# Think About Yourself All You Want To



## Guest (Sep 6, 2004)

but here's the trick.

I just realized that when I talk about "Focus Outward" all the time, it sounds like I never think about ME. Oh, contraire, grin.

It's FINE to think about yourself (and if you're like me, you find you fascinating). Think about memories, think about things you did and said and liked or disliked, and maybe what you WISH you'd said, lol....

Think about what you want to do. Think about the far future, goals, etc. and picture yourself doing it. Think about the near future and anticipate cool things you might plan for yourself, people to see, movies to see, CD's to play, etc.

But....do not think about yourself IN THE MOMENT.

What aggravates the dp cycle is not thoughts of self, but WATCHING self in the moment by moment of living and thinking.

Don't watch your own hands with fascination as they type. Don't "tune in" to your own body and "ask" yourself if you are feeling good, bad, better, worse, etc. than you did before you started typing.

Don't THINK about what you're thinking right now. Don't listen to yourself breathe. Don't pause and "feel for" your own heartbeat. Don't "ask yourself" if you feel hot or cold or tired or excited.

Don't replay your thoughts from instant to instant to analyze if they seem "sane." Don't Edit your thoughts while you're thinking them. If you're able to realize "this is me thinking" you're not interested enough in the MATERIAL you're thinking about.

Don't picture yourself from a camera's viewpoint across the room. Don't try to imagine how you look at this exact instant to any imaginary observer.

Don't blink and then ask yourself if your eyes feel funny.
Don't blink again before you really NEED to as a way of "testing" whether your eyes are indeed feeling funny.

Do not amuse yourself (or torture yourself) with the current moment by moment functioning of your own brain and body.

That's what I mean by focus outward.

Peace,
Janine (who is now totally aware of her own fingers on the keyboard, lol)


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## Guest (Sep 6, 2004)

but here's the trick.

I just realized that when I talk about "Focus Outward" all the time, it sounds like I never think about ME. Oh, contraire, grin.

It's FINE to think about yourself (and if you're like me, you find you fascinating). Think about memories, think about things you did and said and liked or disliked, and maybe what you WISH you'd said, lol....

Think about what you want to do. Think about the far future, goals, etc. and picture yourself doing it. Think about the near future and anticipate cool things you might plan for yourself, people to see, movies to see, CD's to play, etc.

But....do not think about yourself IN THE MOMENT.

What aggravates the dp cycle is not thoughts of self, but WATCHING self in the moment by moment of living and thinking.

Don't watch your own hands with fascination as they type. Don't "tune in" to your own body and "ask" yourself if you are feeling good, bad, better, worse, etc. than you did before you started typing.

Don't THINK about what you're thinking right now. Don't listen to yourself breathe. Don't pause and "feel for" your own heartbeat. Don't "ask yourself" if you feel hot or cold or tired or excited.

Don't replay your thoughts from instant to instant to analyze if they seem "sane." Don't Edit your thoughts while you're thinking them. If you're able to realize "this is me thinking" you're not interested enough in the MATERIAL you're thinking about.

Don't picture yourself from a camera's viewpoint across the room. Don't try to imagine how you look at this exact instant to any imaginary observer.

Don't blink and then ask yourself if your eyes feel funny.
Don't blink again before you really NEED to as a way of "testing" whether your eyes are indeed feeling funny.

Do not amuse yourself (or torture yourself) with the current moment by moment functioning of your own brain and body.

That's what I mean by focus outward.

Peace,
Janine (who is now totally aware of her own fingers on the keyboard, lol)


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

this 'thinking about me' sounds really selfish to an outside observer,but its because we feel so weird and trapped that it is just 'there' all of the time.....
when will this son of a bitch thing ever end,im losing faith


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

this 'thinking about me' sounds really selfish to an outside observer,but its because we feel so weird and trapped that it is just 'there' all of the time.....
when will this son of a bitch thing ever end,im losing faith


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## JasonFar (Aug 13, 2004)

JC,

You're ill. Your body is a mess. Your chemicals aren't working correctly. What I've noticed in my journey to health is that, though self-obsession is deemed a "selfish" act, it generally isn't one put forth by yourSelf, Soul, Mind, whatever, alone. When one's self-obsession is so deep and entrenched as those of us with DP, or huge depressive tendencies, I don't think it's a Selfish act at all... It's just an abnormal act caused by ill health. I think we all have psychological issues that revolve around inadequacy and therefore our defences going into place (placing such a large emphasis on yourself), but we aren't self-obsessed in the extreme sense that I think some pathalogies consist of.

Anyway, my point is, don't beat yourself up for being "selfish". It's hogwash.


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## JasonFar (Aug 13, 2004)

JC,

You're ill. Your body is a mess. Your chemicals aren't working correctly. What I've noticed in my journey to health is that, though self-obsession is deemed a "selfish" act, it generally isn't one put forth by yourSelf, Soul, Mind, whatever, alone. When one's self-obsession is so deep and entrenched as those of us with DP, or huge depressive tendencies, I don't think it's a Selfish act at all... It's just an abnormal act caused by ill health. I think we all have psychological issues that revolve around inadequacy and therefore our defences going into place (placing such a large emphasis on yourself), but we aren't self-obsessed in the extreme sense that I think some pathalogies consist of.

Anyway, my point is, don't beat yourself up for being "selfish". It's hogwash.


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## enngirl5 (Aug 10, 2004)

"It's FINE to think about yourself (and if you're like me, you find you fascinating)"

lol, you're awesome Janine. :wink:


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## enngirl5 (Aug 10, 2004)

"It's FINE to think about yourself (and if you're like me, you find you fascinating)"

lol, you're awesome Janine. :wink:


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

but why do i think about 'me' all of the time(mentally not physically),i really am trapped in my thoughts 24/7 and it just puts a barrier between me and the outside world.....ive been banging on about this for four years and it still disturbs me...im unhappy,im misserable,im tired,i cant think straight,i cant think outside of this bubble,im unable to drift off into a daydream as my fear of my thoughts leaving me scares the crap out of me,so im just stuck in this tormenting soul destroying punishment......im not really any worse than i was im just tired of this shit,all i want is mental freedom again,freedom to just do stuff without thinking about it and worrying,freedom to be spontanious,freedom from my nagging stupid thoughts,freedom to get on a plane and sit on the beach without a care in the world,freedom to work again without fear of running home in a panic....im just angry & pissed off,why should i also spend all day momentarilly watching my breathing ? what the fuck is happening to me,whats happening to this mind of mine,even paronoia is setting in now,i even think that everyone on this board thinks im nuts and have lost the plot !!!


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

but why do i think about 'me' all of the time(mentally not physically),i really am trapped in my thoughts 24/7 and it just puts a barrier between me and the outside world.....ive been banging on about this for four years and it still disturbs me...im unhappy,im misserable,im tired,i cant think straight,i cant think outside of this bubble,im unable to drift off into a daydream as my fear of my thoughts leaving me scares the crap out of me,so im just stuck in this tormenting soul destroying punishment......im not really any worse than i was im just tired of this shit,all i want is mental freedom again,freedom to just do stuff without thinking about it and worrying,freedom to be spontanious,freedom from my nagging stupid thoughts,freedom to get on a plane and sit on the beach without a care in the world,freedom to work again without fear of running home in a panic....im just angry & pissed off,why should i also spend all day momentarilly watching my breathing ? what the fuck is happening to me,whats happening to this mind of mine,even paronoia is setting in now,i even think that everyone on this board thinks im nuts and have lost the plot !!!


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

that must be the answer ive lost the plot


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

that must be the answer ive lost the plot


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

jc, you've haven't lost the plot dude! And don't let this thing convince you otherwise. 
Cold in Berkshire this morning huh?


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

jc, you've haven't lost the plot dude! And don't let this thing convince you otherwise. 
Cold in Berkshire this morning huh?


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

cheers g-funk....ive noticed a strange shift recently which is why i seem to be ranting late at night...before, the mornings were the worst time for me now its switched to the evenings...but ive noticed that not many others have agreed with you in telling me i havnt lost the plot so i guess i will take that as a yes...
yeh its pretty chilly here this morning but i welcome it with open arms,the summer can last way too long for me because no matter what i do im always baking hot


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

cheers g-funk....ive noticed a strange shift recently which is why i seem to be ranting late at night...before, the mornings were the worst time for me now its switched to the evenings...but ive noticed that not many others have agreed with you in telling me i havnt lost the plot so i guess i will take that as a yes...
yeh its pretty chilly here this morning but i welcome it with open arms,the summer can last way too long for me because no matter what i do im always baking hot


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

I'm sure that everybody agrees that you have not lost the plot. I'm also sure that everybody would agree that at some point they've also declared the exact same thing. I know I have. How long have you had dp if you don't mind me asking?


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

I'm sure that everybody agrees that you have not lost the plot. I'm also sure that everybody would agree that at some point they've also declared the exact same thing. I know I have. How long have you had dp if you don't mind me asking?


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

first time 91 - 93 this time 2000 until the present.....


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

first time 91 - 93 this time 2000 until the present.....


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

how did you get rid of it the first time?


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

how did you get rid of it the first time?


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## DM (Aug 12, 2004)

Janine thnx - totally correct. Did the same. Could not have said it better - once you do this AND as a add on dare to feel and act (so leaving the tendency to observe and analyze every move you make) - DP/DR will fade (in my case sudden impacts of clarity which got longer and longer). Even now I remember the first moments it was gone for a couple of minutes and I could smell and enjoy the environment...


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## DM (Aug 12, 2004)

Janine thnx - totally correct. Did the same. Could not have said it better - once you do this AND as a add on dare to feel and act (so leaving the tendency to observe and analyze every move you make) - DP/DR will fade (in my case sudden impacts of clarity which got longer and longer). Even now I remember the first moments it was gone for a couple of minutes and I could smell and enjoy the environment...


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

g-funk said:


> how did you get rid of it the first time?


its a bit of a blur but i spent a year mostly in my room,i had lots of friends around me then, so we used to go out and i had loads of moral support,then i took on a driving job and over the space of a year my attention on me just faded


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

g-funk said:


> how did you get rid of it the first time?


its a bit of a blur but i spent a year mostly in my room,i had lots of friends around me then, so we used to go out and i had loads of moral support,then i took on a driving job and over the space of a year my attention on me just faded


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

I really need to spend less time on this forum. Working from home is just an excuse to surf the net/bid on ebay/email mates all day long.

Anyway jc, I know that when people suggest stuff to do, its like, even brushing your teeth is a phenomenal task. I don't know your history but could you not work from home perhaps, or get another driving job? Or any dynamic structure to your day that gives you something to strive for. I quit work for two weeks thinking that if I gave up any responsibilities or activities then I didn't have to worry about them, and I could concentrate on getting better. All I did was concentrate on myself and my self esteem went sub zero. I spent days doing nothing except living in my own head.

I found that if you at least accomplish some things you think you couldn't do, even if you feel sh*t at the time, you will have more respect for yourself and feel as though you have achieved something. Makes you more positive.


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

I really need to spend less time on this forum. Working from home is just an excuse to surf the net/bid on ebay/email mates all day long.

Anyway jc, I know that when people suggest stuff to do, its like, even brushing your teeth is a phenomenal task. I don't know your history but could you not work from home perhaps, or get another driving job? Or any dynamic structure to your day that gives you something to strive for. I quit work for two weeks thinking that if I gave up any responsibilities or activities then I didn't have to worry about them, and I could concentrate on getting better. All I did was concentrate on myself and my self esteem went sub zero. I spent days doing nothing except living in my own head.

I found that if you at least accomplish some things you think you couldn't do, even if you feel sh*t at the time, you will have more respect for yourself and feel as though you have achieved something. Makes you more positive.


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

oh sure
my days are much more structured,but im just highly frustrated at the moment having no money...but my psycotherepy starts soon and i was told to leave myself free for the sessions...but working from home would be nice ...but doing what ???
you are correct though having structure is very important


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

oh sure
my days are much more structured,but im just highly frustrated at the moment having no money...but my psycotherepy starts soon and i was told to leave myself free for the sessions...but working from home would be nice ...but doing what ???
you are correct though having structure is very important


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## Guest (Sep 8, 2004)

i don't imagine myself watching myself, i don't feel like im seperate from my body, i just feel Weird all of the time, like spaced out, foggy. Its just an aura of strangeness.


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## Guest (Sep 8, 2004)

i don't imagine myself watching myself, i don't feel like im seperate from my body, i just feel Weird all of the time, like spaced out, foggy. Its just an aura of strangeness.


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## Guest (Sep 8, 2004)

Well, I can say that this has worked well for me. I call it simply...distraction. I also incorperated possitive affermations that I blended into my everyday. I used to walk everyday as it was said it would help, even though it didn't feel like it, I forced myself to walk everyday. Everything looked and felt strange but I just kept repeating to myself, "I'm getting better everyday, I'm getting better everyday." I also wrote in a journal all the "good" moments I had during the day and would end with a possive affermation, writing it and then saying it out loud. (Hey, when you're desperate, you'll do ANYTHING!!!)

Is it okay if I copy this advice (not the whole thread) and share it with the suffering dp/dr moms on my post partum site?

And, jc, I don't know you well yet, but I understand your frustration. I hope you don't think that the members of this forum don't want to hear from you anymore. But, I have been paranoid about the same type of stuff and shared that with the other moderators. I have always tended to think that I'm "different" and don't fit in and that people REALLY don't like me. I actually have been a bit paranoid that I started off on this forum in a bad way by sounding preachy and wonder if I may have pi$$ed anyone off. Then I have to remember that I might not be the center of the universe and just maybe nobody even thinks about what I've posted. Oh, well. Try not to sweat the small stuff and it's all small stuff.

Dp/dr is a really hard place to be. I don't think anyone here thinks any different. Please keep posting!

Carla


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## Guest (Sep 8, 2004)

Well, I can say that this has worked well for me. I call it simply...distraction. I also incorperated possitive affermations that I blended into my everyday. I used to walk everyday as it was said it would help, even though it didn't feel like it, I forced myself to walk everyday. Everything looked and felt strange but I just kept repeating to myself, "I'm getting better everyday, I'm getting better everyday." I also wrote in a journal all the "good" moments I had during the day and would end with a possive affermation, writing it and then saying it out loud. (Hey, when you're desperate, you'll do ANYTHING!!!)

Is it okay if I copy this advice (not the whole thread) and share it with the suffering dp/dr moms on my post partum site?

And, jc, I don't know you well yet, but I understand your frustration. I hope you don't think that the members of this forum don't want to hear from you anymore. But, I have been paranoid about the same type of stuff and shared that with the other moderators. I have always tended to think that I'm "different" and don't fit in and that people REALLY don't like me. I actually have been a bit paranoid that I started off on this forum in a bad way by sounding preachy and wonder if I may have pi$$ed anyone off. Then I have to remember that I might not be the center of the universe and just maybe nobody even thinks about what I've posted. Oh, well. Try not to sweat the small stuff and it's all small stuff.

Dp/dr is a really hard place to be. I don't think anyone here thinks any different. Please keep posting!

Carla


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## shadowness (Sep 12, 2004)

reading that has actually focused me more on stop thinking and start living!

i know i analyse things to death and when i try not to think of these things then i feel like i am just distracting myself instead of helping myself.

but you just need to break the cycle...

think of yourself as something positive instead of negative....

woohoo!

come on shadowness...you can do it...

all together now...

*starts chanting*

we can do it! we can do it!

*stops chanting*

sorry...

i need sleep...

:roll:


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## shadowness (Sep 12, 2004)

reading that has actually focused me more on stop thinking and start living!

i know i analyse things to death and when i try not to think of these things then i feel like i am just distracting myself instead of helping myself.

but you just need to break the cycle...

think of yourself as something positive instead of negative....

woohoo!

come on shadowness...you can do it...

all together now...

*starts chanting*

we can do it! we can do it!

*stops chanting*

sorry...

i need sleep...

:roll:


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## Guest (Sep 13, 2004)

come on shadowness...you can do it...

Yes you can!!! We can all do it!!!

Keep up the positive affermations!!!

Carla


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## Guest (Sep 13, 2004)

come on shadowness...you can do it...

Yes you can!!! We can all do it!!!

Keep up the positive affermations!!!

Carla


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## Guest (Sep 13, 2004)

Everyone here agrees that analysing things and self is the wrong thing to do. So why is psychoanalysis considered helpful?


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## Guest (Sep 13, 2004)

Everyone here agrees that analysing things and self is the wrong thing to do. So why is psychoanalysis considered helpful?


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## Guest (Sep 13, 2004)

well, for starters we're not really analyzing ourselves when we think we are. We are watching ourselves and observing our experience of living....basically scaring ourselves into an inversion of consciousness.

In analysis, when it's done well, the person has a chance to learn things/see how their mind works, in areas they would NEVER allow themselves to see in their own private meanderings.

What we do alone in the name of analyzing self and the universe is actually nothing but distraction - it keeps our attention away from areas where we're running games on ourselves. We end up thinking "wow, I sure am quite a thinker! I really understand so much more than the average person." uh, huh. sure. I thought the same thing. We're in a happy delusion that we are extraordinarily open-minded and profound. In truth, we're masters of self-deception.

Peace,
j


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## Guest (Sep 13, 2004)

well, for starters we're not really analyzing ourselves when we think we are. We are watching ourselves and observing our experience of living....basically scaring ourselves into an inversion of consciousness.

In analysis, when it's done well, the person has a chance to learn things/see how their mind works, in areas they would NEVER allow themselves to see in their own private meanderings.

What we do alone in the name of analyzing self and the universe is actually nothing but distraction - it keeps our attention away from areas where we're running games on ourselves. We end up thinking "wow, I sure am quite a thinker! I really understand so much more than the average person." uh, huh. sure. I thought the same thing. We're in a happy delusion that we are extraordinarily open-minded and profound. In truth, we're masters of self-deception.

Peace,
j


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