# I can smoke pot again



## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

Now that I am recovered fully and I do not fear dp/dr coming back I can smoke pot and it's awesome - I feel like I never really knew what it was like to smoke it and enjoy it. It's a totally different experience. Because the anxiety is cleared and anxiety in general is no longer there I can experience pot the way that most people normally do. I even get glimpses of unreality, but they are a whole other quality. Absolutely nothing to be afraid of and welcome in every sense. Pot is what initially triggered my dp/dr - but it had to do with the fact that I grew up as an anxious person and never even knew that it was anxiety I had been dealing with.


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## Guest (Aug 19, 2013)

I can't really see much difference in smoking a bit of pot, to drinking alcohol, or taking prescription meds. They're all a way of dulling the senses.

The way see it is. I'm much better smoking the occasional joint and being able to walk away from it when I don't enjoy it, to being stuck on psychiatric medication.

I'm not preaching.. I'm just saying how it is for me.

Sometimes I say to myself.... "whatever it takes to get through this, whatever it takes." I also say.. "everything in moderation!"


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## Guest (Aug 19, 2013)

©HAMþ said:


> See you in a couple months


Huh??


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## Ruhtra (Aug 14, 2013)

Marijuana itself doesn't cause DP, it's only a trigger. Once you've solved the underlying problem, you can smoke ''safely'' haha.

Still, marijuana is shit and should be avoided.


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## heartless (Apr 29, 2013)

Cool!!!


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

Man some ppl are clowns! .... Marijuana actually fucks with the opioid receptors in the brain which encourages derealization

And of course ur repressed emotions


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

Deezaa, Sperare, ©HAMþ -

Thanks for the words of encouragement. 
I've actually been smoking for several months now. 
Also - smoking pot is not what triggered dp / dr for me.
The anxiety I experienced in conjunction with getting high for the first time sent my into unreality.
I had social anxiety growing up, unknowingly, along with generalized anxiety, and fear of death.

I no longer fear dr or dp. i welcome them. I'm clear. In between the first time I got it and the 2nd time 10 years later I would have dr episodes about once or twice a year where I'd wake up in the middle of the night with an attack if I accidentally feel asleep on my back (a trigger perhaps from when I first got it). So, even though I had gotten over it, like a lot of people have on this forum, I still feared it - I didn't want it to come back. I felt like it was always on even the smallest level lingering somewhere in the background...The difference now is that I don't have any of that fear. My experience of reality is clear. I've dealt with the anxiety, I recognize what anxiety is. I no longer treat it like something it isn't.

There's two steps to anxiety related dp / dr.

1) It's a bad habit. Break the habit and it'll go away. (Anybody who has overcome dp / dr on this forum has done this.
2) Recognize anxiety for what it is - an illusion. (This is what separates the people who don't fear dp / dr coming back).

My experience of smoking pot now is like an entirely different experience. It makes me laugh, it makes me thoughtful, it makes me get really bad short-term memory.
There's even an experience of slight unreality (sometimes), but it's not like my experience of dr /dp This time it's welcomed and it has absolutely no grip on me.

.


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

MissJess -

what if I've released those repressed emotions?

Also, what if that sense of unreality experienced while smoking pot is no longer awful, but instead welcomed and enjoyable knowing that reality hasn't disappeared and everything will default back to normal again?


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

sperare said:


> Again, I'll keep your spot warm.


I guess you will - since you won't be leaving here any time soon!


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

I hope that's true. Dp is not fun. That's why I'm on the forum to help. If what I say doesn't resonate with you, then only focus on what you feel may help you best. I can only offer you my experience which ranges over 10 years and has personally offered me a lot of clarity. If you don't think pot is a useful plant than it's probably because your experience with it hasn't been positive. In my experience it helps to relax and appreciate the smaller aspects of life and the beauty inherent in all things. I made this post to simply state that marajuana isn't the cause of Dr, nor does it have to remain a trigger, if you do the proper work. Yes, I did write that pot was an initial trigger, but more specifically it created the conditions for a panic attack which probably only occurred because I had been socially anxious and had general anxiety up until that point.


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

Just out of curiosity, do you feel that Dr is a lifelong condition that you fade in and out of throughout life or it's something that you might not have to deal with again once you figure out its structure? I'm a changeworker / hypnotist per day (you know, pseudo intellectual stuff). It helps me to know.


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## Jurgen (Aug 3, 2013)

Sigh. Who cares, really? If he ends up getting DP'd again he will realize on his own. There is no reason to exhaust your fingers.


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## King Baba (Aug 3, 2013)

I just got out of a coma. I think I'm going to go bang my head against the wall 15 times.


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## Jurgen (Aug 3, 2013)

I refuse to smoke pot after my DP experience. Haven't done it since. It is definitely a risk I cannot take.


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## optimusrhyme (Aug 24, 2004)

dont do it man...


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

The thing is that even if I experience unreality when I smoke it is no longer something I am afraid I will get trapped in nor is it something that is coupled with anxiety which is what kept it going in the first place. Because I understand how anxiety works it no longer has a hold on me, nor do I run away from it. Dr and Dp are natural experiences that people experience from time to time however fleeting. It's your relationship to it that makes the difference. If you no longer create the conditions or habitual patterns of thinking that fuel dr or dp it no longer lasts or has a hold over you. Again, the intention of my post was to show that it's possible to be free from anxiety and dr and dp. And yes, of course - I could relearn the bad habits that lead to the dr / dp in the first place - but I'm not going to do that. Maybe it's not the pot but your fear of what the pot might do and the reality you give to your anxiety. What I am saying might sound pseudo-intellectual, but it's your intellect that has gotten you into this problem in the first place. It's consciously looking for an answer to an automatic emotional response. Emotions don't respond to logic. At least not easily. Again - this is my experience. Paint it how you will. If anybody would like some advice pm me, if not, move along. The fact that you're justifying the reality of your dp or dr is clear indication to me that you're doing exactly the opposite of what you need to do to get rid of it in the first place. This forum is a perfect place for that. That's why I never ever used the internet to get over dr and dp once I knew what it is I had to do...


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

Sperare -



All the best in your recovery.I would love to hear your perspective when you've fully recovered and compare our revelations.


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

This is hilarious

true...but hilarious


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

DP_P said:


> MissJess -
> 
> what if I've released those repressed emotions?
> Also, what if that sense of unreality experienced while smoking pot is no longer awful, but instead welcomed and enjoyable knowing that reality hasn't disappeared and everything will default back to normal again?


Honestly I would say ur an idiot ... Sure it may be "temporary" initially but don't blame the forum if it becomes permanent !!

Quit pot while u canis my advice


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

missjess - I would not blame this forum for anything. I have never used this forum to recover - only to offer advice. Plus, blaming anything or anyone else for experiencing dr is useless anyway.

I am fully recovered. I had dr once and then I got it again because although I had initially removed the habitual thinking and obsessive behaviour that caused dr for me, I was still afraid of it coming back - like most if not all the people who post recovery stories on this forum do. I used to get attacks once or twice a year out of (what would seem like) no where. It wasn't until I fully dealt with dr properly the second time that I was able to get rid of it for good. I no longer fear unreality and it no longer has any control over me, If you cannot accept this fact in your current model of the world based on your experience with dr, that's okay. It's not my experience, so project all you want.

I no longer fear derealization or depersonalization just like I no longer fear anxiety which was the reason I had dr in the first place - not because I smoked pot.

If pot caused derealization and depersonalization I would consider your advice.

But by that same notion everyone on this forum should also quit meditating, drinking alcohol, getting stressed out, drinking coffee, getting too little sleep, experiencing grief, or anything else that triggered dr or dp for them in the first place.

As long as you continue to defend your dr / dp you give it strength.

Isn't it ironic that you give so much reality to your unreality???


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

No I'm just saying that pot is a trigger for DP ....and there is facts and research about it messing up with the opioid receptors in the brain (which triggers dr)

So I'm simply saying that by knowing this why wud u want to continue taking it?


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## Erik197834 (Jul 5, 2013)

Why would you put yourself again at risk? Stay off the pot man


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## Guest (Aug 20, 2013)

©HAMþ said:


> What are you hiding from? I notice a lot of people smoke weed without realizing that there covering up deeper issues, maybe think about why your starting to smoke again.
> 
> This doesnt just go for weed either, believe it or not most people who do drugs on a daily\weekly basis (not saying you do) have deep psychological issues that there trying to run from.


Spot on! Well said...


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## Optimist (May 29, 2012)

alright, i'll throw my two cents.

If you have truly recovered, then you should understand what OP is saying and not view smoking again as a threat.

Before I say anything, I have to say that i'm no expert to talk about the dangers of smoking pot in general. I also think whatever smoking does is irrelevant to our discussion since we are only talking about *fear* of triggering DP again by smoking.

By reading the comments, I can freely say that most of you guys aren't fully recovered. It's so clear that you guys are still afraid of DP. For you to condemn the OP or to call the him an idiot for trying to smoke again shows you might even not understand how DP is supposed to vanish.

Treating DP isn't done by escaping from it, it is done by facing it and becoming fully comfortable with it. This is how many mental disorders are tackled, such as OCD, phobias, and panic disorder. If you are truly recovered, then you shouldn't be afraid to have another DP episode ever again.* You can't recover if you wish to never experience DP again in you life ever.* Apparently, most of you who commented here don't want to have DP again, and that's why you showed such an attitude for him to do something that might trigger DP such as smoking weed.

I will tell this for sure: he will smoke weed, and he will enjoy it. DP might be triggered or it might not. It doesn't matter since he does not develop any negative emotions when DP hits. If it does hit him, he will ride the whole experience without resisting. He will come off the high and dp will be no more. His life will continue normally. Just like all the millions out there who smoke.

*I repeat, you guys have not accepted DP deep down for you to show such an emotion.* You won't recover if you keep going in that direction.

I wish you all the best.


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

missjess said:


> No I'm just saying that pot is a trigger for DP ....and there is facts and research about it messing up with the opioid receptors in the brain (which triggers dr)
> 
> So I'm simply saying that by knowing this why wud u want to continue taking it?


missjess - I appreciate your concern.

And I do experience unreality to some degree when I smoke, sometimes. But this is what a lot of people who smoke pot, who enjoy it also experience as well.

The difference is that this experience is no longer coupled with panic or anxiety. I also know that the experience will pass and I do not try to understand or figure it out because I realize it is just a phenomenon that is a part of life that I can now accept. It's like the meaning of life. I could spend the rest of my life trying to figure it out and I'm almost certain I would never come to any conclusion. The question itself is incomplete in the first place. I let go of trying to figure out Dr. I realized it's a phenomenon that I can experience and that the only thing that was really awful about it was that it made me feel anxious. Now that I dealt with that anxiety it no longer has a grip upon me and it never arises any more. Also, keep in mind I do not smoke very much at all. I've never been interested in feeling out of control


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

©HAMþ said:


> What are you hiding from? I notice a lot of people smoke weed without realizing that there covering up deeper issues, maybe think about why your starting to smoke again.
> 
> This doesnt just go for weed either, believe it or not most people who do drugs on a daily\weekly basis (not saying you do) have deep psychological issues that there trying to run from.
> 
> ...


Hey Champ,

I personally wouldn't refer to pot as a drug so much as a medicine. I also don't use it to hide from things so much as I use it to enhance what I already enjoy. For me, pot enhances music, and food, and conversation with other people. But, like any drug, I do not rely upon it, or require it, or depend upon it. I use it sparingly as a form of enjoyment. Arguably all forms of enjoyment are some form of escapism, but for a plant that provides more benefits then it does harm - I don't see it as problematic for most individuals. Alcohol is the bigger problem I'd argue. not for me, but in general.

Also - I am a remedial hypnotist. I am constantly doing work on my self and testing out new techniques. My goal is always to become a greater person than I was the day before. We all got our shit to work on.


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## VinnyTheMan (Jun 26, 2013)

thats my boy i remember 2 months with Dr/Dp and i smoked again. I had all these crazy thoughts in my head thinking fuck im gonna fuck up my Dr/Dp even more. Boom nothing happen just had a chill time. And yes i got Dr/Dp from weed but idk it seems like smoking doesnt make you feel dr/dp any worst than you are already feeling it. I feel like this if you think u gonna fuck up then u r probably gonna fuck up. If you think you can do it you do it man. lol its that simple. Im not gonna bash the people saying dont do it but if you gonna do it have a good mind set and not worry bout it that much i guess.


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## hope.is.here (Nov 6, 2012)

Hi everyone,

Pot is one of the things that triggered it for me and I just want to discourage everyone from doing it again...It took me 3 yrs to get rid of DP and I can't imagine risking doing anything to be in that hell again...Of course, everyone's life is their own but to me that's just shocking. I don't drink alc and only drink caffeine really rarely and can tell you that it is possible to live a very happy drug free healthy life without risking having DP again. Pot is So not worth it!!


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

hope.is.here said:


> Hi everyone,
> 
> Pot is one of the things that triggered it for me and I just want to discourage everyone from doing it again...It took me 3 yrs to get rid of DP and I can't imagine risking doing anything to be in that hell again...Of course, everyone's life is their own but to me that's just shocking. I don't drink alc and only drink caffeine really rarely and can tell you that it is possible to live a very happy drug free healthy life without risking having DP again. Pot is So not worth it!!


Yes, please don't smoke pot if you hold it responsible for your Dr. As long you continue to decide that Dr is something beyond your control, pot is probably not a good idea. When you finally realize that it was never pot that made you get Dr, but instead it was your fear of losing control, pot will no longer be the giant that people pretend it is on this forum. At the same time, all drugs should be used with caution. I would never touch any hallucinogens because I don't not find that idea enjoyable. Drugs, whatever your opinion on them, and mine vary, are powerful tools that challenge the ego's illusion of control. Dr is probably one of the worst consequences for people who can't surrender (control freaks) to the experience of getting high (or perhaps life in general). Coincidentally, you gain the most control when you realize you are not your experience, or your feelings, or your thoughts (a pseudo intellectual point to consider) and finally just let go. It's at this point that you can gradually begin to realize that Dr never had any power over you in the first place.


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## DP_P (Sep 10, 2012)

VinnyTheMan said:


> thats my boy i remember 2 months with Dr/Dp and i smoked again. I had all these crazy thoughts in my head thinking fuck im gonna fuck up my Dr/Dp even more. Boom nothing happen just had a chill time. And yes i got Dr/Dp from weed but idk it seems like smoking doesnt make you feel dr/dp any worst than you are already feeling it. I feel like this if you think u gonna fuck up then u r probably gonna fuck up. If you think you can do it you do it man. lol its that simple. Im not gonna bash the people saying dont do it but if you gonna do it have a good mind set and not worry bout it that much i guess.


Exactly.
If you are not fully over Dr, of course you shouldn't smoke weed. Some people on this forum consider themselves recovered but still fear it coming back. Sorry, I hate to break it to you, but you are not fully recovered. I was like that for 10 years after I thought I had gotten over it. But, somewhere in the background, I was still afraid of it coming back. I would even get Dr attacks once or twice a year when I accidentally fell asleep on my back (an unusual trigger that I used to have). It wasn't until I started to do the Depersonalization Recovery Program (which doesn't work by the way) to try and get rid of the remaining fear that I went back into Dr again, but this time twice as worse with Dp and major depression as well. It doesn't help that my best friend died 2 weeks later after being hit by a car on her bike. I went into a state of shock which puts most of the population into a dreamlike state for quite some time any ways. It was at this point that I decided to challenge Dr and see it for what it is. I dove into it and I have never looked back. It probably took me about over 2 months to recover, but now I am clear. Distraction is one method, but it is incomplete. Working through trauma is beneficial, but a lot of trauma is repressed by the subconscious mind. I found that the best way to deal with Dr for good is to change your relationship to it - recognize it for what it is. The old model of psychology is that you have to dig up the past. It is always good to sort out the past, but that can take a long time. Why not disable Dr instead. It can't function without your active participation.


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