# Am I getting better or just used to it



## nrraiders35 (Jan 22, 2013)

I have have dp/dr pretty bad for the past 6 weeks and can't tell if I am on the road to recovery or just getting used to the sensation. When it first began I had overwhelming anxiety and this caused me to sleep for less than two hours a night. I can now sleep for 8-10 hours a night with the aid of medication but the times I got to bed and wake greatly vary.I feel that I am getting better but I still do not feel like myself at all. The outside world is much less scary I go out on my own but I feel very out of it sometimes. I feel like I still do not have my personality back and my memory and common sense seem to be greatly affected. I still feel distant from people I know much of the time. If anyone has recovered or is on the road could you tell me if these sensations are similar to the ones that you experienced.


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## Haumea (Jul 11, 2009)

Yep, sounds familiar:

Phase 1: DP + major freaking out that you have it

Phase 2: DP + you're calmer.



> can't tell if I am on the road to recovery or just getting used to the sensation.


You may consider that that's a false choice - it could be both. Before you can step onto the road to recovery you have to calm down and stop freaking out.


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## nrraiders35 (Jan 22, 2013)

Thanks for the reply Haumea, If you have recover or feel you are on the way, What would you consider phase 3 through recovery to be?


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## Haumea (Jul 11, 2009)

Process of exploration aimed at achieving recovery. This will very likely include depth psychology to examine "why did I DP in the first place?" Not in terms of triggers, but genuine root causes. Understanding one's conflicts, irrational fears, repressed emotions, excessive limiting beliefs, etc. Then one can start looking into tools to handle these issues.


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## ClassC (Jan 23, 2013)

Once you get used to it, it gets easier to manage and eventually doesn't becomes a problem anymore, i.e., goes away.


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## nrraiders35 (Jan 22, 2013)

Thanks ClassC, I am really concerned I will not get my personality back. I used to be really happy and funny but i guess that will take time?


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## ClassC (Jan 23, 2013)

nrraiders35 said:


> Thanks ClassC, I am really concerned I will not get my personality back. I used to be really happy and funny but i guess that will take time?


Don't worry, everything will feel normal again but it will take some time of course. Anxiety will make it difficult so try to eliminate these anxious thoughts and feelings that cause you to feel Depersonalized. It would also help tremendously if you took up a particular hobby or interest that you enjoy. Just remember not to associate Depersonalization with anything or it will continue to trouble you for a very long time. Hope you feel better soon.


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## Babebu (Jan 11, 2013)

I also had similar question - how not to remember those bad scary days of your past depersonalized state? When I feel like going to recover, I'm thinking something like "Wow, how could I be normal person, if I had such thoughts, such feelings? Normal people don't have it in their history..."


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## Haumea (Jul 11, 2009)

> Wow, how could I be normal person, if I had such thoughts, such feelings? Normal people don't have it in their history


You're too hung up on being "normal." Maybe you weren't meant to be "normal" but extraordinary.


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## WithYourSigh (Nov 25, 2012)

ClassC said:


> Once you get used to it, it gets easier to manage and eventually doesn't becomes a problem anymore, i.e., goes away.


I wonder what it was nine years ago, at the time of my DP being triggered, that rendered it everlasting and uncontrollable. While it is true that - as the first several weeks passed - I ceased experiencing reality as an utter illusion and my body as non-existent and barely controllable, the severe symptoms persisted. Although experiencing it all as living hell, I graduated from highschool; I completed a military service; I have a steady job; and, lastly, only recently have I discovered that it is DP I am suffering from, so I had nothing to hold on to all these years. I have long accepted that it is there and that it is the new "me", anti-"me" if you will.

I know these words are redundant and that I may be accused of perpetuating my DP. I can trace the triggering event, although I cannot understand it; I can trace the emotional-abuse issues of my childhood; and boy, I do not give a damn.

I needed to do this just once. You know, for luck.


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