# ANYONE EVER BEEN AFRAID TO COME OUT?



## nofear91 (Nov 27, 2010)

Ok, so i feel like I may be the only person who has ever felt this way .. if you have felt this way too please let me know!
I've been depersonalized chronically for two months straight. I'm working on coming out of it.
I'm definitely far from coming out of depersonalization, but now .. I'm nervous about what it will feel like to come out of depersonalization. I'm afraid of it/that I won't be able to handle it.
Has anyone ever felt this way?? If you have please reply..I could really use the help.


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## meta_synthesis (Nov 27, 2010)

nofear91 said:


> Ok, so i feel like I may be the only person who has ever felt this way .. if you have felt this way too please let me know!
> I've been depersonalized chronically for two months straight. I'm working on coming out of it.
> I'm definitely far from coming out of depersonalization, but now .. I'm nervous about what it will feel like to come out of depersonalization. I'm afraid of it/that I won't be able to handle it.
> Has anyone ever felt this way?? If you have please reply..I could really use the help.


I think it is a delaying mechanism that is doing the talking there.

I don't feel you'll ever get to the point with that story going on, where you experience, "OK! I got confidence now in the *UNKNOWN* so I can finally make that leap!" And then jump with a smile on your face.

Only in the movies









Just jump in. Close your eyes and jump. Everything else puts it off. You're going to have to jump at some point, or not at all. Why not just get it over with? Trust me.

And if I'm wrong, and you jump, and it ends horribly for you....

Then my bad. Hunt me down and ring out my neck.


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## nofear91 (Nov 27, 2010)

meta_synthesis said:


> I think it is a delaying mechanism that is doing the talking there.
> 
> I don't feel you'll ever get to the point with that story going on, where you experience, "OK! I got confidence now in the *UNKNOWN* so I can finally make that leap!" And then jump with a smile on your face.
> 
> ...


Yeah I get what you are saying. I can't believe there are people here that have been like this for years. I can barely handle two months. A lot of people seem to have it where they only experience in episodes where as mine is everyday all day, from the minute I wake up to the minute I fall asleep. I don't know how to get rid of it, but I'm praying I won't have it for years...that freaks me out.


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## BlackParasol (Nov 25, 2010)

nofear91 said:


> Yeah I get what you are saying. I can't believe there are people here that have been like this for years. I can barely handle two months. A lot of people seem to have it where they only experience in episodes where as mine is everyday all day, from the minute I wake up to the minute I fall asleep. I don't know how to get rid of it, but I'm praying I won't have it for years...that freaks me out.


For most it is episodic - but I've had it for several weeks straight before. Not exactly two months, but it is unbearable. Just hang on, it WILL lessen and get better.


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## Guest (Nov 28, 2010)

nofear91 said:


> Ok, so i feel like I may be the only person who has ever felt this way .. if you have felt this way too please let me know!
> I've been depersonalized chronically for two months straight. I'm working on coming out of it.
> I'm definitely far from coming out of depersonalization, but now .. I'm nervous about what it will feel like to come out of depersonalization. I'm afraid of it/that I won't be able to handle it.
> Has anyone ever felt this way?? If you have please reply..I could really use the help.


Hi nofear,
A funny thing happened to me last week. I woke up at 5 am to get ready to go to work. I noticed something unusual. I wasn't dissociating. My head felt clear. Hmm. I carried on in autopilot, got myself ready and off I went to work. When I arrived at work my head still felt clear. I started to smile. I smiled a lot. By lunch I was over the moon with my new found clarity. I was so happy with the way I felt, I mentioned to a couple of work mates, how good I felt. I commented they didn't know how lucky they were to be 'normal'. Ha. I don't think they got it. They definitely didn't get it! 
So, to respond your concerns about how you're going to handle it when the DD's gone? Don't worry about it! You will be too busy feeling wonderful. You won't look back! You will feel a great sense of relief. You will feel great that it's gone!
Unfortunately for me the next day it was business as usual. My DD came back with a vengeance. Bugger. Still it was a taste of things to come!
Take care,
Philos


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## Tommygunz (Sep 7, 2009)

If it helps at, recovering feels awesome. It's like all the stress and baggage you've been carrying around just melts away. Everything goes back to feeling smooth relaxed and comfortable.


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## Snivlem (Sep 3, 2011)

I keep getting these moments where I have a thought, usually something random, and I feel a jolt go through my brain. It's not painful, but it's exhilarating and also a little unsettling. I've changed a lot; I eat 90%+ nonprocessed foods, exercise most days, quit smoking cigs, cut down drinking, take meds, and also take supplements that seemed like they might be beneficial. I explained the sensation to a friend who went through DP and he said it sounded like the onset of a panic attack, but I've never had that before. I was hoping it was a flash of clarity rapidly followed by a quick "NO GO" from my brain. Does any of this ring a bell for anyone?


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