# i'm done



## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

done


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## Tommygunz (Sep 7, 2009)

whoa whoa whoa. you can't be done, you haven't done anything yet. dammit, hold on and keep at your treatment. this won't correct itself overnight. you remember who you used to be? don't give up on her. she deserves another chance, and she will only get one if you hold on and keep trying. annie you have a lot to offer and your still in there. don't let this temporary condition defeat who you really are. i could tell from chatting with you that the annie that you don't feel, is still in there. KEEP FIGHTING.


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## DownTheRabbitHole (May 30, 2009)

be done....

in the sense of , stop fighting it, and accept it, it aint that bad after a while, you get used to it.

may not be what u wanted to hear, but this is whats going on with me at the moment, i feel done, there is no point trying to argue with DP or trying to fight it. the symptons lessen when you stop worrying about it, for me perosnally.


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## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

are you kidding me??? accept it? i don''t think so...i don't think i'm in the same boat as you guys....i don't think i have DP i think i'm something else....i honestly think i have a one of a kind deal. annie is NOWHERE. there is no presence of her anywhere.....whatever is trying to be annie can't even hold its head up or support her body. like seriously i think i have some huge problems.

i'm not going to go to a counselor anymore...i'm not wasting time or money on something that isn't going to get better just by sitting there and remembering who annie WAS....where did she go is the problem!!!! and this lady doesn't know annie.

seriously i'm so miserable i feel like just giving up. this is very scary for me. i can't take it...i can't take feeling dead all the time. and not connnected to my spirit. you can't walk around just a body...i feel like i have no idea what is going on ALL the time....i'm totally clueless about life around me. i can't remember 'normal' or living... i feel lost all the time

blaah blah blah...


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## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

most days i might not understand what you mean but today i am right there with you. With that said, i'm hopeful that tomorrow will be different.


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## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

Garjon said:


> most days i might not understand what you mean but today i am right there with you. With that said, i'm hopeful that tomorrow will be different.


what are you feeling like lately? i wish one of you guys could see me in person. i could show you what i mean. i'm scared to death. like just turned 28 and feel like my life is over. i would not mind it being over at this point. i hate this.


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## Mario (Oct 26, 2009)

Hi coffeegirl

For some people life looks many times like a living hell.but believe me,in spite of being difficult to accept specially when you are in a situation like yours,one must believe there is hope and things are going to get better.I know it is hard but try to calm down and relax just a litle bit,so that you can give your mind a chance to have some thoughts of hope.Why don?t you listen to some relaxing music that you can always find in youtube,or just listen to the musics that you like.
the important thing here is to keep your mind away from what you are feeling even if only for some minutes.In my case that?s what I do.

From your comments I believe your pain should be great,but I also believe that inside of you must be that spirit of resistance that will keep you on fighting.
always believe in yourself even when you are in a great pain,specially then.

I honestly hope you to get better


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## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

i dont think that we need to meet you in person to know what you mean. we are all living it on a day to day basis. my life feels like an empty void of different experiences that mean nothing. every once in a while something shines through..for a brief second. that's about it. look forward to those moments.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Destroy your boundries and limits. Do radical stuff (except kill yourself). Do anything and everything, what have you got to loose. Eat alot, drink alot, think about all the beauty that *does* exist, and YOU are part of it. Let go of your inhibitions and set your mind free.

After you have hopefully read this I dont want you to log on to the forum for a while, unless its really important.

Peace and love.


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## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

another dreadful day done with. i may end up somewhere here.

can you guys tell me what you yourselves are dealing with here? what are you feeling? not feeling? what is going on with you?


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## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

feeling an empty void. trying to overcome. feeling different ever second. feeling good right now. things will get better. i can feel it.

michael.


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## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

but explain what that feels like/looks like michael? you are there you just need to fill the space around you? because that is not at all what i am going through. my very being, my presence, the spirit of annie is totally detached from my body. so i have no awareness of 'annie' anywhere at any time. she has literally disappeared. there is a body that resembles annie but annie in fact is not attached to it. so there is no one looking through 'my' eyes right now. when i used to walk in to a room i could literally feel myself and sense myself there and aware that i have now entered a new room. none of that. i dont' even know what i am right now. i'm not a being. i'm very hollow, my face and every part of me feels weird like only a shell. no life whatsoever coming forth on its own. basically i'm dead. annie didn't die but whatever is trying to be her can't. annie is spirit. so therefore can your spirit totally detach from your body and i would say yes. even though i've been told otherwise. everyone says well then you would be dead and that is exactly the word i would use to describe how i feel . i have had the void and the empty feelings as well in the past but this is entirely different. i'm not even human like right now. not even close and i can't even remember what that feels like. i'm scared to death. do i just keep moving a frame around without its person? i don't know what to do. a person should have a presence correct?


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## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

well i dont think i have experienced what you have to the extent that you have but i certainly feel a bit of ego loss. I don't feel like i am the same person i was before this all happened to me, and sometimes i do kinda feel like somehow i'm not here, but i dont know i guess i just keep going around and doing things regardless. The world looks different than it used to but much of it is the same like the visual snow that i have had since i was 17. Ideas and objects seem to create images in my mind somehow like i will look at the back of a van and simultaneously feel like i am looking at my brothers face(difficult to explain). I have frequent episodes of a deja vu type experience that makes me feel that somehow i have already done everything i'm ever going to do. And overall life is bland and not exciting or happy at all. Regardless, i just keep pressing on thinking that maybe one day it will get better because everyone once in a while i have moments where i can at least smile or tell a joke or something so i've just started living for those times.


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## Rebekah (May 16, 2009)

Annie, please hang in there. I was diagnosed with severe dissociative disorder as DP when I was about your age, and I believe I have overcome this DP some days, and adjust well on other days when it comes back. I do find joy, meaning and happiness in my life--but with the ups and downs that normal people experience. The key to overcoming is to get abusive people out of your life, and surround yourself with those who love and support you. Also, learning a whole new outlook or worldview in relation to this DP is imperative. The way I was able to overcome it, or come to terms with it, is to continue to search for answers about your body, mind, and spirit and answers to the key of life. It sounds so philosophical, but the searching and desire to get better is what compels you to heal. I feel ok now understanding what has happened to me. That allows me to relax and feel more connected. God bless you.


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