# AM I GOING CRAZY



## emilybrooke77 (Dec 9, 2008)

Hi there, my name is Emily, and I am 31 years old. So far, life has treated me well, great jog, house..2 golden retrievers..the whole deal. But NOW I have been have DP for the past year1!! HORRIBLE. I look in the mirror and dont even recognize myself. As I type this I don't even know how I am. I feel like a nut job. I have islolated myself, had horrible thoughts, and REALLY want this to go away. I have been drinking alot, in the evenings to numb the scaredness of all this, but NOW i can be drunk and still feel this way. It scares the life out of me. I am really needing some support and hope from others on this site that might be able to understand where I am comming from. Heck, I don't even recognize my own voice, I try to not think about it but I cant. This happend about 3 years, ago and then went away, but now its back and back big time, causing horrible anxiety and depression. Also, another question I had, does anyone out there think this can be some kind of a spiritual imbalance? I am a Christian, but have not been active in such a long time, and wonder if that is what is going on. Also wonder if it could be alcohal withdrawl..SO scared and frusterated and really need help. I don't want to feel this way forever, and im hoping it will go away. Sorry for rambling ...but im scared. Im too young for this.

emily


----------



## Mark (Jul 21, 2008)

*NO*


----------



## emilybrooke77 (Dec 9, 2008)

Well, I still have this crazy deal!!!! Its up and down throughout the day. I was wondering if ANYONE had any advice or suggestions???

Thanks,

Emily


----------



## Mark (Jul 21, 2008)

I take a huge load of drugs so that I do not think that I am going crazy.
Maybe you could too.


----------



## mixmastermc (Dec 13, 2008)

You say that it went away for a while? At least you've got some hope that it'll go away again.

You've spent a couple of years out of 31 with DP on and off. I'm jealous. I got this shit at 14 and now i'm 24 and have never haven't been in reality for 10 years.

Sounds like you've just got to roll with it. Maybe meds will help, maybe they won't. At least you had a chance to build a decent life before dp struck you down.


----------



## recover (Aug 9, 2008)

Hey Emily, First thing congrats on finding this site, there is lot of support here and lot of information. Check out the roads to recovery posts. There are a few interesting and informative posts there.

I am 31 too, got this when I was 15, now I am almost recovered, but still hang in and out of DP. I have gone through those awful phases where you are completely disoriented and don't understand the very existence or the extreme and frightening numbness that take you down... But the good news is it is curable. To me I really feel reading many of these posts and talking to my psychologists the underlying issue is unresolved emotions and anxiety. Try to find a good therapist and start working with them. Your brain is extraordinarily powerful, work with a determination to recover yourself and you will. It is easy said than done. But believe in yourself, believe that it is in mind, believe that you are not alone and you are not crazy. There are several people here who have gone thru/going thru this and are still living a fair/happy life.

Good luck, definitely ask for a professional help.


----------



## emilybrooke77 (Dec 9, 2008)

My name is Emily. I have been suffering with DP for about 6 months straight now. I am 32 years old. Have a great career, a person who loves to live life to fullest. This has been the SCARIEST thing I have ever dealt with it!! I did suffer from chronic anxiety and I have to admit, I would rather have the anxiety back then this!! I am trying the distraction techniques and they seem to work a little, but mostly just pass the time, and then when i am quiet,. it comes right back. I wondered if others could share some other helpful hints, besides exercise and distracting activities. Like what do you when it comes on so strong., I find mine is at its worst in the morning!!!

Thanks,
Emily


----------



## lfbenz (May 23, 2009)

I joined 3 bands and practiced almost everyday, that...pretty much killed it, until i didnt sleep today lol. The scary thoughts do pass though. GET GOOD SLEEP!!!! This shit is horrible when your tired!


----------



## emilybrooke77 (Dec 9, 2008)

WOW ISN'T THAT THE TRUTH!!! I find that if i drink the night before its WAY worse the next too!


----------



## Garjon (Apr 4, 2009)

oh god yes. dp hangovers are by far the worst thing in the world. You feel like your soul is being sucked out of your body. I wanted to also tell you that i too drink to get over this..i drink pretty heavily..so i thought maybe that was the issue with me but i quit drinking for just shy of a month with no noticeable change. I am, however, now wondering if the smoking has something to do with it. I smoke half a pack to a pack and a half every day depending on the day.


----------

