# Is this the same as soul loss



## CoffeeGirl9

I feel all aspects of my soul is completely gone. More so then ever before. I am heartless. Bearing no soul or the ability to connect with anything or anyone.

Please help.


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## ThoughtOnFire

I believe what people have called "Loss of the Soul" in past times and other circles is the same as DP/DR. Thing is, imho, it only *feels* like you've lost your Soul. My reasoning? What's suffering from this loss if not the Soul itself? Without the Soul, then there wouldn't be anything left to suffer.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> I believe what people have called "Loss of the Soul" in past times and other circles is the same as DP/DR. Thing is, imho, it only *feels* like you've lost your Soul. My reasoning? What's suffering from this loss if not the Soul itself? Without the Soul, then there wouldn't be anything left to suffer.


Well it's quite the strong feeling then. I mean i don't have the ability to even sleep right now. The soul does leave the body as I am experiencing this a lot. But you are saying the soul is not all lost or gone? It's still there somewhere?


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## ThoughtOnFire

I'm saying that if there is a soul then that is who you are. Assuming that's true, *you* would have left and gone away and called this disorder "Body Loss". Also, out of body symptoms, just feelings imho. Because there are OBE/NDE's where individuals actually leave their bodies and look down from above, etc. I have Soul Loss feelings and Out of Body feelings too, but I haven't gone anywhere and haven't looked down on my body. Some may have though, experienced looking down on their body maybe during sleep or something, but that's fleeting. My point is if we were really out of body, soul loss, then we wouldn't be coming from the bodies perspective.


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## ThoughtOnFire

My main point though is arguing that if you are a soul, then these feelings wouldn't bother you if you really lost your soul. Because what would be the Self in you that is feeling all the pain of this?


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> I'm saying that if there is a soul then that is who you are. Assuming that's true, *you* would have left and gone away and called this disorder "Body Loss". Also, out of body symptoms, just feelings imho. Because there are OBE/NDE's where individuals actually leave their bodies and look down from above, etc. I have Soul Loss feelings and Out of Body feelings too, but I haven't gone anywhere and haven't looked down on my body. Some may have though, experienced looking down on their body maybe during sleep or something, but that's fleeting. My point is if we were really out of body, soul loss, then we wouldn't be coming from the bodies perspective.


I don't know if I am following completely.. All I have right now is an empty body/ completely hollow of humanness. To me, I am gone. What was me, my soul, essence as a human being, is no more. I no longer control any part of me. I do not occupy my body whatsoever


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> My main point though is arguing that if you are a soul, then these feelings wouldn't bother you if you really lost your soul. Because what would be the Self in you that is feeling all the pain of this?


I don't have that self in me. It's my body that is super uncomfortable. I am now in a sense my body which is not true hence the discomfort. It's so confusing. All i know is that whoever was here is no longer here the same at least. I don't react or feel anything. I don't know who ppl are. I am not me


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> My main point though is arguing that if you are a soul, then these feelings wouldn't bother you if you really lost your soul. Because what would be the Self in you that is feeling all the pain of this?


I think I get what you are saying now. Sorry I am so slow lately. You are saying that more so my body is lost and I would agree with that. My biggest complaint is that I can't feel my body or my physicality. Someone is experiencing that and that is me, the soul. The soul is not lost, it's the body that is lost/ disconnected.


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## ThoughtOnFire

Yes you got it! Whatever we are, a Soul, or our Consciousness, it's actively rejecting the body/mind. That's just how I see it currently anyway.

Or if you prefer, our own mind is dissociating/resisting itself.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> Yes you got it! Whatever we are, a Soul, or our Consciousness, it's actively rejecting the body/mind. That's just how I see it currently anyway.
> Or if you prefer, our own mind is dissociating/resisting itself.


I agree. That makes sense. It's living hell. Is our sense of self totally brought on by the brain? Any suggestions for living like this?


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## CoffeeGirl9

Or i should say any suggestions for not existing? Without the body I mean do we even exist? Everything that exists is physical,


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## ThoughtOnFire

What I do is meditate or be mindful of the constant resistance and then be accepting of the self/body/mind. To cope I try to find enjoyment in the small things; a cup of coffee, a conversation with a friend, a meal or chocolate. I understand though, you're at a place right now where everything is the same nothingness and lacks meaning. For that I'd say just keep going one day a time, and be proud of yourself for having survived this long. And know "This too shall pass."


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> What I do is meditate or be mindful of the constant resistance and then be accepting of the self/body/mind. To cope I try to find enjoyment in the small things; a cup of coffee, a conversation with a friend, a meal or chocolate. I understand though, you're at a place right now where everything is the same nothingness and lacks meaning. For that I'd say just keep going one day a time, and be proud of yourself for having survived this long. And know "This too shall pass."


Can you feel your actions? I cannot


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## ThoughtOnFire

I've not been able to feel my actions in the past, more so during the first years, and sometimes can still get that way.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> I've not been able to feel my actions in the past, more so during the first years, and sometimes can still get that way.


Why does the body and mind see something as a threat from so long ago? Like the further we get away from what happened the worse it gets.


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## ThoughtOnFire

Could be kind of like an autoimmune disorder but for the mind. Autoimmune disorders are when the body attacks otherwise healthy organs. This could be the same thing but for the psyche.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> Could be kind of like an autoimmune disorder but for the mind. Autoimmune disorders are when the body attacks otherwise healthy organs. This could be the same thing but for the psyche.


Did you feel completely removed from your body as though you weren't controlling it at all? Sorry that's where i am these last couple of days and i am terrified of it and terrified of the unknown bc of it


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> Could be kind of like an autoimmune disorder but for the mind. Autoimmune disorders are when the body attacks otherwise healthy organs. This could be the same thing but for the psyche.


Do you believe it is all anxiety based?


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## ThoughtOnFire

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> Did you feel completely removed from your body as though you weren't controlling it at all? Sorry that's where i am these last couple of days and i am terrified of it and terrified of the unknown bc of it


Yeah I have been there


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## ThoughtOnFire

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> Do you believe it is all anxiety based?


I really don't think so. I don't have anxiety anymore and I know others who don't either. Anxiety certainly does make it a lot worse though. And anxiety is prevalent in the DP'd community.


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## CoffeeGirl9

So i haven't slept in weeks bc of my dp episode. It's very bad right now. Very out of reality. My body does not sleep.

I don't have any connection with my body and I think that's a huge part of it.

Any suggestions other then waiting this out?


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## ThoughtOnFire

This first thing to do would be taking something to help you sleep.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> This first thing to do would be taking something to help you sleep.


If it was only that simple. I am in total flight or fight mode. My body won't do it


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## ThoughtOnFire

You have lots of anxiety? Racing thoughts?


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> You have lots of anxiety? Racing thoughts?


I wouldn't call them thoughts. But yes anxiety galore. But I have zero connection to myself. Or body. As you know. I am sitting by the mirror doing my hair and it's completely confusing. It's not me


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## CoffeeGirl9

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> I wouldn't call them thoughts. But yes anxiety galore. But I have zero connection to myself. Or body. As you know. I am sitting by the mirror doing my hair and it's completely confusing. It's not me


Totally nonexistent.


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## ThoughtOnFire

How I defeated life long anxiety was to take Aspirin. I took about 240 mg per day for a few months, then 240mg per every other day for a few months, then as needed. I grew up having anxiety attacks even before DP/DR started. It works because Aspirin is a blood thinner. Anxiety is mostly our brains doing and it needs extra blood flowing to the head to keep going. Aspirin equalizes blood flow and equally distributes it evenly throughout the body. Thus the Anxiety loses it's fuel and dissipates like a fever. Anxiety is a big momentum and taking Aspirin really disrupts this seemingly non stop force.


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## CoffeeGirl9

How does your body disappear? How does it feel like it’s a ghost? Not taking up anything? I can’t walk very well. My body has no real physicality anymore. You could walk right through me? How does it get to this point?


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## ThoughtOnFire

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> How does your body disappear? How does it feel like it's a ghost? Not taking up anything? I can't walk very well. My body has no real physicality anymore. You could walk right through me? How does it get to this point?


idk but that was the first thing I thought of when I was in my first few days of this, that I was Ghost now. Looked in the mirror for a long time like what the fuck happened to me? I'd say those sensations didn't really go away all these years later. But I have grown stronger in spirit over it. It's still there but doesn't bother me as much.


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## CoffeeGirl9

Think of it, you aren’t in your body and you have to get up and go to work everyday. You have no idea what a body is anymore or what it’s like to be human or real. You have vanished. How would you lay down and sleep everynight if you aren’t there?


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> idk but that was the first thing I thought of when I was in my first few days of this, that I was Ghost now. Looked in the mirror for a long time like what the fuck happened to me? I'd say those sensations didn't really go away all these years later. But I have grown stronger in spirit over it. It's still there but doesn't bother me as much.


So you never have gotten your body back? You aren't connected to your body?


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## ThoughtOnFire

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> Think of it, you aren't in your body and you have to get up and go to work everyday. You have no idea what a body is anymore or what it's like to be human or real. You have vanished. How would you lay down and sleep everynight if you aren't there?


This disorder should truly be classified as a legit debilitation.


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## ThoughtOnFire

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> So you never have gotten your body back? You aren't connected to your body?


I'm working on that.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> This disorder should truly be classified as a legit debilitation.


I want to die. It's not worth living


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## ThoughtOnFire

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> I want to die. It's not worth living


I think what we all really want is to LIVE again, not dp'd.


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## CoffeeGirl9

[quote name="ThoughtOnFire" post="571730" timestamp="1524192322"]

I think what we all really want is to LIVE again, not dp'd.[/quote

Abso fucking lutely but it's not possible. So I really want to die


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## CoffeeGirl9

"You do not have a soul. You are a soul who has a body"

It's so hard to decipher what has happened. I am a shell. My soul left and went somewhere


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## ThoughtOnFire

You are not alone in this!


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> You are not alone in this!


Yes i am!!! No one is here to support me. I don't have anyone. Dp self help isn't even real to me. I am an empty body without a human being inside of it. There is no "being"

No one I mean no one can survive like this!


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## ThoughtOnFire

You've made it this far, that's something to be proud of.


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## CoffeeGirl9

ThoughtOnFire said:


> You've made it this far, that's something to be proud of.


No I haven't. "I" have gone away. It feels like the only thing I am doing is keeping my body alive at this point. I feel choked by my own body. My whole essence/soul is gone as far as I know. My existence is no longer with my body.


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