# what dp actually is



## eddy1987 (Dec 13, 2008)

Believe it or not, depersonalisation is actually a very interesting condition! It is extremely common ? in fact, it?s the third most commonly experienced psychiatric symptom (so always remember, you are not alone! Somebody else has almost certainly already had any and every nasty, nonsensical thought that DP pushes into your mind!).
Almost everyone experiences some level of depersonalisation at some point in their lives. It can be brought on for many different reasons, most often because of some sort of traumatic experience: A car crash, the death of a loved one, a bad drug experience, even a panic attack.
Now, DP usually lasts for the duration of the trauma, and for a brief time afterwards. But for some, like myself, it can stick around for much longer than that. Why does this happen to some people and not others?
Well, as I?ve said, DP kicks in for almost everyone who is involved in a traumatic experience. But it does so for a good cause ? that is, to emotionally ?remove? the person from the dangers that are present in the

environment (the fire, car crash etc) so that they can ignore the feelings of fear etc that would normally cripple them, and act rationally; to get out of that burning house, crashed car etc.
Now, for most people, the DP dissipates naturally when they are out of the traumatic situation ? but this is not always the case. In just the same way that some people are more susceptible to depression or anxiety than others, it seems that some people are more susceptible to DP than others. They can become aware of the feeling of being ?outside yourself? that DP causes ? and say, ?Hey - wait a second, why am I feeling like this?? That unease creates more anxiety and fear (which is now actually focused on the feeling of DP), with the result that the DP is not able to dissipate as normal. It turns into a cycle of more DP and more fear ? generating the thought habit that becomes the actual condition.
This seems to be quite common for people who suffer from panic attacks, since there is no ?visible? danger around. In that case, the person experiences DP as normal (as a reaction alongside the panic attack) ? as they should ? but since there is no obvious threat in the environment, they think that these feelings of ?unreality? shouldn?t be there. After all, there is no visible danger to escape! Understandably, the person might get very afraid of these feelings, and even think they?re going mad ? whereas nothing of sort is actually happening.
So there are a variety of causes, but what is common to each case is that the person at

some point focuses on the DP, and tries to understand why they are having these feelings. This makes the DP worse, just as focusing on any thought gets it stuck in your head (even a catchy song!). It doesn?t get a chance to go away, simply because the person won?t allow it to do so. There is no longer a fire or car crash (or in the case of a panic attack, there was nothing in the first place) to which you can attribute the feelings of unreality, so you wonder, ?when is this going to end?? ? when the truth is that having that very thought is what prolongs the DP. This feeling, which is only supposed to last minutes at most, can, when focused on, turn into a thought-habit that may last for hours, days, months etc with no relief at all.
Interestingly, there hasn?t been much psychiatric research into the condition. This is partly because it has been so difficult to define for so long, and also because in the vast majority of cases, the depersonalisation is a secondary symptom caused by some other trauma. And once the root of the trauma has been dealt with, by whatever means, the depersonalisation usually resolves itself.
What prolongs DP beyond the natural reaction to a stressful situation is that it forms into a habit of thought that can persist or recur over time. This happens because during the initial onset of DP, the environment around you seems to become more threatening. Though there is no visible danger, it is how you perceive things that creates the stress.

DP can quickly generate from this a negative thought-habit. The amygdala, the part of the brain that registers fear, is told that the individual is in great danger. You look around you and see no threat ? no bears, spiders etc! But you are still fearful and anxious. So the amygdala must register your very environment as dangerous. You might say that it has nowhere to go, nothing to focus on; there is nothing specific to be worried about, so the fear is projected onto anything and everything. Suddenly, your kitchen or bedroom can seem terribly frightening. You know deep down that there is nothing to be afraid of here ? but the fear itself won?t accept that.
This is a deeply confusing and scary feeling, and for me at least, it was like nothing I had ever felt before. People often come to the conclusion that they must be going crazy. Why else would this crippling fear of nothing at all come upon them? Of course, they are not going crazy ? the body is simply reacting properly to what it perceives as danger. This also makes the fear self-perpetuating; there is no threat, so you assume that something is wrong with your mind. This in turn generates more fear ? still with no threat around. This can quickly spiral out of control into a full-blown panic attack (not to mention the establishment of DP thought-habits).
That is one aspect of DP that can be particularly frustrating: the fear and anxiety has nowhere to go and nothing to focus on. The result is that more and more fear builds until it even gets projected onto even the philosophical thoughts that inspire wonder

rather than alarm in most people ? questions like, ?Why am I here??, ?Who am I?? etc. The fear can?t find anything to focus on in the environment, so it eventually focuses back on the individual ? and suddenly makes thoughts that others usually enjoy or take for granted seem unreasonably frightening.
All of this contributes to the DP sufferer getting caught in a cycle of self-observation and analysis. Every little twitch, itch and movement becomes something to fear. The sufferer becomes overly aware of their body and mind, so analytical of each sensation and movement that the inattentive ease of normal functioning is diminished. These analytical thoughts can become very intense, even so much so that they can actually feel like a ?barrier? between the mind and body, to the point where the body, or parts of it, don?t even feel like they belong to the person anymore.
Now I know, as I?m sure you do too, that living like this on a day-to-day basis can be very difficult. It wears you out, both intellectually and physically. And of course, being in a weak physical and mental state diminishes your defences all the more, further building up the negative thought-habits. All of this contributes to a bad pattern of thinking that can very quickly become part of your everyday routine.
all is reversible

ONCE YOU ARE RECOVERED YOU WILL LOOK BACK AND THINK ..WHAT WAS I THINKING


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## usedtobe (Sep 8, 2007)

One of the best posts i've read.

I believe you are spot on in everything you have said. How to get rid of it is the question. I have started therapy and my doc is treating this as a trauma (panic attack on shrooms and weed).

I am now forever in a fog and feeling like a lost soul.


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## Shyf (Nov 5, 2008)

Very thorough and interesting post indeed. Thanks.


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## eddy1987 (Dec 13, 2008)

good question how to get rid of it?

if you see it for what it is and accept it....what more can i say ...it will slowly diminish. 
fighting against your own defence mechanism is not going to get you anywhere just make you worse.
also thinking about it is also going to make it worse. 
therefore see it as your brain forcing you to relax ........and accept. 
carry on with life ...i know its hard but dp is a habit formed from the fist time it happened to you because you had non idea what it was maybe you was anxious or maybe had some sort of shock. ....always thinking about it ...is what makes it happen....while you are distracted its not there hence take your mind off it completey. slow steps will be better than lookingfor the quick fix.

most people think that when they are recovered they wont be the same person they were before....but from what i hear it makes you a stronger person and thinking the things you are now will seem silly once recovered.


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## meminusme (Dec 19, 2008)

good insight  . i tried having a "sit-down" w/my aunt about why ive been acting so different the past few months, and to my surprise she said it happens to her "all the time" because of some childhood experiences--which surprised me because shes definitely a sharp-thinking, very sociable person, and has a 99.7 average in her nursing course. i on the other hand didnt sign up for a 2nd semester of college because i feel braindead. so i guess its more common in different forms than it seems.... but i wish i could just voluntarily turn it on and off like she claims to do


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## Guest (Dec 20, 2008)

eddy1987 said:


> fighting against your own defence mechanism is not going to get you anywhere just make you worse.


Good post and above quote is an excellent point.See not everyone who experiences trauma becomes Dp,d, the ones that do are the ones who fight and resist other normal healthy coping mechanisms because they want to control their reality because of the perceived fear/Anxiety. Anxiety is normal to a degree also but when anxiety becomes persistent , these normal coping mechanisms are sometimes not enough to cope with it .....Instead of dissociating from the problem in normal said healthy ways we want to control instead rather than let go-there comes the obbessing-the need to put the mind on something to control it and to keep control-you fear not putting your mind to it, not obbessing because you think if you stop you will go crazy or lose control and it will become worse if you dont watch it or keep your eye on it.While controling reality that much with our minds- it cant be real, it can not be as it is. This need to control is in us long before the Dp,d comes along thats why when trauma happens-we dont let go or dissociate in a healthy normal way.-We become unreal by controling and not letting go-by altering our experience that way.



> most people think that when they are recovered they wont be the same person they were before....but from what i hear it makes you a stronger person and thinking the things you are now will seem silly once recovered.


You are the same person when you recover and youre not, obviously youve changed as a prerson, Just like as you arent the same now as when you was three or ten years old....you change and grow...but it feels normal.You no longer feel disconnected from the memories of your past or who you were/are.It does make you a much stronger person for sure but youre still human.When you have Dp,d you think to yourself "If I ever recover I wont be scared of anything ever again" I thought that but its not true.You dont become some kind of superwoman/man-you are human-youll have fears still the same as everyone else does but you are better at coping with them-youll feel happy and feel sad sometimes.....and experienvce every other human trait/flaw/quality.....BUT since recovering the universe has become a pretty amazing beautiful awe inspiring place, to feel it again , to breath its air, to see it not through a glass screen, taste, touch, smell, communication everything, every human trait, at the same time as being normal all of these things in a way become quite special/valued and are never taken for granted, ever again.To feel alive again is awesome and you find an appreiciation that only the heart can know.


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## eddy1987 (Dec 13, 2008)

good points from spirit...by the way have you recovered?

another thing i would like to say is there are so many people who expereince it and get dp often but it doesnt bother them like it does us and they just dont go on about it all the time so no one knows only them ...because we are anxious people...we think we have gone mad or wont be the same again.....we are exagerating it untill it becomes habit and then the cycle continues. 
dp should last minutes but we have made it last months years just by obsessing about it.
everyone just accept it ...if its gonna kill ya let it ...if its gonna make you crazy let it...accept all thoughts and feelings and carry on with life...fair enuff you will feel it for a bit ..but it will fade and the thoughts and feelings will go if you let it be there without fearing.

iknow alot of people close to me who get bouts of it...but they never let it bother them....plus noone else knew they had it ...because they dont have a reason to tell people...unlike us. my own brother has had it since the age of 14 ..and now he is 29.i never knew until a month ago untill i told him of my experience..he just laughs it off and tells me to do the same...i should feel better than him because myne was due to anxiety and hes had it just naturally since a young age ...but because of anxiety it becomes ten times worse to us.


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## hope4better (Jul 31, 2008)

VERY helpful posts here thanks for them! I agree for me I was a very fearful child and very alone in my head--later I'm aware of how controlled I tried to be/feel/seem/appear to self and others cuz of so much Anxiety! I love this forum--I ask a question or concern in another thread sometimes--then let go and surf around and BAM my answer appears where I wasn't looking. Thanks again,
--jake


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## lostsheep (Aug 6, 2009)

these are all very encouraging, this gives me the motivation to go to the pool party i was avoiding today =]


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## fuenteselaine (Sep 4, 2009)

Hi Guys,
According to my knowledge, Depersonalization is a malfunction or anomaly of the mechanism in which an individual has awareness or perception of his or her own self. A person removes his sense of personal identity or individual character from something.


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