# Dating With Dp



## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

Have any of you tried to date while having dp? Were you afraid to tell the person you have it? How did they react when you told them?

I was asked out to dinner with a guy and he had no idea I have dp. He asked if I like to drink socially and I said yes but I can't because of some medication I'm on. I didn't say anything more and I wonder how long you can go without telling someone. I mean, when you date someone, you get to know them. How do I explain that I can't remember most of my past, that I have career goals but have to just live one day at time, that I'm on benzos, that I'm NOT crazy? Ug. This is all very complicated.


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## babybowrain (Aug 24, 2010)

Don't say anything...I usually slip in that I'm anxious person if I feel they get a hint that I'm nervous or something. Some dating books say not to say anything for like a year of dating. Of course I don't know how that's going to make someone react ;/


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

babybowrain said:


> Don't say anything...I usually slip in that I'm anxious person if I feel they get a hint that I'm nervous or something. Some dating books say not to say anything for like a year of dating. Of course I don't know how that's going to make someone react ;/


Lol yeah but how do I explain the last year of my life? I mean, I was bedridden for 5 months. How do I explain why I can't remember so many things about my life or why I have "bad" days and seem like a different person? How do I explain why I can't work, etc?


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## babybowrain (Aug 24, 2010)

It's possible to just say "I was sick with something..." and leave it at that. Sometimes they don't ask







I'm not really sure honestly. It's nice to know I'm not the only one unable to work and pretty much disabled because of my anxiety ;/ I sleep more than half the day. I don't even know how you get normal dates, mine are all with strange people from dating sites.


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## Rogue Bullies (Jun 1, 2010)

If you guys start getting serious, then I would go into detail. Other wise don't. Have fun, go out and get to know him. If anything tell him you have some anxiety issues you are working on. If it comes down to it explain DP, but don't make a big deal out of it. I doubt anyone really into you will care and people with DP don't seem different to anyone else. Your recovering anyway so I doubt it will be a problem for long. Have fun on your date


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## seanneedshelp (Nov 9, 2009)

ustabetinyfairypeople said:


> Have any of you tried to date while having dp? Were you afraid to tell the person you have it? How did they react when you told them?
> 
> I was asked out to dinner with a guy and he had no idea I have dp. He asked if I like to drink socially and I said yes but I can't because of some medication I'm on. I didn't say anything more and I wonder how long you can go without telling someone. I mean, when you date someone, you get to know them. How do I explain that I can't remember most of my past, that I have career goals but have to just live one day at time, that I'm on benzos, that I'm NOT crazy? Ug. This is all very complicated.


When I had DP, I was living in a beach house (this past summer) and I wanted to start dating again. I wasn't going to let depersonalization/derealization stop me from meeting girls and getting some action







so went out in spite of how detached I felt from my body and the world and went into town and said, "I'm not leaving until I get a date." And what happened?.. the first girl that I introduced myself to ended up talking with me for 2 hours... I asked her out.. we went mini golfing the next day... We had a good time... but she definitely sensed that something was up and didn't return my calls.... I am still proud of myself for getting a date while being in such a scary state. HAHA!


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## seanneedshelp (Nov 9, 2009)

ustabetinyfairypeople said:


> Have any of you tried to date while having dp? Were you afraid to tell the person you have it? How did they react when you told them?
> 
> I was asked out to dinner with a guy and he had no idea I have dp. He asked if I like to drink socially and I said yes but I can't because of some medication I'm on. I didn't say anything more and I wonder how long you can go without telling someone. I mean, when you date someone, you get to know them. How do I explain that I can't remember most of my past, that I have career goals but have to just live one day at time, that I'm on benzos, that I'm NOT crazy? Ug. This is all very complicated.


When I had DP, I was living in a beach house (this past summer) and I wanted to start dating again. I wasn't going to let depersonalization/derealization stop me from meeting girls and getting some action







so went out in spite of how detached I felt from my body and the world and went into town and said, "I'm not leaving until I get a date." And what happened?.. the first girl that I introduced myself to ended up talking with me for 2 hours... I asked her out.. we went mini golfing the next day... We had a good time... but she definitely sensed that something was up and didn't return my calls.... I am still proud of myself for getting a date while being in such a scary state. HAHA!


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

seanneedshelp said:


> When I had DP, I was living in a beach house (this past summer) and I wanted to start dating again. I wasn't going to let depersonalization/derealization stop me from meeting girls and getting some action
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Right on


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## pigandpepper (Sep 26, 2010)

I started dating my boyfriend before I knew I had DP, but I already had anxiety, OCD, and depression. I knew that I needed someone who would be patient with me when I have my off days and definitely didn't want someone who would just think I'm crazy and run off, so I explained it all pretty early. Before we became 'official' I explained to him my condition, why it got to the point where I had to be homeschooled for some time, and how it affects me. It didn't seem to scare him off like I thought it would. Our 3-year anniversary is next month







Granted, we were already friends before we started dating and we were also in high school. I don't know how much of a difference that makes.
Bottom line, I think if you want a serious relationship, it's something you should get out of the way early. I would be terrified of him finding out months into the relationship and deciding he can't handle it.


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## junkinmahcranium (Jun 29, 2010)

I make the mistake of telling him and then, after he accepts it and tries to make me feel better, making myself out to be some crazy nutjob bitch.

It's kinda fucked up.


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## Rogue Bullies (Jun 1, 2010)

The guy I have been hanging out with a little knows I have some anxiety issues, but doesn't know anything about DP. He doesn't need to as I am getting over it and prefer people not to know. I don't act different from anyone else and no one can tell I have anything of the sort. I don't even really get anxious anymore and if I do I don't show it ignore it.

The only thing about it, is this guy is really smart and DP makes me feel like my brain is perma fried all the time so I don't feel like my old witty self again and can't keep up as well. We are both debaters, but DP makes it hard LOL.


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