# Question about emotional flatness/numbness



## Tyler123 (Nov 13, 2013)

Hello, I am new here. I have a question for those with emotional flatness or have had it and recovered. The best way I can describe myself right now is that I don't feel anything. Everything feels like a thought. I have had what I think is Depersonalization now for about 6 years 24/7 but the emotional flattening has only come about recently. The question is for those who feel this way, did the emotions flatten gradually? I can remember when mine began to fade about a year ago and month after month I felt more and more numb. I don't feel anything - happiness, sadness, anxiety, fear, nothing. I remember it was only a couple months ago that I woke up feeling absolutely nothing. Before that it would decrease from feeling 100% of my emotions to 90, 80, 70, etc. I can't even cry anymore. Could it be DP that causes this feeling to get worse and worse over a year or would it be overnight? And if so, has anyone recovered? I know I wasn't born this way, I just want some answers. Please let me know if my questions weren't clear enough. Thank you for your help.


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## seafoamwaves (Sep 20, 2013)

Do you have any addictions ? (Internet, porn, etc.)

btw my emotions started to get less and less too.


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## Tyler123 (Nov 13, 2013)

Yes, actually, I put some time into thinking about it for awhile and I do catch onto addictions quite easily. At the moment, internet and soda would definitely be at the top of the list haha. Alcohol used to be a problem but I have stopped a little while ago.


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## seafoamwaves (Sep 20, 2013)

Hmmm. My best advice is to stop focusing on how you feel, you might be numbing them unintentionally. Read the weebly article called "NOTHING WORKS"


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

Tyler123 said:


> Hello, I am new here. I have a question for those with emotional flatness or have had it and recovered. The best way I can describe myself right now is that I don't feel anything. Everything feels like a thought. I have had what I think is Depersonalization now for about 6 years 24/7 but the emotional flattening has only come about recently. The question is for those who feel this way, did the emotions flatten gradually? I can remember when mine began to fade about a year ago and month after month I felt more and more numb. I don't feel anything - happiness, sadness, anxiety, fear, nothing. I remember it was only a couple months ago that I woke up feeling absolutely nothing. Before that it would decrease from feeling 100% of my emotions to 90, 80, 70, etc. I can't even cry anymore. Could it be DP that causes this feeling to get worse and worse over a year or would it be overnight? And if so, has anyone recovered? I know I wasn't born this way, I just want some answers. Please let me know if my questions weren't clear enough. Thank you for your help.


I have this too, its emotional flatness. The therapist says it is from PTSD however, I often wonder if it is more then that. My best advice is to see a LP (Licensed Psychologist) and be completely open and honest with him or her. Do you have any of the following symptoms: Social withdrawal/isolation, Insomnia and or a reverse in sleep habit (sleep all day up all night) Disorganized thinking or speech (thoughts jumping from one to another with loose relativity or problems trying to say what you want to say, kind of like a stutter or a "brain fart?") Bizarre thoughts that seem kind of off but you can kind of ignore it (why are people looking at me weird? or something like that) Hear any mumbling or whispering, seeing things that might not be there but you don't really know? Those are something's that a LP might ask to get more insight. I am NOT A DOC OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT. I am just suggesting you consider if you have any of the above symptoms.


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

I forgot to add that I have it still and haven't recovered I have kind of had it sense my teen years. People around notice it, its like I am numb and cold no emotions or as my grandmother says "heaviness" I think its from depression. I don't feel sad or anything I just cant feel anything really, and I have the physical symptoms of depression. I do believe it gets better but it takes effort, its a fight if you will. I can hide it most times other times I cant. It could be maladaptive to mood as well. Have you been diagnosed with anything by the way?


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## Guest (Nov 13, 2013)

What's interesting to me is that I was emotionally numb most of my life do to emotional reasons, but I never noticed until I developed DP/DR a year ago purely because people said it was symptom. The changes in my emotional state were simply that I was freaking out to much to feel in any way good and I was hunting for symptoms so the numbness I had for years suddenly became a huge issue. Now that I've calmed down and don't really worry about DP/DR I can honestly say my emotions haven't changed all that much.


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## cem (Jul 11, 2013)

In my experience, the emotional detachment that accompanies DP is very different from the emotional numbing/flattening that happens when your brain decides you can't consciously handle the suffering that your emotions are causing you and completely shuts them off. I've experienced both unfortunately, but I've also recovered from DP in both circumstances.

If you're only dealing with DP, your emotions will come back instantaneously when you reintegrate your body. However, if you've been numbed out by your brain (seems like you have and a few others on this website have from what I've seen), it will be a waiting game to fully regain 100% of your emotions even when you re-integrate, and they won't all come back at the same time either.

As for your other question, I didn't numb out 100% overtime, everything happened instantaneously. I was having the worst panic attack of my life and experiencing intense DR and had to go on a walk with my girlfriend just to keep myself sane. After about 10 minutes of walking in my panic I realized that.. I just didn't feel anything anymore. Nothing, not even anxiety or panic. I actually tried to induce another panic attack just to feel anything, but I couldn't even feel anxious anymore. I had lost all emotion. It felt like I had just died and I remember looking at my girlfriend of 2 1/2 years who I had been incredibly in love with and literally feeling nothing. It was pretty traumatic for me. I'd rather go through life having panic attacks everyday than be totally numbed out.

Anyway, I've since recovered from DP and I'm still not totally back yet emotionally. But things have definitely gotten better. At first, I wasn't able to connect to anything at all. I've always been huge into movies and I remember seeing The Great Gatsby a couple days after I had numbed out and I just couldn't give a shit at all about any of the movie whatsoever. About 4 months later now and I'm able to connect to movies again, my animals, friends, family and most importantly my girlfriend, but I know I'm not 100% back emotionally. It sucks, but it's getting better. Don't think you'll be a zombie the rest of your life.

But be prepared because your emotions will be extremely overwhelming when you begin to experience them again. I remember feeling agitated (the first emotion to fully come back) for the first time again and it was absolutely an unbearable feeling after not having to deal with it for so long, lol. Just accept them as they come back because we need our emotions. They provide us with an incredible amount of information about ourselves and our surroundings. It's what makes us human and allows us to connect.

I've posted this on here before, but here's the best representation of emotional numbness that I've ever read. It also saved my life. You'll get better dude. http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

Yes I have this too I feel nothing no fear, anxiety or happiness. I can cry though but other then that absolute NOTHING it is very very strange to have dp without panic attacks and anxiety

Feels like ur not even a human being anymore
:/


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

I'm so glad u wrote this post...it really is how I'm feeling and I always wondered if there was anyone else who feels this way


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## heartless (Apr 29, 2013)

missjess said:


> Yes I have this too I feel nothing no fear, anxiety or happiness. I can cry though but other then that absolute NOTHING it is very very strange to have dp without panic attacks and anxiety
> 
> Feels like ur not even a human being anymore
> :/


you can cry, but why? start there and keep going with your thoughts


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## Pmz623 (Sep 15, 2013)

ok so when everyone says they dont have emotions does that mean you all cant be happy at all for a little bit. There are times in my day, where I feel like im in a good mood or happy. Like talking to a cute girl or working out. I mean its not great happiness, but i puts me in a good mood. I dont feel normal regarless, but it still does change my mood.

does anyone else get that same response? o


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## missjess (Jun 1, 2012)

When I say that I lost emotional connection to the world .... I only have chronic derealization which blocks me from experiencing the world emotionally but I feel completely flat lined because of it


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## Pmz623 (Sep 15, 2013)

Hmm. I guess my dp isn't that bad anymore. Because I feel like I can def get depressed and get happy at times. Its just not on the level I'm used to so to me it seems so numb. But I would really consider today a good day and I had a lot of fun.

Like if u were to do any activity normally considered fun. How would you respond to it? Can u have fun? What do u do for fun?


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## Pmz623 (Sep 15, 2013)

I think I really just experience disassociation with depression rather numbness. Emotions are less so I guess u can consider that numbed. But im not void of being sad or happy. U once felt like I was.


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## miguelmalato (Jan 9, 2012)

I find this strange... I also noticed that, despite the highest peak of my Depersonalization happened pretty quickly, it was only 3 years later that I realized my emotional capacity had been completly depleted.


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

I was/am kind of paranoid about the flat affect I have. Its pretty severe and can be a symptom of schizophrenia, also in PTSD and major depression (which I have been diagnosed with PTSD and MDD). I completely space out when I look at people. Its like I am looking right through them (not literally). You know what I mean? Like I am totally spaced out and numb its like lights on nobody home most times. Its kind of sad but I have been so emotionally run down that I look like a zombie. I don't even take any medications either so it cant be blamed on that. Its tough, but I am starting to not be able to feel fear even which is a good thing I guess. I am getting to the point were I am almost accepting of anything that happens, it really helps to remove fear when you accept things and stop fighting.

Its a bummer to be so numb and spacy all the time, I avoid eye contact to because I don't want to creep people out by looking like I am zoned out hahah. I was looking at my teacher and I completely zoned out talking to her. I could see she looked at me weird because I was so zoned out but that's the price of being traumatized, depressed and stressed. It don't bother me anymore as much as it did but I still worry


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

I found this interesting

"Either while experiencing or after experiencing the distressing event, the individual has 3 or more of the following dissociative symptoms:


A subjective sense of numbing, detachment, or absence of emotional responsiveness
A reduction in awareness of his or her surroundings (e.g., "being in a daze")
Derealization
Depersonalization"

The above is symptomatic of Acute Distress Disorder , however I believe these to be in PTSD as well although the dsm doesn't include it for ptsd, I don't think?


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