# Hi All (My DP Experience)



## GHSJerCon (Aug 27, 2006)

Hello everyone, I'm new to this site but I'm glad that I've found it. A lot of the stories/descriptions of DP that i've read have made me feel much more comfortable about my situation and DP experience. So, this is my experience.

First off, for all my life I have been a generally anxious/worry-prone person. I've never had any huge problems with this, just acknowledged it was the way I am. I led a (somewhat) normal and happy life up until this incident.

I went over to a close friends house to get high - I had been smoking pot (no other drug use) for about 4-5 months socially, anywhere from 0-3 times a week, with once a week being about average. We began smoking and everything was fine and normal. I was walking around outside (just enjoying my high) when I suddenly became aware of my heartbeat. I began to worry it was beating too fast, then too hard, and as my anxiety built my heart went faster and my anxiety went higher, snowballing into a full-on panic attack. This was my first panic attack (straight or influenced) I had ever experienced. I began thinking I was going to die and "freaking out". My friend calmed me down, helping me through it, as he had been with people who experienced panic attacks before. After about 3 or 4 hours, when the high wound down, I finally made it to sleep.

For about 3 days afterwards, I still felt the effects of being high, and they scared me. When the haze finally wore off, I started experiencing panic attacks (1-2 a day) for almost three weeks. I looked up my symptoms and talked to various friends, and diagnosed myself with panic attacks. I managed them on my own, leading an otherwise normal life, until the 3rd week of my episodes. It was late at night, about 1AM, and I had a panic attack. However, my attack didnt last for the usual 10-30 minutes. At about 4AM, I was still freaking out, and I felt like I was high. I got so scared that I went to the ER, thinking I was dying.

Once I was there I slowly calmed down, and was sent home without a real diagnosis or prognosis. The next day, I went to my GP and told him of my symptoms, and was prescribed librium (benzodiazepine) and paxil (SSRI). As luck would have it, I had just read several articles (I forget why) a few days before about paxil's negative effects and heard some terrible stories about it. Being the worrier I am, I decided not to get the Paxil filled. I took the Librium from that point (about a month ago) till about 4 days ago, when (after slowly lowering my dosage - as common with benzodiazepines) I stopped using it, as it was not providing any relief for me.

After seeing my GP, I no longer have panic attacks, but more generalized feelings of anxiety and unreality. I have periods where I feel completely detached from my body, or like a robot. Sometimes I question reality or existence, or (most commonly) feel like I'm dreaming or stuck in a dream; not sure if I'm ever really awake or asleep. Due to this, going to sleep and waking up are the worst parts of my day. I don't like losing control of my thoughts, as this is the way I feel during periods of DP, that I cannot control my horrible thoughts of nonexistence or meaninglessness. Also, sometimes when I am alone, I will think that I'm trapped in a room I will never be able to escape from. I try telling myself these thoughts are irrational, but it just doesn't work.

Researching these feelings led me to this website, and to where I am now. So that's my story, and I'll be greatly appreciative of any feedback or comments you guys leave me.

Edit: P.S. Please feel free to contact me via email or AIM to share experiences - I enjoy listening to others and talking to those with similar experiences.


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## +[ thedeadpoet ]+ (Jul 23, 2006)

Good Day GHSJerCon,

Marijuana is a notorious catalyst for triggering anxiety among its users, and personally I've arrived at the conclusion that dp is a result of severe anxiety and fatigue and nothing more (but dont take it as fact, obviously).

Feel free to look over my past posts to view my experience because I have a habit of repeating myself these days and dont wish to further it.

Good luck


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## Milan (May 29, 2005)

thedeadpoet said:


> personally I've arrived at the conclusion that dp is a result of severe anxiety and fatigue and nothing more (but dont take it as fact, obviously).


I agree with this statement.

I've noticed drastic improvements with my symptoms when anxiety and fatigue levels are low. Completely dissolve anxiety and fatigue there is no place for DP/DR to exist. And the only way that I can see how to lower these levels is through relaxation and sleep which is difficult when anxiety precludes the effectiveness of these functions.


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## nick_london (Sep 4, 2006)

[quote name="GHSJerCon"]Hello everyone, I'm new to this site but I'm glad that I've found it. A lot of the stories/descriptions of DP that i've read have made me feel much more comfortable about my situation and DP experience. So, this is my experience.

First off, for all my life I have been a generally anxious/worry-prone person. I've never had any huge problems with this, just acknowledged it was the way I am. I led a (somewhat) normal and happy life up until this incident.

I went over to a close friends house to get high - I had been smoking pot (no other drug use) for about 4-5 months socially, anywhere from 0-3 times a week, with once a week being about average. We began smoking and everything was fine and normal. I was walking around outside (just enjoying my high) when I suddenly became aware of my heartbeat. I began to worry it was beating too fast, then too hard, and as my anxiety built my heart went faster and my anxiety went higher, snowballing into a full-on panic attack. This was my first panic attack (straight or influenced) I had ever experienced. I began thinking I was going to die and "freaking out". My friend calmed me down, helping me through it, as he had been with people who experienced panic attacks before. After about 3 or 4 hours, when the high wound down, I finally made it to sleep.

For about 3 days afterwards, I still felt the effects of being high, and they scared me. When the haze finally wore off, I started experiencing panic attacks (1-2 a day) for almost three weeks. I looked up my symptoms and talked to various friends, and diagnosed myself with panic attacks. I managed them on my own, leading an otherwise normal life, until the 3rd week of my episodes. It was late at night, about 1AM, and I had a panic attack. However, my attack didnt last for the usual 10-30 minutes. At about 4AM, I was still freaking out, and I felt like I was high. I got so scared that I went to the ER, thinking I was dying.

Once I was there I slowly calmed down, and was sent home without a real diagnosis or prognosis. The next day, I went to my GP and told him of my symptoms, and was prescribed librium (benzodiazepine) and paxil (SSRI). As luck would have it, I had just read several articles (I forget why) a few days before about paxil's negative effects and heard some terrible stories about it. Being the worrier I am, I decided not to get the Paxil filled. I took the Librium from that point (about a month ago) till about 4 days ago, when (after slowly lowering my dosage - as common with benzodiazepines) I stopped using it, as it was not providing any relief for me.

After seeing my GP, I no longer have panic attacks, but more generalized feelings of anxiety and unreality. I have periods where I feel completely detached from my body, or like a robot. Sometimes I question reality or existence, or (most commonly) feel like I'm dreaming or stuck in a dream; not sure if I'm ever really awake or asleep. Due to this, going to sleep and waking up are the worst parts of my day. I don't like losing control of my thoughts, as this is the way I feel during periods of DP, that I cannot control my horrible thoughts of nonexistence or meaninglessness. Also, sometimes when I am alone, I will think that I'm trapped in a room I will never be able to escape from. I try telling myself these thoughts are irrational, but it just doesn't work.

This is very similar to my experience.


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