# How do I just... accept myself for who I am?



## Healy787 (Jan 18, 2010)

I don't know how to just accept and love myself. All I do every second of every day is try to fix myself. Fix how I think so negatively. Fix my friggin dp/dr. Fix my acne. Improve my body. Get more sleep so I don't look tired. Fix my hair. Make sure I'm wearing the write thing. Fix my usage of time.. make sure I spend it well. Fix how I walk. Fix how I do this. How I do that...

I am having a really really hard time with this. I don't know how to just accept myself. I have accepted that I have problems with how I look and how I act, but I feel like the only thing to do is improve them. I am being completely serious when i say all I do is fix... all day. Unless I am distracted by something. So I force distractions upon myself. Computer, tv, working out, music, school, work. I swear I cannot just sit still and leave myself to my thoughts cus then it's just fix fix fix... dp dp dp. Don't think this. Okay, remember this, it's okay to do this. It's not okay to think that. Think positive. AGHH I swear it's driving me nuts.

It is not normal. I just really want to accept myself, but to accept yourself you must love yourself. I don't feel loved and the only way to feel loved is to be loved by others. And the only way to feel loved by others is to love yourself. It's like I'm in a freakin never ending cycle of doom.

The only solution I have come up with is fix fix fix. Improve. Improve. Improve.... How do I just accept!? =[ This is soo soo hard.

I wish I just didnt have to think, cus its all I do.

(p.s. I don't think dp is always from anxiety in the form of fear. I think mine is from anxiety in the form of insecurity and wanting love/acceptance) =[.. .never good enough


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## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

Self acceptance for me has been about admitting that I cannot control the negative thoughts I have about myself. Instead I have accepted them as a result of a truly horrific childhood. This way you are not fighting the way you have become but instead have sympathy for yourself accepting the reasons for why you have become the way you are.


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## Pablo (Sep 1, 2005)

I am the same way, some people suggest mindfulness so you just observe how you are doing things without trying to change anything, although this doesn't work so well for me as I get caught up in non acceptance too easily so I try to practice active forms of relaxation like Chinese Qigong so my mind can't interfere too much


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