# why the lack of senses?



## livinginhell333 (Feb 19, 2005)

i don't get why i can't feel anything, like touches or kisses or massages don't feel good. neone else get this? i prefer people not to kiss or touch or hug me or whatever because. i've lost my senses too. i can't properly feel things when i touch them, like these keys or like a cup in my hand or like eating utensils. also i can't smell jack shit. nothing smells good and nothing smells bad either, but i can't smell. i can taste but not really. i really wish i can taste fully, and smell and touch, and i wish music and other things sounded good, but i get nothing. why? why is this? is this lack of senses something with the brain. is there a reason i can't feel these. nothing. and nothing. does neone know any good doctors cuz this is killing my family espiacially my mom and i dont feel anything, like i don't care about crap nemore. what should i do?


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## LOSTONE (Jul 9, 2005)

livinginhell333

I am just wondering what drugs you might have done or are now doing?

It sounds like you have gotten into some psychedelics.

These are the kinds of symptoms I used to have during my drug use and for about 6mo-1year after I quit.

I still get bad flashbacks but they come and go now, they are not permanent anymore.



> like i don't care about crap nemore.


obviously you care about something or you would not be on dpselfhelp. :wink:


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## livinginhell333 (Feb 19, 2005)

i don't do drugs right now, i've smoked weed only a few times and the last time it freakin ruined me and sent me into a world of torture and hell.


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## LOSTONE (Jul 9, 2005)

I had to do many drugs to enter that hell but I know that pot can do some serious dammage to people.

I don't know if I would go so far as to say that you are tripping but that's what it sounds like to me. When I was tripping really hard, everything seemed fake and gone. Even when I used to look at my hands I could not feel them at all. I could see them but if I closed my eyes then I would have no proof that they even existed. I don't even like to think about those days anymore because they were so insane.

I suggest you stay the hell away from drugs and even when it comes to perscription drugs be very carful becuase I have serious flashbacks with most meds. I am scared to death to take any meds now. The only thing that you can do is just try not to focus on the fact that you can't feel anything and that nothing seems real. No matter how crazy and messed up you feal all you can do is just try to ignor it as best you can. I will always have problems with HPPD and flashbacks but because I have had this for so long I have learned through experience that there is no point in freaking out about it anymore. This is what I am so all I can do is accept this and live the best I can. It does help to have some kind of direction in life becuase then you will at least have a reason to fight and to live.


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## 1A (Aug 12, 2004)

livinginhell333 said:


> i don't do drugs right now, i've smoked weed only a few times and the last time it freakin ruined me and sent me into a world of torture and hell.


I remember you talking about that.

Wasn't it the weed that gave you a REALLY bad panic attack?

Sometimes one (only one) really bad panic attack can create a sort of trauma in the mind/body.

The good news is that you can always tap into that and get your old self back.

Trauma can be locked in the body and manifest itself as DP/DR, anxiety, etc. on a constant, daily basis.

For me, all it took was one panic attack, and I felt messed up forever.

I kept obsessing and thinking "Man, if only I hadn't taken those pills, I wouldn't have messed up my life."

That's really an unfair way to look at the situation. Because all along I could have felt better, but my approach was all wrong.

You can and will get better too. You haven't lost your old self.

Read "Healing Trauma" by Peter Levine and I think you'll find ways to recover.

Jeff


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## livinginhell333 (Feb 19, 2005)

yea the whole hands thing, i can see them but if i close my eyes as well i feel as if i don't have hands, or any body part for that matter. its scary. i'm like floating all the time. this is why its so hard for me to do things, because to do things you need to move, use your legs feet hands to do things, and it never feels like i am actually doing these things. i try not to think about it, but its hard when you know this isn't normal and your not supposed to feel this way at all and i wish there was a way that i can actually feel like i'm doing something or feel my body parts, or something idk.


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## LOSTONE (Jul 9, 2005)

> "Man, if only I hadn't taken those pills, I wouldn't have messed up my life."


I said that to myself for years!!!!!

I kept telling myself that my life was over and that I was so stupid for useing drugs. For a long time the only thing I could even think about was the fact that my life was over and I was already dead anyway so what is keeping me from cutting my throat!



> That's really an unfair way to look at the situation. Because all along I could have felt better, but my approach was all wrong.


That's what I finally realized myself thanks to you and many other people on here. I looked in the wrong direction for years condeming myself to misory but thankfully I found Dpselfhelp and a cure.

I am sure that over time livinginhell333 will find a cure also.


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## Guest (Apr 5, 2006)

I doubt pot did any physiological or neurological damage to you. It's not neurotoxic; but it can sure be psychologically damaging for long periods of time, especially if you experienced a full blown panic attack while high. My situation was perfect for an anxiety disorder like DP/DR to manifest itself:
-Me being 16 years old at the time

- Getting high alone for the first time, and not having experienced users there to reassure me that I was ok.

- Pot being the first "real" psychoactive I used

- Me being unaware of what exactly to expect, and how it would feel to be under the influence.


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## strangermyself (Apr 1, 2006)

I also have had totally falsed sensations, now it certainly got better..Don't just try to avoid to think of it, but more than all take care of you can take care, invest your will in sth, everything it be.
If you also suffer from problems with memory and emotions like me, i'd just suggest you to spend time with people, though avoiding to think of what sets you apart from them.
After you've verified with tests there's nothing neurologically wrong, it will be easier for you to calm down people near you, too.

For Bigpappa- How long after the first high did it come dp?


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## chiara (Nov 5, 2005)

have you ever had any kind of test like and MRI or CT?


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## strangermyself (Apr 1, 2006)

chiara said:


> have you ever had any kind of test like and MRI or CT?


livinginhell or me?


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## chiara (Nov 5, 2005)

I was asking Livinginhell but I guess the same can apply to all that have the problem. I was wondering if his doctors ever told him to get one or not.


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## livinginhell333 (Feb 19, 2005)

no i get a cat scan and mri last year even an eeg, and some other tests all came back normal. i didn't get every test i don't think, so i was thinkin of explaining my senses problem to a neurologist to see if they can find anything that is causing this in the brain.


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## Larka (Dec 16, 2005)

I relate to you livinginhell and I sympathize because the same thing happens to me. Yours sounds like it's to a greater extent, but my senses are definitely messed up too. Last week in the morning when I was going to school, it was sooo amazing, I could smell again, and it was such an experience. I'm sure if you hang in there, some day things will improve. Maybe it'd be nice to just try to imagine what things feel or smell like and such. Like trying to remember the smell of baking cookies. I dunno...maybe if you imagine how it feels, maybe it'll come back.


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## chiara (Nov 5, 2005)

dont think about it. GO to a neurologist. It could be just in your head, yourself not allowing the feeling to come through. Since its effecting you physically as well, your hands and all, I would go. Take the ct scans and mri and whatever you did results with you.
It could be nothing, it could be a wierd side effect from your meds a it could be depression, a lot of things- neurologist can explain things to you.

If he or she is a good neurologist he will test you ( balance test, nerve tests things like that)

I know these things are costly but I would go if I were having such a hard time.

Do you get any kind of councelling?


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## Lunar Lander (Feb 17, 2006)

I won't tell you not to go to a doctor about it, but I can see why a dulling of the senses is a part of dp if it is caused by anxiety. In an anxious fight-or-flight situation, you do not want to focus on much other than, well...fight-or flight. Later when you're safe you can go back to feeling all that. I do get a dulling of the senses with dp/dr. I haven't really monitored my sense of taste and smell because I usually get it at the office where there isn't much to taste and smell (and going out to lunch tends to bring me down some if not completely), but I could imagine experiencing that along with the numbness and hazy vision I get with anxiety.

I do feel for you, man, but I think if you experimented with some really absorbing things that would get your mind pretty much off this you'd find yourself at least feeling better, and that'd give you confidence that you could get much better. It's kind of hard, I know, because while you're doing it you start thinking "is it gone yet...it's not gone yet...it's not gonna go away!" I know for me the worst dp I had (which I'll admit wasn't long, like a day and a half total) was when I didn't know what was going on. I went to this forum and read some recovery stories and found they all just got involved in things and so went forward and did that and it went away.


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## livinginhell333 (Feb 19, 2005)

i did all those tests last year it came back fine, but its like i have no body parts no senses, its so freakin hard to live when you don't feel here. i'll ask my psych if i should see a neurologist for the senses problem and see what she says because i really don't know anymore. all my senses suck, and all my feelings and emotions are gone pretty much, and i feel so detached from my body. what is a neurologist gonna do.


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## chiara (Nov 5, 2005)

well what does your physc say about this??


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## Pablo (Sep 1, 2005)

Livinghell333 if you think about it what you are experiencing could be your way of protecting yourself, what I mean is that your lack of sense experience and lack of connection could be a survival response.

If you experience an overwhelming situation or stress your body will first kick in its first survival resources which means that you will get flooded with adrenaline which can result in anger or fear, then if the threat or experience does not change it can result in panic, but then if panic does not change the situation your brain might begin to shut out the experience by shutting down its connection with the senses with the objective of reducing the psychological impact of the situation in order to reduce the trauma.

What you could be experiencing is a stuck survival resource. This is the approach I use anyway and although I dont have it as bad as you I felt completely detached and cut off for a long time, but by working with my body I started to unearth anger and shock pretty quickly, and now once I have delved deeper other emotional and sense responses are gradually returning such as my ears popping all of the time (like in a air plane) as my hearing is connecting again.


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## Pablo (Sep 1, 2005)

I smoked weed every day for about a year and I know people who have done so for about 5 years and I can categorically say that you have no brain damage from weed. What matters is not the drug you took but your brains reaction or overreaction to the experience of taking it so I doubt a neurologist will be able to do anything for you.


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## 1A (Aug 12, 2004)

Pablo said:


> I smoked weed every day for about a year and I know people who have done so for about 5 years and I can categorically say that you have no brain damage from weed. What matters is not the drug you took but your brains reaction or overreaction to the experience of taking it so I doubt a neurologist will be able to do anything for you.


I agree. A lot of these symptoms go away after a physiological release. I have spent thousands and thousands of dollars on doctor's appointments and tests, over the past decade, but nothing helped. I only started feeling better when I read the books by Peter Levine and immediately thought "Yeah, this makes sense, I'm going to try this." And then I started feeling better. But I am still working on feeling better and STAYING better. I am trying not to put pressure on myself to feel better by any given date, although that's tempting to do.

I also have to stop thinking that I should be feeling better after 3 or 4 months. I have to realize that I was not doing well at all for 11 years and therefore recovery and feeling better and STAYING better takes time to stick.

Jeff


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## Pablo (Sep 1, 2005)

1A said:


> I agree. A lot of these symptoms go away after a physiological release. I have spent thousands and thousands of dollars on doctor's appointments and tests, over the past decade, but nothing helped. I only started feeling better when I read the books by Peter Levine and immediately thought "Yeah, this makes sense, I'm going to try this." And then I started feeling better. But I am still working on feeling better and STAYING better. I am trying not to put pressure on myself to feel better by any given date, although that's tempting to do.
> 
> I also have to stop thinking that I should be feeling better after 3 or 4 months. I have to realize that I was not doing well at all for 11 years and therefore recovery and feeling better and STAYING better takes time to stick.
> 
> Jeff


I agree that Peter Levines work is the answer for so many people, I have read and own almost everything he has written and his understanding has helped a lot but unfortunatley it is mostly suited to those people who are able to connect with their anxiety and work it up into a panic and stay with it until it climaxes, but if you are disconnected from your anxiety it is very difficult for it to work it up to a climax to relsolve it, which is why it may not benefit everyone with dp as they may be too disconnected.

I know what you mean by not putting dates and time limits on feeling better. What I have tried to do is to stop thinking about what I will do when I am better and concentrate on how I feel now even though it isnt pleasant, as my mind was constantly thinking about how things will be better in the future or how good things were in the past, but by doing so I was ignoring how I was feeling at the present moment and I couldnt get better unless I was facing and accepting what life is like in the present moment.


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## Starz5 (Jul 5, 2006)

wrong post..sorry..i dont know how to delete off here..


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## Xu (May 6, 2006)

Mm.... I have this too... everything that livinghell has described in this thread.

At first, years ago, I stopped being able to feel things like tingling of any kind.. and progressively, more feelings stopped coming through. 

I eluded myself into thinking it would fix when I was finally with my boyfriend, where I could be freely happy and comfortable, but I get nothing, and I feel guilty about it.

I've never done any drugs, so I also think that's out.


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