# How do you resolve trauma?



## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

I know my issues. Alcoholic dad who used to prefer drinking to paying attention a brother that made my life a living hell to the point where I wanted to kill myself a mom who ignores issues and medicated me a fucked up family system and I was bullied a bit. How do I GET OVER these things though?


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

I don't know how to though is the problem. I can be angry and I have been (in the dp way) for a long time and I would always have a chip on my shoulder about things. Is it just that everything is so deeply repressed that I can't access it?


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## seafoamwaves (Sep 20, 2013)

Technically couldn't a panic attack be described as repressed emotions?



Sike25 said:


> I don't know how to though is the problem. I can be angry and I have been (in the dp way) for a long time and I would always have a chip on my shoulder about things. Is it just that everything is so deeply repressed that I can't access it?


I think they are our panic attacks. Any time we panic it's because we're feeling our past pain.


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## Sike25 (Apr 30, 2012)

If panick attacks made me recover I would've recovered 6 months into this. I've been dpd for 2.5 years


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## fr2nky23 (Aug 29, 2013)

But how to get to that point that you can go emotionally back to that time when that trauma was? I am emotionally so numb that i can not feel any emotions at all. So first i must get to the point when im going to emotionally feel that trauma again and then i can let it out. And that letting out is crying it out or how to do that? Just being very scared and living it trougth emotionally or what?


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## Guest (Dec 8, 2013)

fr2nky23 said:


> But how to get to that point that you can go emotionally back to that time when that trauma was? I am emotionally so numb that i can not feel any emotions at all. So first i must get to the point when im going to emotionally feel that trauma again and then i can let it out. And that letting out is crying it out or how to do that? Just being very scared and living it trougth emotionally or what?


You've got to understand dissociation and what it's doing. It's protecting you from something. If your mind has chosen to use it's dissociative powers to protect you, there must be for a reason. One of the reasons will be, in some way, you don't feel safe. Maybe it's b/c a memory has being triggered? Or maybe there's someone in your life who is physically close to you, who hurt you or threatened to hurt you in the past? i.e. abusive parent?

One way therapists work is to set up a safe environment for their clients This is a very important step that they may or may nor talk about, but believe me it's high on their agenda. The reason why they do this is b/c once someone feels safe, both physically and mentally their defences will come down.. i.e., someone with dp/dr will have no need to dissociate in this space. When you stop dissociating, you'll have better access to memories and emotions. They'll just happen on their own accord. You can achieve this at home as well, but only if you really ARE in a safe space. It all takes time though. .. it's not gonna happen overnight or in a few sessions with a therapist, it can take a year or more to get started.

A trauma therapist I worked with for a year told me about the theory of 'time and distance' for remembering traumatic events. The way that works is, you need to have a certain amount of time and distance away from a perpetrator of abuse before the memories are safe to come out. Don't ask me why, it just works like that.


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## seafoamwaves (Sep 20, 2013)

Fearless said:


> Not exactly. Panic is when your body wants to release past pain, and you interpret it as danger.


Oh.... wait how the heck do you NOT interpret as danger? lol I mean, I've sort of been changing my attitude that it's not supposed to be easy


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## fr2nky23 (Aug 29, 2013)

Philo, yes i understand dissociation and why i am in this state. I had 2 traumas in my life and after last one i got depressed and after that i had high anxiety. So I was scared of everything and after that i got depersonaliazed. It is not because of parents or early childhood trauma. Traumas happened 1-2 years ago.

1 week ago i was going to feel like normal again but then i was going to be scared and depressed of everything again and i did not know how to let the pain out and boom got that dissocation mode again and today when i woke up im depersonalized again.

So i have no idea how to get to that point again that i am going to feel normal again? Maybe i should accept my depersonalization feelings and then im going to feel more safe and then i can let the pain out?


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## fr2nky23 (Aug 29, 2013)

And now i feel even more disconnected from my body and more emotionally numb than before failed attempt to resolve that trauma :S
i just have so weird feeling like i dont have body :S:S


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## fr2nky23 (Aug 29, 2013)

At this point i do not know how to act. Should i accept that condition or should i try to find a way out


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