# Can you describe your weed/marijuana/cannabis panic attack that made you have DP?



## hopefuluk2 (Aug 20, 2015)

Hello guys,

I created this thread for those who had a panic attack after smoking weed. It would be good if anyone can describe how their panic attack was. Mine was quite intense and it happened in Amsterdam. I was in a public place so I did not have a chance to relax in sofa or in bed. Only five minutes after smoking half a joint with my girlfriend, I became absolutely terrified, lost my vision and started hallucinating! I was semi-blind!. It took me and my girlfriend, who had the panic attack too, about three hours to go back to the hotel. I THOUGHT during the panic attack that we were dead and that we were in hell. After three to four hours of trying to find a way of transport to get back to the hotel because we were so disoriented, we managed to get a taxi back. We headed straight to bed. We slept and the next day, we woke up with a foggy brain and dream-state like. It was such a scary fucking experience! LIFE THREATENING EVENT because during the panic attack, I thought that we were dead and living in hell. The only thing that reassured me is that my girlfriend was with me and she was telling me that she is terrified too. So, we kept a company of each other. If she had not been with me, I could have committed suicide to stop that scary feeling and realise that I was not dead! Can't imagine how the brain will ever forget that traumatising experience. No wonder that people takes years to recover! Would like to hear from others if their panic attack was anything similar to mine?


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## Pixie (Sep 26, 2015)

You have my sympathies, because it can be really difficult to pull through and try to forget. Mine happened after taking only two hits from a bong with a few friends. My reaction was so strong and unbelievable that I was convinced that it was laced. Later on, after I realized no one else had reacted like I had, I thought I was losing my mind. I spent months halfway-convinced that I was "becoming" schizophrenic. When I found all these forums relating similar experiences with weed, I was so relieved. But yeah, my experience started with my vision, as well. Everything was turning in a corkscrew fashion, and it was absolutely nauseating and felt impossible to keep up with. I began slamming my hand on the table in synchronization with the turning of my vision. Suddenly I felt a thousand miles away, trapped inside my body but barely keeping a grasp upon it. I couldn't speak, and my ears filled with this music that I could only think to describe as something you would hear in hell - like you, I was convinced I was in hell. I was touching everything and everyone I could to try to FEEL anything, because I felt numb and 100% disconnected.

Eventually I had to go to the bathroom to vomit because of my vision, but I was barely able to walk, and spent the next hour leaning against the tub while my thoughts flew by so fast I could hardly grasp them, and it was my entire subconscious laid out - EVERYTHING, things I had forgotten, things I had suppressed, it all smacked me right in the face. Throughout it, I still could barely speak or physically feel anything. I felt like a prisoner in my body and it was absolute torture - I just wanted out. I was convinced that no one and nothing, including myself, was actually real. Everything was a prop in a play, and there was no meaning to it. None of what I had believed my entire life was true.

I made a post on here last night about my personal experience with Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder. It's been something I've dealt with since I was a kid - I don't have an official diagnosis, but I don't feel that I need one..... My experience with marijuana just pushed it all the way over the edge for a while, and over a year later I still have flashbacks. It sucks, but it does get better. Time heals.


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## Guest (Sep 30, 2015)

fuck i cant even remember it hardly. my heart was beating crazy and i was going crazy. apparently running around neighborhood naked. it was a horrific experience and i thought i was going to die. man.. after that first time, myself my life changed for the worse. 7 years later and still suffering immensely.

people thought it was laced with crack the way i was acting. i smoked alot and then it hit me the first time and i tried it again after 2 hits and it fucked me badly both times and had just had really bad panic attacks for a while after that. not sure why i did it again, someone convinced me. rarely now but i have the constant and chronic dp and related shit too that sucks

i never understood and people could smoke and just feel good and relaxed and what it did to me. now i kind of understand.


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## jotteff (Aug 11, 2015)

@hopefuluk2: Does that mean you and your girlfriend both experienced the same horror trip and you both have DP now?


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## forestx5 (Aug 29, 2008)

I was 17 and had never been high on cannabis. I had smoked previously on a few occasions without effect. I shared two joints with several friends, inhaling deeply a half dozen times. A few minutes later, I was sitting down when I felt an odd tug and painful jab in my abdomen. I stood up to examine myself when I felt a strong rising sensation of powerful anxiety from my abdomen to my chest. My heart began to beat wildly. I remembered having just smoked the cannabis, so I tried to calm myself and relax. The rising sensation continued from my chest to my head, making my head tingle strangely. Next, my hearing and vision became impaired. My own voice sounded detached, and the voices of others seemed muted. I lost the ability to track motion with my vision. The best I can describe it is that it were as if I were watching a slide show rather than a movie. The tingling in my head progressed to a cold numbness on the entire left side of my head. It was if someone had drawn a line down the middle of my head. The right side of my head was unaffected. The generalized tingling on the left side of my head intensified and congregated in the front area of my head, and then slowly "marched" to the left rear of my head. At that point, the proverbial shit hit the fan. Something inside the left rear of my head began to tense up like a clock spring being wound. When it could be wound no tighter, it released in a wave of electrical energy which sent a shock wave through my head and mind. At that exact instant, my vision distorted and "tunneled" as if I were suddenly looking through binoculars from the wrong end. This process of tensing, releasing, and vision tunneling took about 5 seconds, and it repeated itself on 5 second intervals for almost 2 minutes. It was horrific to experience. 
OK... long story short. I thought I was a normal person prior to smoking the cannabis. This incident introduced me to the world of mental illness. I fell into a deep depression, suffering severe insomnia and anxiety, depersonalization and derealization,and other psych symptoms. I have had several severe episodes of depression in my life. I have lost 30 lbs or more during an episode, and once went without any real sleep for almost 2 months. I suffered frequent panic attacks for over 20 years.

It took me almost 40 years to understand what happened to me during my cannabis incident. It was not a panic attack. The rising sensation from the abdomen is called an Epigastric Aura. It is a form of seizure and is a prodromal sign of an impending larger seizure. The numbness, tingling, and shock sensations are features of a temporal lobe seizure., and for two minutes I was in "status epilepticus" (repeated seizure activity). Today I know that my EEGs are abnormal, showing pathology in my left (dominant) temporal lobe. I'm now 60 yrs old and retired. I managed success at education, employment and life in general despite my illness. I did the best I could.

Good luck to you and thanks for reading.


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## Alex617 (Sep 23, 2015)

My first symptoms of DP/DR which lasted one night but the stress and anxiety from it has remained with me to this day (and eventually lead to a triggering of it for a long period of time). It was not marijuana however it was a street version of LSD, 25I-NBOMe. Only now I realize that it gave me symptoms of psychosis, in that I thought I had somehow 'hacked' reality and could do whatever I wanted, somehow I wasn't bothered by this. Only when something happened which made me extremely anxious (I made the mistake of going out on this stuff) I had a total breakdown of reality. This kind of cold feeling ran over me like I had suddenly become aware of something, I would see people as robots and I thought I had just fucked myself for life.

This was the most horrifying experience of my life, but luckily I had the love for my family and girlfriend to keep me grounded and get over the bad trip. The trauma of this experience lead to me searching for answers for the next 2-3 years, which only lead to my inevitable existential crisis and symptoms of DP/DR.

I have a lot of regret about this experience, and how much it took away from me. However the ironic thing is having this full-blown DP/DR is leading to me fully recovering and accepting things, so I can finally move on.


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## hopefuluk2 (Aug 20, 2015)

jotteff said:


> @hopefuluk2: Does that mean you and your girlfriend both experienced the same horror trip and you both have DP now?


We both experienced the same panic attack but she recovered and I ended up having Dp!


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## hopefuluk2 (Aug 20, 2015)

forestx5 said:


> Today I know that my EEGs are abnormal, showing pathology in my left (dominant) temporal lobe. I'm now 60 yrs old and retired. I managed success at education, employment and life in general despite my illness. I did the best I could.
> 
> Good luck to you and thanks for reading.


Thanks for your description forestx5. Did you take any medications? Did any help? Are you trying to say that that Cannibas panic attack caused you brain damage? EEGs abnormalities according to you. Did you have any MRI scan or CT scan that prove that? At the age of 60 now, do you still have DR/DP? How is it affecting you at this age?


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## forestx5 (Aug 29, 2008)

I should add that following the cannabis incident, I began to suffer frequent ocular migraines with aura, and my I developed heavy floaters in my vision. I was agoraphobic for a time. I did not receive a diagnosis or treatment for almost 20 years of suffering frequent panic attacks and migraines. I finally diagnosed myself with panic disorder, and was treated with an SSRI (Paxil). The Paxil eliminated my panic attacks which was a great relief. I have no reason to believe the cannabis caused brain damage. Everything I read suggests that cannabis is not harmful, and that cannabis does not cause mental illness. Demographic studies done in areas of high cannabis use do not show an increase in psychiatric illness. The apparent conclusion and explanation for experiences such as those in this thread, is that cannabis acted as a trigger for an underlying condition. I suppose I accept that explanation. I have had an MRI with an epilepsy protocol to rule out epilepsy, and I have had two EEGs which show significant non epileptiform abnormalities in my temporal lobe. Those abnormalities can be associated with "altered mental states". I only experienced DR for about a month following my cannabis incident, then it cleared. I still experience symptoms of DP, but it is largely associated with the recurrence of my major depressive episodes. I had a pretty rough year in 2014 and I was hospitalized and received a course of ECT. The ECT seemed to be very helpful and 2015 has been much better for me. I even have the motivation to do some cardio work and weight lifting. Currently, the only psych medication I take is escitalopram (Lexapro). I have tried a number of SSRIs in my life time, and believe that Lexapro is the cleanest SSRI available in regards to side effects. Thanks for your interest.


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## hopefuluk2 (Aug 20, 2015)

Hello thanks a lot again for an eloquent answer! Glad to hear that you managed to make it and have a successful life albeit with a lot of difficulties! My struggle just started after a mixture of stress + weed panic attack and a previous experience of traumatic stress disorder. It started in my 30s. Have not started any medications yet and planning to combat this on my own for a couple of years at least before I restore to medications route. You said that you got over your DR but still have DP. How do you describe your DP? Brain fog? Head pressure? Is your vision back to normal? You don't feel that you are in a dream like situation? Thanks again for detailed information!


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## Guest (Oct 7, 2015)

i dont even see how some of you guys can type your words and put words together properly i am so confused its like as soon as i got dp, my IQ dropped 75 points. my own unique feelings and personality is blown away. i cant feel anything but numbness and shit. and i have floaters everywhere and this heavy pressure in my head. my experiience in this 7 years is nothing i can even explain. i cant sleep at all i do have severe sleep apnea but cpap doesnt really help. my body is so rough and i am only 20. its just constant suffering every day i get no relief. these symptons are so intense im not bitching it is just so bad and i cant even explain it neurologically and cognitively. the DP blew up and its like i just got problem after problem after problem, low testosterone, secreted hormones i swear i didnt develop the way i should have. erectile dysfunction urethral stricture insomnia sleep apnea. cognitive deficits super high blood pressure. i feel like a concussed retired NFL football player. its just a blur i forget everything and i talk to these doctors and cannot explain myself. im so deprived and tired and this pressure in my head is insane everything is disorienting. i would kill myself but i have faith in god and im too much of a coward to do that anyway.

this has taken everything away from me. i am alone 24/7 being with other people does nothing for me but cause me pain. i feel like nothing i will say can explain myself. it does no justice to the complexity of these symptons. im not trying to bitch or moan but this is absolutely unbearable

dp is a big part of this but there is so much more it

i normally wouldnt write shit like this because i just embarrass myself but i know that a few with chronic DP may understand me at least a little bit.. i dont even understand myself.. at least more than people who dont know what DP and cant comprehend it


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## dpsucks (Sep 7, 2012)

InTheDark said:


> i dont even see how some of you guys can type your words and put words together properly i am so confused its like as soon as i got dp, my IQ dropped 75 points. my own unique feelings and personality is blown away. i cant feel anything but numbness and shit. and i have floaters everywhere and this heavy pressure in my head. my experiience in this 7 years is nothing i can even explain. i cant sleep at all i do have severe sleep apnea but cpap doesnt really help. my body is so rough and i am only 20. its just constant suffering every day i get no relief. these symptons are so intense im not bitching it is just so bad and i cant even explain it neurologically and cognitively. the DP blew up and its like i just got problem after problem after problem, low testosterone, secreted hormones i swear i didnt develop the way i should have. erectile dysfunction urethral stricture insomnia sleep apnea. cognitive deficits super high blood pressure. i feel like a concussed retired NFL football player. its just a blur i forget everything and i talk to these doctors and cannot explain myself. im so deprived and tired and this pressure in my head is insane everything is disorienting. i would kill myself but i have faith in god and im too much of a coward to do that anyway.
> 
> this has taken everything away from me. i am alone 24/7 being with other people does nothing for me but cause me pain. i feel like nothing i will say can explain myself. it does no justice to the complexity of these symptons. im not trying to bitch or moan but this is absolutely unbearable
> 
> ...


I can relate to this 100%.


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## hopefuluk2 (Aug 20, 2015)

InTheDark said:


> i dont even see how some of you guys can type your words and put words together properly i am so confused its like as soon as i got dp, my IQ dropped 75 points. my own unique feelings and personality is blown away. i cant feel anything but numbness and shit. and i have floaters everywhere and this heavy pressure in my head


I am so sorry to hear that inthedar. Did you try any medications? Any was helpful?


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## forestx5 (Aug 29, 2008)

My DP is probably best described now, as a symptom of my recurrent major depressive illness. I have experienced most, if not all of the typical DP symptoms. Head pressure, floaters, brain fog etc. I am usually an avid reader and I love most genres of music. However, when I am depressed I cannot read or listen to music. It is just too much effort for my fatigued mind. My most serious symptoms are insomnia and anxiety. I once went 52 days without real sleep. Every 2 or 3 days, I would experience a few hours of unconsciousness, but I wouldn't call it sleep. It was a horrible experience and I have read that insomnia and anxiety significantly elevate the risk of suicide. I can certainly believe that.


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## hopefuluk2 (Aug 20, 2015)

forestx5 said:


> My DP is probably best described now, as a symptom of my recurrent major depressive illness. I have experienced most, if not all of the typical DP symptoms. Head pressure, floaters, brain fog etc. I am usually an avid reader and I love most genres of music.


Has treating the depression with SSRI treated the brain fog and the head pressure? or not really? Do you still have brain fog/head pressure after all those decades? Since you are 60 now, do you mind asking me how DP/DR affected your everyday life? Did you manage to go to school? get a job? get married? etc? or has DP/DR fucked it all up? Sorry for too many questions!


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## Zikoubrown (Jan 3, 2020)

hopefuluk2, hi , how are you now


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