# What does lead to insanity???



## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

Since i fear that one day i am going to go completely crazy...even though i have been assured that i won't. i still believe that i will be the one person who's anxiety lead to insanity...My thoughts are out of control...my obsessive thought was really bad today, so bad that i just crawed into my bed and forced myself to sleep, it seems sleep it the only way out for me..

I was wondering.. How do people go crazy?

You see i obsess over how my mind works, how im able to picture images, have memory, think of one thing to the next everything to do with the mind..for me i feel im putting my sanity at risk everytime i think like that.. and what sucks more is that its my obesessive thought...i can't get rid of it...its confusing my obsessive thoughts are about thoughts....when i get too deep into it, it feels like im going to go completly crazy.

Does anyone know out there how people go nuts... I mean isn't it from thoughts...i always thought that people who think too deeply ( witch im doing) go nuts... like they think and think and think untill they think of something that there mind can't comphrehend and then go crazy...

One more thing..Im very afriad of turning into those people who are truly insane..who are locked up in a hospital and are just out of it....they have no clue whats what ...almost like there mentally retarted...are those people born like that? if not then i feel that if i keep thinking the way i do im going to turn into that..My thought is just way to intense for my mind to handle..


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## peaceboy23 (May 25, 2005)

I've been exactly where you are, and still go there sometimes. I actually asked a very similar question when I first joined this group a while ago. What causes insanity? Is there a kind of insanity that is not schizophrenia or multiple personalites, etc. Can you think yourself into it? I was looking through my old posts trying to find it, but I havent' been able to locate it yet, and to be honest I don't remember a lot of what was said. I will continue to look, though.
However, as far as I know, you can not "think" yourself insane. It just isn't possible. What causes it? I'm not sure, but i know a lot of it is chemical and some sort of brain imbalance (ie Schizophrenia). Why it happens I don't think even scientists know fully, there is still a lot of mystery. However, the only thing I can tell you is what I have been told, not that it's much help, because i sitll freak out about it and wonder if i will become schizophrenic, BUT if you are worried about going crazy, you are not going crazy. And the best advice I can give on the thoughts, and I know how hard it is, is to focuse on something else, force yourself to do something that requires your attention. Clean your house, watch TV, read a book, talk to friends, etc. It may seem agonizingly impossible at first, and not at all helpful, but eventually, it should start to help. But believe me, many of us know how you feel and have been there full fledged and I know how scary it is. But keep focusing outward, and have hope.


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## Lynch_mob (Jan 10, 2007)

I'm 100% positive you can. Like what you were saying Valley... I've also been there. And i'm almost 100% sure you can get lost.

Like the vicous circle i am in right now is a level of conciousness.. Normality is a higher level of it. But right now i'm stuck.

The last time I smoked pot with DP/DR in 100% full blown effect (thinking it would relax me) i ended up basically destroying ... thought. I can't think right now. I am a shell. I'm just starring thinking of nothing, Thinking about how i can't think. I don't even know how i am typing this message right now is how bad of a hole i'm in.

This is the level i'm at. And it fucked up because i can see the level (in my head) of normality but i just can't get to it. No matter how hard i try. And when i do try it get's worse. I'm in, looking out. I believe if i smoked dope or some kind of stimulent i would completly lose it. I would fall so far inside my own head i wouldn't be able to do anything.

A vegetable.'

(Sorry for spelling, i suck at it)


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## comfortably numb (Mar 6, 2006)

What causes insanity or schizophrenia as it's commonly called nobody really knows but im pretty sure you cant think yourself into it.

There is a chemical imbalance in schizophrenia but it's even debated on what neurotransmitter's are responsible for it. For year's the leading theory was the dopamine hypothesis where you have too much dopamine in your brain. All the old typical anti-psychotic's where mainly only dopamine antagonist's and taking them presumably reduced the positive symptom's of schizophrenia. Schizophrenia also closely resembles amphetamine psychosis and since amphetamines boost dopamine through the roof that also leed to that theory.

But in recent years the serotonin hypothesis has come into play. The newer atypical anti-psychotic's are serotonin antagonist's as well as dopamine antagonist's (although not as strong in that regard as the older anti-psychotic's) and have been shown to reduce both positive and negative symptom's much better then the older anti-psychotic's. They also have much less side effect's.

So the debate is still open really.


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## CECIL (Oct 3, 2004)

These kinds of thoughts are very, very common in those with DP. To be honest I'd be surprised if someone here HADN'T thought this way (including myself).

It may not set your mind at east, but I'll say it anyway. People with DP generally don't develop Schizophrenia or anything like that. You can worry about it if you want to but it won't send you "crazy".

And while we're at it, there's no such thing as "insane" anyway - just different perceptions of the world.


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

Lynch_mob, i feel me and you are in the same boat, but do u really think that you are going to go insane, it kind of scares ME to think that you think you are going to go crazy 100%, 100% means that yes we are going to go crazy forsure. i still have hope, but with our thought pattern its hard to hope, its hard to do anything exept try and keep our sanity. The only hope i have is that i have anxiety and anxiety can not turn into insanity.. but untill others expeirence what we are feeling and thinking, i know they all feel the same, but i don't think anyone out there beside me and you have the same thought. obesesson. it truly does feel like we are going to loose it one day, its really depressing..


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## artforsanitysake (Jan 17, 2006)

schizophrenia is characterized by forms of depersonalization & derealization - symptoms - but also includes symptoms like halucinations, paranoia, irrational disconnected thinking & thoughts. So a schizophrenic may derealize, but that doesn't mean that someone who is labeled as suffering from derealization syndrome in schizophrenic. does that make sense? :wink:


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## FloatingRoberto (Dec 6, 2006)

Blegh, schizophrenia must blow. Damn the last post got me hypochondriac about being a little schizo, anyways about going crazy. If going crazy with substance aid counts as going crazy I can tell you some reassuring things.
First of all you don't think "Oh no Im going crazy", but "Oh no I slipped the time in this invisible bag and screwed up the integrity of the universe while I'm falling to my bed. Watch the evil tree! Luckily the lights start dancing.  Did I have a body, or was that an illusion? At least Im a roaming spirit now ". Also crazy people don't realize what they are halucinating and what not, in contrast to sane halucinating people who know that they are seeing stuff that isn't there. Actually you posting here about being afraid to go insane is the best proof you aren't


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

Im not afraid of turning schizo...im afriad of turning completly insane...like those people that are soo insane that they are completly out of it...you know what i mean....like those people who don't know what is what..they have no clue about anything..there just completly out of it..im not sure if there born like that but thats what i fear....and it feels like one day if i continue to obsess over my thought that this will happen to me..im scared to death...


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## FloatingRoberto (Dec 6, 2006)

You mean Hollywood-insane 

But seriously, if you have health insurance that covers a shrink you can try that. Such dude eased my life with the simplest advices a man can give you.

"Get out and have fun"
"don't worry"
"take it easy"

Also it's great to be able to talk about stuff you normally won't tell anyone like fears and lusts. 

This sounds awfully corny, but it just works better when a well-paid person says it to you 

Hey, succes and take it easy


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## Dreamland (Jun 1, 2005)

Here's the deal: You can not think your self into insanity; take your DP experience for example....everytime when you feel so out of it with that sick, diseased, mental institution feeling in your gut, thinking that you'r about to lose it another layer peels away in your mind, and you're left with a new form of DP. You're still detached but not crazy, so instense fears of becoming crazy and locked up screaming at the bare cold walls in some institution leads to more DP, but not insanity. DP is an afliction of mood(like depression), not of thought like schizophrenia or psychosis, but our mind wants us to believe otherwise. The fear of going insane has been around forever, just like fear of dying.

I was in a strange hotel room for the last two days attending a work related conference and I too thought I was goin insane because I felt so detached and anxious, made worse by the foreign envirnmont and visual stimili.....Sh*t..!!...I was so scared that I was going to walk out of the balcony in my sleep in some crazed DP state in my sleep, jumping off the 9th floor!!! But it never happened....I feel a lot better now.


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## Lynch_mob (Jan 10, 2007)

But that's how it feel's, It's changed. The mind from this experienced has changed. Just because of the feeling's they way i see things now, it's flipped into a new perspective I didn't realize was here.

It just feel's like i will lock myself inside my head and throw away the key. It feel's like i HAVE the power to do it.

When i imagine those people sitting in a wheelchair completely spaced out, I see someone who lost themselves inside there head. This whole DP/DR thing has really made me realize how powerful the mind is.

This sound's dumb as hell, but i've actually tried to move stuff with my mind. LOL. No success, of course but that's just how much this is affecting me.

Dreamland - "thinking that you'r about to lose it another layer peels away in your mind, and you're left with a new form of DP."

Hmmm I've felt that exact same feeling, but i actually felt it lol. It felt like something was removed/ripped from my mind and it will never heal, or grow back.

And it;s not that i see myself in an institution or wan't to go crazy .. It's just feel's so close. Ask yourself what is normal. Cause DP/DR is not normal. It can't be, or else i wouldn't be posting here right now,..? But at the SAME time it doesn't feel like me typing this message. This parasite is so fucked up.

Valleyshadows - I don;t think we're going to go crazy for sure, i'm just saying i understand how people go crazy. I honestly feel like im holding on. It's dangling me over the pit. The pit being insanity. It's there but it won't let me go, like it's taunting me.

I agree out thought pattern's arn't "normal" and are hard to cope with, for the last Year, excactly one year i have been going to work, coming home with the EXACT same routine, i think the same thing's every day and indure the same uncomfortable postion's everday, it's quite sad, but i'm tierd of this.


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## chris51 (Mar 21, 2005)

No you will not go insane. Like someone said I think we've all been there. I know I have been numerous times. You can't think yourself insane. Also, you can't go insane when you are afraid you are....that's a contradiction. People who go insane don't realize it. You CAN go into an extreme state of anxiety that last awhile but even then it sounds like you know how to deal with that(sleep)....hey whatever it is.

Stop thinking your going nuts. Your not. Anyway if there is the tiny tiny chance that you did....it won't be today so might as well enjoy today 

however you look at it you WILL NOT GO INSANE.


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

Lynch_mob 
just reading your post brings chills down my spine, i think the exact way, and i feel that i understand how people go crazy, but we can be completly off...completly..insanity can be something completly opposite to what were thinking...i got a great email saying that us dr dp suffers are TOO sane...and i believe it....we are too aware on whats going on in our minds...way too aware that it feels like were risking are own sanity..

Lynch_mob like evryone else is saying we can't go insane from this..its sure feels like we are going to get soo lost in our minds that were going to be fu*%ed for life..but really it won't happen....i hope not..like you said the mind is sooo powerful and it feels like were using a bit too much of that power from the way we think...

i feel at this point of time that the only way to get out of this feeling is accually going insane.. i will always test my limits and try to keep thinking deep about my mind and see what will happen...all that happens to me is i get very depressed and confused.. and its like im addicted to thinking like this..its stuck with me..and one day im going to get stuck in my mind..

I have always thought that people went insane from thinking too deeply and getting lost in in there mind.. but from what other people are saying on here , it can't happen...


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## gaddis (Sep 18, 2005)

Masturbation.


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

Gadis, How old are you? what are you doing? why are you on here?

don't leave stupid posts on here, this is very serius to some people..


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## Catharsis (Jul 2, 2006)

^^ Shut up. gaddis obviously has many other worthwhile posts. 
If you can't stand one joke post, go fuck yourself.


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

this forum is about helping people, not telling jokes on a serius topic.. catharisis do u think what gaddis posted is necessary for this topic? do you think it helped me or anyone who can relate to my symptoms? please read the reply by gaddis one more time and get back to me.

sorry everybody, thanks for all your replys it really helped.


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## Catharsis (Jul 2, 2006)

You know what will help your DP? Not taking everything so seriously. Let it go.


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## Pollyanna 3098 (Dec 12, 2006)

> You know what will help your DP? Not taking everything so seriously. Let it go.


Well at least we can be thankful that no one takes you seriously 

3098


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## Catharsis (Jul 2, 2006)

Hah, don't go speaking for everyone now, bucko. If someone doesn't take ANY of my posts seriously it's only their loss.


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## Guest (Feb 3, 2007)

So much love....  where's mine? *opens arms up* =P


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## Guest (Feb 3, 2007)

BUCKO :lol: HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA

Who says BUCKO :lol:

G


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## Guest (Feb 3, 2007)

valleyshadows said:


> Gadis, How old are you? what are you doing? why are you on here?
> 
> don't leave stupid posts on here, this is very serius to some people..


Well i was gonna say it's down to "barrel rolling"... Am i wrong for this assumption?


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## Guest (Feb 3, 2007)

Im still the same person said:


> BUCKO :lol: HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA
> 
> Who says BUCKO :lol:
> 
> G


ROFLOL!!!! :lol:


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## Dreamland (Jun 1, 2005)

Now, this is insanity.......


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## Rozanne (Feb 24, 2006)

chris51 said:


> Like someone said I think we've all been there.


Every single bloody day. I've asked for anxiety meds now because I just can't take it anymore, it is terrifying.


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## Rozanne (Feb 24, 2006)

valleyshadows said:


> Gadis, How old are you? what are you doing? why are you on here?
> 
> don't leave stupid posts on here, this is very serius to some people..


Hm. Depersonalized came back and wrote something on That's Life. He said the site seems to have been overwhelmed by sex addicts.

I'm not passing judgements here: who am I to judge! But I think there is a time and a place. I mean, if someone is opening their heart over something it isn't very nice to feel someone has defaecated on your thread. Sorry to put it that way, but that is how it felt when someone did it to me the other day.

I was really offended when that troll put a link to paris-hilton-something-or-other on the thread where I write about therapy, which is a serious topic to me, and involved some trust that people wouldn't abuse my baring my soul.

Sex can be talked about seriously.

I mean, it wouldn't offend me if someone suggested that masturbation was the cure to all ills....I wouldn't agree with it, but it is a point of view. It's justs writing it for a reaction that makes it seem like a joke. And writing it in the the wrong place, even if it is said in a joking way, can be offensive.

Once again, two cents I fished out of my back pocket.


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## Guest (Feb 4, 2007)

> I've asked for anxiety meds now because I just can't take it anymore, it is terrifying.


BEWARE the benzo's they become VERY addictive Rozanne.
G. [/u]


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## Rozanne (Feb 24, 2006)

From what I understand so far, the doc isn't considering those anyway. I think he's looking at some type of med for anxiety and depression.

Still, I think I would consider a benzo though I certainly wouldn't have the willpower to give it up once I started.

That's one of the reasons I realise I probably need to go on something. I am smoking as a last resort to calm myself down.


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## comfortably numb (Mar 6, 2006)

Im still the same person said:


> > BEWARE the benzo's they become VERY addictive Rozanne.
> > G. [/u]


 It's mostly a physical addiction with them really no different then ssri's in that regard so i wouldnt worry too much about that aspect. Very few people find benzos to be psychologically addictive.

Im on clonazepam and for me it has no psychological addiction aspect to it at all. But since ive been on it a year going cold turkey might be dangerous and at the very least would put me through needless abrupt withdrawal symtom's.

If you want an example of drug's which can be very addicting in both aspect's opiates such as heroin, morphine or oxycodone would be a great example. Although ive been through opiate withdrawal's and it was a hell of alot easier then getting off effexor.


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## enngirl5 (Aug 10, 2004)

To the first person that posted, I've been exactly where you are. I once went to a site on mental illnesses and read up on every singe possible one to find out if I could possible get any of them. My mom works in a psychiatric ward and she doesn't get people with regular old anxiety in there. She gets schizophrenics, multiple personality (only a few throughout the years, it's very rare), depression, borderline, bipolar, etc. People that are a threat to themselves or other people. I talk to my therapist about what if I go crazy. He said if you do then that would mean he and my psychiatrist shouldn't even have a medical license because they would be completely wrong about what's wrong with me. It's anxiety. If anxiety wasn't this scary, it wouldn't turn otherwise healthy individuals into agoraphobis who can't even go to the grocery store or drive a mile from their house. It's the nature of the beast. It's fear making you dissacociate from situations that you perceive as scary.

When dp hits you, just try your best to ignore it, go on with what you're doing, and it will pass. Also try deep breathing, muscle relaxation (where you scan your entire body from top to bottom, cleanching each muscle and releasing, and also visualization (imagine a place that makes you really calm (the beach, a field, etc). All of these techniques will physically calm your body down and also take your mind off your thoughts. I've read many, many books on anxiety. That's all I did my first year that panic attacks and dp hit me.

Take care and try to just remind yourself all the time that it's just anxiety and you're scared so your body is reacting.


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## Lynch_mob (Jan 10, 2007)

Dreamland 
PostPosted: Sat Feb 03, 2007 7:49 pm Post subject:
"Now, this is insanity......."

*LoL, seriously...*

Anyway's... About insanity, the topic of this post... on a DP Help website not a DP put down site. Joke or no joke you should be mature enough to know when someone could get upset or offended. Do us all a favor next time and keep it to yourself.

I've actually havn't had the feeling of closeness to insanity lately... It seemed it's kind of went down with time, along with other thing's. But it is scary, and there is no real proof of how people truly do go insane, Famous Rock and Roll star's have done drug's and went insane... Who know's why? How? In my book's we can, and it's scary, But a part of me won't let me go yet. Only thing i do, is accept it, and accept that i have a lot of problem's... Untill then i hope i don't go insane lol


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

lynch_mob....once i get hope you come up with a repy thats scares me...ha...its not your fault your just saying whats on your mind...and thats good...but is there really no proof on how people go insane?? see thats what scares me now...


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## valleyshadows (Dec 15, 2006)

I find just lisening to what people say when there saying we can't go insane ....thats what i do...thats my only hope... it makes me feel alot better to know i can't go insane from this... but that last comment you made makes things a bit harder...thats completly awsome that your saying whats on your mind..but it really is holding me back a bit...you have to try and realize that we can't go insane from this.. PM me anytime you want


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## FloatingRoberto (Dec 6, 2006)

Oh well, maybe going insane isn't that bad. Drug induced psychosis is fun, so why shouldn't a real madness be great? Also, in modern western societies you get treatment when you go insane and find a cure or workaround in most cases. So the worst thing that can happen to you is that you end up in an asylum with cosy talkgroups, free food and legal drugs 

There are some tricks against obsessive fears.
Plan on daily base half an hour on an uncomfortable chair where you have to think about going loco and what can happen to you. Make it 3 o clock for example, so it doesnt interfere with sleep. The rest of the day you can say to yourselves "heck ill think about it at 3 o clock, let's focus on my chores for now"
You can also think of arguments why you are doing ok, and why you aren't going nuts.

Besides, ifyou can use a computer to ventilate your fears of going nutrs, you're thinking logically still


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## Guest (Feb 4, 2007)

*Depersonalization is NOT going to make you go crazy!!!*


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## Guest (Feb 4, 2007)

*Depersonalization is NOT going to make you go crazy!!!
*


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## Guest (Feb 4, 2007)

*Depersonalization is NOT going to make you go crazy!!! *


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## Guest (Feb 4, 2007)

Sorry, triple post,

But while I am here I may as well say it again.

*Depersonalization is NOT going to make you go crazy!!! *

G. :wink:


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## gaddis (Sep 18, 2005)

Gawsh! Talk about no sense of humor...!
Actually, at my worst DPness, the only slight reprieve I got was from a comedy TV show with Martin Mull and Fred Willard, America Tonight. The other 23 and a half hours were hell.
I once read about a case of DP in England where one guy only got relief from listening to dixieland jazz- not bop, swing or any other type of jazz or music- just dixieland.
But the fear of insanity is a serious concern in DP, and I shouldn't make light of it.
I spent some twenty odd years worrying about going nuts, and as far as I know, it still hasn't happened (although people that know me might have another idea ; ' ).
Anyway, fear of going insane is just another symptom of the DP/PD syndrome, and in my experience it never happens- at worst you just get more and more Dp'd.
Although I rarely post here anymore, my message is still the same:
all of these symptoms can be disposed of (in my experience) with a competent doctor who knows how to prescribe the correct doses (which may be different for each person) of antidepressants.
I've been DP free for almost 18 years because I'm still taking tricyclic antidepressants and have never stopped for ONE day.
There are many different types of ADs and you may not respond to many or a few, but when you find the right one with the right dose for the right period of time, freedom awaits.
For people who don't respond to ADs, Benzos can sometimes used, but some people build up a tolerance to them and larger and larger doses are needed, and there is the danger of addiction. I've never taken Klonopin so I can't say much about that drug.
However, some people don't develop a tolerance for them and can keep taking them for a long time, but benzos should only be used whe ADs fail.
Sleep is usually a big problem and with the new hypnotics (Ambien and Rozerum), there is no longer the problem with addiction that there was with benzos (Dalmane, Halcyon, etc...).
Many people here are still anti-drug, but if you don't want to take drugs for DP, nobody is forcing you...


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## comfortably numb (Mar 6, 2006)

FloatingRoberto said:


> Oh well, maybe going insane isn't that bad. Drug induced psychosis is fun, so why shouldn't a real madness be great?


 Drug induced psychosis is most certainly not fun at all. Im not talking about the effect's of LSD or magic mushroom's or any other psychedelic's either because they dont resemble schizophrenia at all. That theory went out year's ago.

Ive experienced drug induced psychosis do to alcohol and cocaine/crack and it was most certainly not fun. I was once up for 2 straight day's drinking very heavily and doing alittle bit of crack and i started seing shadows out of the corner of my eyes and i also saw thing's running across the floor. That is psychosis.

This was on the comedown so it was more then likely a combination of sleep deprivation, delirium tremens and the after effect's of a crappy coke comedown. If that is what schizophrenia is like i really pitty the poor people that have to live with it.


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## invisible.ink (Feb 2, 2007)

I agree with comfortably numb. Tripping or being high and drug induced psychosis are most definitely two totally different experiences. I highly doubt being "mad" is any fun.


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## CECIL (Oct 3, 2004)

Again on the original topic: I have been there too. To this day my most horrifying experience was sitting in the middle of a park in broad daylight. I remember thinking to myself "I should be feeling happy and content in this environment", but I was scared out of my mind because I thought at any moment my mind would slip into oblivion and I would cease to exist.

I've also had times where I was fucking sure I was going insane and that I'd be locked up in a hospital. As though at any moment the last neuron in my brain would snap and I'd lose it good. I even seriously thought about getting myself committed from time to time, but I didn't because I thought they would just laugh me out of the asylum.

The point is, you've already locked yourself up inside your head. The good news is that you can never lose the key. No matter how deep you go, there's always a road back. No injury is too bad to heal.

I know its hard to believe, because I posted here about going insane and got the same responses from other people on this site (i.e. you aren't going to go crazy). I couldn't believe it then, so you don't have to believe us now. But if you can bring yourself to believe us, it will ease your anxiety, guaranteed


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## widescreened (Jun 22, 2005)

There is nothing to fear except fear itself is the answer to this. Anticipational angst materializes in different ways and forms itself around different obsessions. The classic obsession is the one which cant be proven or disproven to be correct or otherwise. This way you can endulge in an endless loop of anxiety, avoiding life and issues that you are afraid to deal with.

Fear of going insane is a classic example of this. Fear of damnation is another. Fear of suicide is another. Fear of being afflicted with a treminal illness is yet another. Aids is another classic.

the answer is to confront what you are afraid of. If you can come to terms with it, great. If not fully, learn to accept it/yourself and live with yourself. meet yourself half way if you have to, anything to break the cycle of fear.


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## Guest (Feb 5, 2007)

> What does lead to insanity???


*thinks for bout five*... *puts head up*... BARREL ROLLIN! *nod*


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## CECIL (Oct 3, 2004)

Thanks Widescreened, that was a great post and I think it sums it up nicely 

An example of an anxiety loop for me would be asking a girl I like out. I don't want to because I think she would probably say no and not like me, so then I ruminate about "what if" but the "what if" will never go away unless I actually took the plunge.

So....around and around we go....but I never get anywhere, I'm ust stuck grinding my wheels in the mud


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## Fant?me (Feb 2, 2007)

I had (have still to a minor degree) drug induced psychosis. I was still relatively rational but for about a full year I would constantly see things like spatial distortions. Was pretty frightening but its pretty much gone.


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## Guest (Feb 6, 2007)

What does lead to insanity???










G.


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## Guest (Feb 6, 2007)

Im still the same person said:


> What does lead to insanity???
> 
> 
> 
> ...


*SCREAMS* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!


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