# ..Am I Really In This Section? Holy Shit!



## York (Feb 26, 2008)

...O.k, so I'm almost afraid to write this down, but I think I'm getting a little bit better...
I wanted to tell you when it started to lift, maybe you can get something from it, it was three weeks ago.
I had to start taking my kid to school. I got up at seven and made him lunch and breakfast, dressed him, dressed me, ran out the door and all the way to school... Done it for three weeks now. And I've been better! When I come home, things aren't as unfamiliar any more. I used to have panic attacks bad as hell when I got inside my apartment; now it's o.k! I've stopped taking vitamins, fuck that shit. 
It's all in distraction, getting fresh air, solid sleep patterns and a higher purpose.

So, I'm at least 70% some days, which is bloody amazing as I thought I'd be in a black hole forever. I'm still very dp'd, but at least I'm not inside 24/7.


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## DownTheRabbitHole (May 30, 2009)

nice one york  im pleased for you.

i just came on here, to actually say i managed to cry just there, from listening to a song....i mean whats that all about? 22/m. crying at a song. dont even want to post it anywhere else now, as long as ive told someone.you.lol


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## York (Feb 26, 2008)

Ha ha.. That's cute (not what you wanted to hear I guess). I've been feeling very emotional too lately.. Maybe it's a good sign.
Didn't you say you were feeling better a week or so ago?


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## DownTheRabbitHole (May 30, 2009)

lol yeh cute was not what i was after  but since its you, il let you off hehe
yeh i was feeling better, still am i'd say, im no longer scared of dp, and in some ways i think im either past the worst of the storm, or in the eye of the storm. but tbh i dont care anymore. im not going to adjust my reality, to fit everyone elses reality. this is it, one life as a human being, going to just get on with it.
i cant seem to give up smoking weed yet either, went 3 days before i cracked and had a joint when i tried to give up. (someone on here said i had a drug problem...maybe i do.)

i keep getting moments of vivid clarity, where everything around me, is filling up my senses, and overwhelmingly beautiful(gay thing to say lol), but i start obssessing on that, and then the DP state of mind comes over.

ive came up with another idea, thats to do with day dreaming-dp being related.
i rememembered when i was stoned, that i used to day dream as a kid, like proper stare into a space, and not hear anyone around me,with thoughts elsewhere, and i think it kind of felt like what DP felt like.
i can remember a few times as a kid, getting these wierd kind of feelings that felt ''bad'' as i used to say to my mum and sister. it would always be in the morning or lunchtime, i would say '' its going to be a bad morning'' 
and they would ask '' what do you mean?''
''i can feel it'' was my reply.

strange memories keep coming back to me, when im stoned.

were you a day dreamer as a kid?


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## York (Feb 26, 2008)

Yeah, i was.. And I have a really overly active imagination, which isn't good combined with anxiety..
I wonder if that is common in dp people. I think I've read it is. When you are good at getting lost in a book or movie etc, which I really am (I shut off everything and have been told a billion times growing up).

If you read my latest post, you'll see I'm not too positive atm, but your post made me feel a bit better. I know when dp lifts things _do_ feel better, and you're right, this is it, "life", and you got to just live it.

:wink:


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## DownTheRabbitHole (May 30, 2009)

im glad it made you feel slightly better 

have you seen the film..

Science of Sleep 
by the director/writer of eternal sunshine of the spotless mind?

if not , i recomend it, it deals with over active imagination, dreaming reality being overlapped into reality, and even shows you a creative view of the inside of our heads, (the little (wo)man controlling us, and our dreams, and our world.


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## York (Feb 26, 2008)

I'll make sure I see it  Haven't seen Numb either, the combination of DP and romantic comedy strikes me as a little odd..


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## DownTheRabbitHole (May 30, 2009)

numb made me feel good.some bits were a bit daft,but overall id say its a good film, even better if you have DP and can relate to the character more, and even more so if you are single and looking for that beautiful girl( the girl in the movie is absolutely stunning)
the other film, i think im going to have to watch a couple of times to fully understand it, but the initial messages i got from it, were all good though, its a bit wacky, but i like wacky


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