# Solipsism, please help!



## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Let me start by saying that I got over DP/DR in 2011, and it did not bother me again until two and a half weeks ago after having a baby boy (who is absolutely beautiful)

The hormones I am having right now are so not helping me out. I also have OCD and anxiety, so that is ALSO not helping. It's like a cocktail of insanity. I am seriously struggling with the idea that I am all alone. That everything is my imagination. That I am not even talking to real people on here, just talking to myself ( I honestly just chuckled, how freaking crazy do I sound right now??)

It's really bothering me. I will go a couple hours not thinking it, then when I am having a good moment, I'll remind myself "this is all made up by you, why are you enjoying this? none of this is real." and I will panic and get really upset. I was prescribed Zoloft, and when I think about it possibly helping, I think "I made up that medication, why would it help?" It's getting ridiculous. And I take very little comfort in advice I've read on the internet, because my OCD tells me "uh...you made up that person giving you advice, why listen to them? they don't exist."

This is a horrific ride I am on. It's almost worse than the DP/DR. Because at least when I had that, I had some kind of grip on reality and hope that I would get better. Now I don't even have that. I am a Christian, so this is seriously toying with me and I am so scared. I believe in God, I really do, and I have been begging Him for help through this.

Anyone going through this or get over this??? I am seriously just flat out scared. I can't stop thinking about it, or reminding myself. I want to know my family is real, my babies are real, and myself. This hurts so much. I wish I could just be a superficial person with no cares other than their IPhone dying or their pedicure going wrong or something...


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

But how do I get this feeling of despair to go away? I'm insane, I've deluded myself into thinking this is true. I feel sick. I feel hopeless. Like, I think "what is keeping me from running over people, or hurting my family, if none of them exist?" I guess I am waiting for myself to snap, and that scares me so much.

It's funny, but thinking about when I used to NOT think this way makes me feel no better. At all.


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## seafoamwaves (Sep 20, 2013)

What else are you afraid of, in real life?


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## lauras (May 13, 2012)

Qbug223 said:


> feeling of despair I feel sick. I feel hopeless.
> 
> It's funny, but thinking about when I used to NOT think this way makes me feel no better. At all.


You're trying to change how you feel with your thoughts, but that's not going to work because your thoughts are what got you into this mess to begin with! 

I had a solipsism obsession for 8 months. By month 2, I had suicidal ideation and was calmly considering how I would off myself.

I was pulled out of it after reading this site:

http://nothingworks.weebly.com

The answer it provides is extremely simple:

Live normally and you will think normally. Pretend. What would a healthy person's life look like? Act that way.

Will it be easy? No. But it works. Why? The thoughts you are having are initiated by the flight/fight response, and if you ignore them when it comes to the way in which you behave, then they will slowly fade away.

Explore your emotions, though. Loneliness, despair, and hopelessness do not come out of nowhere.

I've never had a baby before, so I don't know what that is like, but I imagine it's incredibly stressful. Do you have enough social support? Do you have someone you can talk to about all of your thoughts, even the ones you think are 'crazy'? Are you getting enough sleep?


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

I have an incredible support system. A wonderful family, a wonderful husband, and an adorable two year old boy in addition to the newborn baby boy. I am getting good rest, but I am exclusively breastfeeding so I am very exhausted, and am suffering an iron deficiency as well. So, it's hard right now. I'm also losing lots of weight because of almost complete loss of appetite. (my anxiety ruins my appetite)

I am seeking OCD treatment, I have considered it to be pure O. I talk to my husband about my issues a lot, and my mom helped me through the first time I went through DP/DR.

I like that idea of "live normally, think normally". I am normally an incredibly happy and warm person, and I am trying to remind myself that only a couple short weeks ago, this was my demeanor and never thought about the solipsistic point of view. It is soul crushing.

The fear is coming from the horrid thought that the people I love the most may not exist. That is a terrible idea. I love my family and life so, so much. That's why it's so depressing to me.


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## KevinSmith14 (Nov 16, 2013)

lauras said:


> You're trying to change how you feel with your thoughts, but that's not going to work because your thoughts are what got you into this mess to begin with!
> 
> The answer it provides is extremely simple:
> 
> ...


This is probably the best advice I have seen for Solipism so far! And I feel you are 100% right.

Unfortunately, Solipism cannot - almost be definition - be proven nor refuted logically, it is alike to debating the existance of god. But as Laura says, it is your brain and it's wandering thoughts that got you to this state, using the same strategy to bring yourself back.


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## KevinSmith14 (Nov 16, 2013)

Qbug223 said:


> It's really bothering me. I will go a couple hours not thinking it, then when I am having a good moment, I'll remind myself "this is all made up by you, why are you enjoying this? none of this is real." and I will panic and get really upset. I was prescribed Zoloft, and when I think about it possibly helping, I think "I made up that medication, why would it help?" It's getting ridiculous. And I take very little comfort in advice I've read on the internet, because my OCD tells me "uh...you made up that person giving you advice, why listen to them? they don't exist."


It is such a brutal cycle, but I think that's why it is so popular amongst the anxious and those who have OCD. Typically OCD will trap us into a corner until we find a way to crawl out.. and by my experience it learns why you crawled out the last time and attempts to fix its own mistake the next time it haunts your brain.

The best strategy I find in any OCD like situation is to think about something else. Do anything other than sit there and ruminate about the thought, as this is the way OCD gains its control over you. The more you ruminate, the more likely you are to be convinced.


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Thanks everyone! I had a pretty good night last night, it was very much worry-free and I felt normal. We will see how the day goes.


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

I really wish this ridiculous word wud get deleted from the dictionary!! It is absolute bullshit...plz plz get this word out of ur mind u do not have this...u just have anxiety.

How did having a baby make u depersonalize ? I've never heard of this before...


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Postpartum depression messes with your mind in ways you have never even fathomed. Unless you have had a baby, it's something you can't explain. The hormone crash your body experiences is incredible. It effects everything about you. Look up PPD/PPA/PPD with OCD/and PPP. It's amazing what having a baby can do to your mind. And really sad, too.


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## Hosscat (Oct 23, 2012)

Definitely look into exposure response prevention for ocd. You go about it by saying maybe everything is an illusion, maybe its not. And really accept you cant know. The anxiety is making you obsess over uncertainty, once you are not afraid of uncertainty these thoughts start to fade. And when you aren't thinking about them life naturally starts feeling normal again.Ive suffered from this for over a year so far and its just now starting to get better, so don't give up hope. It may take awhile, and it may seem hopeless at times, but keep exposing yourself to your fears without the fear response. Retrain your brain that there is nothing to fear.


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Hosscat, I have read your threads and was hoping you would reply.

Did you ever think "oh, nothing can help me, medication can't help me since it's not real, and no one can help me since they aren't real."?

Those thoughts are the most hopeless to me, and scare me because I am scared I have completely convinced myself, which means I must be absolutely insane, to believe such crock.

I had such a great day today, and then it just came crashing down. It was the worst. I had a total breakdown to my husband where he just held me for about 15 minutes. And the worst part was the whole time I was crying, my horrible brain was thinking "why are you crying? none of this is real."

I have turned into my own worst enemy. It won't go away. I can't even have a total breakdown without thinking it isn't real. I feel so done. I don't want to kill myself. But I don't know how much longer I can go on thinking like this. Every time I think about it, it's like a panic button goes off. And then I just feel devastated and depressed.

Like I said before, I was given Zoloft, but I'm scared to take it, AND I think it's a figment of my imagination, so why would it help, if it doesn't even exist...


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

Qbug223 said:


> Postpartum depression messes with your mind in ways you have never even fathomed. Unless you have had a baby, it's something you can't explain. The hormone crash your body experiences is incredible. It effects everything about you. Look up PPD/PPA/PPD with OCD/and PPP. It's amazing what having a baby can do to your mind. And really sad, too.


Wow that sux  .... I couldn't imagine myself then if I had a baby...I know the couple of times I've been pregnant I got extremely tired and moody and had no patience


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## Hosscat (Oct 23, 2012)

Yeah ive thought all that stuff constantly for about a year. But by truly accepting maybe this is an illusion im starting to SLOWLY feel like its probably not. That its just anxiety. And anxiety doesn't go away quickly. I still have trouble with it but finally after trying everything else and hearing from many people to accept it, even though it seems counterintuitive I thought I might as well try. Now I can go hours without the thought, I can laugh, I can sleep in late lol and when I wake up solipsism is not the first thing on my mind. I flat out did believe it for awhile. I didn't want to, but the more I tried to disprove it the worse it got. Now I feel like im on the tailing end of a bad experience. Im not fully recovered yet, but im so much better than I was. I also attribute this to my medication. I went to a psychiatrist it got so bad and was given abilify. I don't care if it is an antipsychotic. It helps me, and it doesn't mean im crazy. Just that my brain needed a bit of help with this fight, just like how some people have heart or stomach trouble. You can get better, but you have to be very brave and strong. When you're at your worst just let it all be, don't fight it, let the noise and bad feelings stick around, you cant control what you think, so why try? Only when you stop caring can you start healing.

And remember, you don't need to prove or disprove this to your mind. You just need to accept it might be true, not be afraid, and start to not think about it slowly. Youll have times with the doubt without the anxiety, and that almost feels worse, youll feel like you believe it. But keep up with the maybe I do maybe I don't thing. Your true feelings, not your anxious brains will start to come back


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

See, this is where I struggle. I am a firm believer in God, so my mind will not let me accept it as a possibility. The closest I can get to that is "only God knows." I can't tell myself this might be true. My beliefs won't let me. So, maybe that is what is making this such an extreme uphill battle for me. It's not only my family that I might be losing, it's my God. And He means everything to me. I can't just abandon Him as illusion.


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## CherryCoke (Oct 24, 2013)

Same here, just can't get rid of it, despite Solomon helped so much so far!!!! Overmore I have strange thoughts like: why can people tink, why do they have to eat? Crap. How are you today?


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Ugh, I woke up and just immediately was like "is it still there?" and yup. There it was. If I could just wake up and never think of it again, other than in slight passing, the world would be so much better...


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## Spadde (Oct 29, 2013)

I too suffer from solipsism, I have even asked my mother if she's real, I still dont know, but I think its more reasonable to think that she is real, and the rest of the world with her.

If you think about it, how would a proof of how other humanbeings are real even look like?

There is just noway for one person to KNOW that there is indeed another soul inside that flesh body, its simply something every person has to accept.

I once read a post from "solomonOrlando" that really helped me believe that the world is real and not just my imagination.

http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/43595-refuting-solipsism-and-other-metaphysical-claims-extreme-trigger-warning/?hl=solipsism

"Taking your point, let's rationalize it a bit. Let's say that I am a Solipsist, I believe that I created everything in this world and that I simply "AM"; which doubles as the only undeniable proof in my existence. First note that I must beginto exist and, because I have my sensory perception in motion, this motion has not always been happening. Thus, I have to have a cause - if Solipsism were true, I must have made myself begin to exist. This leaves a couple of possibilites:


I caused myself to start existing before I even started to exist myself, which would be contradicting in itself.
I caused myself to begin to exist at a later state of my existence (as provided by A-time/B-time theorists), which would provide that the effect precedes the cause, an impossibility by definition. 
I caused myself to begin to exist simultaneous to the moment of my beginning - which, again, I must have _caused _that beginning.

The "language" that Jurgen is talking about here is, sure, the fact that you'd need a blueprint to provide any sort of building process for human life, society and the world around, but also the language that would have you define/create yourself, but let me step back a bit and talk about A-Time Theory, which would be completely true under Solipsism.

A-Time Theorists state that events and things are not equally true - only the present time the Solipsist is in is metaphysically true; the past is no longer the truth and the future will become the truth, but it is proven from every vantage in the universe that they are not currently the case - only the present is truth, which means that it must absolutely have a cause. Take number three, for example, my sensory perception and the moment of my "beginning" must have had a cause.. This cause is either due to other perceptions or due to my creative ability intrinsic in my own being. At the moment of which I began, my perceptions could not have been caused by past perceptions, or else it was not the first moment when I began. Therefore, my creative office must have caused them to begin to exist, simultaneously with the creation of my beginning.

To conclude this, my creative faculty inside of myself, itself, must begin to exist with the content with which to create, since it would be completely gone otherwise and, thus, would lack any means of creative ability, since there would be nothing by which it has means to create. Fact of the matter is, to be able to exist, I must have preconceived notions on which to create my being and I believe that this is the language that Jurgen is talking about here."


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

The fact that I did not understand half of that disproves Solipsism, because I would have completely understood that...


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## CherryCoke (Oct 24, 2013)

How are you guys today? Do you babe as Wellen thoughts like: why Do people think,choose etc?


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## Ambre_solaire (Nov 9, 2013)

Hey Qbug how are you doing?

I suffered with thoughts like these for a while and i understand exactly how lonely and depressing it feels. I promise you it is pure obsessional thinking causing this. Its fear. If you weren't scared you wouldn't dwell on it, it is the fear of this way of thinking that keeps it in the forefront of your mind. Try to realise this and truly think about this for a minute. First I got on citalopram (SSRI). I also had fears like you did that "well if i invented my whole life in my imagination then this medicine is also made up". But it takes away a significant part of the anxiety. This means that you can think about it more logically, without emotional reasoning getting in the way as much. I suggest you try taking your Zoloft. It takes 2-4 weeks to properly work so the longer you leave it the longer it will take for you to possibly get some relief.

Once i was on citalopram and stabilised i used a few other methods to sort this problem out.

First distract yourself, you cant intently concentrate on two things at once, that is not how our brains are made up. So do something which you know interests you, or will keep your mind occupied. I found getting on with the heavy theory that my uni course requires actually really helped with me because it required a lot of sustained concentration.

Secondly, do NOT try to argue with it. You will not find answers to an *unanswerable, stupid* question by dwelling on it. It is simply irrefutable. Now think about why it is irrefutable. There are several options. Ok so the first one, which you fear is that everything is made up in your mind. This would be an incredibly lonely, narcissistic experience. It may well be the case. However the second option is to look at it from your actual situation. You have had a tough time recently, you've been incredibly stressed and you know you have OCD. OCD works on doubt and fear, and Solipsism seems like the worst thing imaginable, oh and hey you can't disprove it. Its perfect fodder for a stressed mind to latch onto, as many people in the forum have said. Aside from all the other arguments that have been presented by other people here, which i believe are there as an attempt at reassurance (which is how you keep OCD alive by the way), you simply will never know. None of us will.

Now think about this:

Either its true. *Or its not.* We all have our own minds, imaginations, souls, beliefs etc in exactly the same way. A lot of the beauty in life is because of this. Trust and love are beautiful because of uncertainty. All human interaction is beautiful because we cannot read each others minds. Connections form because we trust others and we discover through interacting with people part of their soul and their mind and their way of thinking. If we could anticipate the actions of others life would be entirely dull.

Solipsism as a theory only exists because some lonely f*cker *correctly observed* that we all have our subjective view point. We cant see into each others minds. Well done him.

If any of this didnt make sense try to remember that it is human nature to be curious about the nature of our own existence and someone would have come up with the theory sooner or later. Try to remember that before he pointed this out, people got along just fine trusting that other minds existed as well. Animals i guess are lucky because they don't (as far as we know) ponder this deeply about stuff. They just are. And they follow their instincts. And if we follow our instincts and start to live a little more and think a little less deeply about the whys and hows of life (when were stressed), we can all get on with enjoying the beauty around us.

I promise you you are not going crazy, you are scared of going crazy, because in your life experience you can imagine the implications of this (losing your family/faith/whatever). Your life experience has led you to this point of doubt, and you can take control of your life and get yourself out of it. Best of luck to everyone suffering with these thoughts. Its a 50/50 situation and i know which one i prefer and choose to live by. xxxx


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Hey everyone! I have had two really, really good days. I have barely thought about it. I have felt more like myself than I have in a long time. I just started telling myself "what if...oh fuck it. Who cares?" and "It's just anxiety." Or when the thought comes, I finish it with a totally insane, stupid thought. It has helped immensely. The answer is simple, stop thinking about it. I know that sounds so hard, but that's it. Brush it off as just a thought!

I am still doing therapy though, I need it. I still have GAD and depression. So I still need help. But at least this OCD train of that has slowed down a lot.


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

Qbug223 said:


> But how do I get this feeling of despair to go away? I'm insane, I've deluded myself into thinking this is true. I feel sick. I feel hopeless. Like, I think "what is keeping me from running over people, or hurting my family, if none of them exist?" I guess I am waiting for myself to snap, and that scares me so much.
> 
> It's funny, but thinking about when I used to NOT think this way makes me feel no better. At all.


Even if on some parallell universe the world is just a projection of your mind. You have imagined consequences for your actions if you did just 'run over people because they are figments of your imagination'.

A) extreme guilt and remorse
B) loneliness
C) prison time
D) being a murderer etc.
E) you have a set of moral codes

So what's to stop you if everything is just imaginary - that alone is enough. Whether imaginary or not, you still feel them and are engaged in them, and thats what stops most people. Pretty good loop-hole we've imagined for ourselves


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## gasspanicc (Mar 21, 2012)

fuck man ive thought about fruitloops, blue moons, living in jupiter while being attacked by dennis rodman. cant rememeber if this life is real or a dream, or if i even exist atall.. where am i from, what do i do, where do i come from, who likes me, why am i alone, why does anyone do nething. why am i the coolest person alive, who dares enter my kingdom. listen this solpism shit, is nothing, im not trying to sound harsh, mean, condescending or anything. my point is ITS NOTHING, ur minddoenst need to think about this stuff . ive had every messed up thought in the sun, literally i have, i have messed up one, after another another another another another, and it gets u no where! basically just stop thinking about it, thoughts are empty, no substance, have no power over u unless u let them.


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## Jurgen (Aug 3, 2013)

I think we should ban the word "Solipsism" to prevent any further confusion concerning the illusory state of existence.

I think Solipsism is false because it's incoherent and doesn't add up. I actually don't like fish. I'm 18 and from the moment I was born I cannot recall a moment I have ate fish and sincerely enjoyed eating it. Why would I create fish, then? I don't know. Maybe my imagination is schizophrenic.

Anyway, the topic that was linked here is an excellent source to alleviate your Solipsistic fears. Also, you'll notice that ancient civilizations used to believe in omnipotent Gods and that Earth was at the center of the Universe until both these notions were proven wrong. Likewise with Solipsism.

It's a reasonable philosophical notion. But something to get worked up over? Not really. It's a boring philosophy. Either way, what difference would it make if it were true or false?

Last but not least

I am the only Solipsist here.


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## Qbug223 (Dec 1, 2013)

Doing way, way better. I have pretty much broken the cycle by busying myself and just telling myself it's total crap. Thanks everyone!


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