# used to



## My storm ran out of rain (Feb 6, 2012)

I used to...........

Love the way it smelled when it rains on a spring day.............now it just makes me mad that its going to be muddy

Love the feeling of a crisp wind on my face while in the woods...........now I still go in the woods but it does nothing for me

love watching sunsets..............now I cant remember to watch them

Love being a people person.........now people just piss me off and all I do is look at them and think about how fake they look

Love the excitement of anything............no more excitement, about anything

Love going on roadtrips...........now it scares me to drive very far at all

Love riding 4 wheelers...........now i only ride them so I dont have to walk around my farm

Love driving tractors.........now it's strictly my job

Love the beach...........now it seems so far away and does nothing for me at all when I do see it

Love the sounds of bugs outside my window on a warm summer night............now they just annoy me

Love the sight of the sun dawning on a new morning...........now it pisses me off that I have to live like this for another day

Love fishing.........now I could care less if I catch anything or not, I have to be forced to go

Love my house and the dead end road I live on...........now it pisses me off that I have to drive all the way down my road to get to my house, and I hate every fucking little bump on my road

Love going out and getting stupid at a ******* bar and making a drunken ass of myself...................now I'm scared to death to drink at all and havent had a drop since this all started

Love watching deer hunting on TV................now I cant remember what time shows even come on, unless someone texts me and tells me to watch them on their show and at what time it comes on. lol Clay

Love working on little projects in the garage..........now I am almost afraid to be alone out there..........pathetic, I know

Love how it feels right after you buy something new.........now I'm just pissed off that I have to find somewhere to put it

Love going to the mall and sitting on a bench and people watching.............now that many people in one place scares the shit outta me

These are all things that i miss so much since DP came in and ruined everything I loved......................sorry to be a downer, but I felt like blowing off some steam

Trying to appear normal on a daily basis is very exhausting


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## cbeck (Feb 8, 2008)

I hear ya man..Have every feeling you have quoted..All to familiar.


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## Whitehazel (Jun 14, 2011)

I'm so sorry you have to go through this.

I feel the same way you do...

All we can do is keep going and hope one day it gets better!


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## My storm ran out of rain (Feb 6, 2012)

Whitehazel said:


> I'm so sorry you have to go through this.
> 
> I feel the same way you do...
> 
> All we can do is keep going and hope one day it gets better!


Yeah I sure hope we do, a person just doesnt realize how happy they were in life before this shit happened


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## Overloaded (Sep 8, 2011)

It's a bitch man. I feel bad for you, because I know exactly how you feel.

There were a lot of simple things I took pleasure in which are basically dead to me now. But there are the odd few remaining.


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## My storm ran out of rain (Feb 6, 2012)

Overloaded said:


> It's a bitch man. I feel bad for you, because I know exactly how you feel.
> 
> There were a lot of simple things I took pleasure in which are basically dead to me now. But there are the odd few remaining.


Yea luckily I have started to find a few things that I enjoy again, but they just arent the same as they used to be. This has just made me so negative about everything, I never used to be like that. Hopefully it will all be over soon


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## Realiity (Apr 26, 2009)

I know exactly how you feel. Absolutely sucks.


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