# this is what i dont get



## yesyes (Oct 19, 2008)

so, people say that this fvcking dr/dp is caused by anxiety... it might be, it might be not... if it is, how come i cannot get relieve for a single day? i mean, this starts from the moment i wake up until i go to bed.... i wake up every day as if i hadnt slept for more than 2 hours (i sleep about 9) when i wake up it seems that i have had two beers or something and the feeling doesnt go away. No medication works for me - I am getting sooo sick of it!!


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

yesyes said:


> so, people say that this fvcking dr/dp is caused by anxiety... it might be, it might be not... if it is, how come i cannot get relieve for a single day? i mean, this starts from the moment i wake up until i go to bed.... i wake up every day as if i hadnt slept for more than 2 hours (i sleep about 9) when i wake up it seems that i have had two beers or something and the feeling doesnt go away. No medication works for me - I am getting sooo sick of it!!


Yeah that's what I've been wondering.. I can even feel extremely relaxed and still get DP'd at max :S


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## flipwilson (Aug 19, 2006)

i believe that based off of my experience that anxiety plays some a role in triggering this disorder but I would have to say that in no way is it fueling it. At least for me. My anxiety levels are no more severe than before i smoked my infamous joint. I have even made a point before how when i had to give a speech recently at my friends wedding my anxiety and fear of public speaking rifled my anxiety to awful levels. Sweating, shaking, dry mouth, all things i experienced *before* DP. It was no worse. BUT, after the speech there were no emotions of happiness or feelings of relaxation, just numb. For many Dp is not this passing phantom that you can ignore, it is a true malfunction of brain activity.


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## guest1234 (Mar 23, 2010)

I think it triggers it but what keeps it alive is your constant focus on it and fear of it. Definitely didn't start to feel better until I fully understood and thus lost my fear and was able to not put so much focus on how I was feeling and live as normally as possible. This is why I stand by thinking that it is important to keep a routine and work if possible. Obviously it varies from case to case but I was pretty damn bad for over 4 years and I managed it. It was pretty horrendous a lot of the time and very difficult but I think in the end it is very important to not let yourself avoid/hide away from the world. 
Gradually it just got easier I guess, I won't deny it was daily battle for a long time but somewhere along the line I turned a corner, and I firmly believe it is because I showed myself and my mind that there was nothing to fear. 
Back in the worst days I would spend every second of every day repeating mantras to myself about what DP was and what I needed to do and convincing myself I was ok, but it was only by actually showing myself that I was ok and nothing bad was gonna happen that I started to improve. 
These feelings can be utterly horrendous but unless you have some other underlying disorder (and even then sometimes the answer is the same) then it doesn't actually stop you doing normal stuff, it just makes it 100 times harder. But it is worth it in the end. No question.


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

guest1234 said:


> I think it triggers it but what keeps it alive is your constant focus on it and fear of it. Definitely didn't start to feel better until I fully understood and thus lost my fear and was able to not put so much focus on how I was feeling and live as normally as possible. This is why I stand by thinking that it is important to keep a routine and work if possible. Obviously it varies from case to case but I was pretty damn bad for over 4 years and I managed it. It was pretty horrendous a lot of the time and very difficult but I think in the end it is very important to not let yourself avoid/hide away from the world.
> Gradually it just got easier I guess, I won't deny it was daily battle for a long time but somewhere along the line I turned a corner, and I firmly believe it is because I showed myself and my mind that there was nothing to fear.
> Back in the worst days I would spend every second of every day repeating mantras to myself about what DP was and what I needed to do and convincing myself I was ok, but it was only by actually showing myself that I was ok and nothing bad was gonna happen that I started to improve.
> These feelings can be utterly horrendous but unless you have some other underlying disorder (and even then sometimes the answer is the same) then it doesn't actually stop you doing normal stuff, it just makes it 100 times harder. But it is worth it in the end. No question.


I think this is sort of a circle:

Anxiety triggers DP
DP feeds DP
DP induces fears on you, fears feed the DP
The fears that DP induces on you cause anxiety

Like, lately, I've been struggling more with the fears that DP induces more than DP itself. I developed a very intense fear of death, and I was actually very comfortable with it before. I spend most of my days getting involved in very deep thoughts about what happens after death, that life doesn't really make sense if we're dying after all we've done, and whenever I have these thoughts I get extremely anxious, which makes my DP/DR way worse along with lots of other anxiety symptoms.


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## BlueTank (Jun 2, 2010)

Yeah I was wondering the same thing. I've heard poeple say "sometimes" when it comes to like tunnel vision or feeling out of it. Sometimes? Try all the time.

When this all happened I was super fit, running every other day, happy, and shopping at whole foods. I was _really_ healthy. Then when this all happened and I found out what helps it, I tried my best to keep at it, but I never really got a day where it went away. I did'nt sleep better. I didn't get my concentration back. I did have some better days at times though.

But your right. You'd think you could just xanax your way out of it or sleep it off or something.


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## septimus (Jun 1, 2010)

Are you prepared for some analogies?

I had a new resolution for starting high school, and I kept at it. I ran cross country, made best friends, ate organic food and went to bed at 8 pm sharp. That doesn't fix my less-than-fantastic upbringing. I have asthma and I've tried a dozen medications. None work. Why? Because I'm kinda stressed. I smoked weed and my brain was all "oh hell no" and snapped. Now I'm twice as stressed out. Too much weight on a bridge and it will collapse. Now you gotta get the shit off and rebuild the bridge. It's either gonna take cranes and bulldozers, or you can just sit and cry about it.

I'm crying because bulldozers are expensive! I'm not a construction worker!


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## guest1234 (Mar 23, 2010)

PositiveThinking! said:


> I think this is sort of a circle:
> 
> Anxiety triggers DP
> DP feeds DP
> ...


Yeah, not to mention how much it must knacker your brain, all the constant thinking and worrying - so then not only do you need to quell the fear but also to then be patient and let your brain have a bloody good rest - this involves basically distracting yourself as much as possible so as to not give yourself a chance to sit thinking and analysing, worrying about symptoms (thus tiring brain even more) - THEN your brain can get the rest it needs but what people tend not to appreciate is it will take a long time for this to happen and it will be very gradual. I'm talking months at least here, I think what a lot of people do is try the distraction, not worrying etc approach for say a few weeks but then give up when they see no effect and go back to worrying and trying to find a 'cure' (which doesn't make much sense, how can you cure what is in effect a natural feedback mechanism - you can't - you have to stop feeding it to stop it - although it depends if you have underlying or co-existing conditons)
It took me over a year once I had mastered the not worrying and just living thing before I actually started to feel improvement.

The other thing is you have to stop worrying about individual symptoms, put it all under the anxiety/dp umbrella and give it no further attention. Again this takes practise and time. You have to totally accept that you are running at below par at the moment and that it is going to be this way for a while. Stop pushing it away and resisting it - that amounts to resisting healing in effect. Instead let it wash over you with as little resistance as possible (again I will use the water flowing over and around things and not resisting them image) and let recovery come to you when it is ready.
I'm only too aware of how much easier said than done it is but I know when I was dp I had to remind myself these things quite a lot so it never hurts to say it all again.

The 'giving your brain a chance to rest and recover' idea is where I think Paul David (author of 'at last a life' - anxietynomore.co.uk) is spot on. Definitely recommend having a read of his book, it was what started me on the right path.

Bear - I think that is a brilliant analogy


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

guest1234 said:


> Yeah, not to mention how much it must knacker your brain, all the constant thinking and worrying - so then not only do you need to quell the fear but also to then be patient and let your brain have a bloody good rest - this involves basically distracting yourself as much as possible so as to not give yourself a chance to sit thinking and analysing, worrying about symptoms (thus tiring brain even more) - THEN your brain can get the rest it needs but what people tend not to appreciate is it will take a long time for this to happen and it will be very gradual. I'm talking months at least here, I think what a lot of people do is try the distraction, not worrying etc approach for say a few weeks but then give up when they see no effect and go back to worrying and trying to find a 'cure' (which doesn't make much sense, how can you cure what is in effect a natural feedback mechanism - you can't - you have to stop feeding it to stop it - although it depends if you have underlying or co-existing conditons)
> It took me over a year once I had mastered the not worrying and just living thing before I actually started to feel improvement.
> 
> The other thing is you have to stop worrying about individual symptoms, put it all under the anxiety/dp umbrella and give it no further attention. Again this takes practise and time. You have to totally accept that you are running at below par at the moment and that it is going to be this way for a while. Stop pushing it away and resisting it - that amounts to resisting healing in effect. Instead let it wash over you with as little resistance as possible (again I will use the water flowing over and around things and not resisting them image) and let recovery come to you when it is ready.
> ...


I can't even reach a week of clean thoughts, the max I can take without thinking of anything stupid is like a day, and that's already a miracle


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## guest1234 (Mar 23, 2010)

PositiveThinking! said:


> I can't even reach a week of clean thoughts, the max I can take without thinking of anything stupid is like a day, and that's already a miracle


Like I said, it takes practice. Just keep at it and keep finding things to distract yourself. Don't beat yourself up over setbacks, just keep trying.


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

guest1234 said:


> Like I said, it takes practice. Just keep at it and keep finding things to distract yourself. Don't beat yourself up over setbacks, just keep trying.


Yep.. takes a lot of practice I guess


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## Ivan Hawk (Jan 22, 2010)

My opinion feels depersonalization is when your world slows down around you and many changes in your lifestyle are strongly desired. A splash of cold water to the face is needed to make these changes.

Think hard about what you "do the most" and what you "truly enjoy." Find things that currently fall under both categories and then think of new things that can easily or realistically fall under both categories for you as well. The more enjoyment you can adjust into your daily lifestyle the more involved you will grow and the more you will remember who you are.

It is not inappropriate to reassess one's own life - look back, look at the now and perhaps render a realistically more enjoyable future with what is available. Keep certain desires in mind and you'll be more likely to subconsciously make the choices that help lead towards those outcomes.

-

I feel another problem right now with society influencing DP in people is the fact that the world is indeed overly observant of it's surroundings through digital means. This is clearly a true statement when a huge portion of the world's population is communicating less in it's free time face to face and watching more television, using more computers, using more cell phones, relying on video games for entertainment, and in certain extreme cases - spending months/years in a virtual reality over the internet most of the their hours each day.

It's all wonderful technology, but we are not exactly designed for this much artificial and isolated stimulation and the strange side effects are growing more apparent in many different ways with both introverted and extroverted people. People used to hold unorganized outdoor play on a more daily basis over 20+ years ago. Now, so many things are artificially stimulated, pre-planned, mandatory and virtually taken care of that even the sense of reality is beginning to feel artificial and pre-planned. perhaps one solution is to reduce the use of plans and increase indulgence in the spontaneity of life.

think about it.







share your ideas


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