# What exactly is recovery?



## lisac2020 (Aug 1, 2011)

It was only recently that i realised i developed anxiety/panic disorder, the main symptom being DP, during which i start panicing. It was because of a bad trip i had on something called LSA, (similar to LSD). The bad trip was approximatly 5 weeks ago. I spent that time thinking tonnes of different things, all the mental disorders i could have, that i was going crazy blabla. Then i found this site and realised DP with panic is exactly what it is. Well anyways, ive also been doing a lot of research about recovery and there are times i feel normal, like when i do the steps of acceptance, distraction and basically just forgetting i have it helps. But it is alwyas there, it feels like a constant battle. 
But what i would like to know is, if i keep going on like this, will it eventually go away? Because as of now i can 'think my way' back into it so easily! Like if im at home watching tv, its really easy to keep away because its easier to stay focused on what my mind is doing, but when i go out, its a lot harder to stay in reality. (BTW, does that mean i have an underlying Social anxiety disorder?) So is recovery basically learning to live with it/learning to ignore the feelings? Or does ignoring it and accepting it ect acually change the brain chemistry and make it go away permanantly? And because it was drug induced what does that mean? Some people say that if its drug induced it will go away easier, and others say that it is actually more permanent since there is no source for the anxiety/fear/panic. I never felt anything like this before the bad trip.
Oh yeah, one more thing, even if i go a whole day feeling normal, its at night that the panic keeps coming. I wake up multiple times during the night, like near falling asleep and near waking up where literally, panic would wake me up, and since im half asleep its harder to convince myself the feeling is irrational, so it lingers there and is quite strong so its hard to go back to sleep. 
Sorry for all the questions, its just that im new to this and really scared.


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

Okay uh.. so let's start

I Got it also from a bad trip,from weed.My bad trip in fact was a huge panic attack that lasted more than 30 mintues,i really thought I was going to die or even becoming crazy,schizophrenic,many things.

So the fact that you doesn't feel unreality where you're watching TV or something like that is pretty good.It means that you can get distracted.And it really helps,cause thinking about DP/DR just gives you more anxiety which gives you more DP/DR.

Also you don't have an social anxiety disorder.I used to get more DP/DR when I got out also,cause seems like you check more the things you know,like if you are checking if they are really real or not,pretty normal.

With the time it goes away.Acceptance,Distraction and not dwelling the symptons are the easiest way to recovery.

I Don't know if you're doing meds anything like that,my case if pretty much the same to yours,I have got panic disorder,which the main sympton was DP/DR.

But I'm taking Lexapro 10mg and Clonazepam 0,5mg.In the beggining I felt worse with the panic and DR/DP with Lexapro,but Clonazepam really helped me with anxiety and generally it cutted my DR/DP off.

But now I feel great with Lexapro also,well my last panic attack was 2 or 3 weeks ago,and wasn't very strong,less then 3 minutes I Think.

Hang on,you're on the right way.


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## cris24333 (Oct 30, 2010)

it fades away really slowly


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## lisac2020 (Aug 1, 2011)

Victor Ouriques said:


> Okay uh.. so let's start
> 
> I Got it also from a bad trip,from weed.My bad trip in fact was a huge panic attack that lasted more than 30 mintues,i really thought I was going to die or even becoming crazy,schizophrenic,many things.
> 
> ...


Thanks so much for your reply. For me, the panic attack on the bad trip lasted for about 10 hours or so!
But im glad to hear time will make it go away. My worst weakness is obsessing over it!
I wanted to ask you about the medications you are taking though. How long did you start taking them after your bad trip? And how often? Im asking because i dont want to have to depend on meds then when i go off them everything returns







Ive heard good things about Clonazepam though, how often do you take it and what are the side-effects? But i cant ask for a particular medicine from a doctor can i? its just whatever they prescribe. I do have something called Cipralex, which is an SSRI prescribed to me for my past anxiety...but when i tried it i had terrible side effects (including severe insomnia and joint pains) and the doctor told me to stop...plus i heard SSRIs can make anxiety and DP a lot worse! I think in the case of having a bad trip our serotonin levels are too high, so making them higher would make it worse! Is lexapro an SSRI?
Once again, sorry for all the questions!


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

lisac2020 said:


> Thanks so much for your reply. For me, the panic attack on the bad trip lasted for about 10 hours or so!
> But im glad to hear time will make it go away. My worst weakness is obsessing over it!
> I wanted to ask you about the medications you are taking though. How long did you start taking them after your bad trip? And how often? Im asking because i dont want to have to depend on meds then when i go off them everything returns
> 
> ...


Well you don't need to feel sorry I'm here to help,I know how painful this is.

I Started taking these meds almost 1 month later than my bad trip.I Really couldn't cope with it anymore.Still taking both of them,1 time a day each.Lexapro after lunch and Clonazepam before sleeping.

Well Lexapro is an SSRI.As you said I really felt worse at the beggining,that's why they recommend you Clonazepam also.

I Really felt my DR a bit worse and my physical symptoms worse,like heart palpitations,shaking and all those stuff.But after 2 weeks I began to feel good,my panick attacks really faded away,with my physical symptons like shaking or heart palpitations all the day I used to have.

Also i had a big insomnia too.But with the use of Clonazepam I really got better.But there's people who also gets very sleepy with it.

Also well I don't know exactly if our serotonin is too high,in fact I think it is slower than the normal,what I think is that dopamine is too high.But I don't know exactly,I just know that these meds helped me.We're "lucky" I say becase drug induced anxiety or DP/DR are goes away easier,because our brain chemistry was deregulated by them.

Clonazepam is an awesome medication,cause it really gets your anxiety down.When I started taking it I remember that when I tooked it I felt my DR/DP fading away.Which proved me that DR/DP is due to high anxiety.

I'm still taking them and don't be feared to become dependant.You won't.If you take them correctly,and withdraw them correctly,you will feel very good!

Unfortunately Cipralex is Lexapro also.They both are Escitalopram,they're the best SSRI avaiable.And it's pretty normal that they makes things worse at the beggining.I Really wanted to stop,but I kept and with the use of Clonazepam I didn't felt too much side-effects.

Also you can try other meds,Venlafaxine,Duloxetine,there are many of them.Because if you just take Clonazepam you will definetely be better,but then you'll get depend if you take it alone.Normally people just take it till the antidepressant start working.

Another hint it's taking supplements.They really helped me also.Multivitamins,VITA B12,Magnesium,L-Tryptophan,ST John's wort,L-Theanine.Many people related getting better taking L-Theanine,St John's wort and L-Tryptophan,they're related to serotonin also.

Feel free to ask.

Therapy is very good too.


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## Chris P Bacon (May 31, 2011)

Time is the big healer.

I know thats probably not what alot of people want to hear but i think you should realise that this is a temporary condition and your brain is now taking the time it needs to recover, it maybe a few months before your brain starts to say "right, I've had my rest" and you snap back to reality.

For me, I had DP/DR pretty much constantly for four to five months, it came on in February but by June I had noticed slight improvements. Then in the past couple of weeks I have notice an even bigger improvement and I feel almost back to normal, I'm still not there yet but I feel much much better than I did a month or so ago. My brain fog which was really bad has almost gone and I don't really notice the DP/DR for large parts of the day. Maybe in another month I will be back to normal.

The first thing you have to do is just accept the DP/DR and get used to it. I spent months wondering why I was feeling this way and I got frustrated and anxious, then you get used to it and I think thats half the battle won. From then on you just have to keep on improveing gradually.

The human brain truly is incredible.


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## lisac2020 (Aug 1, 2011)

Victor Ouriques said:


> Well you don't need to feel sorry I'm here to help,I know how painful this is.
> 
> I Started taking these meds almost 1 month later than my bad trip.I Really couldn't cope with it anymore.Still taking both of them,1 time a day each.Lexapro after lunch and Clonazepam before sleeping.
> 
> ...


I have some good news, i think my DP is getting better! The panic feelings are much less intense but the negative feelings/thoughts are still there. Thanks for all the advice on meds but for now im going to try and heal without them. I think if i do start taking medicines ill always be wondering if i would feel the same way without medicine. Last night i didnt wake up with any panics and went for quite a while without thinking about it because i went out to the grocery store and spent a lot of time looking and thinking about food lol, only this time it wasnt as bad as before. I hope these are steps in the right direction as im still paranoid of getting it all back...

how long ago was your bad trip? I think what we have is post tramatic stress disorder from the bad trip, so definatly time and a healthy lifestyle and of course lots of distraction is the best thing I think i will try to deal with this alone, but if it gets bad ill try therapy as well...are you in therapy? do they give you cognitive behavoural therapy, or how does it work for dp?
Thanks again, it helps me so much to talk about it actually


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## lisac2020 (Aug 1, 2011)

Chris P Bacon said:


> Time is the big healer.
> 
> I know thats probably not what alot of people want to hear but i think you should realise that this is a temporary condition and your brain is now taking the time it needs to recover, it maybe a few months before your brain starts to say "right, I've had my rest" and you snap back to reality.
> 
> ...


Im actually happy to hear that time is a healer, because i was afraid i would have to live like this forever or something! Thats a really good way to look at it, that the brain is resting.

So what triggered your DP/DR? Its good to hear your progress, congrats! For me, since it was a bad trip that triggered it, i think DP is a symptom of PTSD. Although the bad trip happened only about 5 weeks ago, and the DP actually started in full force, non-relenting only a week ago, im noticing improvements very fast. In one way i am happy but in another im thinking its too good to be true since usually people take a lot more time and do a lot more to distract themselves. Since im moving soon and my friends are usually busy with school and work i dont have much to distract myself with really







Did you do certain things like poeple on here suggest or did you just play the waiting game?

And i agree that acceptance is definatly a big step towards improvement. For me i was actully so happy to realise what this actually was and that it was temporary that i accepted it right away just being so relieved! Before i was thinking the bad trip unlocked some kind of deep trama and i would have to keep thinking and thinking about the negative thoughts; that they would reveal something to me...but that kept making me worse! What i really needed to learn were that those thoughts are not true or correct at all! And as time goes by, i beleive them less and less. The negative thoughts are really bad though, it seems my brain is trying to find any way it can to convince me im crazy and ill be like this forever. The worst thought is when i think about all my faults that i had even before the trip, and if i already was a crazy person anyway. I guess i just have to keep ignoring that one...

This may be the DP talking, but i feel bad about feeling so good, because i may still have a long road ahead of me...
But thanks for your reply







Hearing from poeple about recovery really helps me!


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## Chris P Bacon (May 31, 2011)

lisac2020 said:


> Im actually happy to hear that time is a healer, because i was afraid i would have to live like this forever or something! Thats a really good way to look at it, that the brain is resting.
> 
> So what triggered your DP/DR? Its good to hear your progress, congrats! For me, since it was a bad trip that triggered it, i think DP is a symptom of PTSD. Although the bad trip happened only about 5 weeks ago, and the DP actually started in full force, non-relenting only a week ago, im noticing improvements very fast. In one way i am happy but in another im thinking its too good to be true since usually people take a lot more time and do a lot more to distract themselves. Since im moving soon and my friends are usually busy with school and work i dont have much to distract myself with really
> 
> ...


I have been suffering with health anxiety since December of last year and the prolonged stress and worry took its toll on me in the end, the DP/DR came on strong after about two months of suffering with the anxiety. Thankfully I think I am starting to see improvements in not only the DP/DR, but in my anxiety too. Because being anxious about my health was the trigger, this was the key to getting better.

What helped me a lot was the fact that I never let the DP/DR stop ne doing what I loved. I've read plenty of people saying that they just lock themselves away in the house all day because its become their "safety zone". I think this is the worst thing you can do. I continued to socialise with friends, going to football matches etc... anything that helps to take your mind off it is great. Getting exercise is really important, it boosts sertonin levels in the brain which are low during anxiety/dp or dr.


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