# Strangely Recovered.



## AMANDA-T (Oct 9, 2014)

Hi guys, im going to keep it short because I am at work, but I got my DP from 4 days of drinking (was on vacation & living it up ((or so I thought)), then it hit me). I woke up one morning and was itching my leg, when all of a sudden I got the strangest/scariest sensation I have EVER felt in my life. I felt like I couldn't feel my arm itching my leg. Then of course, that triggered a huge anxiety/panic attack (which I know how to control as I had dealt with anxiety for 4 months a few years back and learned how to control it). From that day on, I kept obsessing over that strange feeling, and the fact that I felt so distant from myself. I woke up every morning nervous, and went to bed every night nervous which is so bad for you. I went for I would say 2 months like this before realizing that .. "Hey im not dead yet, so this must not be AS BAD as im making it". I didn't quit my job (even though I wanted to so bad). I didn't have relationship problems, but thank God I had my boyfriend by my side every step of the way supporting me, because that helped me so much. It was hard to look at my parents, my sisters.. Everything was just so weird. I kept pushing through it and trying to stay positive, even though I was getting so depressed over it. I thought to myself sometimes "What if I get suicidal in the future cause im so unhappy that this is me now?" .... then I put all that sh*t to a stop and took everyones advice just to suck it up and LOVE IT!! So .... one day the physical feelings wore off. Then I found myself stuck in a month of wondering WHY I live... why I talk... why I breathe.... etc....I felt like I didn't know who I was.. and was going to lose my identity which was the scariest hump to get over now that I look back at it. But then... as you put more and more positivity in your life.. and try and have fun... you start having what I call "breakthrough" moments... where you feel like yourself. Every day I had more and more breakthrough moments.... until you just stop thinking about it.... then you realize wow. I was doing it to myself. I was thinking so deep... you know what. Just be happy you aren't dying of something. Thats what I kept telling myself every night before bed and those positive thoughts went into my subconscious mind..... and cured me. Then I realized that I had been cured... . for a month. it went away, and I was just over-analyzing literally everything I looked at. You just need to pray.. and be happy... and just accept it and live with it. I pulled through so can you!!! Don't let any doctor or psychologist tell you you cant. Millions of people have.... and it was easier then they though. And they definitely weren't on here writing about it.. .and googleing it all day and night.. Everyday I wake up with a smile. You can too I promise.

some posts that helped me MAJOR:

http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/37596-the-only-cure-is-additude-im-100-cured/

http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/user/41205-optimist/?tab=topics

ADDING IN AN EDITED more DETAILED version of my recovery from this funny disorder! 

My DP Story


Started while on vacation from work for 10 days à drinking almost every night on vaca
After the 4th day, woke up feeling very weird. Was itching my leg and didn't feel like it was ME itching it
Had a panic attack
Barely slept
Feelings faded away & I went on with my day
Next morning I woke up feeling better.. still kind of weird àfreaked me out again. Had another panic attack
Literally obsessed over this feeling for a week so bad&#8230; anxiety out the roof until my body felt so unreal that I thought I was dying of some unknown cancer.
Googled the way I felt. (Retarded)
Found depersonalization. Bingo!!
OBSESSED OVER IT FOR WEEKS AND WEEKS while working and feeling like a robot.
Read to just enjoy those symptoms and they will fade away. 
It was true. I worked and just felt high à enjoyed it (was very interesting)
Literally in a few days those feelings disappeared and BAM! I was in reality (scared and shocked the hell out of me because I felt fake for over a month!)
Started to analyze everything (had that wave of DP where all the existential thoughts came.. examples:

What is a leg
Why do I walk
What if we didn't breathe
What are eyes
Why do I see
What are parents
Why do we have parents
What is a car
Who am I
WHY DO I FORGET WHO I AM
How come I don't feel like I know myself
FEARED losing control of my body/mind à fully.

I literally laugh my ass off every time I think of these questions that came to my head haha.


Quickly realized that this was fucking retarded and moved on &#8230;&#8230;.
Kept googling shit day and night about how I can recover from this. Never found a solution. Literally gave up on this depersonalization thing and said fuck it. I don't even care about anything anymore. Im going to enjoy my life with DP. 
Within an hour felt AMAZING. Got this boost of confidence from who knows where.
Started having epiphanies&#8230;.. à this is all in my head&#8230; why can I not feel DP when im busy? Or not thinking about it??
Woke up from the dream I put myself in for months. 
Started living day to day and feeling more of myself come back to me&#8230; slowly (AND I MEAN SLOWLY) but surely!! J
Kept having my "Breakthrough" moments and got so much hope from those!! 
Enjoyed things&#8230; movies&#8230; my boyfriend&#8230; my family etc.

Listen to everybody else when they say just enjoy it and move on (and it WILL fade away okay)

Nobody lives with this forever and if they do then they are so unfortunate and I have no idea HOW they can when fixing it is so simple&#8230; but takes so much time!! That's the reason why people don't recover. Is because they want it so fast! (WRONG PPL). Enjoy what you have been given. A life. Who cares if a few months out of the year feels like your fucked up on the worst drug ever. I promise you this experience is a gift.. and it makes you appreciate what you have so much more. You will recover. Get off this site though. This is my LAST post ill ever make. J xoxo good luck everyone!


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## ThisCreatedAccount (Jul 29, 2014)

Hi there, how did you find a way to get rid off those deep thoughts? Cause right now those are driving me crazy! I think I'm going to loose my mind and not know who I am. I question everything to my existence to how I function. These thoughts just keep coming back. Please five me an advice  I need to stop thinking so much and stop looking at the far future and look at the present


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## ThisCreatedAccount (Jul 29, 2014)

[Post deleted]


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## AMANDA-T (Oct 9, 2014)

They just pass... I talked to this hypnotist and therapist man named Rick Saruna and hearing him say "I made several people come out of that within weeks of treatment with me" literally stopped all of those thoughts I was creating in my own head. It was amazing how powerful my mind was acting at the time.


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## planet (Feb 5, 2014)

Dp because of drinking WTF    
Too bad ...


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## AMANDA-T (Oct 9, 2014)

I know eh!! It wasn't just one day of drinking lol. It was like 4 FULL DAYS of binge drinking!!


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## M_anna84 (Dec 3, 2014)

Did u ever get the feeling like you were falling in a hole? When I lay down I can't feel things under me and I feel like I'm falling and I can't get out. I'm just wondering if this is a common symptom


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## newbie101 (Nov 13, 2014)

Yes very common that took me like a month to pass.. but it does go away


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## M_anna84 (Dec 3, 2014)

Alright thank you, I've had the depersonalization for about a week or so now but I've been dealing with panic disorder constant for 2 months. I've had the depersonalization on and off but never this severe. My body feels numb all the time and I always feel like I'm not in my body it is the scariest feeling, did u go through the same thing as well?


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## newbie101 (Nov 13, 2014)

Yea. Honestly that's like the worst part to get through. Once that is gone it's pretty much a matter of getting it off your mind. Not fearing it is number ONE in recovery.


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## M_anna84 (Dec 3, 2014)

Okay I try to not get scared and just let it go but the feelings get so intense and when it gets really bad I feel like I'm dying or I'm in between life and death so I can't help but get scared when I get that feeling


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## newbie101 (Nov 13, 2014)

Of course. It takes a bit of practice but you will get there. Everyone does despite what you hear on here.


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## M_anna84 (Dec 3, 2014)

I appreciate your help  it makes it a little easier knowing I'm not the only one who's going through it.


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## AMANDA-T (Oct 9, 2014)

Hello everyone. Just stopping in to let you all know that life is going good 

Also, just wanted to let you know thaat the cause of my DP was not in fact drinking, it was anxiety all along.

I recently got hit with some anxiety out of nowhere, and you can guess what immediately came back --> me feeling spaced out.

Then i got nervous that I was starting all the way over to where i was before i forgot about dp.

It sucked really bad for the first month/2, but i just kept myself really busy. \im getting back to my life again, and symptoms are rapidly fading.

You need to stop going on the forum guys, i promise you, get back to your life.

hang out with family or friends as much as you can, as this will eventually make you feel like you did before.

Anyway, thats all i have to say, im out.


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