# Shit



## BabyBak (Feb 8, 2012)

I just wanna be back so bad. The weathers gettin nice and i just want to enjoy it. I miss lying in bed listening the peepers, my fan and the occasional drone of a plane flying over the wooded area outside my window. I miss waking up to the balmy air of the morning and feelin a sense of excitement and wellbeing as i turn on my back and think about what the day will bring. I miss everything so bad and i cant believe this shit happened to me. Practically everyone at my high school is gettin high after class and i would be that one fucker to enter a state of seemingly perpetual torture from a single blunt. Its funny how the depersonalization is a defense mechanism yet its ironically traumatic. After about 5 months im ready to be back. i would give anything........


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## Guest (Mar 21, 2012)

You're not the only one man....whats your story? What happened? It wont last forever man...


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## My storm ran out of rain (Feb 6, 2012)

I'm the same way! those used to be the senses that I love the most, the changing seasons! Thanks a lot God for taking that away from me! I still sleep with my window open so I can hear the frogs on the pond at night, but it does nothing for me


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## BabyBak (Feb 8, 2012)

I was pretty much normal....a little more anxious than ur average person but nothing i ever gave any serious thought about. I also have a mild stutter, most people dont even recognize it unless they really know me, but this gives me some social anxiety...but again nothing i cant handle. This shit started when i smoked for my third time with some friends. I had the classic weed induced panic attack. The feeling was so abstract and disturbing i freaked out (scared my friends shitless) and for a week i was stuck in dp land. One morning i woke up and it was gone. I was in paradise. Every moment was great and i said, fuck man i learned my damn lesson i wont go near weed any more no matter what. And i kept my promise. Sadly the day before christmas break i was driving home and I induced dp again.....like when u try to scare yourself in the mirror.....i just started almost tryin to relate to the feeling and BOOM it was back. Now its been like 4 months and its truly torture as im sure everyone on this site (or with dp) can relate. The fact that i recovered before gives me hope but this shit feels so wierd....like so trippy and unsettling....that its hard to keep ur head up. I always tell myself that if i recover i will face all of my other fears


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## DP boy (Mar 20, 2012)

BabyBak said:


> I was pretty much normal....a little more anxious than ur average person but nothing i ever gave any serious thought about. I also have a mild stutter, most people dont even recognize it unless they really know me, but this gives me some social anxiety...but again nothing i cant handle. This shit started when i smoked for my third time with some friends. I had the classic weed induced panic attack. The feeling was so abstract and disturbing i freaked out (scared my friends shitless) and for a week i was stuck in dp land. One morning i woke up and it was gone. I was in paradise. Every moment was great and i said, fuck man i learned my damn lesson i wont go near weed any more no matter what. And i kept my promise. Sadly the day before christmas break i was driving home and I induced dp again.....like when u try to scare yourself in the mirror.....i just started almost tryin to relate to the feeling and BOOM it was back. Now its been like 4 months and its truly torture as im sure everyone on this site (or with dp) can relate. The fact that i recovered before gives me hope but this shit feels so wierd....like so trippy and unsettling....that its hard to keep ur head up. I always tell myself that if i recover i will face all of my other fears


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## DP boy (Mar 20, 2012)

Im a month and a half into Dp and its some twilight zone bullshit brain defense mechinism that is making my life a living hell all my sysmtoms are full blown I walk around and I cant feel my body cant belive MJ finally fucked me over I never thought lol. Ive got insomnia from this and i cant even begin to recover until I get a ton of sleep every night. I belive this condition is very cureable and I know all of you have heard this a million times but anxiety is what keeps refreshing the DP ONCE YOUR ANXIETY IS ANNAILATED and I mean really annialted then the symtoms will gradually recide and one day reality will explode all around you and you wont be able nto really remeber what all this was like if you really recover. This does really suck the weather is getting beautiful and im traped in my mind.


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## Guest (Mar 22, 2012)

Ya man, the fact that you recovered once is a good sign


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## eppy105 (Feb 17, 2012)

BabyBak said:


> I just wanna be back so bad. The weathers gettin nice and i just want to enjoy it. I miss lying in bed listening the peepers, my fan and the occasional drone of a plane flying over the wooded area outside my window. I miss waking up to the balmy air of the morning and feelin a sense of excitement and wellbeing as i turn on my back and think about what the day will bring. I miss everything so bad and i cant believe this shit happened to me. Practically everyone at my high school is gettin high after class and i would be that one fucker to enter a state of seemingly perpetual torture from a single blunt. Its funny how the depersonalization is a defense mechanism yet its ironically traumatic. After about 5 months im ready to be back. i would give anything........


hey man I dunno if you remember me but you replied to my thread a little while ago saying that we're like "carbon copies" in terms of DP and personality and stuff. It seems like you're going through a rough patch right now...so am I. Everything will get better soon though...it's definitely an up and down experience. I totally relate and I hope everything else is well. 
-Jon


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## DP boy (Mar 20, 2012)

Hello Other World said:


> I'm the same way! those used to be the senses that I love the most, the changing seasons! Thanks a lot God for taking that away from me! I still sleep with my window open so I can hear the frogs on the pond at night, but it does nothing for me


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## DP boy (Mar 20, 2012)

Waddup man you had any progress latley


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