# What happening with me?



## Starovoit (Mar 7, 2015)

I'm 21 and I do not know what happened to me. I'm not sure. I feel confused, lost and scared as f**k. 
Three months ago, I first tried marijuana and experienced bad trip, since that I experiencing terrible symptoms. If anybody have these, and if so - which?

- Fixation on condition, fear, anxiety, huge sadness, I cant feel the *life*, cant feel any happiness, so messed up;
- *Automatic*, robotic feeling;
- I do not feel alive presence here and now, its like I get lost inside my head;
- Movements of the body like a little constrained, I feel my body numb, it does not belong to me, and when I walking it feels like I just standing on the site;
- When I do something, not quite sure am I did it or I just thought, its like I don't believe my *eyes*, and it feels so crazy to me;
- All around strange and pointless, like an *illusion*, like a dream and I can not wake up myself;
- Headache at the back of head;
- Time wraps (slower/faster).

Sometimes it goes better and even almost away leaving only painful philosophical ideas and thoughts, but sometimes I can suffering from that 24/7.
It all makes myself so hard to distract to work/hobby/study.
All this very painful and makes me tired, even brings me to tears (never cried before).
I am very worried that become schizophrenic, or going to, or gonna stay here forever.

I feel trapped and helpless.

PS: Help my to figure out if I have a DPDRD or early stages of schizophrenia, please.


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## RichUK (Oct 6, 2011)

Sounds like DR to me, also the fact you no you have an issue and thats something is wrong doesnt sound like schizoprenia, people with that generally dont see an issue and think there actions and feelings are normal.

dont try and distract yourself from the thoughts or block them out just allow them to be there but try and give them less and less attention.

The feeling you have are classic of DR your not going crazy and you can and will get over this wil just take time


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## AylaStar (Jan 4, 2015)

Welcome Starovoit.

I'm so sorry you are experiencing this. But there is hope. First thing is to meet with your doctor and get a diagnosis. I believe DP/DR sufferers need to learn how to be advocates for ourselves because not a lot of doctors have much knowledge about it so go prepared.

Recovery from this can happen instantaneously or take some time, but it can happen and I believe chances are 100% for those willing to do the work.

I recommend reading the forums. For me it was helpful to read the symptoms of others for a while so that I could believe I wasn't alone. It was horribly comforting to find out names for symptoms I was having. However, don't linger there too much. It's the thinking nature of this disorder to have us fixate and even adopt symptoms we might not have had before. The best thing to do is scour the 'Recovery Stories' tab. Not only are they inspiring, but they can give you different solutions to try on your road to recovery.

Just be gentle with yourself. You are going through a scary experience but you are not being permanently damaged and you will get your life back. You just have a little work to do.

Please let me know if you have any questions. The chat can be helpful if you need a distraction and there's usually at least 1 or two people that are in there a lot of the time.

Stay strong. You can do this.


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