# TO THOSE WHO HAD IT OVER 6 YEARS OR OVER.



## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

Do you stil notice it?


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## Pollyanna 3098 (Dec 12, 2006)

How could you not!!


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

I dont notice it anymore i always go with the 'flow' 
but yet dp stil remains :shock: as in i longer feel like im not in my body and i dont feel like im living in a dream


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## widescreened (Jun 22, 2005)

of course you still notice it, but you dont care or obsess about it, the way you were less aware of it before it permiated your consciousness. Which is the key to getting out of the mess, ignoring it no matter what until you start to care less and less about it.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

Absolutely. But it has leveled off to one "bearable" level I don't want to be at. I have fewer "dips into Hell" but it is still limiting. Recently the DR is worse. See my website for further info.

Best,
D


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## Dptilldeath (Jul 27, 2007)

I wonder why if you are not obsess anymore about dp,dr why you are not free from it?


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

im wondering the same thing. What I think it is is that, we have have made a "comfort zone" in our minds and we are going with the flow within this comfortzone... but eventuly we will get tired of it and let it go I notice sometimes when I wake up I have this wonderful sensation in me.


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## Dptilldeath (Jul 27, 2007)

In my case i can't stop obsess about it. I f i try hard i get anxious and then it's worst. You are in better place than me. Try to think what you could do to free completely your self from it. I mean you already have make the bigest step which is to ignore it and as a resault you don't feel unreal and out of your body.


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

have you tried just letting it take over you? this is how i got rid of derealization


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## Dptilldeath (Jul 27, 2007)

Yes i have tried that but you see for me the atack is not only dp and dr is and negative thoughts about my self,low self eastem,strong obsesions.


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## PPPP (Nov 26, 2006)

.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

Dptilldeath said:


> I wonder why if you are not obsess anymore about dp,dr why you are not free from it?


See my site for details. Too long a story. I'm 48, don't freak out, have had this since a child. Part of the problem is I believe I was born a very anxious kid, my family was crazy, and I never got help early enough.

For me, I always remember feeling odd. I believe early intervention makes a huge difference, however I do know people who have had this for much of their life and it can be on a spectrum -- terrible to bearable to a nuisance.

We are all unique.

Best,
D


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

? I did look on your site I dont see why it doesint go away if ive become "use to it" I dont even have anxity I have had lots of trauma but I dont see how this is a factor ive always delt with trauma


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

ihavemessedupdreams said:


> ? I did look on your site I dont see why it doesint go away if ive become "use to it" I dont even have anxity I have had lots of trauma but I dont see how this is a factor ive always delt with trauma


I have a theory section there, so I won't repeat myself. I simply believe that we tend to be very anxious people whether we always are aware of it or not. It's sort of rumbling below the surface -- at least for me. Even on meds, I'm still anxious/tense.

We are also prone to dissociate. This is just our predisposition. This I think is why it is difficult for some of us to get rid of it. I have "clear spaces" now and then, once in a blue moon, that "just happen" -- no good reason. Then they go away. I get a brief sense of relief.

The problem for me also, is I have this 24/7 all the time, even in my dreams. Aside from the "clear spaces" I don't get relief, so I have nothing to reinforce feeling better. It has sort of become a part of me, and I HATE it, it has limited my life, but I'm not afraid of it as I was when I was younger.

Read the theories section on my site. Read what Ramachandran has to say there. Or maybe my description of DP/DR as well.

Cheers,
D


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## LOSTONE (Jul 9, 2005)

Yes but I don't think about it near as often as I used to.

It can still hit me really hard sometimes though.

If I don't sleep at least 9 hours each night then I have big problems.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

LOSTONE said:


> Yes but I don't think about it near as often as I used to.
> 
> *It can still hit me really hard sometimes though.*
> 
> If I don't sleep at least 9 hours each night then I have big problems.


Yup. Same with me. But I do fear getting hit hard. And when I'm hit hard I can generally trace it to a clear stressor, sometimes not. When it is unpredictable like that it is particularly scary. But I don't dwell on it. I push the thoughts out of my head endlessly. My CBT work on this.


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## Dptilldeath (Jul 27, 2007)

> The problem for me also, is I have this 24/7 all the time, Aside from the "clear spaces" I don't get relief, so I have nothing to reinforce feeling better. It has sort of become a part of me, and I HATE it, it has limited my life, but I'm not afraid of it as I was when I was younger.
> 
> /quote]
> 
> Same here exactly for 21 years non stop so you understand it's not easy to get rid of it. We are not the same here all of us about dp,dr. Same symptoms but not same strengh of them to us.


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## LISA NICHOLS (Sep 3, 2005)

IVE HAD IT SINCE I WERE 8 !!!!

and the answer to that is YES i still notice it....

it seems that it goes to the peak of the dp/dr attack and im like whoooooooooooah there :shock:

its weird as you may feel like hmmmmm ive had it for this long why dont i just crack on with life , surley i should be use to it ...

if only ....each time it scares the hell out of me ....


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## chris51 (Mar 21, 2005)

I've had it forever also. I remember feeling weird in Kindergarten, like I was looking through a camera. I was hypervigliant of other peoples emotions.....etc.....typical DP symptoms. But I always knew something was wrong with me. I just thought "when I get older I'll feel more grounded, less spacey" WHen I garaduate college I feel more like someone. Well at 38 I realized this is it. This strange feeling was me. However, I did have times I feel good since I was a kid. Then I started to recover and for me that was accepting that I have DP.

So Yes some how I always knew I felt different. Partially because I did have times when I was not DP.


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## Luka (Aug 30, 2005)

Same here...


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## PPPP (Nov 26, 2006)

.


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## chris51 (Mar 21, 2005)

Layla said:


> The strange thing is how we still notice it even those of us who grew up with it.
> Even when I would tell myself that it was normal to feel this way I knew that that couldn't be right.
> You'd think that when it's all we know that it wouldn't bother us but I think we can still tell that it isn't this way for others.
> I used to wonder if other people actually felt the same way and they were just faking it really well or if it was just me and they were genuine.


I know it is strange right? I like the idea that other people are just faking it. :lol I always thought there is no way I see the world like this and other people see it completely different.


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## AllmindnoBrain (Jun 28, 2007)

Layla said:


> The strange thing is how we still notice it even those of us who grew up with it.
> Even when I would tell myself that it was normal to feel this way I knew that that couldn't be right.
> You'd think that when it's all we know that it wouldn't bother us but I think we can still tell that it isn't this way for others.
> I used to wonder if other people actually felt the same way and they were just faking it really well or if it was just me and they were genuine.


weird, i used to feel the same way, and yes when i was in kindergarten i felt that something wasnt right. I figured something was wrong when i would try to imagine how other people perceived the world and just knew that they couldnt feel the same way i did because there behavior would show it.


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## ihavemessedupdreams (Apr 19, 2007)

for the longest time i thought it was just pubirty and i just lacked personailty lol


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## AllmindnoBrain (Jun 28, 2007)

ihavemessedupdreams said:


> for the longest time i thought it was just pubirty and i just lacked personailty lol


I thought i was mentally retarded


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## Life Sentence? (Jul 20, 2007)

18 + years! I am accustom to it, but I will never get used to it or accept it!


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## ken (Feb 22, 2006)

If I didn't have these fcking floaters in my eyes I'd be so much better. Looking at the world through a film of black squiggly things makes the DR even more apparent.

You do get used to it but it doesn't get any easier. Not having the basic element of being human is somewhat debilitating. Oh and you get prone to sarcasm too.


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## Dreamer (Aug 9, 2004)

Life Sentence? said:


> 18 + years! I am accustom to it, but I will never get used to it or accept it!


I have to laugh, and this is no laughing matter, but someone says, "I thought I was mentally retarded", or "I thought I had X ..." We KNEW, and we KNOW there is something "wrong." What we are experiencing is NOT what we should be experiencing for such an extended period of time.

The very fact that it is UNCOMFORTABLE and causes problems with work/social activities, etc. is the very definition of some sort of pathology.

I have a bipolar/schizoaffective cousin. He is now 36, but he had a break around age 20 -- psychotic. BEFORE that time, he was the brother in his family who had trouble in school though he was bright enough to do very well, etc. He looks back now himself and considers himself as "different".

For me it has been the same. I didn't even realize the extent of VERY early childhood symptoms until later in my life. It explained some avoidance, terrible school performance, then excellent school performance, back in 2nd grade, etc.

*Think of this as chronic pain from arthritis or a serious sports injury or an accident. It is always "there" -- you don't ACCEPT it, you realize that you begin to live your life "around" it. Some days it is unbearable, other days you "forget", some days you fear it getting worse, etc.

The young woman who cuts my hair was in an auto accident. She is now 28. She will ALWAYS be in pain. (Unless some new treatment comes along). Some days she is very aware of it. Other days it "fades into the background", but it is always there. She's a very strong woman. Very active, very busy, very positive. Not all of us are.

And this is true of the other mental illness sufferers as well.*

I think a few here are trying to apply this logic to something that isn't going quite right in our brains. And again, I KNOW I am anxious and a worrier and was probably born that way. But as I see it, IN MY EXPERIENCE, I have my own way of dealing with this. Others have THEIR ways. Some do better than others.

*The question isn't "why do I still feel this way", I guess for me is "how do I best cope and still get the best out of life." And I spent YEARS, getting a B.A. and M.A. working in a demanding field, working many other jobs. Occupying myself endlessly. Keeping up socially as best I could. Getting married. None of these distractions has ever taken away the DP/DR. For me TIME has been a significant healer to a degree, and I'm 48.*

Also, was it in this thread something thought that "normal" people are "faking" and they feel this way too. Couldn't be further from the truth. How do I know this? How do we know this? Only people who experience understand what the Hell we're talking about.

We seek help for this. Those who aren't hindered or frightened by these symptoms don't seek help. They have no symptom to seek answers to.

Again, a book I recommend all the time, V.S. Ramachandran's *A Brief Tour of Human Consciousness* He has studied perceptual distortions including those from phantom limbs, and things like DP/DR, Cotards, Capgras, Deja-vu etc.

It would be like asking, and sufferers DO ask, "Doctor, why do I feel excruciating pain in a limb I no longer have?" Also a few mysteries -- individuals WHO WERE BORN WITH A MISSING LIMB, NEVER HAD ONE, experience phatom pain, or "feel" the missing limb. Individuals BORN BLIND experience deja-vu that is uncomfortable enough to seek a consultation at minimum.

As I've said 8,000 times here, and why I find neurology fascinating, is that the *brain is infinitely complex, we are infinitely unique, and yet we all share so much in common as those with other "disease" or "pathology" or "malfunction" -- how is it possible we all have such similar symptoms and other "healthy people" don't know what the Hell we're talking about and think we're lazy -- well some.*

If you talk with a neurologist, as I've had for another problem which has turned out to be no big deal, he/she knows immediately what DP/DR is. Or this has been my experience. My mother who was a psychiatrist in the 1960s/70s knew DP/DR in her patients immediately. However she failed to mention what she recognized in me as DP for years. She was ashamed of me. I hate psychiatrists.

Think of those individuals who lived alone with this in those days, and think of those in centuries before. I don't see this as something "new" -- if you note those with seizure disorders, brain tumors, stroke, head injury experienc DP/DR too. (among other things.)

Well I won't carry on. But I'm going to print out this thread and show it to my doctor whose mentor still doesn't get this and he's been a shrink specializing in trauma, dissociation, borderline for YEARS.

Many don't understand the HELL of the longevity of this illness.

And again, our symptoms are on a spectrum. Note some of us were born this way, others it started later in life, for some it is unbearable, for some it is a nuisance.

Man I get carried away. Forgive, lol! :shock:

I still think "I thought I was mentally retarded" is both hilarious, and very sad. A child KNOWS when he/she is truly different. A born blind knows "something is missing."

Did I mention I now hate psychiatrists? :?

Best,
D


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