# Good Christ! Giant Squid Found!!!



## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

For those of you living under a rock, check out this news from Japan...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/cpress/20050928/ca_pr_on_sc/japan_giant_squid

It seems a giant squid has finally been discovered by Canadian scientists. That's right *CANADIAN* scientists! While the rest of you fops were out looking for seismic data, algae samples, and oceanographic chemical compositions, we were out there looking for the real deal...The Squid!

s.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

We're proud of ol' Squidward here in Canada.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

MY GOD! WE THOUGHT WE COULD CONTAIN IT!!!


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## ret (Aug 10, 2004)

What's the bet they killed it.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

I can imagine the scene. Immesaurably laid-back Canadian scientists on a boat in the Pacific:

"Look, there's a giant squid."
"Eh?
"A giant squid"
"So?"
"Er, dunno."
"Pass the Bourbon."
"OK. Sorry about that."
"It's alright."

See, it should have been the Americans that discovered it:

"Swwwwwwwweeeeeeeet Mary mooooooother of god. Lookey there! A space alien!"
"Jeeeeeeeeeeeesuuuuuuuuuuuuus Christ. Where's ma gun?"
"Killlllllll it, kill it Bobby-Joe. Kill the mother f*****"

BANG BANG!

"Did I git it?"
"Dunno. Shoot it agin."

BANG BANG!

Silence.

"You fooooool Bobby-Joe. That's a Canadian!"

And for the sake of international relations and the maintaining of stereotypes, the English:

"I say old chap, bugger me till next Wednesday if that isn't a giant squid."
"Wot wot, are sure you my old mucker?"
"Gawd blimey, love a duck. I swear on Lord Winston-Smith-Gile's bangers and mash, it most certainly is."
"Well I never."
"Indeed."
"Better phone the queen then, eh?, wot wot, she'll know what to do. Gawd bless her."
"After cocktails of course."
"And afternoon tea."
"Of course."
"Of course. Pass my bowler hat and umberella will you old chap, looks like sun again."


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## ret (Aug 10, 2004)

sebastian said:


> For those of you living under a rock, check out this news from Japan...
> 
> http://news.yahoo.com/s/cpress/20050928/ca_pr_on_sc/japan_giant_squid
> 
> ...


Japanese


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

No, I'm sure the Canadians discovered it. They just couldn't be bothered to report it.

Japanese:

"Lik, a giant flid!"
"Ar-soholes."
"A flid! A giant flucking flid!"
"Wheely?"
"Ah, so."
"Incredibly rare and endangered giant flid!"
"Flid good in soup."
"Ah, so. Kill eet. Save eye-balls for honourable father."
"Hari-kari."


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

IN HYSTERICS MARTIN :lol:

Can you do a welsh one please?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Let me think about it for a moment. 8)


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Baaaa.

"Hey boyo, keep your bluddy sheep quiet will you, will you, will you."

Baaaaaaaaa.

"Quiet Flossy will you."

Baaaaaaaaaaaaa.

"Sweet Daffodils in the valleys, shut that bluddy sheep up. Put something in her mouth boyo will you."

Muffled bleating.

"What's wrong Daffyd?"
"I think I can hear a squid."
"A squid will you?"
"A giant squid, will you, will you, will you."
"A giant squid boyo? Well, Cardiff Arms park, will you."
"Get a weapon will you."
"All we have is bricks boyo."
"Well lob a brick at it will you?"

Lobs brick at giant squid.

"Did I get it Gynfyrzzxxxyd-go-go-gough, will you?"
"Great Breckon Beacons, I think you did boyo."
"Will you."
"Will you."
"Will you."


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

Genius.

Especially the original use of sheep...

It is indeed all true though.

How's the withdrawal, Moderator Horton?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Well, you're Welsh - think of some more original stereotypes will you!! Ha, you can't can you! Face it, Wales is either all sheep shafting, bricks, mountains or Daffodils, will you. Or Ivor the Engine. And I can speak with authority on the matter, as I've never been to Wales. :wink: I thought about it once, but decided that piercing my scrotum sack with a rusty needle would be less agony, will you.

It's going terribly, thank you. I'm shaking like an alcoholic at closing time.

Will you.


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

Do one for Reading then. Lots of material there


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Oh god, no, please don't make me think about that god-forsaken hole.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Oh Martin, that made me giggle like a doped-up Rastafarian. In fact, i think that deserves an emoticon or two... :lol: :lol:

I am Laughing Out Loud...Rolling On The Floor Laughing My F---ing Ass Off!

Can you do an Azerbaijani one now...can you, can you?!?!

Reticent: Yes, you are correct. It looks as though it was Japanese scientists, but somehow in my drunken haze last night I thought it said Canadian. Maybe it did and they changed it. Whatever the case, i'm almost certain there was at least one Canadian in Japan when they found the Squid so I think that makes us about even.

s.


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

If the French had found it:

"Look a giant squid"
"I do not care, giant squids do not have proper culture, and they have 'orrible food."
"I suppose you are right, their existence is even more absurd than that of 'umans."


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

> Can you do an Azerbaijani one now...can you, can you?!?!


I'm actually a quarter Azebaijani, seriously I'm not joking, my dad is half Azerbaijani half Iranian. I'll give it a go:

"Look dad there's a giant squid."
"Yes I know."
"They're the biggest inverterbrates on the planet!"
"Did you know that they are the biggest animals without skeletons."
"That's what I just said."
"There was a man I used to work with who used to film them all the time."
"But this is the first time they've ever been photographed."
"Let me finish. He got stung many times, and eventually died because so many of them stung him."
"I think you mean jellyfish."

This is funny, someone do a celebrity or something.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

After having peed me knickers over my post to Tom Servo, LOL, I did the same over this. Absolutely brilliant. Best laugh I've had in 2 months.

I swear this is Monty Python or something. And doens't have to do with calimari or anything, but.... oh whatever. Martin, you're a genius. So we have Marty and Andrew.... NO EDITED WITH "SEBASTIAN" 8)

*Marty:* Sebastain, son! I was walking along the shore and saw a body in the kelp ... thought it was you!

*Sebastian:* Well was it wearin' plaid pants?

*Marty:* No.

*Sebastian:* Was it wearin'a black tam?

*Marty:* Ummm, no.

*Sebastian:* Did it have a red Sou'wester?

*Marty:* Don't think so...

*Sebastian:* For the Love of God, man, was it wearin' rubber boots!?

*Marty:* Come to think of it.. no.

*Sebastian:* Ah! Praise God. Well then, it wasn't me!

ROARING AT THIS SQUID STUFF. :lol: 
I should visit down here more often.
EDIT: Names of two brilliant writers 8)
Oh, man I can't remember jokes, not to mention make them up.


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## enigma (Feb 18, 2005)

Axel19 said:


> This is funny, someone do a celebrity or something.


Woody Allen:

"I'm so torn, all this water gives me the primal urge to return to the uterus, except in this boat, I somehow sense that I'm already there.

"Anyhow, I can't swim.

"Oh my god, what is that?

"All those elongated fleshy objects emerging from the water.

"_Father?!_

"Wait, Dad never had ten penises growing out of his face.

"Oh my god, it's a humongous squid, it's _gigantic!_

"I think it wants to kill me, and yet somehow I feel driven to embrace it.

"How do you hug something that's shaped like an upside down carrot?"

?


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

Tom Cruise (with his PA):

"Wow look at that squid"

"Yes sir"

"Bring the boat in closer, it might want my autograph"

"Yes sir"

"It's incredible, I wish I could touch it"

"Why don't you sir"

"Scientology does not permit any contact between man and a cephalopod over 12 feet in length"

"Why is that sir"

"It will disturb the cosmic balance, you wouldn't understand"


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## rainboteers (Apr 5, 2005)

:lol:


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## Guest (Sep 30, 2005)

George W. Bush and Dick Cheney fishing and finding the squid:

George-Hey Richie boy, I just got me something big. Boy, it's real big. It's almost as big as Texas itself. Yeehaw.

Dick-That's great sir. Why don't you try to reel it in?

George--Say boy, that seems like it'd be a darn good idear there. Cmon big fella, come to mr. president.

Dick--Oh my gosh sir, it looks like a giant squid.

George--A giant squid? By golly gee willigers, wait til I tell papa Georgie about this one. He might give me permission to invade another country after I impress him with this big ole fella here.

Dick--Umm sir, perhaps we should keep this one between us.

George(calling dad)--Dad Dad!! I just caught me a big squid. It's almost as big as the national deficit!

George SR-I am proud of you son. That's my boy!

George-Can I invade me another country daddy! It's so fun blowing things up and pretending theres weapons of mass destruction.

George SR-Sure son, as a matter of fact, I am pretty pissed right now at all the attention Australia is getting. Go invade them

George--Yay yay! Hey richie boy..Call up the troops and tell them to get ready to go lookin for some killer kangaroo terrorists down under. You heard bout them kangaroo terrorists, haven't you?

Dick--No sir, I haven't.

George-Well, they a danger to our safety. I want Rumsfeld on this one right now. Yeehhawww!


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## Milan (May 29, 2005)

Piss funny post :lol: :lol: :lol:

All you guys are brilliant!

Hey how did you yanks find out about our GM killer kangers? We've been training them for the last ten years to protect our shores due to the poor uptake of people joining the Ozzie armed forces. You should see lieutenant Big Red. He stands 7 1/2 foot tall and weighs 250 pounds. Meanest MF you've ever seen. Don him in scuba gear and hell take out that squid discovered by the Canadians...er, Japs, with one swipe of his two inch paw. Watch out world Big Red is coming :evil: :evil: :evil:


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

Just to bring this post back into the realm of serious squidology, this is not quite the first time a giant squid has been photographed alive.
The photos found in the link bellow were taken in 2002 February by the Japs also. The squid was found stranded in a tidal pool. It is dying, but rest assured it was actually alive when the photos were taken. I think the eye is pretty scary.

http://www.pref.kyoto.jp/kaiyo/2-topicnews/news/2002/02-02-01/mega-squid/mega-squid-01.html

http://www.pref.kyoto.jp/kaiyo/2-topicnews/news/2002/02-02-01/mega-squid/mega-squid-02.html

Since Sebastian originally intended this post to be in awe of the giant squid I'll leave you with this thought: The squid in the picture is a mere 4m in length (according to a translation of the article). The largest whole specimen found was 18m in length, 4.5 times the size of the one in the picture. However tentacles have been found washed up on beaches which equate to a squid of at least 24m in length, 6 times the size of the squid in the photos above. Just picture a beast of that size, I mean look at the last photo on the second link, and picture that body six times bigger. Absolutely awe inspiring.
Ok you may resume the squid jokes now.


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

I think if I had read this thread a week ago I could have saved myself from a deep depression. God what a wonderful laugh I've just had.

I bow to everyones wonderful writing and sense of humour.

Anyone up to writing it from some sort of psychiatric disorder point of view? 8)


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2005)

Patient: I see a giant squid out the window. Getting closer. It's huge!

Dr. Freud: Does it remind you of anything from your childhood?

Patient: I"m not kidding, doctor....this THING is sucked up against the damn window....

Dr. Freud: You use the word "sucked" - does the object you're "seeing" have any sexual or erotic components?

Patient: It's tentacles are poking their WAY INTO THE GODDAMNED WINDOW FRAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dr. Freud: You've now used the word "poking" so I am wondering if you perhaps are having phallic imaggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg

SILENCE. FADE TO BLACK

p.s. Hilarious, you guys...truly, hilarious material here.

:lol:


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

Ok, this is all meant in an affectionate manner by the way!

DP sufferer: I keep thinking that I am seeing a giant squid. I know I'm not really, just the thought that I am is really bothering me. Am I going mad?

Janine: You have to focus outwards, AWAY from the giant squid.

Dp sufferer: But I really think I may have seen a giant squid. Does anyone else here ever think they've seen a giant squid? What meds should I take so I don't see the giant squid that I'm not sure I'm really seeing but might be anyway. Am I going mad?

Martin: You are not going mad. Bow to me.

DP sufferer: Seriously though, this giant squid is bothering me even more today, I read lots of stuff on the internet and it says that seeing a giant squid is a precursor to schizophrenia, I am sure that's what's happening.
Am I going mad?

Sojourner: Accept. Float. Let time pass.

DP: I tried that but all I see is a damn squid floating and passing. Maybe its a floater. Does anybody here have floaters? Can you list all types of visual disturbances please so I can check which ones I have got, and torture myself with the ones I haven't. Am I going mad?

person 3 : You cannot control the squid. Any time you think you are controlling the squid, you're kidding yourself.

DP sufferer: Oh its ok, it turns out I did actually see a Giant squid! I'm not going mad!!!

forum: she's gone mad


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Janine and G-Funk...

Standing Ovation.

More, more, more!!!


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## rainboteers (Apr 5, 2005)

G-Funk that was HYSTERICAL :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2005)

g-funk said:


> Genius.


Isn't et


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2005)

* Solip-Squidish*

Squid: WAHHHAHAHAHmuuuuhaahaha!

DP patient: Oh, sorry. I?m not feeling very well. Excuse me.

Squid: Who cares how you feel?! I?m a giant squid! Boo!!!!!!!! Woooolly, wooly, boooly, booly!!

Dp patient: yes, you do seem scary.

Squid: man, you are one sick little weasal.

DP Patient: Oh, that?s very nice. I?m not bothering you. I am standing here trying to realize that I exist.

Squid: I exist! I am a..

DP Patient: ?yes, I know?a giant squid.

Squid: Aren?t you afraid?!?!?

DP Patient: I?m afraid every hour of my life. Squid or not.

Squid: afraid you don?t exist?

DP Patient: Now you?re getting? it.

Squid: I?ve wondered about stuff like that?.being here, feeling myself not here so much.

DP Patient: Precisely. I can feel parts of my body vanishing, or like I am not connected?

Squid: Yes! I?ve had that! Sometimes a few of my legs seem to belong to somebody else!

DP Patient: Depersonalization, yep, that?s it all right.

Squid: Am I going crazy?

DP Patient: No, but that won?t help you for me to tell you so.

Squid: I might be crazy. Think of that combo! A CRAZY giant squid!! Damn.

DP Patient: You do better not to think about it?that?s how it gets really bad.

Squid: How the hell can I help what I think?! Maybe I should see somebody about this.

DP Patient: The doctors really don?t have any answers.

Squid: Not even the marine biologists?!?

DP Patient: Nope. Very little is known about it.

Squid: There?s nothing I can [email protected]

DP Patient: Well, you could take a survey ? but that really won?t cure you directly. They?re researching it, looking around for answers?

Squid: I want help now! I am a giant squid?

DP Patient: See, you say that a lot?and I think you?re trying to reassure yourself that you really are.

Squid: Oh, my God. I?ve got it bad, don?t I?

DP Patient: There?s medication that helps some people.

Squid: Give it to me. Now.

DP Patient: Well, there are benzos, or anti-depressants, and then there?s Lamictal?

Squid: no that thing has a rash with it, and I have sensitive skin?

DP Patient: You sound like a klonopin creature to me?

Squid: I?ll take the whole bottle. Thanks??I guess. How ummm..how long?does or will?it take?you know, um, before??zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

DP Patient: Mom!!!! You want to call the police?!? I caught that giant squid everybody?s talking about!

:wink:


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Germans:

German: Show me your papers.
Squid: But, I'm a squid. I don't have any papers.
German: (Shining lamp into squids face): SHOW ME YOUR PAPERS YOU FILTHY PIG. SHNELL!!
Squid: But..
German: GUARDS!
Squid: But, I'm only here on holiday.
German: Escort ziz thing to zell block zeven
Squid: But, please, will you listen to me.
GERMAN: SILENCE. Squids zhall not be permitted to ze talk.
Squid: Please, just ring up the Canadian Consolate. They'll sort this out.
GERMAN: You vill answer to the capitan and nobody elze. And keep zose tentacles under ze control.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Vot iz thiz, thing?
GERMAN: It claims to be a squid.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Wot is it doing here?
GERMAN: It vill not answer my questions.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Squid, wot are you doing here. ANSWER ME NOW!
Squid: Well, I was planning to take a swim in the sea then perhaps have a lie down on my towel.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Az u can zee, all the towels are taken.
Squid: What about that one other there.
GERMAIN CAPTAIN: Taken
Squid: Well, I'll just go and buy one.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: There are all zold out.
Squid: No they are not, the man at the desk said he had hundreds.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Zhe man that you speak has been taken avay for ze questioning. He will not return.
Squid: OK, I'll just like on the sand.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Taken
Squid: All of it?
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Ya. 
Squid. Well, I'll have to sunbathe on my hotel terrace.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Taken.
Squid: What?
GERMAN CAPTAIN: It haz been neccessary to turn all ze hotel rooms into interogation chambers.
Squid: Well, I guess I'll just have to go back to the sea.
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Taken
Squid: What, the whole sea.
GERMAIN CAPTAIN: Ya. We have zeven hundred u-boats patrolling the shallows.
Squid: Why?
GERMAN CAPTAIN: Because ve are ze Germans. And we enjoy ruining other people holidays with our arrogance.
Squid: Is there anywhere I can go?
GERMAN: You might like to try Canada. Intelligence tells us that nothing goes on zer.


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## Guest (Oct 3, 2005)

Martin, that was classic. :lol: :lol:

The squid goes to Hollywood...

Dakota Fanning-Oh my god! Daddy Daddy! It's a squid. What are we going to do. What are going to do. Cry Cry Cry

Tom Cruise--OK, STAY COOL. I AM TOTALLY ON TOP OF THIS SITUATION HERE. LISTEN, I KNOW ABOUT SQUIDS, YOU DON'T. SO JUST STAY COOL MAN. STAY COOL.

Squid-Uhh, what's all this about?

Brad Pitt--Hi Squid...Oh wait, I can't act. I don't think I belong here. Time to go back to looking good so I can make people list of top 50 sexiest men alive.

Squid-I am really confused. Is this supposed to be some kind of movie?

Dakota Fanning-Cry Cry Cry

Squid--Umm, I know you are a child actress, but perhaps you could stop the crying. Any by the way, haven't I seen you in like a billion movies? Most of them sucked.

Dakota Fanning-Cry Cry Cry

Chris Rock--Maann, this squid is about as white as the stain on monica lewinskys dress....What is it about white people? Whyz they gotta be so white? It's like, you black and i'm white. Whatsup with that man??????? Why aint there like purpla people or something? ::Audience laughs: And there aint no sex in the champagnnee room.

Squid---Ughhh

::Ashton Kutcher runs out::

Ashton Kutcher--You've been punkd!


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

y'all are killin' me! :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## ret (Aug 10, 2004)

You guys have way too much time on your hands.


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## Guest (Oct 4, 2005)

A: Ive seen a Giant Squid!!!!! O my God!!!!

B: Yes I saw it. Could you pass me the butter please?

(to demonstrate the level-headedness of the Dutch) :wink:


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

No, I think the Dutch would react more like this: (and keep in mind I've lived in Holland for a year.)

"Hey -there's a giant squid walking down the street in a dress"
"Yeah, so there is."
"Look, some english thugs are throwing bottles at him."
"Yeah, mindless idiots. Don't they know this is the land of the free and unbelievable tolerant?"
"Yeah, shall we do something about it?"
"We should do, we are the police after all."
"Yeah, but I really can't be bothered. Perhaps we should just stare at them threateningly"
"OK, you first."

Leans out the window and looks threatening at the english scum, who run off. Squid slithers over to cop-car.

"Hey sugar, thanks for that."
"No problem squid lady."
"You looking for some fishy action?"
"Well, I would do - but I'm so incredibly stoned I can't be bothered. No offense"
"None taken baby. C u later boys"
"Phew. Did you see the suckers on that?"
"Yeah, could have sucked my clogs off anytime."


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

:lol: :lol: :lol:


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Gotta Love the Dutch.

I've been wanting to do a Narcissitic Squid but alas can't quite hit it right. Anyone else give it a try?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Narcissitic Squid? :shock: What fresh madness is this?. It's beyond me I'm afraid, even though I'm a close relation. Too close to home. I could perhaps do a Narcissitic 34-year Old Office Worker.

There could be a story about the "The Squid with the Sciattica Ridden-Ass". Mrs Squid is married to a neurotic Narcissitic Squid, who has two bottom holes, and frequents prostitutes. Mrs Squid is gentle and kind, but due to her Sciattica Ridden-Ass can only sit in her rocking chair all day, surrounded by empty gin bottles and looking out her window at the sea where she sadly watches Mr Squid frolicking drunkenly with the crack-fueled female Squids-of-the-Night. Mrs Squid squirts lukewarm ink down her leg in frustration.

And so forth.


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## Guest (Oct 6, 2005)

Perhaps we need some revivals of favorites plays or films, re-interpreted through the aqua lens.

"Three Squid in a Fountain"

"Play it Again, Squid"

"Squid and Loathing in Las Vagas"

"Being Squid Malkovich"

"Squid, Lies and Video Tape"


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

OMG I love this game!!!!!

Ok, first of all http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0367089/

then

The Squidfather

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Squid

To Kill a Squid

Bravesquid

Twelve Squids

The Usual Squids

Star Squids


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Martin, you are so evil. 

You could soooo do the narcissistic squid.

Plays and films, such a fun idea for my sciatic ridden *.

But of course...The Squid of Oz.

Seven Squid for Seven Brothers

Talented Mr. Squid

Fried Green Squid *

Midnight in the Garden of Squid and Evil

Lock Stock and Three Smoking Squid

There's something about Squid

Indiana Squid

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Squid

* personal favorite. :lol:


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

Squid Pro Quo

A squid in the hand is worth two in the bush

Two many squids spoil the broth

Squid is a dish best served cold

The pen is mightier than the squid


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Strange, kinky, romantic comedy:

*The Truth About Squids and Dogs*

"That's not a tentacle you're touching..."

Apocolyptic horror:

*The Seventh Squid*

"...And when the squid opened the seventh seal...silence."

Psychological Thriller:

*The Silence of the Squids*

"And you still wake up screaming, don't you, Clarice...Hearing the awful screaming of the Squids..."

Epic George Lucas produced space trilogy:

*Squid Wars: The Revenge of the Squid*

"Luke...Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father..."

"HE TOLD ME ENOUGH! He told me you killed him!!!"

"No Luke...I have something to tell you...I...AM...YOUR...Holy Christ!!! Look out for that Squid!!!"

The long-awaited David Lynch sequel to The Elephant Man involving misfits, midgets, and a helluva lot of squids...

*The Squid Man*

"I am not an animal!!!"

"But...but, you are a kind of fish, right?"

New evidence brings forth a sequel to the Daniel Day Lewis drama about the so-called "Guildford Four", the presumed innocent Irish Repulicans accused of bombing a London nightclub.

*In the Name of the Squid*

"Oh, for f---'s sake...we're bloody innocent. We've been through all this rubbish already."

"Well, if so...then who perpetrated this horrific act! You tell us that!"

"Hell if i know...but those squids sitting in the back row sure look suspicious."

Chase ensues as squids, adorned in trenchcoats and fedoras, bolt out of the court.

*Forrest Gump 2*

"What do you say, Forrest...ain't life a box of chocolates?"

"It sure ain't there, Bubba. Life's a box of dried crispy squid!"

s.


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

Sebastian, that was rubbish

Just squidding :lol:

I was driving home tonight and the road was wet and I squidded all over the place.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Oh G-Funk...put a squid on it!


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

g-funk said:


> I was driving home tonight and the road was wet and I squidded all over the place.


I just squidded in my pants.


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## Revelation_old (Aug 9, 2004)

sebastian said:


> g-funk said:
> 
> 
> > I was driving home tonight and the road was wet and I squidded all over the place.
> ...


Quit squidding around you two. Don't make me ink you.


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## Guest (Oct 6, 2005)

SqUid (like in Se7en)

The Squid Club

Requiem For A Squid

Squid-files: The Movie

Squids On The Side

The Squids Of New York

American Squidy

What Squids Want

As Squid As It Gets (or: As Good As It Squids?)

Mulholland Squid

Squid-tease

Squiddie Squiddo

and a lot more.....LOLOL


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

:lol: LOL. This is my kind of humour. :lol: Splendid stuff.



> "And you still wake up screaming, don't you, Clarice...Hearing the awful screaming of the Squids..."


 :lol:

I've just checked the Guiness Book Of Records and if we can keep this going for another month, we'll get an entry for the longest running Squid-related gag. So keep it up !!

*Kill Squid!!* - A rip-roaring rampage of Squid. Calamari galore !

*Squid and Sensibility* - "Why Sir Squid, I highly esteem you." Tedious period drama with lots of fancy squid talk and about as much integrity as a house held together with spit.

*Harrry Potter and the Squidditch King.* - Small Wizard boy sleeps with evil Squid King and gets into all sorts of scrapes trying to find a warm and dry place to lay his newly fertilised eggs. All TWO F*****G MILLION of them! He didn't bank on that did he, eh? The little broomstick flying spectacle wearing flirt. Serves him right if you ask me.

*Squidependence Day* - Gormless squid saves the world from invading aliens while refusing to go quietely into the night, and going on and on and on with other ball-shrivellingly embarrassing speeches. Helped by alcoholic crop-spraying squid, Computer Genius squid, and Cool Figher Pilot squid. Also stars android squid from Star Trek, The Next generation, as a crazy scientist squid.

*Squidspotting* - Group of misfit Scottish squid get high on Heroin. "It's sh*te being a squid! We're the lowest of the low! Some people hate the English, well I don't. There' just wankers. We on the other hand have been colonised by wankers. We can't even find a decent civilisation to be colonised by."

*Four Weddings and a Squid.* Skull-crackingly foppish English Squid stammers his way through Four Weddings, and beds an attractive American Squid, despite being a total twat who doesn't have the ability to say 'I love you' without some kind of comedy disaster so lame it makes you want to gouge your eye out with a spoon and drive a tank over it.

*Squid, Actually.* Toe-curlingly shocking English Squid plays the British Prime Minister, who falls in love with a gawd-blimey cockney waitress Squid, and we all vomit over our shoes just before passing out with grief at the death of Squid film making imagination.

*Bridget Squid's Diary - The Edge of Reason.* Teeth-gnashingly neurotic Squid worries about her weight, the amount she smokes, the amount she drinks and, sweet jesus save me, having bottom sex with that git Squid from the previous two films.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

You guys are absolutely brilliant. Best laugh I've had in MONTHS.
This is a gift. This I don't do. This I'd pay good money for!

ROARING.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

I can't keep up with you guys, but I thought of a few tunes I'd comepletely forgotten about:

*Some Squid Over The Rainbow*
... thought I was a prawn so
stuck a sucker in my eye...."

(sorry)

*Wichita Squidman*
Glen Cambell

*I Left My Squid In San Francisco*
... high on a hill it calls to me?"

*Don't Let That Squid Go Down On Me* -- Elton John
That... doesn't sound quite right.
(Don't ink me, Rev) :shock:

I'm sorry, I'm STILL ROARING. 8)


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## Guest (Oct 7, 2005)

The obvious choice


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Squid goes Dr. Seuss...

The Squid in the Hat

Hop on Squid

Green Eggs and Squid

One Squid, Two Squid, Red Squid, Blue Squid

How the Squid Stole Christmas


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

OMG, I just realized...we have become Squid-A-Holics. :shock:

Twelve step program to begin on Monday.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

It was inevitable...with the current craze of turning old superhero comics into major motion pictures...MGM Studios in association with "A Squid Apart" Productions brings us the next surefire summer blockbuster...

THE AMAZING SQUID-MAN!!!










*In this exciting new film, Squid-man duels his old arch-enemy...Dr. Octopus, in a perplexing battle of limbs, limbs, and more limbs!!! In fact, if you're looking for limbs this summer, look no further...We can fulfill all your limb needs and more!!!*










"So...we meet again, Squid-man! Are we going to fight to the death this time or are you going to end up crying like a little girl again, hahahaha..."

"What are you talking about? You're the little girl, you stupid head!"

"Stupid head? Christ, you're lame! How did you ever get a comic book named after you?"

"Put your money where your mouth is, freak!"

"Freak?!? You're calling me a freak? That's hysterical. I put on this uniform, buddy."

"Okay, I get it."

"These octopus arms...this clampy thing over my head...they're mechanical. I'm a human being under all this. Look at you...Jesus! Hahahaha!!!"

"I said "Okay!" Stop laughing!"

"I mean, you're an abomination!"

"Stop it!!!"

"You're...hahaha...the...hahaha...most...<snicker>...hideous thing i've ever seen!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA...."

"I said stop laughing!!! STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT!!!"

"I'm sorry...I just can't stop.....You just look so ridiculous!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!....And in the uniform...hahahahaha...with the little cape...hahahahahahahahaha"

"Stop!    "

*In this white-knuckle thrill ride you'll also see a more vulnerable side of Squid-Man...a cooler side....a sexier side...when he hooks up with highschool love interest Mary Jane Watson played with smoldering accuracy by Kirstin Dunst!!!*










"Mary-Jane...you know...i've always...well...what i mean to say is...i've always kind of had a crush on you and...what...what are you doing? Do you feel sick? What's wrong? Mary Jane, are you okay? Oh...you're vomitting. I see. Maybe if you just let me hold you. Oh...okay...so now you're screaming in terror. Hmm. How about...well, if you just...what i mean is...if perhaps we lay in bed naked together we could...okay, now you're throwing yourself off a bridge. No...don't do that, Mary-Jane....wait...maybe if..."

*And at long last, in this head-bashing, tooth-gnarling, action-packed, "give me a gun so i can go shoot up a mall-full of people because i'm so insanely happy at watching this" blockbuster...we finally learn the startling truth about the origins of our hero..."*










+










"Mommy, the water is really warm...you should come on out...Weeee!!! Life is fun!!!"

"Now Peter, you stay away from the water and...Oh My God! What the f---ing sh-t motherf---ing hell sonofab!tch f--- is that thing?!?!?!?!?"

"Mommy...it's a monster! And it bit me!!! Wahhhhhh!!!    "

"Oh No!!! Peter!!! What's happening to you? You're turning into..."

*Go to theatres next summer to find out just what little Peter turned into...although we have a sneaky suspicion you know the answer anyway...*

Squid-man image courtesy of Dave Van Domelen http://www.dvandom.com I sure as hell could never draw anything that cool


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## Guest (Oct 8, 2005)

Are the Squid?s 15 minutes over already? Oh, he will not take that floating sideways.

?*Squid, Interrupted*? ? Suffering a mental breakdown when his overnight fame begins to fade, a young narcissistic squid enters a psychiatric hospital to try and rebuild his sense of self. Along the journey to maturity, he encounters a variety of disturbed characters who share his new home, a borderline sting ray unable to love, a suicidal depressed flounder, and a schizophrenic sea horse consumed by a delusion that she was meant to live on land.

?*Revenge of the Squith*? ? A volume in the mythical trilogy, this installment focuses on a warrior squid who tries to destroy the world when he feels he is no longer important. Along the way, he begins a spiritual journey in search of meaning, seeking counsel of a variety of philosophical teachers ? among them, MartinV, the bitter, alcoholic office worker who spouts the wisdom of atheism and Sebastian, the bitter, alcoholic office worker who spouts the wisdom of metaphysical altered reality.

?*Sqocky*? ? The ?feel good? story of an aging squid?s personal triumph who enters the field of professional boxing, and against all odds, soars to fame and fortune.


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Revenge of the Squith...quite possibly your best work to date.

Sebastian, honey, I think you may have found your calling with this squid thing. :lol:

so...anyone wonder about this?

question

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What's the best way to cook a giant squid?

Laura Barton
Thursday September 29, 2005
The Guardian

Scientists in Japan have, for the first time, taken a photograph of a giant squid in its natural habitat, at a depth of 450 fathoms off the Ogasawara Islands in the north Pacific. It is 60ft long and has tentacles that can stretch up to two-thirds of its length. That is a whole heap o' calamari. And, now that we know what they actually look like, it can surely only be a matter of time before we start catching them and serving them up with a samphire garnish in the nation's most bourgeois eating establishments. But what is the best way to cook a giant squid? Fry it? Bake it? Make it into a big squid pie?

"A squid of that size would feed 30 people, a whole Christmas party!" declares Aldo Zilli, famed fish chef. "You would boil it. You need the largest pot in the world. Boil it for 10 hours with lots of wine corks to tenderise the squid - and I don't mean plastic corks, I mean cork corks - then leave it in the same water for five hours to cool down. Take it out, cut it up in small pieces - you'll need a very, very, very sharp knife. Soak the tentacles separately in cold, salted water for a couple of hours, because that's where the sand is. Boil those as well; red wine is a good source of tenderising, so use a couple of bottles of chianti and leave to rest in the juice. Take it out, cut it up, then saut? in garlic and chilli and serve with coriander and a nice sauvignon blanc."

************

I'm thinking maybe we should just drink the wine!


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

:lol: 
*Squidshank Redemption *-

A squid is falsely accused of murdering his wife's lover (a jellyfish) and spends time in an underwater prison where he is repeatedly beaten by larger squids. He secretly uses a sharp piece of shell to file away the walls that incarcerate him and 78 years later he floats to freedom.

*Planet of the Squids*

A squid is trained and used to navigate a time capsule and sent back in time, and takes over mankind. Squids become a powerful race and we humans are their slaves.

I'm milking this now. I give up


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## Guest (Oct 9, 2005)

They made a film about this..

Architeuthis

Good film..

Architeuthis is the scientific for "giant squid"..

I would love some calmari right now... -gets lemon juice-


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## Revelation_old (Aug 9, 2004)

Toronto Maple Squids:










I had fun doing that  Too bad we can't win!


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

When will this fun end?

Never, I hope. :lol:


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Revelation said:


> Toronto Maple Squids:
> 
> I had fun doing that  Too bad we can't win!


Pitiful. They can score three in a span of like 3 minutes, but i'll be damned if they can get one on the shootout. Is there anyone on that team under 40?


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Anyone want to do 'Gone With the Squid' ? We did such a good job on the Wizard of Oz. :lol:


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

*SQUID CLUB*

A young squid, fed up with roaming the abysal plain, and yielding to the authority of Sperm Whales decides to join a secret Squid Club, where squids gather from aorund the globe to fight eachother. An existential tale of postmodern empitness.

*Beak*

Giant squid terrorises a beach resort. (Squids have beaks, not Jaws, for those who don't know)

*American Conch*

A virginal squid, curious to know what a female genitalia feels like decides to have sex with a conch shell on the advice of his more experienced peers.

*My Left Tentacle*

A squid has all his tentacles eaten by a sperm whale, except for one. He becomes a very succesful artist using his only remaining tentacle.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

:lol: Nice one Axel.

I think we should steer this conversation towards Skate, Stingrays, and other such Flatfish. You know why? Well, a friend tells me that these fish have identical genitalia to us...proper bits and pieces. There is a whole goldmine of mirth to be had there.


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

For cod's sake, I've haddock with all these fish jokes.

It's a big load of carp


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

If I had a pike, I'd stickleback you with it and make you perch on a ledge to avoid my blows.

Anyway, I'm going out chubbing tonight! Lock up your daughters.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

g-funk said:


> For cod's sake, I've haddock with all these fish jokes.
> 
> It's a big load of carp


 :lol: :lol:


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Axel - :lol:

G-Funk - :lol:

Martin - Are you going to have sex with fish now? :shock:

Something very fishy about your recent ramblings of fish "it's gin-I-tell-ya!! ".


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## Guest (Oct 14, 2005)

Martinelv said:


> No, I think the Dutch would react more like this: (and keep in mind I've lived in Holland for a year.)
> 
> "Hey -there's a giant squid walking down the street in a dress"
> "Yeah, so there is."
> ...


Martin, I had totally missed your post! Spot on! LOL.
Nevertheless, your version only goes for the cities here. I come from the country and there my version is actual truth (and so glad I dont live there anymore).

SPOT ON! :lol:


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

Axel19 said:


> *American Conch*
> 
> A virginal squid, curious to know what a female genitalia feels like decides to have sex with a conch shell on the advice of his more experienced peers.
> 
> ...


 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: 
You guys are brilliant. Why can't I come up with this stuff, LOLOLOLOL. Peed me knickers again!


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Dreamer, can you put those knickers on E-BAY please? Cheers.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Martinelv said:


> Dreamer, can you put those knickers on E-BAY please? Cheers.


 :lol: :lol: :lol:

That one deserves three lols!


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## Guest (Oct 19, 2005)

Martinelv said:


> Dreamer, can you put those knickers on E-BAY please? Cheers.


 :lol: :lol: :lol:

I sense a bidding war...


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Any offers over five pounds ? I hear they are huge great bloomers too with velco and everything.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

mrmole said:


> Martinelv said:
> 
> 
> > Dreamer, can you put those knickers on E-BAY please? Cheers.
> ...


What i want to know Mr. Mole, is what came out of your nose as you read this one? Milk? Coffee? Food?


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

Martinelv said:


> Any offers over five pounds ? I hear they are huge great bloomers too with velco and everything.


Thank you darling. :evil:

I'll have you know they're bidding like maniacs for them as we speak.

Oh Dear God what am I saying. :shock:

LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Needed this laugh tonight.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Well, they've arrived in the post and I must say I am quite disappointed. It seems that Dreamers dirty laundry is in fact quite hygenic. Ney - sparkly. Disolves in your mouth - like fairy dust. Apparently.

Not too sure about throwing the colostomy bag in for free though. Could have done without that thanks.


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## Guest (Oct 21, 2005)

sebastian said:


> mrmole said:
> 
> 
> > Martinelv said:
> ...


Turnips :shock:


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

mrmole said:


> sebastian said:
> 
> 
> > mrmole said:
> ...


 :lol: :lol: :lol:

A giant squid came out of my nose when i read that one! And it was mad as hell!


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Gotta keep this going guys.....some of the stuff on this post has had me literally pissing my pants. Revenge of the Squith indeed. :lol: :lol:

*The Thin Red Squid* - A film so long it makes your bum cheeks end up looking and feeling like two angry dogs in a bag . But anyway, lots of square jawed Squid soldiers run up a hill to kill ****** eyed Squids. Along the way, one of the Squids thinks he is special, but gets killed by ****** Squids anyway for being a free-thinking wanker. Madonnasuid's ex-husband is in it, incidently.

*From Dusk to Squid* - Three squids, ex-priest daddy Squid, Korean son Squid, gap-toothed daughter Squid, decide to go and live in Mexico after the death of mother Squid. Along the way they get highjacked by two criminal Squids and one of whom, who is a highly deranged pervert (but aren't all Squid perverted?) takes a disturbing liking to gap-tooth. Anyway, they journey to Mexico and go to a bar called the Squiddy Twister, which is, in fact, populated by Vampire Squids. Lots of fighting and stuff, but gap tooth Squid and criminal yet handsome Squid escape and, disapointingly, don't have sex, much to annoyance of teengage squids all over the world. And me.

*Full Metal Squid* - A film in two parts. First of all, raw recruit Squids are abused and tortured by outrageously mad Sergant Squid, with phrases such as "Do you suck cod? Do you? I bet you just luuurrve sucking cod.", on their way to the Vietnam war, but not before fat Squid recruit goes bonkers and kills Sergant Squid. When they get to Vietnam, they get shot at a lot, and have to decide which Squid is going to kill a female assassin Squid. That's the sad bit. Some people find that part strangely erotic, but not me.


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

The Exosquid

Teenage squid becomes possesed by the devil, or possibly the soul of a deceased starfish.

*A Beautiful Mollusc*

A brilliant squid mathematician discovers a theory to help explain the non reciprocal relationship between squid and whale. Sadly he is also schizophrenic and believes himself to be a sea cucmuber.

*The Invertebrator*

A cyborg squid gets sent back in time to kill a female humboldt squid who will one day giver birth to the leader of a future resistence against squid cyborgs.

*Squidy*

Inspiring tale of a young boxing squid's rise to the top. During fights he alternates between all ten tentacle fighting preferences.


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Excellent.


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## Guest (Oct 27, 2005)

*101 Legs*

A mutated squid is hunted down by Cruella D'Shoal so that she can turn him into a coat. Or 50 pairs of socks. And a spare.


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

No that would be '80 arms and 21 Tentacles'. Squids have eight arms and two tentacles, therefore this mutated squid has had his appendages multiplied by 10, plus an extra tentacle.
Please make sure you thoroughly research your squid posts in future.


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## Guest (Oct 29, 2005)

Axel19 said:


> No that would be '80 arms and 21 Tentacles'. Squids have eight arms and two tentacles, therefore this mutated squid has had his appendages multiplied by 10, plus an extra tentacle.
> Please make sure you thoroughly research your squid posts in future.


 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

May I respond equally as eloquently?










:lol:


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

:lol: :lol: :lol:

That's right stick to what you know.

*Super-Squid Me*

Light hearted attack on the underwater jellyfish food industry. A Texan squid decides to go on a thirty 'jellyfish diet' day diet. Almost dies of starvation.

Ok now this is just getting silly.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

You want silly? I know none of you will believe this but, I had a dream last night that involved Angelina Jolie and some squid. Honestly. I can't fit all the pieces together, but I think the basic theme was that she was an 'expert' squid person, who swam with giant squids and made them friendly...like a squid version of the 'Horse Whisperer'. Someone died too. A bloke with a moustache. In the course of the dream, the Squid kind of morphed into gigantic purple sticky, jelly kind of things.

And that's the god's honest truth.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

> Teenage squid becomes possesed by the devil


Axel19, please get your exorcism-squid facts right before posting on this board. In actuality, in the book 'The Exorcist' (which I presume you are taking your squid-related facts from), the girl is not possessed by the devil but by a 'Demon'. There is a difference. And this demon's name is 'Pazuzzu', son of the South-West wind. Oh, and she wasn't teenage, she was 12. Deary deary deary me. How many mistakes can one man make in one sentence? So please try harder next time. Sigh. You just can't get the staff nowadays.


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

Sticking up for your mate mrmole, eh Martin, that's just racist!

Oh, and this thread is about squids not demonic possesion, so my mistake was well within the limits of academic qualification for this thread.


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

*Harry Squatter*

A movie conceived when a bored dp'er tried to come up with a squid version of Harry Potter, but inadvertently invented a movies about squatters.


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## Guest (Oct 31, 2005)

Axel19 said:


> *Harry Squatter*
> 
> A movie conceived when a bored dp'er tried to come up with a squid version of Harry Potter, but inadvertently invented a movies about squatters.


 :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

*Trainsquatting*

A group of Scottish smackheads...sleep on a train. The End.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

ROARING. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

When I want a laugh, here it is.

"The Exorsquid", LOLOLOLOLOL

I thought of a title, but don't know what to do with it....

*The PRawn Broker*
Is that the titile of a film, LOLOLOL.

Song, "Just Another Mollusk Monday" (The Bangles)LOLOL.

I just can't come up with the brilliant stuff y'all do.


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## Milan (May 29, 2005)

Mr Mole is that your finger? It's very straight.

I wish I had Angelina Jolie dreams


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

> I wish I had Angelina Jolie dreams


So do I. I mean, I wish I could have a dream about beautiful women without my brain having to spoil it by involving squid or something horrible. It's not fair. I had a dream once that I kissed Natalie Portman, but I gagged and run away because she had a mouthful of pebbles. How unfair is that? Oh, and let's not forget the time I dreamt about slowly undressing a flame-hairded goddess, only to find that she had more hair on her legs than a bear.  I think this might shed some light on the state of my unconscious.

Sigh, anyway, back to work:

*Requiem for a Squid* - Magical tale especially aimed at young squids aged 5 - 10 years old, about a handsome squid and his beautiful girlfriend squid, who snort lots and lots and lots of fairy power up their squid-snouts to make them very happy, but end up really really fucked up. Handsome squid has to chop one of his tentacles off, and beautiful squid has to go on the game to satisfy her fairy dust habit. Meanwhile, handsome squid's mother goes bonkers after taking prescription fairy dust, because she wants to lose weight and fit in a red dress. Fun for all the family.


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2005)

Milan said:


> Mr Mole is that your finger? It's very straight.


  

Nope. Another Google image search :lol:


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

> Another Google image search


What exactly _did_ you type in to Google to get that picture? :shock:


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2005)

Martinelv said:


> > Another Google image search
> 
> 
> What exactly _did_ you type in to Google to get that picture? :shock:


The same thing as this


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2005)

> Requiem for a Squid - Magical tale especially aimed at young squids aged 5 - 10 years old, about a handsome squid and his beautiful girlfriend squid, who snort lots and lots and lots of fairy power up their squid-snouts to make them very happy, but end up really really f--- up. Handsome squid has to chop one of his tentacles off, and beautiful squid has to go on the game to satisfy her fairy dust habit. Meanwhile, handsome squid's mother goes bonkers after taking prescription fairy dust, because she wants to lose weight and fit in a red dress. Fun for all the family.


How ironic that you mention movie stars in dreams and then this movie(or parody of it, whatever.) I had a dream I was making out with Jennifer Connelly last night. She looked mucho sexy and did not have pebbles in her mouth. If reality could only resemble our dreams sometimes :evil: :evil:


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

She's rather attractive is that Jennifer Connelly. Lucky you. Bastard. If she was in my dream she probably turn into *you.* No offence.


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2005)

People have had such dreams about me, and were later committed to a mental institution, or given large dosages of anti psychotics. I sincerely hope you do not have such a dream. The repercussions of dreaming about me in that context are: tramau, brain damage, a lifetime of terror, no hope of recovering.


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## Guest (Nov 3, 2005)

I can honestly say that I have never seen so many cleverly funny people in one place in all my life. It just makes me wish I could visit the board more often, to see this, seriously. You guys could brighten any dper's day

Cheers


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## Milan (May 29, 2005)

What the Squid!!!

Sorry but I had to resurrect this thread again:

Check out the giant frozen squid that is on display at the Melbourne aquarium:
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5744,17628147%5E30417,00.html

Just when you thought there you were all squidded out


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Holy Moly ! What a Squid ! :shock:

Are you going to be able to go see it and give us a Squid report?

Here's a little receipe for the holidays. Sounds yummy, huh? And please, this receipe does ask that your squid be dressed. :lol:

Christmas Eve Special Squid 
Ingredients
2 pounds squid, dressed (head and tentacles separated, mantle removed and the pen discarded)
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 onion, finely chopped
3 tablespoons olive oil
2 cups canned peeled tomatoes
1/2 cup water
Salt and pepper
12 Italian black olives, pitted and chopped
1/4 cup raisins
2 tablespoons pine nuts

Instructions
Cut the squid into small pieces and wash well. In a medium saucepan, saute the garlic and onion in the olive oil until golden brown. Add the squid, tomatoes, water and season with salt and pepper. Cover the pan and simmer for 10 minutes.

Stir in the olives, raisins and pine nuts, added extra of any if you wish. Cover again and simmer for 10 more minutes until squid is tender. Arrange slices of crusty Italian bread in serving bowls and spoon the squid and sauce over the bread.

Yield: 6 servings


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

God bless you, Milan, for resurrecting this thread.

Isn't there a politically correct way of referring to a squid like that, other than using the rather derogatory "monsterous" adjective?


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

Best thread ever!


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## Milan (May 29, 2005)

Sorry Terri* but I won't be making the trek to Melbourne any time soon.

Maybe one of our fellow DP'ers who reside in Melbourne can go and check out the exhibition, take some snaps and post them on this thread. Any takers - Shytiger, don't you live in Melbourne?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

I had a dream about a Jellyfish last night. It's name was Graeme and I wore it as a hat.


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## sleepingbeauty (Aug 18, 2004)

..


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## sleepingbeauty (Aug 18, 2004)

martin, i found some pictures of you. :lol:


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