# Please help asap



## alexandra23 (Dec 15, 2008)

I have been fine lately. I haven't been on here in a while. But let me explain. I had been on Lexapro for about 5 months. I gained major weight so I stopped taking it cold turkey. The other day I had a headache. I never had a headache in my life. My mom insisted that I go to the emergency room so I did. They gave me some antinausea meds that supposedly help headaches and the side effects were being antsy and not being able to sit still. I had a major panic attack and begged them to take my IV out. My doctor appointment follow up confirmed that i had a "stress headache" which was mostly caused by me quiting my meds. My doctor, taking into consideration that I was concerned about weight gain prescribed me to wellbutrin XL 150mg. This pill hyped me up so bad and made me feel like i was on crack. I stopped taking it after 4 days. Tonight, I drank alcohol and for some reason, legitimately considered suicide. I have felt SOOOOOOO DP'ed out after the stopping of the med and I'm very scared. Idk what to do. This thought of ending my own life is scaring me and IDk what to do, is it just because I'm drunk? I'd appreciate any response, I really need the support right now. Also, If anyone has any experience with wellbutrin I'd appreciate hearing about your experiences. thank you so much, I'm sorry this was long.


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## egodeath (Oct 27, 2008)

It's because you drank alcohol and, maybe, possibly, because YOU QUIT LEXAPRO COLD TURKEY. You're not supposed to do that.


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## alexandra23 (Dec 15, 2008)

I haven't been taking lexapro for about 2 months but all of this just started happening within the past 2 weeks. I'm still having the bad thoughts though, like all day today, I feel like I'm going crazy. Should I go to the hospital? I feel like that will make me freak out even more but I know I really need help. I just need someone to tell me what to do. I want to tell my mom but I know she'll just dismiss it because she already calls me crazy.


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## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

if you are seriously considering commiting suicide then you might need to go to the hospital. I on the other hand think about suicide pretty regularly but am well aware that i would never do it. so if that's the case just tough it out. You might want to get back on the lexapro and take a smaller dosage just to level yourself out. you should never quit a med cold turkey it can have devistating effects. talk to a doctor about it but i would get back on a small dosage and slowly ween off of it.


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## Guest (Jul 17, 2009)

alexandra23 said:


> Tonight, I drank alcohol and for some reason, legitimately considered suicide.


Not to be a smart ass, but you really shouldn't mess psychotropic medications with alcohol. Especially anti-depressants. I did this for years!! I would go drinking every weekend and take various drugs during the week. It is really stupid and dangerous.  At the end of every night I drank I would have suicidal ideation's. Not good when you are buzzed up.

You either are going to be med free and drink occasionally or heavily, whatever you choose. Or be sober and take psychotropic medications.

You live, you learn. Don't mix the two. 8)


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## alexandra23 (Dec 15, 2008)

thanks for the advice guys. i ended up talking to my parents, my mom took me to my doctor and I told him everything. He said I'm having very frequent panic episodes with depressive reactions. I asked him how panic could make me want to kill myself. He said that panic manifests itself in many different ways blablah blah. He told me to take my lexapro again and we may need to increase the dose. also he gave me xanax .25 and referred me to a counseler which i am calling tomorrow. i have a positive outlook on the situation. wish me luck!


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Lexapro seems to be the new drug of choice among doctors. I still dont trust it. Especially since the documentation on their own homepage states that they really do not know how it works.

Nice that you got some Xanax tho, that will most probably help in any situation.


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## Claymore (Jun 13, 2009)

Inzom said:


> Nice that you got some Xanax tho, that will most probably help in any situation.


VERY TRUE!!!!! Im on Xanax and Ativan and they are the ONLY things that have helped my MASSIVE DP at all. Anti-deppressants usually don't really help with DP anyway but I do take a small dose of Citalopram, I don't know why. I guess just because the doc says "here is an anti-deppressant, take it, it might help." LOL


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

How much Ativan do you take Claymore?


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## Claymore (Jun 13, 2009)

Inzom said:


> How much Ativan do you take Claymore?


I get 2mg tabs and I probably take 4 to 5 of them a day. I take more Ativan than Xanax.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Interesting. Ativan/Lorazepam is probably the only common benzo I have not tried. 2mg several times a day seems like alot according to wikipedia.


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## egodeath (Oct 27, 2008)

Inzom said:


> Interesting. Ativan/Lorazepam is probably the only common benzo I have not tried. 2mg several times a day seems like alot according to wikipedia.


My brother used to eat those to fall asleep. I tried it once or twice, didn't think much of it.


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## Claymore (Jun 13, 2009)

egodeath said:


> Inzom said:
> 
> 
> > Interesting. Ativan/Lorazepam is probably the only common benzo I have not tried. 2mg several times a day seems like alot according to wikipedia.
> ...


They dont make me tired or anything. I just know my limit of how many I can take and yes it is a lot but I have a tolerance built up to it. 2mg tabs are the highest mg you can get. The more I take, the more normal I feel, although I never feel completely normal. I take a little Xanax with it to calm my body. The xanax is what will put me out if I take a lot of it. I dont have that big of a tolerance to it as I do with the Ativan because it is more potent. I get the "sticks" or 2mg, the highest mg you can get. I prolly take one stick a day.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Claymore said:


> The more I take, the more normal I feel, although I never feel completely normal.


This is my reaction to Oxazepam. Wonderful drug. It is such a shame that we have to be so reliant on chemicals. Well maybe we dont "have" to be, but it certainly is easy taking a pill.


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## Claymore (Jun 13, 2009)

Inzom said:


> Claymore said:
> 
> 
> > The more I take, the more normal I feel, although I never feel completely normal.
> ...


Dang right!!!. I wish I could get off of this medicine but if I did im certain I would end up back in the psych ward like I was before I got on it. At least while im on it, I can be at home with my family and go out occasionally.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Yeah. I have to get off Oxazepam now tho. Been on it to long and built up a tolerance = taking more = abuse = harder and harder to quit. Spoke to a doctor today who had several patients commited because of abuse of it.

He also did the usual praising and promoting of antidepressants that have never helped me and was sure I needed to change/escalate the dosage of Lexapro, he didnt mention my high dosage of Clonazepam tho, thank you Sweden for only listing it as an anti-epileptic I guess... this is gonna suck. He gave me some sleeping pills tho, non-addictive so they are probably gonna be weak.

This is gonna suck. But on the other hand I do wanna be off meds so I dunno...


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## Claymore (Jun 13, 2009)

Well good luck Chris.  Right now I don't think is the right time to get off my meds. My DP is so bad right now.


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## alexandra23 (Dec 15, 2008)

my xanex prescription is for .25 mgs and i can only take it 3 times a day so a I usually take it at like 9, 4, and again at 10. but lately around 3 or 4am I'll wake up with a very severe panic attack, like right now. I wake up with my DP ridiculously bad. My anxiety has never been this bad in my life I'm so afraid that it's just not ever going to go away, my DP used to be tolerable now it just feels like I'll never feel normal ever again.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Well alexandra, that is probably because the level of Xanax in your bloodstream might be at its lowest point at that time. As for the sleeping pills I mentioned earlier, they knocked me completely out, even now after waking up I feel groggy as hell... But they are supposed to be non-addictive and stuff, so might be worth a shot. They are called Propavan here, active substance Propiomazin. "brand names: Largon, Propavan, Indorm, Serentin, Indorm, Dorevane, Dorevan"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Propiomazine


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## Claymore (Jun 13, 2009)

alexandra23 said:


> my xanex prescription is for .25 mgs and i can only take it 3 times a day so a I usually take it at like 9, 4, and again at 10. but lately around 3 or 4am I'll wake up with a very severe panic attack, like right now. I wake up with my DP ridiculously bad. My anxiety has never been this bad in my life I'm so afraid that it's just not ever going to go away, my DP used to be tolerable now it just feels like I'll never feel normal ever again.


You might even want to talk to your doc about upping your dosage. I get the 2mg pills and I break it up throughout the day. I also take another benzo (Ativan 2mg) and Im supposed to take 3 of those a day with the Xanax but I usually end up taking like 5. Maybe your doc could add another benzo with yours especially if you are having extreme panic. I think its neccesary in your circumstances like it was when I was having panic. My DP would get so bad that if I wasnt in the bed, I was on the verge of panic. Now I dont get panicy very often and my DP isnt as intense but still bad in my case. Maybe a combo would be good for you, but im no doc.


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## julio (Jun 16, 2009)

Hey Alexandra,
I can relate to what you are going through.
When I first experienced my first panic attack I was given Lexapro 10mg, and I had worse panic attacks from taking it. I used to wake up in the middle of the night SCARED AND ANXIOUS and PANICKY. when I would fall sleep I would be the same way, scared and panic mode.
At times I felt like I was going to go crazy that I could not take it anymore and I was about to have a NERVOUS BREAK DOWN.
But as the months went by I managed it without meds, seen a SOCIAL WORKER helped me a lot.
Now I am on Medication ZOLOFT 25mg helps me a lot. I feel less panic and anxious. 
Dude I used to wake up in a COLD SWEAT.
Things will get better.
And it's true what someone else said here about if you have those though of killing yourself and you know you wont or can't than you are ok, I think. I used to have those, but I know that I could never do it, because I was and still am afraid of dying.

Hope you do better and hope and pray for everyone here who is going through all this.

We will get better, I know it


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