# I am recovering.



## Universal (May 30, 2005)

This has become evident to me. I am no longer as afraid of people as I used to be. In fact, I've realized that trying to control your thoughts is merely a dead end street. No matter how hard you try, you cannt control your thoughts. You can however, become more aware of them. Once you do, the negative thoughts will sort of automatically vanish. The key is to become more AWARE. More conscious. You have to become curious about your problem, and sometimes it takes alot of struggling, but for me it took a few years to be able to "beat" my mental ilness.

Now, not that I still don't have drawbacks, personal failure, dispair, and misery in my life. Rather, it's how I deal with the drawbacks, the misery, the despair and the failure that always seems to bombard human life.

I've realized that one thing I've been searching deeply for a sort of connection, of meaningful interactions with people, and a "oneness" with the Universe. I've also realized that no matter how hard I try, without action, persistence, and motivation there is no way I can bring my goals of recovery, or another other goal, into reality.

One has to be curious about his illness, to try psychotherapuetic options, look behind a crevice here and there for some hope of recovery.


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## Guest (Feb 20, 2008)

great your doing better goodluck

i just gotto say: the more AWARE i am of my thoughts, the worse i get, so this doesnt work for those with DR who question reality, the opposite actually i would suggest


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

thats what i told you


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## Guest (Feb 21, 2008)

you told him to obsess over his thoughts? thats really bad advice


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

Copeful said:


> for those with DR who question reality, the opposite actually i would suggest


thats what i told you

@post starter right on bro good to hear


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## Universal (May 30, 2005)

I think I'm relapsing. I just quit going to school because for some reason I'm either too unmotivated or... I mean there's gotta be something wrong with me. I don't understand how I can go from doing so great the first semester to doing so horribly now. What's going on? Am I really getting worse? I don't know, but I know I'll be seeing alot more of this forum now because I won't be going to school. I'm going to try to find a job, but how can I be responsible for that if I can't find the responsibility to go to school? I'm really in a dump-hole right now. OH-BOY. What's the use in trying all these methods and stuff to help myself if in the end it all falls into the crapper again?


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