# WHAT?



## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

This may sound like invention, or something from my fiction. But I swear on my mother?s life, everything I am about to say is true. I understand if you nod and think its bull, but it is the truth.

On Saturday I went on a blind date with a woman. I?ll spare you the sordid details, but it went extraordinarily well. But here is what, despite my spectacular success with this gorgeous woman, I feel is more extraordinary.

To cut a long story short, I have known for a long time, and been told, that I have inherited my mothers ?spiritual talent/gift? for ?feeling? long dead emotions or ?spirits?, whatever the location. It scared me when I was young, but now me and my mother play a game of it whenever we go somewhere new. And to prove to people that we aren?t cheating, we write what we ?feel? on a separate piece of paper and then give it to each other or whoever is involved. We have a 100% success rate. Of course, I don?t believe it is spirits or whatever, I just think it is something we don?t yet understand.

Yesterday. Oh Christ. First off, it all began on the bus back to this woman?s house. We were talking about this ?talent?, and of course, my innate scepticism, and a woman in front said:

?Sorry, I couldn?t help overhearing you?.?, and we continued the conversation with her. The she asked me what I felt about her. And I swear on my life, I told her, this woman I had never met, the following:

That she was born on an island in the Mediterranean. Cyprus. The Turkish side. That she had once lived in Malta but was, for some reason, compelled to leave. I also told her that she had moved to England and back to Malta several times. And that there was a loss of ?something? that I would not tell her. She f******g cried, right there on the bus. Everything I said was true. How can that happen? Oh, and as we got off the bus I told her that she had a ?Y? in her name. Her surname she said, as she shook our hands, was Goodyear.

My companion, not to mention myself, was astonished at this, so when we got back to her house she wanted me to do the same. I did. After about three second in her house I told her that she had shed at lot of tears at the sink. A lot. Her eyes watered over but she said nothing and lead me into a room where, prior to me going in, she had removed something. I stood in the room, stared at the window, walked over to it and said: ?Something happens here.? Then SHE f******g cried. A real guttural sob. She reached into a draw a picked out a framed photograph of her late grandmother, who she regards as her Guardian Angel. She put it back on the windowsill and told me that, especially after her recent break-up from her violent, abusive husband, she stood on that spot and talked to the photograph, asking for guidance and help.

Four bottles of wine later and, after watching the UK fail miserably once again in the Eurovision Song Contest, the worst of all. She held my hand and asked me to tell me something about her. I told her some mundane stuff, that her father had black hair, that her stepmother had white (all true), and then, and then?oh lord, I started f******g crying. I felt a sudden, incredible sense of sadness. I said I didn?t want to say more, but she virtually pleaded with me. So I did. I told her that her dad is dying, and that she cannot conceive.

Her father has advanced prostate cancer. She has ovarian cysts, and cannot conceive.

WHAT THE F**K?

I?m a god dam parody of the kid that ?saw dead people.? I am a parody of everything I don?t believe in. And I don?t want it. I DON?T WANT IT.

Oh yeah, I nearly forgot about the final nail in the coffin of my sanity. Later on she also showed me a family portrait. But I could feel nothing. Except, as I said to her: ?Look closely at the photo, in the window behind you there?. She stared at the photo. There was a clear, life-size image of her dead grandmother in the window.

Oh, and another nail. An hour or so before I met my blind date, I bumped into an ex-girlfriend I hadn?t seen nor heard from in six years. In Cambridge, a city of around 150,000 people, and in the six years I spent there, I never once bumped into anyone I knew while out and about. Not once. It felt like it was a set up.

I will figure this out. I will!!!!!!!!!!! I must.

Edit: Perhaps the stuff with the woman on the bus was just lucky guesses, from her appearance and stuff. But how so specific? There are thousands of islands in the Mediterranean. 50-50 chance that she was Turkish Cypriot. I?ve never been to Cyprus, or known any Cypriots, but I have been to Malta. Unsure about the chances of randomly guessing that she had a ?Y? in her name, but the about the rest (Incidentally, I did get something slightly wrong. I said that she had spent a lot of time in a central European country. I said the Slovak Republic. It was Germany. The country next door!!!) I haven?t a clue. I also vaguely remember my companion telling me that she had ovarian cysts earlier in the evening and, perhaps, I?m not sure, that her father was ill. And she had told me that she had an abusive ex-husband, so perhaps it is natural that she would shed tears by the sink. As for the rest?s**t, I can?t figure it out.

But I will. It simply cannot be what I do not believe in. If it is, then I am well and truly screwed! 

Oh yeah, LOL, I also found a ten-pound note underneath a bench outside a church, just as I was dreading the long walk home. Spent it on booze and ****. It was a moral dilema though.


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

did you get your leg over though :?


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Yeah? Did you? In years before you would have given that info first! That was funny JC.



> But I will. It simply cannot be what I do not believe in. If it is, then I am well and truly screwed!


You are so screwed. Absolutely cannot wait to see the conversion. I imagine it will be shown on TV in the States.

That is strange. :shock:

But I now have things figured out a bit better. Your Mum is a saint and you are from the underworld. There you have it. And it can still work for
you. lol.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

8) Yes JC, I did. On a first date. I am such a goddam charmer. As she is an absolute stunner. I'm not sure if was my 'powers' that won her over, or the booze. Hmmm. Let's think.

She's beautiful and she wants to see me again soon. I hope this one works out, because apart from being physically spot-on, she's a great laugh too. There. I've put the mockers on it. Expect it to go disatersously wrong any day now.

Na Terri*, I think I've figured most of it out now. Reality has returned. But I'll keep an eye open for any more mysterious goings on.


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

maybe its just me but i find that if i manage to jump on a girl on the 1st date it puts me off,maybe im old fashioned


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

I was going to say that too, but thought better of it. Oh, she must be a slapper and me a typical bloke. But I'm not a prude and, to be honest, I don't give a s**t or feel the need to justify our behaviour. Besides, it wasn't exactly a blind-date, we knew each other, but this was the first date.



Oh bugger. I've just gone and tried to justify her/my behaviour. Never again.


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

lol

but why should there be this unwritten law that sex on a 1st date is a bad thing.......... sex is good sex is fun,enjoy it i say,just wish i was getting some action at the moment


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

> but why should there be this unwritten law that sex on a 1st date is a bad thing..........


I think there are hundreds of reasons. The common, typical British prudishness when it comes to sex. A woman's fear of being labelled a whore, etc. And of course religion sticks it's oar in somewhere.

Balls to it, literally, I say.


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## Epiphany (Apr 28, 2006)

Sex feels good for a reason...I'm sure that is no coincidence.

We are supposed to enjoy!!!

Go forth Martin and enjoy it...for those of us that are thwarted by the prudishness of society and are restricted by the constraints of marriage.

For some reason this all takes a lot of the fun away. I thought that may have been an urban myth but it does appear to be true. BooHoo for me!!!!

If I'm not getting the fun of it all it's great news that others are...(though Epiphany secretly sends poison-tipped daggers of jealousy Martin's way)!!!
:evil:


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

> And of course religion sticks it's oar in somewhere.


Row, row, row your boat.

Oh!! Excuse me. I was just heading back to the end of the que...again.


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## Axel19 (Aug 11, 2004)

I'm sorry I don't understand, are you complaining because you didn't think of iniviting the Cypriot chick back as well?

Seriosuly though I didn't really understand that story. You seemed to be continually reminding people of mundane facts about their families, which made them cry.
:?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Pardon? I never met these people before in my life. And the inability of this woman to concieve is hardly mundane. Or the fact that her father is dying.



> I'm sorry I don't understand, are you complaining because you didn't think of iniviting the Cypriot chick back as well?


But I understand your sarcasm and wallow in it. :lol: Oh, unless you are a total f**kwit, like me and usually mean what you say.

Besides, the cypriot woman had a face like a bull-dog licking s**t off a stinging nettle while 'The Thing' out of 'The Fantastic Four' was roughly sticking a finger up her arse.


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## Homeskooled (Aug 10, 2004)

Martin, 
You really dont want me to add anything to this post. You really dont. So, of course, I will. Some of the things you know about people are because you are extraordinarily perceptive. I'm quite sure you can tell people their tempermants quickly if you were a "psychic". Everything else, Martin? It isnt logically possible. I use the fact that I am extraordinarily attuned to people for my magic, and for praying for people, and for giving them counsel. And yes, it helps with women to be intuitive. But even then I never can tell people specifics. I beleive I have a mystical bent but am naturally perceptive. Theologically, I have three explanations that I find plausible. Here's the layman's version:

Being sensitive to the unknown is a supernatural gift. There is no natural way for you to "see" in someone's face, the way they talk, etc....(which is what I use to read a girl's tempermant, a person's card)....exactly what island they grew up on. Its a statistical, biological impossibility. In the supernatural, in almost all theologies (except perhaps some versions of the chakra system), the gift is from 3 sources. I'll give you the ones that jive with my Catholicism. (1) You have a mystical bent, one which could lead to a very deep prayer life, which you continually steamroll over using cynism and "logic". I put this in quotes for the obvious reason that it is more than likely flawed.  Padre Pio had this . I may have this to an extent. It is like God whispering to you if you listen (2) Secondly, it may not be God whispering. It can also be the "opposite team" if you will. Possessed people have knowledge of the unknowable. Its one of the four signs of possession. But there are various forms of demonic intervention, the least of which is oppression, and climbing further up the ladder in severity, obsession, possession, and perfect posession. (3) Lastly, it may be a neutral gift. Such as when a person thinks of a friend, and that friend calls you on the phone. A feeling of closeness to the invisible realm of the soul, and the ability to "feel" things which we all feel, but to a greater degree.

In my opinion, and in all honesty knowing you, I would say its a mixture of all three, plus a natural perceptiveness of people's bearing. Being that number two is rather serious, and you DO have a great deal of rage around holy things, you should pray about this. Other than that, this is a gift, and God may lead you to a calling using this to help others, and not just snag beauties.

Peace
Homeskooled


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

No no no Homeskooled, it is a stunning surprise that you responded to a thread of this nature! 

Look, I don't know why you are even bothering typing things about demons and possession and whatever. You should know by now that I absolutely do not, and will not, ever believe in them. If I ever saw one, or Jesus come to that, I would think I was hallucinating. I am more sure of that than my name is Martin.

1000 years ago people thought that thunder and forces of nature were the wrath of god. Now we know otherwise. If we brought someone back from, let's say, 200 years ago and showed them a television, they wouldn't run off screaming about black magic and satanism. We never learn. We always imagine that is must have a supernatural or paranormal explaination. Why is that? Why? Because things we do not understand MUST be supernatural. Yeah, right. That's like not understanding the Italian language and assuming they must be speaking in tongues or possessed by demons. Just because we don't understand it *yet.*

What happened to me, I am 99.9999% convinced, is a mixture not of possession and any power I might have as a psychic or sensative, but luck, astute guess from a part of my unconscious brain that I do not know about, and yes - the possibility that I may have some mild talent regarding percieving things that other may not.

It must be wonderful having all the answers Homey. But I for one feel comfortable not knowing. As Feynmann said: 'I was born not knowing and have changed that a little here and there'.


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## Homeskooled (Aug 10, 2004)

I bother in typing this stuff out because it is planting a seed. It doesnt matter to me that you beleive it, just that I type it. I feel you should know this (which means I am assuming, probably rightly, that your demonology and mysticism selection in your tomes is quite anemic), and I feel better once I tell you, because I've done my part. Its like my medical consulting. I tell people what they need to hear. Not what they want to hear, not what they hope to hear, just the truth as I've studied it. Thats all. Take me or leave. There's no room for subterfuge in my personality.

You know, its interesting that you brought up television. In Revelations, John speaks about a box with images on it that move. And he say that "people worshipped this idol". Interesting. So perhaps someone about 2000 years ago did indeed see one. Anyways, thats besides the point. As was said in the Usual Suspects " The greatest trick the devil ever played was to convince people he didnt exist." You admit that there are forces at work that you dont understand. Why not malevolent forces? You do beleive in malevolence, right? Thats not just an American thing, is it? 
:wink:

You say you think you'd be hallucinating, and act like this is ridiculous in _in the same thread that you've told me you see dead people._ Am I alone in seeing your inherent contradictions? You stand on some pretty shifty sands sometimes, Martin. Cant I be allowed to shed _some_ light on your obvious rationalizations of something that is obviously not logically possible?



> It must be wonderful having all the answers Homey.


I'll let you know how it is when I get there -I'm still working on it. interestingly enought, I'm typing this from a franciscan monastery I'm having a retreat at. I'll cover that in the Hope thread. Until then, _try_ to avail yourself of _some_ of what I know. I'm open to your gift just being a neutral, inexplicable thing. But I'm not going to sit idly by without telling you some possibilities that seem scary, or ludicrous, to you, just so I dont have to read your rants afterwards. Take some time to be humble enough to entertain these obviously ridiculous ideas of the ancients....they are, by virtue of having lived in the pre-modern area, inherently dumber than us, I know.....What was with that Plato guy? And Euclid? Who ever hears about his geometry thingy nowadays? Or the Catholic monk Gregor Mendel? What was with his old-fashioned idea of _ genetics_? By the way, I hope that the British can get blatant sarcasm, and it isnt just an American thing.....Now go pray and read about the mysticism of Padre Pio!

Peace
Homeskooled


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

> because it is planting a seed.


Seed? You are spilling your seed?



> your tomes is quite anemic


Surely you been my 'bones' are quite anemic. You're right there, my old friend.



> and I feel better once I tell you, because I've done my part. Its like my medical consulting


That makes me happy. And, believe it or not, I mean that.



> You admit that there are forces at work that you dont understand


Not in the sense you are trying to convey.



> Why not malevolent forces? You do beleive in malevolence, right?


Yes I do. But again, not in the sense that you are trying to convey.



> Take some time to be humble enough to entertain these obviously ridiculous ideas of the ancients


Extraordinary. You speak of contradictions, then ask me to be humble! Me, someone who admits he does not know all the answers. Yet you, who are certain of what is behind the causes of my experiences, and just about everything else, are not! You know!, or you are convinced you do. How, well, unhumble can one be? That, surely, is a contraction of biblical proportions.



> read about the mysticism of Padre Pio!


I have. It's boring. Just another tale in the long line of misunderstanding, fraud, religious fanatacism, weeping statues of the Virgin Mary....etc. I liked his beard though. Oh, and the way he managed to teleport to Montevideo.


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## Homeskooled (Aug 10, 2004)

Dear Martin, 


> Surely you been my 'bones' are quite anemic. You're right there, my old friend.


I know. This will hopefully improve as time after the chemo goes on.



> Why not malevolent forces? You do beleive in malevolence, right?
> 
> Yes I do. But again, not in the sense that you are trying to convey.


That sense would have been sarcasm.



> Extraordinary. You speak of contradictions, then ask me to be humble! Me, someone who admits he does not know all the answers. Yet you, who are certain of what is behind the causes of my experiences, and just about everything else, are not! You know!, or you are convinced you do. How, well, unhumble can one be? That, surely, is a contraction of biblical proportions.


Well, it is hopefully NOT a "contraction" of biblical proportions....I hear those are quite painful. Sorry. Okay, so I have a plethora of knowledge. I'm sharing it with you. I'm not promising answers. Just knowledge. As far as pride, humility or truthfulness goes, the ancients had an interesting grasp of them. Humility was considered a _defect_ of the virtue of pride. Virtue was "a means between two extremes, an excess and a defect, with respect to a particular action or emotion." Therefore, pride was a virtue, a "means between the extremes of vanity and excessive humility with respect to ones desire to receive great honors." and truthfulness was a " a means between the extremes of boastfulness and self-deprecation with respect to the way one presents oneself to others."So according to the _Nicomachean Ethics_, I am once again complimented by your appraisal of one of my virtues.

Peace
Homeskooled

PS-


> Just another tale in the long line of misunderstanding, fraud, religious fanatacism, weeping statues of the Virgin Mary....etc. I liked his beard though. Oh, and the way he managed to teleport to Montevideo.


Ah yes, much like the one I heard the other day about a man who rides trains in London and reads the minds of passengers while seeing their dead relatives....It _does_ seem a bit contrived, does it not? A bit like those silly saint stories of old.... :roll:


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## Milan (May 29, 2005)

Homeskooled said:


> Ah yes, much like the one I heard the other day about a man who rides trains in London and reads the minds of passengers while seeing their dead relatives....It _does_ seem a bit contrived, does it not? A bit like those silly saint stories of old.... :roll:


Ouch!

He has got you on that one Martin 8)

Can't wait for the next post by Marty.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Yeah, great. Oh, I'm so 'got'. Finally he understands the meaning of sarcasm, but, unfortunately, not how to apply it or when. My grandmother died at 9:30pm last night.

Just don't bother Homeskooled, just don't bother. Although saying that, I would be interested in seeing you develop your new found sarcasm in this respect.

But fantastic timing Homeskooled. Astonishing. Perhaps your psychic powers are a little faulty. Or perhaps they don't cross the atlantic. I know you didn't mean it, I mean, how could you possible know?

Mine aren't working.


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## Homeskooled (Aug 10, 2004)

Dear Martin, 
Grandmothers are special people. Mine passed away 4 months ago and my other one is dying. Please accept my condolences and my hope that her passing was peaceful and expected. Sometimes when we dont see it coming it is the worst. It is times like these, however, which often allow families to reconcile and grow. I hope this happens between you, your sister, and your parents, and that even in this time of sadness, you grow in peace and love. You, and your family, are in my thoughts....

Peace
Homeskooled


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Thank you Homeskooled.

Martin.


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