# My Path to Recovery



## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

Hey all.

Posted my story in a few other places around here. Basically, I have DP as a result of what I believe to be stress, as it came about with no other agressor.

Anyway, recently I've been combining meditation and hypnosis, along with just plain old relaxation in an attempt to fight the DP, and it seems to have been working.

One thing I've noticed recently, as everything begins to at least dwindle somewhat, is that the emotional detatchment that comes with DP, at least with me, is not as - indestructible, I guess? - as it makes us believe. We've grown so used to questioning everything that we break down feelings and emotions so much, as to make them meaningless. As difficult as it may sound, the real key to breaking through that is, well, to just ignore it. Let your emotions flow through and don't give them a second thought. Less calculating, more spontaneity, seems to be the key to it all.

Anyway, just my thoughts. March 5th is my deadline for beating DP, at least idealistically. The less idealistic one is April 10th, so wish me luck! And best to you all on your own journeys back.

And one thing that I think needs to be articulated a lot more: recovery from DP is a process that takes a bit of time. It doesn't just happen. But stick in there! Progress will come, as will recovery.

Don't fight the DP, let it flow!

Best to all.


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## ChrisPA (Dec 22, 2009)

I wish you luck Alex and almost agree completely with what you are saying. The only thing I would warn you about is setting an exact date for yourself to be "completely recovered." This condition is one of those things where it has many ups and downs and even when you are seemingly through it, it can come back in little waves. Putting such a big expectation on an exact date to never feel something again is kinda setting yourself up for a fall. You are putting a lot of pressure on a specific day and I am not sure if that's the right approach. I too was at the point where I thought I was completely 100% not going to have severe cases of DP/DR anymore, but I had a day where I slipped up for some reason and had bad anxiety. I think this was mostly due to my ignorance, as I started to drink caffeine heavily again which is the worst for those of us with anxiety problems which is what DP/DR is. Anyways, because I had it in my head that this would never ever effect me again, when it did I took a pretty harsh set back for a little while and had DP/DR spurts now and again after it. Your enthusiasm and positive outlook on getting out of this is awesome, and you are definitely going to succeed. I just want to help in a way I guess because if you recognize the DP/DR and "let it flow" as you say and just naturally fade away, you won't be as alarmed as I was if it happens to come back at all. Either way, good post, and I too am just about completely over it and am hoping for a complete elimination of the DP thoughts in the near future.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

ChrisPA said:


> I wish you luck Alex and almost agree completely with what you are saying. The only thing I would warn you about is setting an exact date for yourself to be "completely recovered." This condition is one of those things where it has many ups and downs and even when you are seemingly through it, it can come back in little waves. Putting such a big expectation on an exact date to never feel something again is kinda setting yourself up for a fall. You are putting a lot of pressure on a specific day and I am not sure if that's the right approach. I too was at the point where I thought I was completely 100% not going to have severe cases of DP/DR anymore, but I had a day where I slipped up for some reason and had bad anxiety. I think this was mostly due to my ignorance, as I started to drink caffeine heavily again which is the worst for those of us with anxiety problems which is what DP/DR is. Anyways, because I had it in my head that this would never ever effect me again, when it did I took a pretty harsh set back for a little while and had DP/DR spurts now and again after it. Your enthusiasm and positive outlook on getting out of this is awesome, and you are definitely going to succeed. I just want to help in a way I guess because if you recognize the DP/DR and "let it flow" as you say and just naturally fade away, you won't be as alarmed as I was if it happens to come back at all. Either way, good post, and I too am just about completely over it and am hoping for a complete elimination of the DP thoughts in the near future.


Yeah, I understand what you mean. I know that I may not reach it by my deadline (it's unrealistic) but I figure if I have that date in my mind, I'm more likely to keep my resolve against the DP up, rather than just making some indescript "future" my goal.

And yeah, I also get the overconfidence thing. It's happened to me before (had this for about 2 years now) so I'm trying to maintain a healthly level of confidence. Which brings me to another point... I've found that lack of confidence also plays a role in DP. Like, less confidence in oneself will make it worse... Just an observation, but has anyone else had this? But anyway, focusing thoughts more positively seems to help as well, overall.


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## Tommygunz (Sep 7, 2009)

i kinda like the approach of setting a date. i think potentially if you enforce in your mind enough that it would possibly have a subconscious programming effect. as though your mind will know that on said date it will turn DP/DR off. that and not setting a time frame could potentially allow DP/DR to linger for a while longer than you want.


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## Xerei (Feb 17, 2010)

wish ya luck, U CAN DO IT!!!
have faith in urself, and ur recovery, jzt by living with DP u have shown urself as a strong person!


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

Thanks for the words of encouragement







.

As for what Tommygunz said: That's exactly what the reasoning behind picking a date was. Because I've tried the "just ignore it" method for... months, really... and it didn't really seem to be progressing any. Not that there's no help in ignoring the DP to a certain degree (it seems to be one of the most important things) but DP is also beat by noticing the weaknesses of the DP. Of which there are many. It just seems like there aren't any because of the long time periods that most of us have had this DP for.

Like, because I've had this for 2 years, it seems "normal" now... so in a way, we actually need to enter an altered state of mind again in order to fight the DP, because this altered state would be, well, the "non-DP" state of mind, for lack of a better term. If any of that just made sense to anyone. Haha.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

It's been a few weeks since I really started "recovering" I think, but in any case there is a marked improvement. I'm starting to feel a bit sharper and my vision is improving. I still see flat colored backgrounds (specifically things like the sky and snow) as seeming somewhat "pixelated" (anyone else had this?), but that's improving too. The fatigue is lessening, and I'm beginning to feel as if I have control over the DP.

All that leaves is a bit of brain fog and, of course, the emotional dampening, as well as the increase of DP under fluorescent lights/computer screens. Still trying to find a good solution for these, but I figure these will also resolve themselves with time. But yes... it's improving! Finally!

On a side note... has anyone heard about something called the "default mode network"? I heard about it in Scientific American, and apparently it deals with conciousness and awareness... I was thinking that this could perhaps be linked to DP?


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## easyreader (Jan 25, 2010)

Tommygunz said:


> i kinda like the approach of setting a date. i think potentially if you enforce in your mind enough that it would possibly have a subconscious programming effect. as though your mind will know that on said date it will turn DP/DR off. that and not setting a time frame could potentially allow DP/DR to linger for a while longer than you want.


I think the panax ginseng has damaged your brain cells.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

easyreader said:


> I think the panax ginseng has damaged your brain cells.


What?


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## easyreader (Jan 25, 2010)

AlexXD said:


> Thanks for the words of encouragement
> 
> 
> 
> ...


you're thinking too much. think less.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

easyreader said:


> you're thinking too much. think less.


Easier said than done. =P


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

Did two thirty minute meditations (with music), one today and one yesterday... and I think they've really helped!

I'm feeling the best I have in a long time. Have had periods where emotion rushed back. It's wonderful.

To any second guessing: yes, there is hope. Recovery comes slowly, but it comes.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

Haven't been on here for a while: trying to avoid DP thoughts. But I've been having some breakthroughs.

Built something called a Dreamaching (finally). For those of you who don't know what that is...: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreamachine

Well, it's supposed to affect the brainwaves, to make people calmer. And I think it's been working.

My DP has been markedly improving. For the past two days, I've had strong emotion again. And how wonderful!

I'm not saying that it was my entire cure, this dreamachine, but it definitely helped. Along with my "deadline" (April 5th, my first deadline, was the day that I began to feel much better. Could be related.)

Anyway, I've had some questions for some other recover-ers:
1. While in the process of recovering, do you feel extremely tired? Such is how I've felt... Almost drained, but in a good sort of way.

And 2. How long have your floaters stayed around (assuming you've HAD floaters, or visual snow)? Mine have been improving with everything else, but I was just curious.

Might not be back for a while, in order to avoid DP thoughts. But thanks to anyone who responds. And best of luck to you all!!


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## Tommygunz (Sep 7, 2009)

i experienced (and at times still do experience) fatigue throughout the recovery process. i'm sure there are a laundry list of possibilities for why recovery is exhausting but i have never really taken the time to figure it out. as far as the floaters. they nevr go away because they are cracks in the vitreous of th eye and can only be repaired with surgery. fortunately they do get somewhat better and as the obsessive tendencies of DP diminish, so does your noticing them. the brain is naturally good at not registering things like floaters. we just notice them because we hyper-analize every single pixel and frame of our vision. so as you recover from DP the floaters stay the same, but you being aware of them goes away.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

Tommygunz said:


> i experienced (and at times still do experience) fatigue throughout the recovery process. i'm sure there are a laundry list of possibilities for why recovery is exhausting but i have never really taken the time to figure it out. as far as the floaters. they nevr go away because they are cracks in the vitreous of th eye and can only be repaired with surgery. fortunately they do get somewhat better and as the obsessive tendencies of DP diminish, so does your noticing them. the brain is naturally good at not registering things like floaters. we just notice them because we hyper-analize every single pixel and frame of our vision. so as you recover from DP the floaters stay the same, but you being aware of them goes away.


Yeah, haha, that was what I meant. I think most people have floaters, just none of them really notice them at all, because they're not overanalyzing. My question was mainly do we stop noticing them as we heal (ie. will my vision go back to what it was before DP), to which the answer appears to be yes.

Another day gone by. I still feel a bit fake, my actions and my emotions, but I attribute this to the fact that I still have to become used to them. Still improving. Bit less fatigued. Great improvement overall... I'm just hoping it'll continue on this way. =D


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## nix (Feb 27, 2010)

Floaters don't have anything with DP and they are actual a physical problem, but nothing dangerous at all. Most of people have them. Just don't pay attentions to them. I have floaters for years and I know for sure that they are not related to DP/DR at all.


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## AlexXD (Jan 6, 2008)

nix said:


> Floaters don't have anything with DP and they are actual a physical problem, but nothing dangerous at all. Most of people have them. Just don't pay attentions to them. I have floaters for years and I know for sure that they are not related to DP/DR at all.


Not directly, no, but through DP we pay much more attention to them. People without DP don't see them (or see them sparingly) because they're looking beyond them, tuning them out.


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## Cathal_08 (Apr 7, 2008)

please floaters are very common with DP, so of course its related!!!
its part of dp, i didnt one day decide i want see floaters all the time!


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## nix (Feb 27, 2010)

Cathal_08 said:


> please floaters are very common with DP, so of course its related!!!
> its part of dp, i didnt one day decide i want see floaters all the time!


lol... floaters are not part of DP at all. When you get out of DP you will still see them. Educate yourself before saying something that is actualy not true:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floater


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## Mario (Oct 26, 2009)

nix said:


> lol... floaters are not part of DP at all. When you get out of DP you will still see them. Educate yourself before saying something that is actualy not true:
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floater


Yes,this is true.Floaters are not part or symptom of Dp.Anyone can have floaters.I know a lot of people who have floaters and they don't have DP.
I myself have floaters as far as i can remember,and my Dp/Dr "only" started 6 years ago.


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## Tommygunz (Sep 7, 2009)

actually floaters are caused by stress, many doctors believe thats why they appear so much more frequently in stress and anxiety related issues. DP causes stress and eye strain therefore indirectly, DP causes floaters. i'm ot saying DP is the only cause of floaters of course. i'm just saying DP can absolutely increase the amount and intensity of floaters. i know for a fact that i developed a new floater about six months ago right in the center of my right eye. i know it wasn't there before, it is to big to have missed. i also know DP is related to the cause because it was about a week before i found out what DP was and i was stuck in panic mode and stressing and freaking out really bad that week.


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## nix (Feb 27, 2010)

Actualy, I don't believe at all that DP can cause any physical damage like floaters in eyes. When eyes get older, the more floaters people usualy have. At first, we see them, but after some time we get used to them and right now with DR I am so screwed that I don't notice them at all. 
I think that people with DP pay so much attention to every symptom that they actualy notice floaters more than they did before. 
Floaters can also be a symptom of something much worse connected with eyes, but in 99,9% they are completely harmless. 
If anyone has some new floaters, he should go to ophthalmologist and not to psychiatrist.


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## Tommygunz (Sep 7, 2009)

i totally agree that DP makes you notice them more because we hyper-analize everything. but the stress that DP causes emotionally, causes physical stress and tension that can cause floaters. kinda like a chain reaction. it's why eye strain is so common with DP. the emotional stress is causing physical tension.


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## Cathal_08 (Apr 7, 2008)

i know anyone can have them but the fact is most people with dp get lots of floaters, so it IS related!


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## guest1234 (Mar 23, 2010)

Cathal_08 said:


> i know anyone can have them but the fact is most people with dp get lots of floaters, so it IS related!


I reckon it is probably more likely that they just notice them more personally. I never got that particular symptom but then there are so many that it's a good thing everyone doesn't get all of them all the time!


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## Findyourself1997 (Aug 6, 2020)

Did u recover from eye floater or did u see any people who recovered from eye floaters ?


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