# Numbness, total loss of self, 2d not 3d . Agoraphobia, PLEASE READ and let me know. is this anything like you?



## JoshDad (Nov 3, 2010)

Had spacial syptoms since I was a kid but these hardcore depersonalization panic attacks started from a bad acid trip at age 14. Now 33. Going on 19 years and have never found anyone that understands or has ever heard of these symptoms.

1. Total loss of feeling of entire body. Specifically can't feel my feet on the ground and happens most when driving.

2. I drive 100 miles and hour and slam on the brakes. I put the AC up and then the heat up over and over frantically just to feel something. I punch things and don't feel it. I am looking for a safe zone like my house.

3. Cant go in open spaces, highways, mountains, or anything where I can't escape and can't feel my body.

4. 3d is 2d.

4. The main problem is the complete feeling of not being able to feel my body and specifically my feet on the ground. I am losing my mind and completely freaking out. I am crazy like if someone was on fire how would they react? They would panic, run, scream, stop. It really is hell.

So, I am going to finally make stopping this priorty number 1. I have little attacks multiple times everyday. Major ones about 1 time every 3 weeks. I cannot take it anymore. I have a family with a 2 year old son and a daughter on the way. I am somewhat succesful but could be a lot more if I didn't have this issue. I really need help and hopefully 1 person out there has these feelings. If you do then please let me know on this board or email me at [email protected] Let's figure this damn thing out!

Thanks for reading,
Josh


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

JoshDad said:


> Had spacial syptoms since I was a kid but these hardcore depersonalization panic attacks started from a bad acid trip at age 14. Now 33. Going on 19 years and have never found anyone that understands or has ever heard of these symptoms.
> 
> 1. Total loss of feeling of entire body. Specifically can't feel my feet on the ground and happens most when driving.
> 
> ...


Yeah man I can totally relate.. even more these last days, it has been horrible, I feel so numb emotionally and physically, can't feel anything and I don't know what to do anymore


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## TheUniversalistArtist (Jul 22, 2010)

I have all of the same symptoms and then some. The thing that bothers me most is the 2d concept, it's mainly a bitch because I've been an artist all of my life, to a degree of success even and didnt realize until last year when for the first time, I saw my own work and at times, the very world 3-dimensionally. I have had this condition my entire life, so the most I can say to explain it is the theory of it being due to prolonged and persistent stress and anxiety. I have never done hard drugs. Actually, the few times I've smoked weed in my life, I nearly woke up to actual reality, ironic, no?
I can help with your feet not feeling on the ground. I have it too, as if I'm floating above my own body. You can get rid of it, but it takes a lot of determination and discipline. You must learn "Grounding" it is a meditative technique. If you google it you will find a plethora of versions of the technique, so you can sort of shop around for the one that you think will work for you. I assure you, you can practice grounding for a good while before you start to feel any benefit, or even any point, BUT if only you stick with it and do it as often as you can. I promise it can work. One day you might not need to visualize the technique at all anymore because you will become grounded regularly. This also conquers the loss of physical sensation. I have it to. I believe I'm recovering, and that everyone here can do the same.


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## insaticiable (Feb 23, 2010)

JoshDad said:


> Had spacial syptoms since I was a kid but these hardcore depersonalization panic attacks started from a bad acid trip at age 14. Now 33. Going on 19 years and have never found anyone that understands or has ever heard of these symptoms.
> 
> 1. *Total loss of feeling of entire body*. Specifically can't feel my feet on the ground and happens most when driving.
> 
> ...


Hi Josh,

I just wanted to share my interpretation of what I gathered from your post. I bolded certain lines/phrases from points 1 and 2, because I feel like they relate with one another. In my opinion, the reason you cannot feel anything, say when you drive 100 mph and then slam on the brakes, or when you alternate between the A/C & heat, or when you punch things, precisely relates to the very loss of feeling of your entire body. It probably seems like you are not even "in'' your body...totally absent. This is primarily Depersonalization. The inability to experience 3d is primarily known as Derealization...which is another subset of Depersonalization.

From reading everything that you wrote, I believe that you would highly benefit from a form of therapy called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy which helps a lot with anxiety disorders. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT would teach you many techniques on how to control your anxiety, panic attacks, and would also give you tools for grounding as well. In addition, you mention that you can't go in open spaces, highways, mountains or anything where you can't escape or feel your body. This is agoraphobia, which you mention in your title. The treatment for agoraphobia is Exposure Therapy which branches off from CBT. Exposure Therapy would expose you to the situations which frighten you or cause you intense anxiety, make you stay with it and endure the uncomfortable feelings, and eventually desensitize you to your problematic areas. I am almost certain that you will be able to regain control of your life if you participate and partake in CBT and Exposure Therapy, as the methods and skills you gain from both of these therapies will also help you better manage and control your DP/DR as well. I hope this helped a little, and if you have any further questions, feel free to respond back to my post.

P.S: Also, if you get a chance, I think you would be interested and fascinated by watching a show called ''Obsessed'' which hits on some of the ideas I pointed out. You can find the whole first season on Netflix.


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## JoshDad (Nov 3, 2010)

Thanks to all of you 3 that read my post and replied. I can't even explain to you how much it means to me that you cared enough to respond. It actually makes me feel a bit better that I am not alone. I have stuggled for 19 years trying to find 1 person in the world that can relate to my feelings.

I have absolutely had it with these feelings. I can't do it anymore. I am going to do whatever it takes to correct this. I am going to take the advice of cognitive therapy. It might be hard to find a therapist but I am going to look today.

I would love to hear more about your personal experience. What do you specifically feel? What techniques help you through these episodes? What do you think caused you to begin having these feelings?

Thank you very much!

Josh


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## Taylor (Nov 5, 2010)

JoshDad said:


> Thanks to all of you 3 that read my post and replied. I can't even explain to you how much it means to me that you cared enough to respond. It actually makes me feel a bit better that I am not alone. I have stuggled for 19 years trying to find 1 person in the world that can relate to my feelings.
> 
> I have absolutely had it with these feelings. I can't do it anymore. I am going to do whatever it takes to correct this. I am going to take the advice of cognitive therapy. It might be hard to find a therapist but I am going to look today.
> 
> ...


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## Taylor (Nov 5, 2010)

Hi, just read your post. To be honest, I'm not even sure if what I have is DP. All I know is that it is truly hellish and is now happening to me 24/7. It's like feeling that you're just an empty shell and not really there. It's a really terrifying feeling of trying to escape your own body but you can't and blind panic sets in. I feel as I need to do something to take myself away from the overwhelming feelings, in fact, the other night I screamed and screamed to try and get away from it, I'm now frightened in case I do something like this in public, which in turn is putting me off going out. The only time I can get any respite is when I'm sleeping. I really can't bear feeling this any longer, it's taking over my whole life. I feel as my mind is 'diseased' or something. It is truly, truly terrifying. Does anyone else have these symptons?


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