# I think I know the underlying issue



## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

So I think I know what is wrong with me personally... I started working through the most traumatic event in my life (death of mother and finding her) This is the game plan in therapy: Talk about the experience and process the emotions and come to put it to rest.

I started today and I was able to shed a few tears, it felt wonderful. I felt a relief inside, both from my dpdr and just in general. It took enough off the dp and all the other craziness just enough for me to see that 70% of my dpdr is from the ptsd of those days of my moms death. 30% is due to trying to find myself, who I am and what I am doing with life and how to do it aka figuring things out.

EVERYTHING ELSE (ie schizophrenia, hallucinations, delusions, this, that, psychosis, voices, insanity etc etc) IS JUST A SIDE SHOW!! I will say it again, all my fears and worries and half ass attempts to create problems that are not there are just SIDE SHOWS to distract myself from the bottom issue.

I hope that once I have dealt with this trauma that i will be free from the intenseness of dpdr. This is a sign of hope for me. I am glad I had enough relief today that i was able to have insight to see these things. I hope all of you will find your underlying cause...

Remember, attitude is vital in recovery


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

I will keep everyone updated on my progress... I think i should of put this on the recovery forums lol


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## Jurgen (Aug 3, 2013)

You were attempting to rationalize the feeling you are experiencing, that's what everyone does. The underlying issue which precedes all of these symptoms is always extant there awaiting discovery. The person usually masks this by victimizing his/herself into believing that it's associated with something much more severe. It's absolutely true for everyone. Some people just have trouble dealing/coming to terms with what they are experiencing, so naturally they find other things to blame that could possibly resonate with what they are experiencing. A great pain deserves a complex explanation. Good job on your progress. Keep us updated.


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## AlexFromPT (Jun 26, 2011)

I have a similar story Doberg CONGRATS!!!!


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

Thanks


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## KevinSmith14 (Nov 16, 2013)

Doberg said:


> So I think I know what is wrong with me personally... I started working through the most traumatic event in my life (death of mother and finding her) This is the game plan in therapy: Talk about the experience and process the emotions and come to put it to rest.
> 
> I started today and I was able to shed a few tears, it felt wonderful. I felt a relief inside, both from my dpdr and just in general. It took enough off the dp and all the other craziness just enough for me to see that 70% of my dpdr is from the ptsd of those days of my moms death. 30% is due to trying to find myself, who I am and what I am doing with life and how to do it aka figuring things out.
> 
> ...


Good job! That's awesome! It's nice to see how much your attitude has changed since the last post we were talking in. It feels like you have a better understanding, and hope?

It's crazy how therapy exposes all of these problems that we are having. I get the same way when I go. Little things that I keep bottled up inside and ignore show their true evil whenever I talk to my counselor. I always come out thinking.. wow, I never even knew how negatively I felt about "x".


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## Doberg (Sep 12, 2013)

KevinSmith14 said:


> Good job! That's awesome! It's nice to see how much your attitude has changed since the last post we were talking in. It feels like you have a better understanding, and hope?
> 
> It's crazy how therapy exposes all of these problems that we are having. I get the same way when I go. Little things that I keep bottled up inside and ignore show their true evil whenever I talk to my counselor. I always come out thinking.. wow, I never even knew how negatively I felt about "x".


Yeah, I think there is a lot of stuff hidden deep down lol


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

Not to play favorites or anything. But I want to see you find peace bro! You deserve it.


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

Fearless said:


> We, creative, controlling types (not controlling others, but ourselves) actually believe we have those problems. It is emotional reasoning.


Heh, it's funny how much what you say resonates with me. Yet I still convince myself that there's 'something wrong'. I did this pre dp, so badly. I obviously have that tendancy, but why, I do not know. I create a loophole for myself like 'some people are just unlucky in life and get fucked up, you're one of those people'.


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