# does anyone else feel like this?



## Christina (Aug 26, 2010)

Hello,

I was just wondering if anyone else felt this way during DP/DR. I have had this constantly for about a year now, and have developed somewhat of a psychotic depression (PMD) from it.

My mind feels like I am constantly high. I dont feel detatched from myself or like I am watching a movie, but rather I feel stuck inside my own head.

My mind constantly has trouble placing my body in space. I have to map out everywhere I am going, and my brain moves in waves trying to understand direction and space.

I am constantly overwhelmed with a feeling of dread and like I can't accomplish the simplest of tasks. I feel like I cant read or write even though it comes out fine.

It feels like there is something wrong with my brain. I fear that I must have a tumor or brain cancer or something more serious than DR.

Does anyone else feel this way or similiar? Any replies would be greatly appreciated. Particularly anyone who has trouble with the concept of space.

Thanks!


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## Guest (Sep 30, 2010)

unfortunately i do relate. dp really fucks up lives


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## kate7 (Jul 25, 2010)

yes i am same


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## FoXS (Nov 4, 2009)

Christina said:


> My mind constantly has trouble placing my body in space. I have to map out everywhere I am going, and my brain moves in waves trying to understand direction and space.


yes, i have this too. do you also have the impression that when you walk, you cant estimate the space between your legs and the ground? do you have tunnel vision? for example, this morning i was in a store. i walked through the, you know, rows with shelves, and suddenly i have the impresssion as if i am standing in front of a wall ! like my eyes think that what i see is not deep, but only 2d vision. totally strange, i immediately stop because i think that otherwise i would crash into that wall ! and when i try to focus, the rows with the shelves suddenly become deeper and deeper, so that the actual wall seems to be 200 metres in front of me, but it was only 3 metres, so it seems longer and not able to reach. i always have those kind of disturbances, nearly every minute, i hate this !!


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## piescoffer (Dec 10, 2009)

Christina said:


> Hello,
> 
> I was just wondering if anyone else felt this way during DP/DR. I have had this constantly for about a year now, and have developed somewhat of a psychotic depression (PMD) from it.
> 
> ...


Sadly I can relate to all of this - I had to fill out a form today with just my own details on - and as I was writing I was thinking how the hell am I doing this, who am I, how can I write - looking at my output like it was not me that was writing it - but then followed by a rush of anxiety thinking why the hell am I questioning this I am in my 30's and have filled out hundreds of forms in my life and never had this, and what if this gets worse and I can't write anymore and I totally forget who I am or where I came from ...etc....etc you all know the drill.

One of the worst things for me right now is looking around at other people like they are strange and I have never seen people before - it's like the whole concept of human life has become alien to me and the more my mind works to try and put back the missing pieces of the jigsaw puzzle in my head the worse it gets. The only way I can deal with it is just keep telling myself its just the DP and things will appear normal again soon when it passes.

The thing with space is all too familier as well - it's like my brain can't handle the concept of it, like I am on the outside of me looking in, seeing this body moving around and trying to make sense of where I am, which causes panic attacks and sweats.

Hope these horrible feelings go away soon


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## KowgurrlKK (Aug 11, 2010)

Christina said:


> Hello,
> 
> I am constantly overwhelmed with a feeling of dread and like I can't accomplish the simplest of tasks. I feel like I cant read or write even though it comes out fine.
> 
> It feels like there is something wrong with my brain. I fear that I must have a tumor or brain cancer or something more serious than DR.


This is so ironic, I just placed a post in the "how I'm feeling today" section that's very similar to what your feeling! YES, I find it hard to read and write even though I'm doing those things just fine... I am often afraid that at some point my brain will forgot how to tell my legs how to walk, or that I will forget how to spell, etc etc etc... and I also OFTEN times think that I must have a brain tumor b/c it's just GOT to be something other than DP/DR. However, my brain has been scanned two different times (for other reasons--once getting hit in the head with a softball, and once for migraines) however, both times the MRI's were just fine. It's just Satan putting in our heads that something is terribly wrong with us, he wants to steal any kind of joy or normalcy we may think we have...and he does it because he knows we are weak in that particular area so he attacks. ANd even if you do not believe in God and Satan or Heaven and Hell, it's still just your mind playing games with you... that's how anxiety (in my opinion) works, you get down and your mind just keeps pushing you farther and farther... but as I have read on this forum before, you most likely will NOT forget how to accomplish those simple tasks, you are NOT going crazy, it WILL get better, and you do NOT have a brain tumor! Keep your chin up!!!


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## Rachel91 (Oct 16, 2010)

When I am reading, I feel like I focus in and out. Like the words get smaller or bigger then normal and certian things seem closer or further away then they actually are. I didn't know if I was the only one who felt this or am I just crazy


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## *deleted* (Nov 19, 2010)

Christina said:


> Hello,
> 
> I was just wondering if anyone else felt this way during DP/DR. I have had this constantly for about a year now, and have developed somewhat of a psychotic depression (PMD) from it.
> 
> ...


I can relate to the feeling you can't do the easiest tasks. Particularly the reading. And walking to ( I know it sound strange ). I'm sitting or standing and about to go but I just don't cause I have a feeling I just can't.


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