# Trying to understand Depression



## Scattered (Mar 8, 2005)

I've been feeling odd the past few days. Its become a normal occurence for a feeling of despair, hopelessness, and sadness to envelope me for a short period of time (anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour), and then simply vanish. This happens more than a couple times daily, then at night I start to feel depressed again. I'll relax, go to sleep, wake up a few times in the middle of the night feeling insane but ultimately get at least 6 hours in.

Why does this happen? Has anyone else had the experience of "waves" of depression that come on, peak, decline, and then return to normalcy. It scares me that my emotions can be so fickle and change so quickly. For now I simple ride the wave until I feel normal again. When I feel normal its as if I was never depressed, when I feel depressed even for a short amount of time its as if I'll never be ok again. The cycle never really breaks and I am afraid that the depression will sort of break off and become my normal state of existence. Its odd to understand DP and yet be so confused by such a much more common thing, depression.


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