# FEELING ISOLATED JUST JOINED HELP TO GET STARTED PLEASE



## dixie (Nov 14, 2006)

i LIVE IN UNITED KINGDOM, FINDING IT HARD TO TALK TO PEOPLE AS THEY SEE A DIFFERENT SIDE OF ME THAN I ACTUALLY FEEL. I AM REALLY FEELING THE STRAIN LATELY AS I AM FED UP OF ACTING, FED UP OF TALKING TO PEOPLE AND I THEN SWITCH AND DONT KNOW WHAT THEY ARE ON ABOUT BUT OVER THE YEARS HAVE LEARNT A GREAT SKILL OF PRETENCE TO SAVE ME GET CONFUSED AND THEM GETTING CONFUSED. HATE EXPERIENCES OF DOING SOMETHING OR SEEING SOMEONE AS IF IT IS THE FIRST TIME. SO TIRING AND I AM FED UP OF TRYING TO RELAY THIS TO MY MENTAL HEALTH TEAM. DIXIE


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## flowingly (Aug 28, 2005)

welcome, dixie 

i'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time. i hope this forum helps you- or at least find something here to help you cope


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## chiendeguerre (Nov 12, 2006)

Hi

My names paul, I live in Liverpool.

You seem pretty distraught. I know what you mean about acting, constantly making allowances for peoples ignorance not only of your condition but their unconscious prejudices.

I had a conversation yesterday in college. This fella, mid 20's, was talking to me. I was telling him about my unique perception and how I feel like I need to seek common ground with people in order to feel a sense of security.

He said, "Not everyone's gonna like you".

Later on in class, I was thinking about our conversation and something occured to me. I turned to him and, reminding him of the earlier conversation, asked if he had said, "Not everyone is going to like you", or, "You don't have to like everyone".

He answered that he had said the former then turned away in thought.

A moment later he turned to me and said, "But you dont have to like everyone". He was visibly shaken as he said this and I realsied something. I was trying to find common ground with this bloke but it was because he didn't like me. I was doing what I was conditioned to do and I knew it felt wrong but I couldn't help it.

He was only going along with his conditioning but here is the rub. We don't get on. Thats just the way it is. I am saddened by this. I can see he has good qualities but we are not compatible and that is that.

I need to make him aware of this.


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## dixie (Nov 14, 2006)

flowingly said:


> welcome, dixie
> 
> i'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time. i hope this forum helps you- or at least find something here to help you cope


thanks for your message much appreciated, makes me feel in contact with someone who knows thanks dixie


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## dixie (Nov 14, 2006)

thanks paul
it was good reading your message and i feel i have made some contact you make a lot of sense cheers dixie


chiendeguerre said:


> Hi
> 
> My names paul, I live in Liverpool.
> 
> ...


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## chiendeguerre (Nov 12, 2006)

Hi

I was chuffed to see your return post.

I only got on this the other day also. I'm having a tough time getting responses to posts. I guess people have a lot on their minds.

Anyhow, would it be ok if I asked about you? where you from ? musical tastes etc?

I live in Liverpool. I haven't actually made use of the Mental health system. I think its completely crap. My mother had a breakdown when I was a kid and the mental health system in Merseyside is fkn garbage. pardon the french but i get angry everytime I think of it. She was a beautiful woman and her life went down the toilet.

Maybe you could tell me some of your experiences within the mental health system these days. I still hold a deep deep mistrust of them

I think I might lean toward antipsychiatry. Theres nothing wrong with me. Its the world thats mad.


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## dixie (Nov 14, 2006)

HI

I live in Somerset. Unemployed and been suffering with problems for the last ten years. My musical tastes anything really, like all tastes of music especially if it is performed live.

My experience of the mental health system is relatively good. There have been bad points to it too. I think where the main problem lies most of the time is inadequate training of staff, but at the end of the day they make mistakes which is ok as long as they learn from them and admit them. They can cause added problems too, so sometimes have mixed feelings about it all. I have friends who have opted out of the system and friends that are in the system. I have recently had a lot of support down here in somerset and they try there best with the limited amount of funds they get and the staff themselves get frustrated they cant do more. Unfortunately so much money goes in the pockets of the corrupt people and the true professionals that are good at their jobs normally leave or the others that try not to get too involved in the politics of everything.
I think everybody has to decide their own path which is good for them.
Some people think therapy is good others feel it doesnt help.
sorry to hear you had a bad time, sounded like you had a deep bond with your mother that you had lost, very distressing for you.
I agree with you the world is mad, the people that have mental health problems I have found are the sanest we can see the madness.
there was a story once that a friend said to me whilst in hospital she asked why the nurse was locking the door she said is it because you dont want to let us out the nurse replied no I am trying to stop the others coming in meaning it was the ones outside that were the problem.

take care dixie

I was chuffed to see your return post.

I only got on this the other day also. I'm having a tough time getting responses to posts. I guess people have a lot on their minds.

Anyhow, would it be ok if I asked about you? where you from ? musical tastes etc?

I live in Liverpool. I haven't actually made use of the Mental health system. I think its completely crap. My mother had a breakdown when I was a kid and the mental health system in Merseyside is fkn garbage. pardon the french but i get angry everytime I think of it. She was a beautiful woman and her life went down the toilet.

Maybe you could tell me some of your experiences within the mental health system these days. I still hold a deep deep mistrust of them

I think I might lean toward antipsychiatry. Theres nothing wrong with me. Its the world thats mad.[/quote]


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## chiendeguerre (Nov 12, 2006)

Hi

Thanks dixie, your affirmation is tremendously important and valuable to me.

Yeh, my mum was my world when I was a small child, I was about 13 when she died and was replaced by a poor wretch. The guilt I feel is awful, I joined in with the scapegoating. What the f* did I know?

have you read any good books on the subject of families?

"Families And How To Survive Them", is a good one. John Cleese & Robyn Skinner.


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## dixie (Nov 14, 2006)

hi
Thats awful your loss of your mum at such a vunerable age when you need guidance and beginning to look at the world to step out into. Then replaced with someone awful. I am not sure why you should be so guilty?
What the hell did you do, did you think you were responsible in some way because if you did YOU DEFINITELY WEREN'T no young person should ever feel responsible.
My dad lost his mother when young and he also had a witch of a replacement mother who worked him tirelessy and brought in her son which she put first.
My dad hated her and it left him with a bad taste for women which in turn he detached from me quite a lot, he didnt mean too but the pattern somehow followed through which I am now trying to break with him and get him to try and understand.
I havnt read families although I understand it is very good. Reading is difficult for me I feel the concentration for too long is hard.
Thanks for email take care dixie

Thanks dixie, your affirmation is tremendously important and valuable to me.

Yeh, my mum was my world when I was a small child, I was about 13 when she died and was replaced by a poor wretch. The guilt I feel is awful, I joined in with the scapegoating. What the f* did I know?

have you read any good books on the subject of families?

"Families And How To Survive Them", is a good one. John Cleese & Robyn Skinner.[/quote]


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## Stan (Nov 18, 2006)

Hi. I've read "Families and how to survive them". It was excellent and quite an easy read !!!


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## dixie (Nov 14, 2006)

thanks stan
i am going in for a detox next week in a unit and i will try and get the book to readm may help to pass the time although i dont normally read. cheers dixie


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## mind^partizan (Nov 11, 2006)

Welcome Dixie. I know, there arent a lot of replies to the posts, but I come here almost every day and usually write posts... we cant leave this place stagnated :?


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