# An enormous vat



## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Yes...that's right. An enormous vat.

As I was dragging myself out of my apartment this morning at the ungodly hour of 7:45 am, cursing the fact that I wasn't a monarch of some sort so I wouldn't have to involve myself with such absurdities as going out to work for an entire day, I noticed a certain something in the hallway that quite clearly did not belong there.

A vat. An enormous vat.

Now, for those of you who aren't 100% sure what a "vat" is, I'm providing a photo, which I obtained from the handy google pictures webpage, after cleverly typing "vat" in the search field:










Now, the vat which I saw in the hallway was (mercifully) not quite as large as this one...nor was it on its side...nor made of alluminum or stainless steel or whatever other crazy kind of molecular combo this thing is made of...nor was it filled with milk, as the one in the picture allegedly is.

In fact, the vat in my hallway looks as though it's made of some sort of cardboard type material with metal casing or something on top of it. Like a gigantic Pringles container...but much more nefarious.

The hallway in my apartment building is quite barren. It actually resembles the hallway in the Overlook Hotel in The Shining. I shall provide a picture of that also:










Clearly, there isn't always a young boy with telepathic abilities crawling along the floor...so just imagine that hallway without the boy, a little less classy looking, all kinds of ugly discolouration plaguing the walls, a roof that looks like someone spilled a gallon of coffee on it, bland carpeting, and a giant, conspicuous vat sitting right beside one of the doors.

I don't really know my neighbours. I suspect the gentleman across the way from me thinks that my roommate and I are homosexuals. Everytime I'm around him I try to play on his suspicion by smiling at him suggestively and making constant references to Sex and the City. But the vat is two doors down from him and I don't even know who lives there.

Let me again make it clear. This vat almost takes up half the hallway. Like, if two people were walking hand in hand down the hallway, they would have to unclasp for a few moments while they made their way around the vat. Yes, it's that big.

It was more of a surprise when I noticed it this morning. I thought I was still dreaming and cursed myself for having wandered into such a banal dreamscape where giant, unadorned vats sat motionless in my hallway rather than having sexy, unclothed women laying motion-filled on my bed. But after shaking my head, I looked more closely. It was real. I dared not touch it. It was far too austere and important-looking. There were no markings on it other than some sort of shipping receipt which didn't even look like it was in english (although that was not at all out of the ordinary in this neighbourhood). It was simply there. Unexplained. Unrepentent. Like the monolithic structure in Kubrick's 2001.

I had no idea what to do. So I went to work, and comforted myself in the tedium of the every day.

I had almost forgotten about the vat by the time I returned home. I was tired, hungry, and dying for a drink. But it all came back like a screaming nightmare when I whipped up the stairs and turned onto my hallway. It was still there. In the exact same place.

Now, I'm not sure what disturbs me more. The fact that no one else seems to mind the fact that a giant vat is sitting in the middle of the hallway with seemingly no explanation as to how it came to get there, or that the people to whom this vat has been shipped, seem indifferent to its presence right in front of their door. Have they not left their apartment all day? Is it not even theirs, and they're simply waiting for someone else to address the whole awkward situation?

I have no idea how to proceed from this point and will likely work out some sort of strategy vis a vis the vat, once my roommate returns home.

I would upload a photo of said vat but I have no idea how it will react to having its picture taken.

I'm scared. And I pray it isn't there tomorrow.

s.


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## Guest (Oct 23, 2008)

WOW I would absoluley love a hallway like in that picture even with the psychic boy crawling up and down it and if I couldnt have him included I would just crawl up and down it myself to make it look creepy....its awesome.

LOL,its just a vat haha but I love the way you tell it,can you not knock on the neighbours doors and ask them W T F a vat is doing randomly occupying the hallway?....What would you do if the creepy psychic boy from the shining opened the neighbours door...then you would be scared.

Spirit.


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## Rein (Apr 29, 2008)

Yeah you have writing talent, but sometimes weird things happen  Yesterday there lay suddenly a metal shoe-horn in my mailbox :shock: and i don`t get it how it comes there and who puts it there and why :?


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## Guest (Oct 23, 2008)

What is a shoe horn Rein?..a horse shoe?....I doubt you mean a horse shoe was in your letter box because that would be weird. :lol: Maybe the little elf helpers put it there ....or the pixys..


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## PPPP (Nov 26, 2006)

:shock:


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## Surfingisfun001 (Sep 25, 2007)

Even if you hate the fact that there is a huge vat in your hallway I had a great time reading your story. In fact I don't think I have sat down and read a story or book as long as your post in a long long time. Can you write more creative stories?


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## Rein (Apr 29, 2008)

Yeah keep us updated. How`s the vat doing now?


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

Rein said:


> Yeah keep us updated. How`s the vat doing now?


Okay. Seriously. You aren't going to believe this. I have to admit that the whole original posting was a bit tongue-in-cheek. I mean, there was an enormous vat sitting in the middle of my hallway and all, but I figured it must have some sort of arcane purpose that was simply beyond my capabilities to grasp at the time. However, this is weird...When I arrived home that night, and after I had posted on here, I helped myself to a couple of Guinesses I had laying about in the fridge, and casually took care of some administrative internet duties (checking email, facebook, etc.) When my roommate did arrive home, I strolled out to greet him, and said, "Hey. Have any idea what the hell that huge vat like thing is in the middle of the hallway?" His reply, other than to look at me like I was a frothing-at-the-mouth maniac (which, it should be noted, is how he usually looks at me in any case), was, "What vat? What the hell is a vat?"

Sebastian: "A vat. A large barrel type thing that's usually used to store liquids or gases."
Roomate: "I've never heard them called "vats" before. What sort of shape are they?"
Sebastian: "Cylindrical. Oblong. I don't know. I think they can be different sizes. What the hell difference does it make?"
Roomate: "Well, I have to know what you're referring to, so I know if I've seen one or not."
Sebastian: "It's the enormous thing in the middle of the hallway that you likely almost bumped into on your way to the apartment. How many large obstacles are there out there?"
Roomate: "There was nothing out there. Are you feeling all right?"

Frustrated, I yanked open the front door to reveal his idiocy, but as I'm sure you guessed, the vat was gone. Just like that.

A few hours had passed since I had last seen it, and I had music playing so maybe I didn't hear the people coming to collect the vat, but I found it strange that such a large, unwieldy object had vanished just like that, within a few hours. It's unnerving to know that no one else that I can interrogate actually saw the vat. It was just swallowed up by the universe at large. Off to some parallel dimension where vats in the hallway aren't looked upon with such suspicion. I suppose I wish it well. I just hope I never see it again. Ever.



surfingisfun said:


> Even if you hate the fact that there is a huge vat in your hallway I had a great time reading your story. In fact I don't think I have sat down and read a story or book as long as your post in a long long time. Can you write more creative stories?


Thank you. You are kind. And obviously patient as well.



cloverstone said:


> Seb's stories always keep one reading...but dude you must find out what is inside that vat, we all need to know now!!! :shock:


I'm afraid we shall never know, Cloverstone. We're going to have to get used to this fact.



rein said:


> Yeah you have writing talent, but sometimes weird things happen  Yesterday there lay suddenly a metal shoe-horn in my mailbox :shock: and i don`t get it how it comes there and who puts it there and why :?


Good God. It's happening again. Shoe-horns and vats. Isn't this some sort of apocolyptic marker?



spirit said:


> WOW I would absoluley love a hallway like in that picture even with the psychic boy crawling up and down it and if I couldnt have him included I would just crawl up and down it myself to make it look creepy....its awesome.


You're certainly welcome to take my hallway. And my apartment. Or, if you aren't inclined to make such a permanent commitment, you're welcome to crawl up and down our hallway. Perhaps on your sentry duty, you can keep an eye out for large, mysterious vats. And shoe-horns. Something tells me we haven't heard the last of them.



layla said:


> :shock:


My sentiments exactly. Actually, to proper display my sentiments it would be this:  + :shock: + :? + :x + . But close enough.

s.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

MUST KNOW WHAT WAS IN THE VAT


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## Guest (Oct 30, 2008)

ROFLMAO! Seb, you are a fine writer. I considered for a bit that it was an iron lung? Never mind, LOL. Don't ask me why.

And damnit, I want to know what was in there as well. :shock: And ... on top of it all ... the word "vat" has no meaning now. I have read it, heard it, said it, pondered the contents so many times in the past 10 minutes it means nothing, LOLOLOL.

Also, that shot of the hallway in the Overlook -- I HAVE BEEN TO THAT HOTEL -- the exterior, The Timberline Lodge in Oregon I believe ... but the interior was a constructed set ... THAT is testimony to Stanley Kubrick's brilliant filmmaking and I forgot who shot that, but his cinematographers are always flawless -- he's often behind the camera or was, RIP.

Ah, I know what was in the vat! I giant rotting squid, LOLOLOL. I miss the days of old.

Really, your stuff is hilarious, Seb! :lol:


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## Guest (Oct 30, 2008)

Maybe Stanley Kubrick was in the vat? :shock: 
OMG, may that man rest in peace, I'm sorry.

I'm still laughing. Edit: 2 other possibilities related to major U.S. Government conspiracies no doubt.

The remains of:
1. Jimmy Hoffa
2. Osama Bin Laden

LOL, I'm sorry. I'm just ... I have issues. I'm STILL laughing at this and that is good. Yes, considering I slept a great part of the day ... sigh.


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## Revelation_old (Aug 9, 2004)

Seb, why are you wasting time at an office job with writing skills like this?

You should write an "essay" on Office Life vs The freedom as a writer that you so much deserve. It will help motivate you.

Life is too short, bro.


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## Guest (Oct 30, 2008)

Maybe Mr Illusive Sebastian is not a real person ,maybe Sebastian is another person from the forum pretending to be Sebastian  and thats why he couldnt meet Dreamer.

Maybe Sebastian is just a shadow or a vampire bot who is sucking out the life of all the members to make him real..

Maybe Sebastian is Revelation! :shock: .....maybe Revelation killed off all the moderators and members and then buried them under the forum patio and I am the only real person left. :?

_*These forum walls are old and creeky......weird things go on around here..it is a strange place indeed...things go bump in the night...

This post is for entertainment purposes only .....MY entertainment mwahahahaha....We all have a dark side ,eh?...*_

Its my favouirite day of the year in not so many minutes -halloween-,it,ll soon be midnight and I got carried away with it all I ghess 

*Ms.Mysterious.*


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## Revelation_old (Aug 9, 2004)

Have another.


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## Robsy (Dec 3, 2007)

lol ?


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## Guest (Oct 31, 2008)

Robsy said:


> lol ?


Indeed and....A sober LOL.


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## Rein (Apr 29, 2008)

Wow conspiracy theorie`s celebrate heyday!


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2008)

Spirit said:


> Maybe Mr Illusive Sebastian is not a real person ,maybe Sebastian is another person from the forum pretending to be Sebastian  and thats why he couldnt meet Dreamer.
> 
> Maybe Sebastian is just a shadow or a vampire bot who is sucking out the life of all the members to make him real..
> 
> ...


OK, I can attest to the following information which would indicate that Sebastian was indeed in Toronto on the night in question and that he is a real person, lol. And this still makes me angry with Sebastian as I drove from DETROIT to meet him. He will never be forgiven. This might or might not hold up in a court of law, however ....

I made it a point to see Marc Israel's film... Marc has DP, and discusses his DP openly in his films. He had a showing in Toronto. Another board member mentioned he also wanted to attend (said member hasn't been here in quite a while and I have no idea what he's up to.) At any rate, THAT person suggested the hostel we stayed at, which indeed was rather terrifying. The Seb man sad he would show up and meet us all! Safety in numbers.

OK, this guy I met from the board ... :shock: ... we met in the hostel lobby ... well we had dinner, got lost, and finally got to the U.of Toronto I believe? I have no clue where we were to be honest, LOL. We walked from Chinatown?

The film was late starting, so though we were late, we weren't late. I yelled Sebastian's name about 17 times. Nowhere to be found.

HOWEVER. After my return home to ze US of A, I emailed Seb, very angry with him ... well not really.  He said he was there! In the theatre! He knew what the film was about, and he couldn't have if he hadn't seen it THERE. No other screenings. He also said, "I saw you in the front row on the left with this guy." He was correct. That's where we were sitting!

He is indeed a man of mystery.  I really wanted to meet him. But I understand that it is not easy to just run into strangers and immediately have a fine time. I have experience with it. L.A. and London and a few friends elsewhere!

So, 'twas Seb. No doubt in my mind.
But I will never forgive him. When will I have the strength to drive to Toronto again? I slept one whole day after I drove there, and one whole day after I came home, lol.

Cheers,
Happy Haunting All.

What is the time in Europe right now? How many hours ahead of NYC? GMT vs. EDT?


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2008)

PS, I was detained at the border coming back into the US for talking too much.
SURPRISE! :?


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## Guest (Nov 1, 2008)

LOL,its ok I was just trick or treating  .I wasnt being very serious at all.

Detained for talking? LOL.

EDIT;oops its currently 5.01 am and I am still awake...anxiety and the night terrors. :?


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## Cam (Dec 13, 2006)

LOL, Dreamer got owned :mrgreen:


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