# Cured for 2+ years



## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Hey all,

Just wanted to drop by and give a little reassurance. I had terrible DP/DR, was a frequent visitor here 2 years ago, and posted about my experience once. I am now about 2 years from being fully recovered. I never, ever thought I would get my life back but I did and I want you to know that you can rid yourself of this shit. If you have any questions, I'd be glad to answer them. Peace and love


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## roadt2recovery (Aug 27, 2013)

drews0322 said:


> Hey all,
> 
> Just wanted to drop by and give a little reassurance. I had terrible DP/DR, was a frequent visitor here 2 years ago, and posted about my experience once. I am now about 2 years from being fully recovered. I never, ever thought I would get my life back but I did and I want you to know that you can rid yourself of this shit. If you have any questions, I'd be glad to answer them. Peace and love


I got a lot to ask but instead I'd should just ask in 3 main questions, get back to me please, thanks.

1. How did recovery happen? Was it gradual or did you snap back?

2. Did you have to work on issues outside DP like co-dependancy/isolation/unresolved issues, or did you just work on the DP issues to recovery?

3. What differences did you notice between having DP and life without DP now? Like for example, did you 100% realise you're back or did you doubt it?


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## Hosscat (Oct 23, 2012)

Did you have any existential fears? (about nothing being real)


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

roadt2recovery said:


> I got a lot to ask but instead I'd should just ask in 3 main questions, get back to me please, thanks.
> 
> 1. How did recovery happen? Was it gradual or did you snap back?
> 
> ...


1) Recovery was gradual. I first noticed on a weekend trip to Tahoe that there were brief periods where the world "looked normal" and I didn't feel completely DP'ed. Those initial glimpses back into the real world gave me hope that one day I could fully re-enter. Then, about a month after that I went to Dallas on another trip for leisure and it went away completely. I think the change of scenery definitely helped me.

2) I had countless issues man, and I still do and I'm working through them. I got the DP/DR through smoking weed, which gave me a bad mushroom flashback. But, what was going on in my life at the time was really what set it off when looking back on it. My little sister died in her sleep and they never found out why, my mom admitted to me she was a drug addict my whole life and she upped and left for rehab for 3 months, and I had dropped out of college. Compound those with my already troubled upbringing and I was bound to be fucked up in some way. After my DP set in, I got panic attacks multiple times a day for a couple months. It was debilitating. I tried meds and shrinks, but what helped best was just a talk therapist who I could trust.

3) There's no real difference in the way that I live my life, but in terms of the way life feels, it's a bit different. I don't feel like I did before I got the DP/DR, but it's not a bad thing. I think any time someone goes through a traumatizing experience, even after you recover you never feel the same. It's not like it lingers or anything, in fact it has made me stronger and I enjoy life now more than I ever did before DP. It made me a stronger person for sure. I'm not sure I get DP anymore but every now and then I get the DR (usually when hungover) but it doesn't bother me because I know it will go away.

PS-Don't be afraid to ask more


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Hosscat said:


> Did you have any existential fears? (about nothing being real)


Bigtime. It's hard to even place myself in the mindset I was in back when I had DP/DR. But since I had a really bad mushroom trip that kind of warped my sense of reality to begin with, my mind being able to pull on that experience was not good for me at all. I felt like my life had ended and I was in limbo.


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## Jonngliniak (Jun 11, 2013)

Ar you still interested in your hobbies an other stuff like that. And di you have obssessive thoughts bout everything


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Jonngliniak said:


> Ar you still interested in your hobbies an other stuff like that. And di you have obssessive thoughts bout everything


Still super interested in my hobbies. In fact, after I had my experience with DP, I started my music career and have since released a mixtape and played a bunch of shows. I write about my experiences a lot in my lyrics and its incredibly therapeutic.

I still struggle with obsessive thoughts. My mind can attach itself to an idea and then just run with it, but I have learned to control it better than when I was struggling with DP and DR.


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## meow (Nov 2, 2013)

Were there any steps you took to come out of it? Diet, exercise, therapy? Did you have to control your thoughts and anxiety before you could recover? Did you have to stop thinking about it before it went away?


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## heartless (Apr 29, 2013)

peace n love 2 u 2


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

What was it like when you recovered? Was it kindve subtle and you just forgot about it or was it this big moment of joy and relief since you were finally out.


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

meow said:


> Were there any steps you took to come out of it? Diet, exercise, therapy? Did you have to control your thoughts and anxiety before you could recover? Did you have to stop thinking about it before it went away?


I tried to make my life as routine as possible. At the time of my DP, I was really underweight so my main focus was on eating 3 square meals a day plus a protein smoothie that I'd make. I also tried to regulate my sleep schedule since that had been nightmarish my whole life. My thoughts were definitely my biggest enemy, I'd wake up every morning and the first thing I'd do was check if I still had DR. So I stopped doing that through crating new habits; instead of waking up and looking out the window to see if the world looked dreamlike, I'd wake up and head straight into the kitchen to make a big breakfast.

I definitely had to stop thinking of it before it went away. Distraction was great for me. I would find myself having moments of happiness and then the thought of DP or DR would pop into my head and then it'd be like "oh fuck..." But the more I neutralized those thoughts and started focusing on other things, the more it all began to fade. It's not like it necessarily went away on it's own. I had to make a conscious effort to change the way I was thinking.



Bamartinez4582 said:


> What was it like when you recovered? Was it kindve subtle and you just forgot about it or was it this big moment of joy and relief since you were finally out.


There are no words to describe how good it felt. The biggest moment of relief came when I got my first glimpse back into the real world and felt like myself again, even if it was for a brief moment. That reassured me that I could get back for good, it would just take time.


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

Did you have any trauma that you needed to resolve? And what about existential problems? Did you have any?


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Bamartinez4582 said:


> Did you have any trauma that you needed to resolve? And what about existential problems? Did you have any?


I had some pretty massive traumas going back all the way to when I was a toddler up to right before I DPed. The biggest one was probably my little sister's death.

As for existential problems, I had a host of them, and I'm still working through them. A lot of new ones were raised or at least brought to the forefront after my sister's death. She was only 11 years old and died in her sleep and they couldn't find out why and that really messed with my head.


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

This has really been helpful as well as hopeful. The last question is what were the physical changes? If any.


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Physical changes in what way?


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

Some people feel like they get re integrated to ther body in a way. One case that I saw the girl was touch sensitive and simple things like running her hands along rocks felt very sensual to her compared to before where it didn't have a feeling.


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Bamartinez4582 said:


> Some people feel like they get re integrated to ther body in a way. One case that I saw the girl was touch sensitive and simple things like running her hands along rocks felt very sensual to her compared to before where it didn't have a feeling.


I had a lot of strange tingling in my head during my DP that ended up going away. I also got a bunch of floaters and visual snow during that time as well, but I have gotten so used to them that I barely notice them anymore.


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

http://inspirepub.hubpages.com/hub/Finding-Ones-Self---Recovery-From-Dissociation

That's the story^^^ she felt like moved back to her body so idk if everyone gets that or what.

But congratulations man. This really brings hope to me and makes me look forward to the future.


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## Pmz623 (Sep 15, 2013)

drews0322 said:


> Still super interested in my hobbies. In fact, after I had my experience with DP, I started my music career and have since released a mixtape and played a bunch of shows. I write about my experiences a lot in my lyrics and its incredibly therapeutic.
> 
> I still struggle with obsessive thoughts. My mind can attach itself to an idea and then just run with it, but I have learned to control it better than when I was struggling with DP and DR.


did you find it hard to relate/enjoy music during DP?


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Pmz623 said:


> did you find it hard to relate/enjoy music during DP?


To be honest not particularly. It was strange, at times, to listen to stuff that I enjoyed before DP, but I also fell in love with new artists at that time. I also forced myself to write and record my own stuff. In a way, I felt like music was all I had. So much of what I write today has to do with my experiences with DP/DR, as well as trauma and depression.


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## Pmz623 (Sep 15, 2013)

Its frustrating because I feel like I cant connect with music the same way anymore. Songs would get me so amped up, now not so much anymore. It just doesnt get me excited. I dont have that rhythm I felt like I used to.


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## Pmz623 (Sep 15, 2013)

do you drink at all? if so, do you think that helps?


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

Pmz623 said:


> do you drink at all? if so, do you think that helps?


I drink but not too often. I don't think it helps really. If I really go hard one night and I have a terrible hangover the next day, I feel some DR so I don't really get drunk like I did my freshman year of college.


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## meow (Nov 2, 2013)

drews0322 said:


> It's not like it necessarily went away on it's own. I had to make a conscious effort to change the way I was thinking.


What kind of thoughts were you changing? Just not thinking about the dp/dr? How did you do that?


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## Spadde (Oct 29, 2013)

Did you have ruminating thoughts about existence and why we are alive etc?


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## drews0322 (Aug 24, 2011)

meow said:


> What kind of thoughts were you changing? Just not thinking about the dp/dr? How did you do that?


I had to stop my obsession with the DP/DR. I had OCD before DP so it was really hard for me to break those thought habits. I just tried to obsess over things that were productive like my own music, school, and even following sports. Sometimes that side of me still manifests itself in bad ways like needing to collect things (video games and books), and obsessing over my appearance. Basically, I just tried to get as busy as possible to not allow myself to have the time to ruminate. It got much easier as time went on. I understand that's not the case for everyone, but that's how it was for me.



Spadde said:


> Did you have ruminating thoughts about existence and why we are alive etc?


Yep, I pretty much obsessed over everything. I still have those thoughts, but they don't phase me as much anymore.


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## Spadde (Oct 29, 2013)

Thank you for doing this, hope is the best medecine when having Dp/Dr


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