# Is it even possible...



## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

To get better? To get out of this hell? I can't do this anymore. I'm sinking deeper and deeper. I can't stop thinking. I can't stop thinking about what my life has become. I feel like such a failure to everyone but most of all I feel like a failure to myself. I have so many regrets now that I'm not well. I truly and honestly believe I have the worst DR possible on this whole board. I'd like to know iof some severe cases from others and how they got better. I'm sorry for all my ridiculous and upsetting posts. I really feel like this is it. I feel like I'm fucking dying. My mind is completely disabled. I dream about what my life used to be like and wish to go back in time. Yes, I was always sensitive, very emotional, had my fare share of cries every now and then and always had the tendency to over think everything. I've always been a deep thinker and now all I can think about is, what tomorrow is going to be like or the next few months, years? I don't want this piece of shit ruining my life anymore. I need help with everything. I need someone with me when I'm outside because I don't know wherei I'm going or where I am. I'm in my house, my own fucking house and standing in one simple place does not feel real. I've lost my senses of what feels real. This is the worst torture in the world. To loose touch with what you're doing and wheee you are. I havent seen my friends in two months because everything scares me. Even talking to someone face to face is so incredibky hard and i feel so lost and disoriented. It's like my brain cant handle anything anymore. I've lost my independence, my free spirit, I feel completely fucked. Getting dressed is hard to do, my room does not feel like my room, nothing feels like anything, it's a big panic and hell to even wake up in the morning because i cant feel anything anymore. I want my life back. DR is seriously a cancer of the mind. EVERYTHING is so HARD.

I HATE THIS.


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

What do you want us to say Melissa? What exactly is it that you are looking for? Myself and others have replied to you before and told you how crippling our dr was and that we have gotten better since then. If you are looking for loads of fully recovered people to tell you it's going to be fine, you aren't going to find that here because the recovered people leave this place and don't come back. Those of us who can have said all that we can. What is it that we aren't saying that you want to hear?


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## nabber (Feb 13, 2009)

How long have you have you had dpd? Do you take any meds?


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

I've had DR for 6 months.


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## flat (Jun 18, 2006)

I used to wake up incredibly disoriented but it usually went away as I became more awake. Remember this is just runaway anxiety. Try some simple health store supplements if you can:

1) melatonin (I prefer the drops) - helps you get needed rest

2) B complex vitamins - has a calming effect

3) chamomile tea (with valerian root if possible) - has a calming effect

If you are on any meds make an appointment with your doctor right away so he can figure out what's going on. Side effects from certain meds can be worse than the disease itself. Plead with your parents that you need help right away!


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## flat (Jun 18, 2006)

I read something about the herb Holy Basil that it balances cortisol levels in the body. Too much cortisol can cause a lot of anxiety that may be responsible for your dr. Try some holy basil tea. You can find it anywhere and it's cheap. It may also come in tablet form too. But the tea really helps.


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

Melissa, it has just been 6months. Give it time. I am sure everything will work out for you as well.

Do you have DP as well?


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

No, I just have DR.

I'm sorry to all of you for being so annoying.







this is the only place that can give me advice. I owe you guys a sincere apology. I'm just suffering unberablr right now.


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## Gypsy85 (Sep 23, 2010)

It is ok Melissa. Complain, cry and be as annoying as you want to. This here is the right place for it. If not here, where else???

It is just that we can only say the same things again







New research hasn't been done so far, so we can just keep on repeating until new methods are available.

I am really sorry for you, but I can -again- only say: Hang in there, better times will come


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## Strangerdanger (Oct 3, 2010)

just take it one moment at a time. I still feel pretty horrible most of the time, for instance right now while typing this everything seems completely unreal and strange and i don't even know who i am. BUT when I think back to a few months ago when I thought I was going CRAZY and had no idea what was wrong with me, I can think I am at lease a little less of a mess than I was then. you aren't going to feel "good" anytime soon, but you will start start to feel slightly less horrible than you did when this first came about. And that's a step! As long as you keep trying keep forcing yourself to do things that are going to help you each moment at a time. You can do it girl!


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## simplynothing (Aug 23, 2009)

How did you get it,was it drug induced?


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## Melissa_Z (Sep 29, 2010)

Stress.


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## simplynothing (Aug 23, 2009)

How did you get it,was it drug induced?


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## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

Melissa_Z said:


> Stress.


If stress got you into it, do you think stressing about it is going to get you out?

I say this, but I've been stressing out to the max and I know how hard it is! It's been nearly 2 years for me now and sometimes it feels like I'm making reverse progress!

I do think that acceptance is the only way you can get out of this. Deep acceptance that penetrates the very fabric of your being. Acceptance right down to your very core, to your past, you present. Everything.


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