# Paralyzed by fear every single day.



## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

I don't know how much more of this I can take. Everything is hard to do. Nothing feels real. Nothing at all. I feel brain dead or paralyzed. I feel brainless. I cannot feel what's around me, don't know where I am, it's like I'll be standing in one place but my brain is confused and doesn't know why I'm there, every action I do doesn't feel like I'm doing them. I can't function at all. I don't want to do this anymore. Nothing brings me relief and everything scares me. I feel completely hopeless. I'm stuck in this mental hell and I don't think things will ever get better. I'm just a lost cause.


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

That is exactly the wrong attitude to have if you ever want to get better. You are giving WAY too much credit to how you feel. Everything that you are feeling, besides the fear and anxiety, are just lies your brain is telling you. You know who you are. You know where you're at. You know that you are not brain dead or dying. All of these weird feelings are lies dp is telling you and you need to recognize that and STOP believing them. Seriously. Every single time you focus on how you are feeling tell yourself to stop and repeat that it's just a lie. That you know who you are and where you are at. Then take your focus and put it on something else. Watch movies or tv shows, read, whatever it is that you need to do to not be thinking about how you feel. It will be incredibly hard at first. You will have to take hold of your thoughts probably once every 5 seconds but you have to change the way you are thinking. Your obsessing and believing these feelings and believing that you're never going to get better is actually making your dp symptoms worse. Dp is very self feeding. It's just like a chinese finger trap. The more you panic and struggle and pull to get away from it, the tighter it's going to hold on and suffocate you. Dp feeds off the fear that you are giving yourself. You are scared of how you feel and that in turn is feeding the dp, which is making it stronger and making you feel worse. It just a vicious cycle and the only way to stop it is to take hold of your mind and change the way you think. Do everything that you possibly can to learn how to relax and ignore it the best that you can. Yes, it will still be there but if you are able to take hold of your thoughts and say "stop it right now. You don't actually have anything physically wrong with you. These sensations are all coming from the dp and anxiety and are not real" and then put your mind on something else, it will become easier and your dp will start to lessen.

Melissa, seriously, listen to me on this. I know that you want to believe that you have some horrible illness and are dying but you're not. There, physically, is nothing wrong with you. I think that I may be one of the most qualified people here to be telling you all of this because I was in exactly your shoes at the beginning of my dp. My dp was just as bad as yours seems to be. You can ask Tommy or Kenny or David or Chris. They will vouch that I used to post stuff exactly like you are now and I am almost completely better as far as the dr goes and like 80% as far as the dp goes. And what it took for me actually was Tommy giving me some tough love and telling to me just stop mind f*cking myself. Because that's what I was doing and that's is exactly what you are doing too. You are freaking yourself out and making yourself worse. Feeling better is all in your hands if you choose to take hold of it. I used to believe that I was special, that I would never get better, etc. But that's not truth. If I was exactly where you are and I have crawled out of it this far, you can too. So just listen to me and do what I am telling you because it is good advice.

*edit* I just wanted to edit this to say that I hope you know that everything I am saying is out of love and because I honestly think that you need to hear it and need to take my advise seriously. I know it's hard to read tone in messages posted on internet forums and I didn't want you to think that I'm being mean or picking on you. I'm just honestly telling you what you need to hear.


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## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

She's right. The more you focus on how bad things are, the worse they will seem.

I know it's really really hard but the way you're going isn't going to lead to the way out of this.

What you want to do is notice what you CAN feel. Do some meditation. Notice that your entire emotional and perceptual experience is all being created by you. What you are experiencing isn't dangerous or bad. It's a natural defence that gets triggered to protect you from emotional trauma. While it may seem weird that you are doing all of this to yourself, the fact is, you are essentially controlling your experience.

What you need is a shift of perspective. You can do it, I know you can.


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## flipwilson (Aug 19, 2006)

have u tried any of the ideas i gave u? Don't go down without fighting. This is a moment, an experience. it is happening to you right now. Now how do you deal with it? We do not corner the market on suffering and you are one of way too many dealing with their own hells right now. Again, what are you gonna do with this moment? Everyone on here maybe at one time or another never thought we would be in this situation. Bad things only happened to other people right? Well now we're those other people and either you become a statistic or get in the ring and go a couple rounds with this. It's ok to lose, but you can't give up.


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## snowcat3030 (Sep 30, 2010)

Melissa_Z said:


> I don't know how much more of this I can take. Everything is hard to do. Nothing feels real. Nothing at all. I feel brain dead or paralyzed. I feel brainless. I cannot feel what's around me, don't know where I am, it's like I'll be standing in one place but my brain is confused and doesn't know why I'm there, every action I do doesn't feel like I'm doing them. I can't function at all. I don't want to do this anymore. Nothing brings me relief and everything scares me. I feel completely hopeless. I'm stuck in this mental hell and I don't think things will ever get better. I'm just a lost cause.


You can get better from this Melissa, you are trapped in an DP/DR anxiety cycle. It seems hopeless but it is not. I have been where you are and it is hell. It is a viscious circle and the anxiety feeds itself. Have you seen a Psychiatrist? If they are not helping find another one until you get relief. Make the Psychiatrist accountable for your health, find one that works and the ones that don't, don't pay them another cent. Heavy distraction is one way to get out of the cycle you are in, make your self SO busy on something like a job that there is no time for anxiety. One day you will wake up and forget about this shit - like it never happened.

Get well soon.


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## TheStarter (Oct 19, 2010)

Wow, Melissa,
I feel for you, there's not much i can say anymore, i see so many posts of you suffering so badly, i guess all i can say is congratz u managed to stay off of drugs, cause if i suffered as bad as you i would've shot heroin already.
Mannn im so sorry for you









Greetings,
TheStarter


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## Angel_heaven (Jun 1, 2010)

Melissa we are here for you and we can ALL relate to what you are dealing with. I feel like this everday but because I have a son to take care of I have get up and shut up for the sake of my son. You are loved and I am sure you have alot of support which I never had. So what i am trying to say sometimes some have it worse then others but in the end we all want to be cured and we can do it. Just believe the best is yet to come.


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## jenni-lilly (Nov 23, 2010)

ustabetinyfairypeople said:


> That is exactly the wrong attitude to have if you ever want to get better. You are giving WAY too much credit to how you feel. Everything that you are feeling, besides the fear and anxiety, are just lies your brain is telling you. You know who you are. You know where you're at. You know that you are not brain dead or dying. All of these weird feelings are lies dp is telling you and you need to recognize that and STOP believing them. Seriously. Every single time you focus on how you are feeling tell yourself to stop and repeat that it's just a lie. That you know who you are and where you are at. Then take your focus and put it on something else. Watch movies or tv shows, read, whatever it is that you need to do to not be thinking about how you feel. It will be incredibly hard at first. You will have to take hold of your thoughts probably once every 5 seconds but you have to change the way you are thinking. Your obsessing and believing these feelings and believing that you're never going to get better is actually making your dp symptoms worse. Dp is very self feeding. It's just like a chinese finger trap. The more you panic and struggle and pull to get away from it, the tighter it's going to hold on and suffocate you. Dp feeds off the fear that you are giving yourself. You are scared of how you feel and that in turn is feeding the dp, which is making it stronger and making you feel worse. It just a vicious cycle and the only way to stop it is to take hold of your mind and change the way you think. Do everything that you possibly can to learn how to relax and ignore it the best that you can. Yes, it will still be there but if you are able to take hold of your thoughts and say "stop it right now. You don't actually have anything physically wrong with you. These sensations are all coming from the dp and anxiety and are not real" and then put your mind on something else, it will become easier and your dp will start to lessen.
> 
> Melissa, seriously, listen to me on this. I know that you want to believe that you have some horrible illness and are dying but you're not. There, physically, is nothing wrong with you. I think that I may be one of the most qualified people here to be telling you all of this because I was in exactly your shoes at the beginning of my dp. My dp was just as bad as yours seems to be. You can ask Tommy or Kenny or David or Chris. They will vouch that I used to post stuff exactly like you are now and I am almost completely better as far as the dr goes and like 80% as far as the dp goes. And what it took for me actually was Tommy giving me some tough love and telling to me just stop mind f*cking myself. Because that's what I was doing and that's is exactly what you are doing too. You are freaking yourself out and making yourself worse. Feeling better is all in your hands if you choose to take hold of it. I used to believe that I was special, that I would never get better, etc. But that's not truth. If I was exactly where you are and I have crawled out of it this far, you can too. So just listen to me and do what I am telling you because it is good advice.
> 
> *edit* I just wanted to edit this to say that I hope you know that everything I am saying is out of love and because I honestly think that you need to hear it and need to take my advise seriously. I know it's hard to read tone in messages posted on internet forums and I didn't want you to think that I'm being mean or picking on you. I'm just honestly telling you what you need to hear.


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## jenni-lilly (Nov 23, 2010)

ustabetinyfairypeople said:


> That is exactly the wrong attitude to have if you ever want to get better. You are giving WAY too much credit to how you feel. Everything that you are feeling, besides the fear and anxiety, are just lies your brain is telling you. You know who you are. You know where you're at. You know that you are not brain dead or dying. All of these weird feelings are lies dp is telling you and you need to recognize that and STOP believing them. Seriously. Every single time you focus on how you are feeling tell yourself to stop and repeat that it's just a lie. That you know who you are and where you are at. Then take your focus and put it on something else. Watch movies or tv shows, read, whatever it is that you need to do to not be thinking about how you feel. It will be incredibly hard at first. You will have to take hold of your thoughts probably once every 5 seconds but you have to change the way you are thinking. Your obsessing and believing these feelings and believing that you're never going to get better is actually making your dp symptoms worse. Dp is very self feeding. It's just like a chinese finger trap. The more you panic and struggle and pull to get away from it, the tighter it's going to hold on and suffocate you. Dp feeds off the fear that you are giving yourself. You are scared of how you feel and that in turn is feeding the dp, which is making it stronger and making you feel worse. It just a vicious cycle and the only way to stop it is to take hold of your mind and change the way you think. Do everything that you possibly can to learn how to relax and ignore it the best that you can. Yes, it will still be there but if you are able to take hold of your thoughts and say "stop it right now. You don't actually have anything physically wrong with you. These sensations are all coming from the dp and anxiety and are not real" and then put your mind on something else, it will become easier and your dp will start to lessen.
> 
> Melissa, seriously, listen to me on this. I know that you want to believe that you have some horrible illness and are dying but you're not. There, physically, is nothing wrong with you. I think that I may be one of the most qualified people here to be telling you all of this because I was in exactly your shoes at the beginning of my dp. My dp was just as bad as yours seems to be. You can ask Tommy or Kenny or David or Chris. They will vouch that I used to post stuff exactly like you are now and I am almost completely better as far as the dr goes and like 80% as far as the dp goes. And what it took for me actually was Tommy giving me some tough love and telling to me just stop mind f*cking myself. Because that's what I was doing and that's is exactly what you are doing too. You are freaking yourself out and making yourself worse. Feeling better is all in your hands if you choose to take hold of it. I used to believe that I was special, that I would never get better, etc. But that's not truth. If I was exactly where you are and I have crawled out of it this far, you can too. So just listen to me and do what I am telling you because it is good advice.
> 
> *edit* I just wanted to edit this to say that I hope you know that everything I am saying is out of love and because I honestly think that you need to hear it and need to take my advise seriously. I know it's hard to read tone in messages posted on internet forums and I didn't want you to think that I'm being mean or picking on you. I'm just honestly telling you what you need to hear.


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## FoXS (Nov 4, 2009)

ustabetinyfairypeople said:


> Melissa, seriously, listen to me on this. I know that you want to believe that you have some horrible illness and are dying but you're not.


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