# Record yourself talking for 30 minutes



## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

Then play it back.

You will find out lots.


----------



## rob35235 (Feb 21, 2009)

Talking to who?


----------



## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

rob35235 said:


> Talking to who?


Well I have a program that records skype conversations, so I listened to a skype chat I had with a friend and it was very revealing.

You could of course just record yourself using the windows sound recorder


----------



## Pablo (Sep 1, 2005)

What did you find out? Was it worse or better than you thought ?


----------



## TheGame (Feb 1, 2011)

I did this too.

Its a little on the strange side. But what i found was that you come across as very normal and healthy even though you dont think so.

When your sitting there talking about this or that to a camera or something. telling your story. your always woorried that other will see right trough you and notice that you have all these weird sensations. but they are oblivious ofcourse. Since they are not in a similar state they could never know what you feel like.

Even so people will tend to notice when your spaced out or really panicy or anxious.

This is healthy because you get to see yourself from a helathy persons perspective. And then you realize. There's nothing wrong with me socialy or anything. Its just the way we percieve ourselves in DP. its actually one of the symptoms OF DP...


----------



## SaraBro (Feb 23, 2011)

TheGame said:


> I did this too.
> 
> Its a little on the strange side. But what i found was that you come across as very normal and healthy even though you dont think so.
> 
> ...


And this is why it's so hard to explain to people who never experienced it! They think you just feel depressed or something. And they don't understand the depth of the scary thoughts either. Maybe that's why depersonalization disorder is not as well known, cause it doesn't show, and the thoughts you get can occur in a "normal" person aswell from time to time.

But I think it's also good to have in mind, that you are completley normal, and not acting like a nutcase. Because there is just something of with the perception of yourself... it's almost like being drunk and people not noticing. You feel funny, but it doesn't show. I think it is parts of the brain not connecting with each other. I'm much better now in my DP, and it feels strange watching videos and pics of myself knowing I felt completley spaced out when they were taken. I look like I feel now, I just couldn't feel it then! I was myself all the time. I did everything I usually do, I had the same feelings, same taste in music... same everything. I WAS normal. I just didn't feel normal. That's the only thing wrong.


----------



## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

I actually heard a lot of sadness in my voice that I don't really consciously feel.

Where I thought I sounded relatively normal, there was a lot of pain that actually made me feel quite uncomfortable.

I then realised that I am constantly lying to myself about the way I feel. Fact is, when people ask me, 'how are you?' and I say, 'good yeah,' it's always a lie. The truth is that I feel numb basically all the time.


----------



## TheGame (Feb 1, 2011)

But people do notice that your troubled and depressed and shit. Man the frown on my face i used to have all the time before.

Now i smile alot more, laugh alot more and i feel more comfortable. because it is as you say a stress, anxiety not feeling great in your own skin kindof disorder.

But man life is gona be sweeters when its over. As i have said countless times before. EVERYTHING is going to feel better. literally everything.

Good thing summers comin around!


----------



## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

TheGame said:


> Now i smile alot more, laugh alot more and i feel more comfortable. because it is as you say a stress, anxiety not feeling great in your own skin kindof disorder.


Are you able to feel happy with DP?

I find that when I am laughing and smiling, there is often a part of me thinking, 'you're not really feeling this. This is kinda false.' Like I do always notice this real tension in my body and it makes it really difficult to feel comfortable and relax.


----------



## TheGame (Feb 1, 2011)

never_giving_up said:


> Are you able to feel happy with DP?
> 
> I find that when I am laughing and smiling, there is often a part of me thinking, 'you're not really feeling this. This is kinda false.' Like I do always notice this real tension in my body and it makes it really difficult to feel comfortable and relax.


Yeah sometimes i get that empty laugh feeling. And more often than not actually. But recently its beginning to feel better. More real and more rewarding to laugh. Watching funny clips help not take things so fucking seriously all the time.


----------



## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

TheGame said:


> Yeah sometimes i get that empty laugh feeling. And more often than not actually. But recently its beginning to feel better. More real and more rewarding to laugh. Watching funny clips help not take things so fucking seriously all the time.


Yeah the laughing thing has definitely got better for me too. It used to be really bad and laughing was actually really painful!


----------



## TheGame (Feb 1, 2011)

never_giving_up said:


> Yeah the laughing thing has definitely got better for me too. It used to be really bad and laughing was actually really painful!


What your jaws clenched or something? xD


----------



## never_giving_up (Jun 23, 2010)

TheGame said:


> What your jaws clenched or something? xD


There was so much tension in my chest that it just felt really uncomfortable. It's been feeling a bit like that recently but overall it's much better than what it was.


----------



## Guest (Apr 1, 2011)

People certainly "see" when I'm anxious or depressed. Explaining DP/DR is fairly useless. I have heard my voice recorded in a number of ways, and the anxiety comes out to me. I talk too fast, or I feel as if I have to "entertain" people. I've always been that way. Others notice I'm sort of scatterbrained sometimes, and at other times very social and diligent.

I wish I could freakin' relax. I try to talk more slowly and it seems unnatural to me. I try to use Mindfulness techniques all the time. "Stay in the moment. Slow down. Only NOW is what matters."

When the DP is horrendous I can't even move or speak. Haven't had a bad episode like that in about a year and a half. But at that time someone could see there was something wrong with me.


----------



## SaraBro (Feb 23, 2011)

TheGame said:


> But man life is gona be sweeters when its over. As i have said countless times before. EVERYTHING is going to feel better. literally everything.
> 
> Good thing summers comin around!


Not sure about that though... :/ When my dp/dr is almost off I feel like crap. Really depressed and empty. It's still better than full dp/dr. Guess my depression is just a result of the dp/dr... like the last step before recovery. Guess I'm not 100% recovered. Especially not today, hungover and shit... Bla.

Regarding the anxiety showing, I think when I'm panicing and feel really anxious it shows... but the dp/dr doesn't show... I feel strange, but when I look at videos of me I seem like an entity. It's the inside of me I can't control anymore


----------



## Another Name (Mar 18, 2011)

I did that. It's horrible. *I* can hear how deep I'm in DP/DR when I listen to me. Others surely won't, they just know me that way.


----------

