# I'v had DP for 10 years now...



## oo7grayfox (Sep 3, 2011)

Hi. I'm new, so I thought I'd tell my story. When I was in Elementary School, I was chubby, and got teased / bullied in school. I remember feeling like nothing was real, and feeling even a bit suicidal...however, I had no knowledge of depression, suicide, and especially depersonalization. When I was 12, I moved to a new town and finally made a friend. I lost the weight, and one day just remember waking up and feeling alive. For 3 years I was absolutely fine. Then, when I was in 10th grade my friend and I had a fight, I had a big crush on a girl who rejected me, and I got sick with the flu and was in bed for 2 weeks because of it. After all that, I started to feel like I was slipping back into the dream. After a couple of weeks I was fully back into it and never came out. That's when I saw my first therapist who diagnosed me with General Anxiety Disorder and introduced me to the term Depersonalization. It's been 10 years now and 4 therapists later. I have gone through High School and College. I now have a career in the industry that I've chosen. I have good friends and a great family who care about me. I live a pretty normal life. I have no idea why I can't break out. I've seen here that a lot of you had it caused by some sort of injury or drugs. That's just not the case for me. I tried Pot years after it started, and have never done any hard drugs. I had a concussion when I was 8-years-old, but that was also after I had started to feel this way as a child. So, has anyone else here had the condition for this long? Do you know of anyone that has and got over it? I am so frustrated at this point. My biggest fear is that I will waste my life away in a dream.


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## ProphetEdison (Apr 10, 2011)

oo7grayfox said:


> Hi. I'm new, so I thought I'd tell my story. When I was in Elementary School, I was chubby, and got teased / bullied in school. I remember feeling like nothing was real, and feeling even a bit suicidal...however, I had no knowledge of depression, suicide, and especially depersonalization. When I was 12, I moved to a new town and finally made a friend. I lost the weight, and one day just remember waking up and feeling alive. For 3 years I was absolutely fine. Then, when I was in 10th grade my friend and I had a fight, I had a big crush on a girl who rejected me, and I got sick with the flu and was in bed for 2 weeks because of it. After all that, I started to feel like I was slipping back into the dream. After a couple of weeks I was fully back into it and never came out. That's when I saw my first therapist who diagnosed me with General Anxiety Disorder and introduced me to the term Depersonalization. It's been 10 years now and 4 therapists later. I have gone through High School and College. I now have a career in the industry that I've chosen. I have good friends and a great family who care about me. I live a pretty normal life. I have no idea why I can't break out. I've seen here that a lot of you had it caused by some sort of injury or drugs. That's just not the case for me. I tried Pot years after it started, and have never done any hard drugs. I had a concussion when I was 8-years-old, but that was also after I had started to feel this way as a child. So, has anyone else here had the condition for this long? Do you know of anyone that has and got over it? I am so frustrated at this point. My biggest fear is that I will waste my life away in a dream.


I got mine EXACTLY the same way, by a flu..


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## ruffian_mcnabb (Jul 16, 2011)

...


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## oo7grayfox (Sep 3, 2011)

ProphetEdison said:


> I got mine EXACTLY the same way, by a flu..


Hey, although I've had this condition for 10 years for some reason only now I've done some personal research on the subject. I've found that some people say that it can be caused by some illnesses. Which is what made me remember that I had the Flu shortly before it happened. So it is possible that the Flu could cause this? Are you sure that's what the cause was for you? Did a doctor tell you so? It's just hard to find answers to this stuff on the internet. That's why I'm very happy that I found this forum.


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## DPhotog (Mar 18, 2011)

I got it when I was 6-7 years old. I am now 37. I remember it started when my parents were divorcing and I kept telling my mom that I felt like I was in a dream world. I don't deal with stress very well. There were times in my life when it would suddenly get worse- like looking into a spirling black hole, but it was brief. The DP has never, even gotten better. I don't think it ever will to be honest. I am more worried about my side effects (bad anxiety, constant loss of concentration and cannot focus for long, numbness, inability to really feel emotion, fight or flight). I've thought about therapy but I'm not sure it'll help. I was on Prozac for about 18 months in 2009 but stopped to get pregnant. Now I am nursing and getting off Zoloft since it's not helped much in 5 months but it was safe while breastfeeding so I tried.

So, there. 30 years and counting. Anxiety induced for me. No drugs.


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## doinallright (Jan 12, 2009)

hello friend, I have had it for about 25 years. At some point I stopped trying to change it and just accepted that my life may or may not be like this forever. The good news is that my life is awesome. When I stopped fighting it I found that there are lots of gifts that come with it. I wish you the best


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## Alejandroe84 (Jun 27, 2009)

Hey there,

Well, I must say that was an eye opening story and very personal. I too, have had mine for roughly ten years, since 2001. I was in my first year of high school. By then I had already experimenting with marijuana. Ive had been on a constant medication regiment, and been seeing my psychiatrist for a couple of years by then. I as well, am afraid that I will waste my life in a dream. I have already had to endure my life wasted through a dream with my marriage, first time in college, first time getting my license, and the first time being an uncle. Oh how I would love this feeling to end. My therapist said that usually people/patients with this condition will have more of a risk to suicide - but for me, the only thing that's keeping me going are my ever adoring wife and child. Without them in my life, I wouldn't know what to do!


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## oo7grayfox (Sep 3, 2011)

Thank you all so much for replying to this!! I hope the best for all of us. At least I can see that I'm not the only one experiencing this. It's soooo hard to explain this to other people, and they always look at me with that confused / cautiously worried look. I'm happy that if I never do get over this, at least I have people I can really talk to about it now. Except for my first therapist, from High School (the one who diagnosed me), none of the others had heard about the condition until I introduced it to them. So at least you guys understand. Thanks.


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