# Anyone else?



## York (Feb 26, 2008)

My two main symptoms of dp nowadays is

1: I don't feel like myself. AT ALL. Wrong inner feeling, hard to explain. Can't remember what it's supposed to feel like, just not like this.

2: Wrong feeling on top of reality. Also hard to explain. Sort of when you've dreamt about being in another house, or being younger or something, and the feeling sticks with you for a few minutes after waking up.. Only it's been a year.. I'm not always aware of the feeling anymore, until it changes into a different one. That's when it really hits me how ill I must be.

Am I the only one with this thing? It freaks me out, and I'm so tired! I feel psychotic.

Other than that, I'm feeling better


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## Thunderlordcid (Feb 2, 2010)

york said:


> My two main symptoms of dp nowadays is
> 
> 1: I don't feel like myself. AT ALL. Wrong inner feeling, hard to explain. Can't remember what it's supposed to feel like, just not like this.
> 
> ...


I want to say that's exactly where I am at. I had some humongous revelations to some of life's hardest questions in the past month and found out what was the underlying cause of my anxiety. The only real problem is sometimes I want to say I am "Spacing" or "Zoning" out. I notice it when I'm at work. Questions like "Who am I?" and "How did I get here?" Seem to pop up in my head but I know exactly how I got here and where I'm at. It's SOOOO weird. Is this how your feeling too?


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Thunderlordcid said:


> I want to say that's exactly where I am at. I had some humongous revelations to some of life's hardest questions in the past month and found out what was the underlying cause of my anxiety. The only real problem is sometimes I want to say I am "Spacing" or "Zoning" out. I notice it when I'm at work. Questions like "Who am I?" and "How did I get here?" Seem to pop up in my head but I know exactly how I got here and where I'm at. It's SOOOO weird. Is this how your feeling too?


There is a difference between consciously pondering the philosophical questions of "Who am I?" and "How did I get here?" and experiencing dp/dr where you actually get to experience the fear and confusion of being that disconnected from reality. Sometimes I think half of the people on this board mistake their own intelligence for dp/dr, and it is starting to annoy me. Existential and philosophical thinking is NOT dp/dr.

Although I can relate to the spacing out, and im not saying you are one of these people that just "thinks too much" in lack of better words. Sometimes I space out and get the feeling of not knowing who I am. Loss of the sense of self. I still suffer from dp/dr 24/7, When this happens it is just like...more intense.


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## Guest (May 16, 2010)

Inzom said:


> There is a difference between consciously pondering the philosophical questions of "Who am I?" and "How did I get here?" and experiencing dp/dr where you actually get to experience the fear and confusion of being that disconnected from reality. Sometimes I think half of the people on this board mistake their own intelligence for dp/dr, and it is starting to annoy me. Existential and philosophical thinking is NOT dp/dr.
> 
> Although I can relate to the spacing out, and im not saying you are one of these people that just "thinks too much" in lack of better words. Sometimes I space out and get the feeling of not knowing who I am. Loss of the sense of self. I still suffer from dp/dr 24/7, When this happens it is just like...more intense.


I think you are right! While Doctors rarely diagnose someone DP... we here seem to diagnose everyone DP. It makes it confusing to draw a line and say okay this is DP and this is not DP.


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## Guest (May 16, 2010)

york said:


> My two main symptoms of dp nowadays is
> 
> 1: I don't feel like myself. AT ALL. Wrong inner feeling, hard to explain. Can't remember what it's supposed to feel like, just not like this.
> 
> ...


I too am feeling good, but still don't quite feel like myself. It makes it difficult to pinpoint what exactly is the problem. And while I think I would absolutely know if I was recovered, it still can be confusing to analyze DP and wonder if it's going away.


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## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

Inzom said:


> There is a difference between consciously pondering the philosophical questions of "Who am I?" and "How did I get here?" and experiencing dp/dr where you actually get to experience the fear and confusion of being that disconnected from reality. Sometimes I think half of the people on this board mistake their own intelligence for dp/dr, and it is starting to annoy me. Existential and philosophical thinking is NOT dp/dr.
> 
> Although I can relate to the spacing out, and im not saying you are one of these people that just "thinks too much" in lack of better words. Sometimes I space out and get the feeling of not knowing who I am. Loss of the sense of self. I still suffer from dp/dr 24/7, When this happens it is just like...more intense.


What would be an example of something someone has said on this board who has mistaken their own intelligence for DP/DR?

I have existential thinking, but it comes with termendous fear and terror. I would rather not think about who I am, and why we are here on this planet.


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## Guest (May 16, 2010)

York I know what you mean about having the feeling after a dream. I wake up every morning and somehow this "world" I wake up to seems wrong. I feel like I open my eyes to the wrong existance and I seriously have to tell myself every morning not to panic because this is the same place that I wake up every day. I have these same feelings all day long, every day. I drive around the streets that I've lived out reality on, before dp, and have memories of those things but it still just feels wrong.

I also get the sudden panic of "who am I, where am I at?" and it isn't me pondering existance. It just come out of nowhere in a panic.


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## Thunderlordcid (Feb 2, 2010)

Inzom said:


> There is a difference between consciously pondering the philosophical questions of "Who am I?" and "How did I get here?" and experiencing dp/dr where you actually get to experience the fear and confusion of being that disconnected from reality. Sometimes I think half of the people on this board mistake their own intelligence for dp/dr, and it is starting to annoy me. Existential and philosophical thinking is NOT dp/dr.
> 
> Although I can relate to the spacing out, and im not saying you are one of these people that just "thinks too much" in lack of better words. Sometimes I space out and get the feeling of not knowing who I am. Loss of the sense of self. I still suffer from dp/dr 24/7, When this happens it is just like...more intense.


Sorry if I got lost in translation here. I get to the point where I wonder in a literal sense "How did I get here?" It's like "Wow, I'm working, but how did I get here with these people around me?" I can answer these questions myself which is why it honestly doesn't freak me out that much. (That and freaking and panicking NEVER helps anything, in ANY situation. I mean seriously, even in a real life-threatening situation, how is freaking out and being scared going to help you? If my heart was seriously going to fail (a.k.a. Cardiac Arrest, and trust me it doesn't happen to young healthy people so do yourself a favor and don't google what it is)how would freaking out help ANYTHING? It doesn't, which is why I don't do it anymore. If anything I'll go do a light meditation to help me clear some brain fog. )But yeah, sorry if I was unclear with what I previously posted though. And sorry for my long rant, I just posted it so that maybe I can help some people when they get borderline panicky.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

2deepathinker said:


> What would be an example of something someone has said on this board who has mistaken their own intelligence for DP/DR?
> 
> I have existential thinking, but it comes with termendous fear and terror. I would rather not think about who I am, and why we are here on this planet.


You answered your own question.


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## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

Inzom said:


> You answered your own question.


Are you saying that this example is that I am mistaking my own intelligence for DP/DR? If I wouldn't be feeling so disconnected from myself, I wouldn't be asking such a question.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

2deepathinker said:


> Are you saying that this example is that I am mistaking my own intelligence for DP/DR? If I wouldn't be feeling so disconnected from myself, I wouldn't be asking such a question.


Ah, Thats a whole other case when you actually "experience" these horrific feelings. I am sorry for sounding rude. I hope you feel better.


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

When I have more energy and its not 3am I am going to try and clarify what I meant in an attempt to redeem myself, as my posts might have sounded inconsiderate and not very well thought out. Peace.


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## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

It's totally cool! Thanks for clarifying yourself!


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## York (Feb 26, 2008)

I have to make this short but.. I get what all of you are saying. It's a difference between being well and thinking about how it would feel like to be an elephant, and actually experiencing every waking moment, and even dreaming, that you truly are an elephant.
Corny example, but you get it.
I'm never "me". It's got nothing to do with my conscious thoughts, it's like I've had an "emotional stroke", I'm broken, and I can't break through the delusional reality I'm in. It's like I've forced myself to become someone else, thinking it's right, but now I see it's wrong, but then who the hell am I? It's an internal struggle, it's two beings fighting for survival, it's two colors mixing together so much I sometimes believe it's one and I'm o.k.. But now It's separating more and more, and I feel so confused. I've tried to get back to recognizing my self and my home so much I've lost sight of the real thing. I'm acting out a character I thought I remembered was me, but I'm starting to see it's all wrong, I'm me NOW, I'm not me a year ago. Jesus. I've lost it. I've just.. Lost it.


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