# realizing an important thing



## va2 (Dec 28, 2011)

I realized that part of what causes my dpdr is the fact that there is a discrepancy between my emotions and my rational side. While I am doing my best to be "tough" about my sentimental situation and life in general, inside, deep down I REALLY feel different and should pay more attention to that side. just realizing this helped me a lot. i hope it can help others too.


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## Lostwanderer (Jan 31, 2011)

I sort of understand. I get the "just be tough" mentality a lot and it always feels like a false positivity, or false perserverance. Like you said, inside you feel way different. 
Im actually feeling this way right now- trying to suck it up and push through but i cant get over this different feeling deep down. I guess I feel like no matter how tough I try to make myself, the memory of dp just stays in my mind and its hard to accept.

The tough mentality is much better than being completely defenseless against the fear in my experience.


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## kate_edwin (Aug 9, 2009)

Most people have an emotional side and a rational side, that's natural, and there is a natural decrepancy between the two. Maybe the dp makes the differneces more obvious or palpable. The trick is to find a ballance between the two


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## Lostwanderer (Jan 31, 2011)

I actually just thought about this again and now realize what you were getting at. I am getting in touch with my emotional side as well and it has helped. Just releasing the built up tension instead of feeling like I have to "tough it out" helps.


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## kate_edwin (Aug 9, 2009)

check out a dbt workbook for a whole chapter on how to balance out rational and emotional parts of your mind


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## free2Bme (Aug 20, 2010)

kate_edwin said:


> check out a dbt workbook for a whole chapter on how to balance out rational and emotional parts of your mind


Hi kate_edwin,

I ran across this just recently, is this what you are referring to?

Skills Training Manual for Treating Borderline Personality Disorder [Paperback]
Marsha M. Linehan (Author)

This book is a step-by-step guide to teaching clients four sets of skills: interpersonal effectiveness, emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and mindfulness. A vital component in Dr. Linehan's comprehensive treatment program, the manual details precisely how to implement DBT behavioral skills training procedures. It provides everything the clinician needs to implement the program in skills training groups or with individual clients. Included are lecture notes, discussion questions, exercises, and practical advice on dealing with frequently encountered problems. In a large-size format with lay-flat binding for easy photocopying, the book features over three dozen reproducible client handouts and homework sheets.

From amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Training-Treating-Borderline-Personality-Disorder/dp/0898620341/ref=pd_sim_b_1/185-9620574-8571608

Though initially geared towards BPD, many of the exercises can be used outside of BPD. I haven't read it, but did manage to find a website that talked about it (unfortunately, I can no longer access that site...but did print out some of the worksheets about how to regulate emotions and found it extremely helpful.)


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