# Hopeless!!! PLEASE HELP



## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

I thought I just had DP, but yesterday and earlier today I started to realize its actually more DR. I've tried doing more research on DR but it doesnt seem to be something that talked about as much as DP. I do currently have both, probably 85% DR & 15% DP. Im so scared, so scared I will be like this forever. I feel SOOOO far from reality and so disconnected from myself and my surroundings that NOTHING feels real. I have no emotional connection to anything or anyone. I feel like I did this to myself, I was feeling better earlier but then ofcourse I wanted to find the answer to something and started doing a bunch of research and feel SOOO far into DP/DR. I dont even know how Im writing this right now. Just a few days ago I had hope that I could come out of this. I HAVE before , a couple years ago. But this time its so different. Like back then I was so much more strict on getying enough sleep and going on with life. I had school then, friends to always see, I was always distracted. And now Im not in school anymore (graduated) , dont have a job (was looking for one before my DP/DR got so bad) all my friends are busy all day. I just dont know what to do right now. My emotions are barely there. I had very bad anxiety before I had a mental break down that gave me a relapse of DP/DR . Someone whos recovered or recovering please help.


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## Guest (Oct 28, 2016)

Have you tried medications?


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## Pondererer (May 18, 2016)

I recently started doing this (boost dopamin): http://www.collective-evolution.com/2016/01/20/10-ways-to-increase-dopamine-levels-in-the-brain/

and i started nicotin gum (which also increase dopamin). I've only just started but it's working. I feel like i am able to see myself, in the sense of i am aware of what i am doing, and i see what i need to right here and now in order to feel better / recover / move forward.


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## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

Auraa said:


> Have you tried medications?


No I have not tried medication, medication is going to be one of my last resorts. I've read that it just masks the symptoms for a lot of people, and once they come off the medication their symptoms get worse. I do have an appointment with a therapist in a couple weeks, so hoping that can give me some relief


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## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

Pondererer said:


> I recently started doing this (boost dopamin): http://www.collective-evolution.com/2016/01/20/10-ways-to-increase-dopamine-levels-in-the-brain/
> 
> and i started nicotin gum (which also increase dopamin). I've only just started but it's working. I feel like i am able to see myself, in the sense of i am aware of what i am doing, and i see what i need to right here and now in order to feel better / recover / move forward.


Thank you for your reply!!  how much has meditation helped? Im thinking about trying it. I've only had this monster DP/DR for a month and its already destroyed my outlook on life  I believe that I will be like this for the rest of my days, and Im only 18. I do think that I have so much stress/anxiety built up in me. Whenever I was up, I wake up with a knot in my stomach and my heart racing. Like even right now I feel panic rushing through my body for no reason. Im also going to start seeing a therapist in a couple of weeks, have you tried therapy?


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## Pondererer (May 18, 2016)

Heather414 said:


> Thank you for your reply!!  how much has meditation helped? Im thinking about trying it. I've only had this monster DP/DR for a month and its already destroyed my outlook on life  I believe that I will be like this for the rest of my days, and Im only 18. I do think that I have so much stress/anxiety built up in me. Whenever I was up, I wake up with a knot in my stomach and my heart racing. Like even right now I feel panic rushing through my body for no reason. Im also going to start seeing a therapist in a couple of weeks, have you tried therapy?


Meditation is nice, because it calms me down and lets me focus better. But it's not a magic fix or anything. It takes a little practive to achieve that calmness. I recently started therapy, which is next to useless right now because my therapist is clueless when it comes to DP. But i'm gonna talk a psychiatrist and hopefully try some medcations soon.


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## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

Pondererer said:


> Meditation is nice, because it calms me down and lets me focus better. But it's not a magic fix or anything. It takes a little practive to achieve that calmness. I recently started therapy, which is next to useless right now because my therapist is clueless when it comes to DP. But i'm gonna talk a psychiatrist and hopefully try some medcations soon.


Good luck to you and your journey!!! Let me know if you do start taking medication. I really want to try meditation but Im such an impatient person and dont know if that would help me. Ofcourse I need to try it first....Ive gone through this before and came out on the other side, I dont know why Im having so much doubt and hopelessness that I can do it again. Have you had problems with emotions?


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## marduk (Mar 4, 2015)

I would also recommend meditation as it really helps when you are in worst depths of anxiety to calm you down, there are a few quite short guided meditations on youtube that are like 10 minutes long











in the links are a few 10 minute long meditations you can easily do at home or anywhere.

Well if you have anxiety induced dpdr you naturally have to ease the anxiety and obsession about your symptoms at least it is what has helped me a lot, try to keep busy as much as you can even if you feel like total crap and gradually it starts to ease up, but there's no rush and take a step at a time but you will need to get out of your head, obsession and anxiety feeds the dpdr in most cases.

Marduk


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## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

marduk said:


> I would also recommend meditation as it really helps when you are in worst depths of anxiety to calm you down, there are a few quite short guided meditations on youtube that are like 10 minutes long
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Thank you for the links!! I will start doing them and see if they help in any way. Did you feel like your whole life before DP/DR didnt happen. Like I have memories of my life before but they seem so distant, like they didnt really happen. I have totally lost myself right now. I got so caught up in my head that I feel like I dont exist. Will this go away? Lol I feel so silly asking since I've been through this before, and came out on the other side. I just currently have nothing to distract me so Im ALWAYS in my head and realizing when something feels weird , which is 24/7 now. I sometimes for a couple seconds will experience happiness or some weight taken off me, but even that feels like it actually isn't happening. I also can almost never look in a mirror because it feels like Im looking right through it. Do you experience this?


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## marduk (Mar 4, 2015)

Heather414 said:


> Thank you for the links!! I will start doing them and see if they help in any way. Did you feel like your whole life before DP/DR didnt happen. Like I have memories of my life before but they seem so distant, like they didnt really happen. I have totally lost myself right now. I got so caught up in my head that I feel like I dont exist. Will this go away? Lol I feel so silly asking since I've been through this before, and came out on the other side. I just currently have nothing to distract me so Im ALWAYS in my head and realizing when something feels weird , which is 24/7 now. I sometimes for a couple seconds will experience happiness or some weight taken off me, but even that feels like it actually isn't happening. I also can almost never look in a mirror because it feels like Im looking right through it. Do you experience this?


Most of those symptoms i have had that you describe, especially the mirror part, i felt like the person in the mirror is not me because i felt so alienated from my surroundings and myself. And my former life felt very distant too together with pretty much anything else, these are very common symptoms of dpdr and have subsided for me.


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## Chicane (Oct 8, 2015)

I always feel like it's important to tackle the anxiety first and foremost. So if nothing else, I would talk to your therapist and have an open mind when it comes to meds. I was a lot like you, didn't want to be on anything, didn't want to be dependent on them etc. But in hindsight I think it's the best move I could've made, because at least these days I'm relatively relaxed. My sleep and appetite improved a lot, and I stopped caring quite so much (which in our case is a good thing). My racings thoughts and existential worry, while still there, have gone down a lot. So just know that your therapist will likely recommend you start on some form of medication, and I would urge you to give it a shot since you seem to be pretty panicky. Right now it's a case of taking the help where available, and you can always taper off or switch to something less harsh later down the line once you're more chill. Oh and try to interact socially whenever possible and keep busy if you can, that will help a lot. Good luck to you.


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## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

marduk said:


> Most of those symptoms i have had that you describe, especially the mirror part, i felt like the person in the mirror is not me because i felt so alienated from my surroundings and myself. And my former life felt very distant too together with pretty much anything else, these are very common symptoms of dpdr and have subsided for me.


Have you ever felt like you literally didnt exist? Like everything around you didnt exist? I feel like I've lost all of my 18 years. I feel no connection to anything or anyone. Did these go away for you? Im so scared, really starting to consider taking mesication because I literally feel anxious ALL day.


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## Heather414 (Oct 2, 2016)

Chicane said:


> I always feel like it's important to tackle the anxiety first and foremost. So if nothing else, I would talk to your therapist and have an open mind when it comes to meds. I was a lot like you, didn't want to be on anything, didn't want to be dependent on them etc. But in hindsight I think it's the best move I could've made, because at least these days I'm relatively relaxed. My sleep and appetite improved a lot, and I stopped caring quite so much (which in our case is a good thing). My racings thoughts and existential worry, while still there, have gone down a lot. So just know that your therapist will likely recommend you start on some form of medication, and I would urge you to give it a shot since you seem to be pretty panicky. Right now it's a case of taking the help where available, and you can always taper off or switch to something less harsh later down the line once you're more chill. Oh and try to interact socially whenever possible and keep busy if you can, that will help a lot. Good luck to you.


Yes I am very panicky right now!! But Im so detatched from myself and everything around me that I almost cannot feel the panic. Im really starting to think about medication, I heard that lexapro has helped a lot of people, including my friend who doesnt suffer from dp/dr, but just really bad anxiety in general. When I first got this I actually went out a good amount and interacted with people when I could. But my DR has gotten SOOOO bad in the past few days that Im terrified to be in my own house since I cant recognize anything, like I know my room is my room, but I feel a million miles away from it. Its hard for me to go out and see people because most of my friends are busy almost all day and I have lost interest in all the things I used to love. What can I do to help these things until I start medication? My appointmemt is in 12 days, but idk of I can wait 12 days to get some kind of relief, its SOOO bad right now


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## Chicane (Oct 8, 2015)

Heather414 said:


> Yes I am very panicky right now!! But Im so detatched from myself and everything around me that I almost cannot feel the panic. Im really starting to think about medication, I heard that lexapro has helped a lot of people, including my friend who doesnt suffer from dp/dr, but just really bad anxiety in general. When I first got this I actually went out a good amount and interacted with people when I could. But my DR has gotten SOOOO bad in the past few days that Im terrified to be in my own house since I cant recognize anything, like I know my room is my room, but I feel a million miles away from it. Its hard for me to go out and see people because most of my friends are busy almost all day and I have lost interest in all the things I used to love. What can I do to help these things until I start medication? My appointmemt is in 12 days, but idk of I can wait 12 days to get some kind of relief, its SOOO bad right now


I understand completely. I remember how hard it was for me to wait for that first appointment, just dying to get some relief. It really will come though, I promise. You just have to occupy yourself as best you can in the meantime. How's your family/friend situation? Can you stay with them/lean on them for some support? The best thing I found in that time was to try and relax with some people I found comforting in my own life. Being able to talk about it and get things off your chest in a non-judgemental way really helps.

Oh, and those symptoms are classic DPDR, just knowing that should also help because so many of us go through it daily - feeling totally detached and removed, and having to ground ourselves and remind ourselves of where we are and that it's all okay. Very difficult to do when you're panicky though. That's why I feel the right meds will help you a great deal.


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## Guest (Oct 30, 2016)

Heather, get yourself to an ER, say you are suicidal (even if you aren't) and get to an in-patient psyche ward! You will see a psychiatrist within 24 hours than from the time you go in the ER.


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