# Existential Feelings Consume Me *possible trigger*



## Manof_theFuture (Dec 14, 2013)

Hey guys, I'm writing this to give you all a follow up on my recovery. I feel this can possibly help some of you out there as well as receiving some knowledge to help me through my suffering too. Lately i've been showing some great improvements but now it feels like I've fallen doen a notch due to some existential questions and reading up on psychedelics (fail on my part lol) basically it's the basic effects of powerful psychedelics that scare me for some odd reason e (ego death, unwanted insight, nihilism, etc.) take note that I have never done any drugs accept Marijuana, no powerful stuff, It completely angers me confuses me and scares me how fragile psychedelics make our existence seem. It's like I know in my heart I want this life to matter but my mind likes to believe otherwise. But it's not even the questions that bother me. It's the fact that I was feeling so much better like 95% Man!!!!! Lol and now I'm back to like a smooth 60 - 70% range. One that keeps me intact though is the fact that everytime I have a bad DP/DR episode (lasting for hours or days) the moment it ceases I start to feel better than before. One last thing, I notice that I feel worse when I'm alone, like if I'm not making any social contact whatsoever. Is this true for anyone else? Could this all just be accounted to anxiety and dissociation? Has anyone come to this point and still met a full recovery? Lastly, as always, can anyone relate to a brotha?


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