Jul 2, 2006)

Lynch_mob said:


> Catharsis said:
> 
> 
> > didn't read your block of words but welcome to this ship of fools.
> ...


Oh what a pleasant post in this introduction thread. :roll:


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## CECIL (Oct 3, 2004)

There's better cathartic activities than trolling on a forum where people are clearly already distressed. I'm not trying to tell you how to live, but perhaps smashing some plates or chopping some wood would be a better option?

Anyway, welcome to the board Invisible. It sounds like there's a lot happening in your life right now, so its understandable you are stressed. My reccomendation is not to wait for DP to go away. The longer you let it control you and keep you inside the greater its hold over you will be.

Also even though you can't feel your son I would reccomend maintaining physical contact. On some level it is good for you and for him too.

May I ask if you've spoken to a professional about your depression/anxiety/DP? It may be an obvious question but really they will be the most likely to help you. On this forum we can give you support but we can't help you in the way a professional can.

At any rate, welcome and feel free to look around and keep posting


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## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

I've seen a lot of doctors and I'm in therapy. However, I seem to have to jog every doctor's memory that I come across. They all say things like, "Now I remember DP from such and such course in college...". None of them seem to know much about it. Sad, really, that I know more about it than they do. 
I'm with my son 24/7 so we have a lot of contact.


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## rk1 (Aug 5, 2006)

invisible.ink said:


> I try not to worry about it too much. Honestly, being on the computer helps me deal a little because I have something to concentrate on. It's the worst when I wake up in the morning because I usually have a full blown anxiety attack.


It is worse for me in the morning also. I don't know why that is, but you are not the only one.


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