# I'm so tired from all of this/demotivated



## Gfeathers (Nov 17, 2013)

Hi.

I feel so tired from years and years of dp and other problems, and the associated stress, that i feel like i want to go to sleep for a really long time, curl into a ball almost and give up 'trying' to function for a while and just have lots of peace and quiet. Im tired from it all and bored from the trying of it all too. fed up. God knows what the future holds. Whatever i try and make it, i know. I just had a bad dp'd, and therefore stressed week last week and its affected my confidence, is all, i guess and my mind wants some peace now. Lets hope i actually sleep and get that then, eh. I wont really stay in bed tomorrow of course, god knows where that's lead me - somewhere much worse, is where. I shall get up and get back on the fking tread mill and try and get on with things.

Peace.


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## Guest (Feb 21, 2014)

Just do your best to stop reacting your feelings and focus on your life instead!


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## rodenhiser (Jan 24, 2013)

I'm sorry you're so down. The worst thing you can possibly do is stay down on yourself because of it though. We all have our moments; but throughout it all, I always keep my head on the bright side, even if it seems so vague and distant.

All you can do is keep trying. Keep pushing yourself, and striving for the best. Never look towards recovery. Just look for peace of mind. Keeping yourself in tune with all that goes on around you. Day by day, do something to keep your mind active; whether it's reading a book, or doing the daily crossword in the newspaper. Always have something in the day to keep yourself grounded. The key is never to dwell.


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## Gfeathers (Nov 17, 2013)

Hi.

Thankyou people for your replies. You're right in keeping your brain active and generally occupied, i know. I haven't been doing tha so much lately. I have lost (years ago actually, but especially recently), direction in my life and surity or notions of what to 'do' with myself to occupy my time and be around other people and my dp has been so bad just recently, i did/have obsessed about it, i get terribly dissociated at times though feeling like i'm not me, and can barely get dressed as i dont know who i am and sometimes when i do i get imense panic that i am not me, like i have someone elses clothes on, dr feelings about my body/perwonal self, its very disorientating/panic inducing and very hard to distract or feel at peace with oneself during it. I've started waring the exact same clothes all the time to make things easier for myself. I haven't had a 'life' as such for years leaving lots of opportunity to get very self involved and now feel to obtain a life feels almost impossible (i'm a bit down a the minute). I 'was' anorexic for about 25 years after some major trauma, where i completely left the building that was me, leaving myself basically abandoned by myself and without a driver/myself, but what i was trying to control was time as i felt too mentally screwed/nervous wreak to do anything, leaving me basically a quite undeveloped as a person and unable to grow much. I do eat, etc and am not tiny thin or anything these days, but its like i'm scared of being hungrey or swomething and still want to control when i eat, as i've no real hunger barometer due to anxiety, but for years i've lived with leaving at least 5-6 hours between meals. This makes me hugely inflexable in terms of going out in the day, meeting up with people and going with the flow. Its seriously impeding my life and progress. Im hoping that when i've managed to obtain more of a routine (feel so lost), that i will feel more secure and more able to be with pwople and go with the flow. Maybe living in London doesn't help - i read something someone had written on forum about in order to recover from ptsd you need to feel safe. Quite right. I might also eventually look into moving somewhere a bit more rural and nearer countryside and nature which i find more relaxing and peaceful.

Major waffle going on there, tired is my excuse. Peace to all and i'll take your coments on board, and give myself a necessary kick up the rear to more back on track. Thanks.


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