# Worried



## UKMike (May 7, 2009)

Im worried that i may have started to exhibit signs of Depersonalization disorder, i haven't seen myself from outside my body, i do not feel disconnected from my body at any time, i am always conscious in my mind and in complete control of my actions; mentally and physically, but i do feel as though i am not quite myself, as in I'm "unsettled". I had problems last year with housemates and had a massive falling out with my best mates, much like recovering from a divorce; it made me low and stressed; not depressed, but low. I did have a bad weed experience over christmas, but within hours of the experience i was back to my normal self, 2 weeks later i returned to my unhappy new house where i locked myself away as i didnt get on with anybody there, a month later; whilst having to give a presentation in class; i had my first ever anxiety attack, i have one more of these, although my head tremors continued due to my stressful environment, they cleared and then another 2 weeks later i started to feel unsettled and odd, is it likely this could be just a reaction to help me recover from the stress of it all or could it be depersonalization from the trip ...... ive only found this disorder online, and now im becoming obsessed with it, see a councillor for the first time on monday and im hoping that people on here can help put my mind at ease.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, Mike.


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## UKMike (May 7, 2009)

you can probably relate to my worry but one more question; of those who got it from weed; did it start the next day ?! as i was fine for a couple of months after my trip, didn't even think about it much afterwards.


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## Guest (May 7, 2009)

Hi Mike.

I've been depersonalised since mid-November of last year. In that time I've never seen myself from outside my body, never felt disconnected from my body, always been concious, been in control (though perhaps not really felt like it) mentally and physically.

Have you ever had a panic attack? If yes, would you describe how you're feeling as the part of the panic attack which makes you feel like you're going crazy? Because if you would, I'd say you're depersonalised.

Mine was weed-induced. Sort of. By which I mean I used to smoke weed a lot, and on the last occasion (I've been too shit-scared to ever smoke again), I had my first panic attack. Then I started having panic attacks without having smoked weed. They increased in frequency up until the point I was having them each day. The one day, the 'going crazy' component of the panic attacks didn't subside with the end of the panic attacks, and from that moment on, I've been depersonalised.

So in answer to your question: no, there was a substantial gap - several years as it happens - between smoking weed and becoming depersonalised.

If you don't mind me asking, where in Blighty do you live, Mike?


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## UKMike (May 7, 2009)

Wow, really wasnt the answer i was looking for, how do you feel depersonalized then ? im from Essex and im currently very worried. Ive only had one panic attack, and no i don't relate how i feel now with any part of the panic or anxiety attacks.


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## Guest (May 7, 2009)

Well, I tend to describe depersonalisation - when psychiatrists, GPs, psychiatric nurses or whomever - ask me as...well how I just described it; the going-crazy-feeling part of a panic attack. Except permanent. Then they usually check their watch and say, 'Oh? Well, you don't have that...hmm, that seems to be time. Did you have anything you wanted to ask?'

I didn't mean to worry you. What are you worried about? That you've got depersonalisation? Or something else?


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## UKMike (May 7, 2009)

I'm worried i do have it yeah, merely because the build up appears to be textbook, maybe i just have an imbalance or a deficiency in one vitamin or another, i am just one of those people who look online, self diagnose and then go mad stressing over it, i don't feel like i'm going mad at any time, apart from the times i convince myself something is seriously wrong, i feel 90% all of the time, just not quite "me" i still have the same mind-set just packed full of worry, and the stories of weed causing depersonalization have scared me a lot.


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## UKMike (May 7, 2009)

Any more help would be a massive weight off of my mind.


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## peachy (Feb 9, 2008)

None of your symptoms have jumped off the page as Depersonalization to me. Is there any other symptoms you are experiencing that lead you to believe this could be Depersonalization? It sounds a bit like anxiety in my opinion. You say you aren't experiencing that disconnection from yourself...are you experiencing the world as a disconnect? I think the DSM has a funny way of explaining what exactly DP is because I don't get that feeling that I'm seeing myself from outside my body either...quite the opposite actually. Have you ever had any OCD like tendencies...more so the obsession aspect?


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## shaolinbomber (Mar 28, 2009)

probably just depression. Dont worry about it dude. If your whole reality is not thrown off then you dont have DP/DR. Trust you know when it hits you, cause its like someone dropped 1 ton of bricks on top of your head and permanently dazed you.


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## UKMike (May 7, 2009)

Im over getting down and accepted it can be sorted, but i have to say that i feel privileged to have witnessed the support that you all have for one another, if my doctor/councilor do decide that i'm exhibiting Depersonalization, i know there is support on here, although i'm not sure its best that people spend their time on here rather than trying to live, but its comforting to know that there is a support base, i do relate with many of the symptoms, but i'll guess i'll find out what happens with me in future weeks, good luck to all, its a brilliant hub of support.


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## pwrinkle (Mar 30, 2009)

Hey Mike, keep in mind that the list of symptoms are virtually endless and still endless yet depending on the person. I myself have had it(unknown till this year) since I was very very young and am in my 40's now. And the solution could be any # of things...again depending on the person and their personal situation. Your on the right tract, seeing someone who can help you figure out what is up with you. I'm new in here too and love the open honest forum. Now what I hear from others may not do anything for me but what if that one person says just the thing to help me, it's all worth it. Hang in there and try not to worry too much until you know everything for sure.


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