# Visual Disturbances/Distortions



## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

Who else here on this website has visual disturbances or very sensative vision as apart of this whole experience? I know there has been posts about this in the past, but NOONE, not one person, has ever fully explained to me why i have visual disturbances and sensative vision. I don't understand how it relates to anxiety??? I guess i can understand how my past drug use may have caused it, but in a way i don't because its not like everyone who smokes weed gets visual disturbances. I went to the eye doctor like back in January and he said my vision was fine and that my eyes were fine. Are these visual disturbances related to HPPD, which is obviously related to DP/DR, and marijuana is a mild halluinnagenic. The thing is they aren't severe all the time like someone who has HPPD because of ACID or LSD, but they are still annoying and bothersome. Is there any possible way to make them better or go away completely??

Heres a list of my visual disturbances

Floaters- especially when im outside, up at the sky or looking at certain computer screens, They aren't there all of the time, unless i look up at the sky, they are usually always there than.

Little sparks kinda similar to floaters, usually only see those when i look up at the sky.

After images ( trailers) I get these sometimes if i look at the TV and look away, i can see for a second an after image of the TV.

When im in certain lighting, i just get all types of like staticky graininess in my vision, i also sometimes get this at night in the dark.

Also my eyes seem to be more sensative to bright sunlight

Sometimes things seem to shimmer when i look at them, especially at certain times or under certain lighting. Its really quite disturbing.

A few times in the past ive gotten that microcosm thing

Theres probably some other things im leaving out to, but overall its very annoying and i wish they would go away. I mean how long can this shit possibly last?? I haven't smoked any weed in what 9 months now.

If anyone has any valuable insight on this type of thing, it would be greatly appreciated it. I mean what exactly is this a result of ?? Is it something physical or psychological??

Peace


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

Who else here on this website has visual disturbances or very sensative vision as apart of this whole experience? I know there has been posts about this in the past, but NOONE, not one person, has ever fully explained to me why i have visual disturbances and sensative vision. I don't understand how it relates to anxiety??? I guess i can understand how my past drug use may have caused it, but in a way i don't because its not like everyone who smokes weed gets visual disturbances. I went to the eye doctor like back in January and he said my vision was fine and that my eyes were fine. Are these visual disturbances related to HPPD, which is obviously related to DP/DR, and marijuana is a mild halluinnagenic. The thing is they aren't severe all the time like someone who has HPPD because of ACID or LSD, but they are still annoying and bothersome. Is there any possible way to make them better or go away completely??

Heres a list of my visual disturbances

Floaters- especially when im outside, up at the sky or looking at certain computer screens, They aren't there all of the time, unless i look up at the sky, they are usually always there than.

Little sparks kinda similar to floaters, usually only see those when i look up at the sky.

After images ( trailers) I get these sometimes if i look at the TV and look away, i can see for a second an after image of the TV.

When im in certain lighting, i just get all types of like staticky graininess in my vision, i also sometimes get this at night in the dark.

Also my eyes seem to be more sensative to bright sunlight

Sometimes things seem to shimmer when i look at them, especially at certain times or under certain lighting. Its really quite disturbing.

A few times in the past ive gotten that microcosm thing

Theres probably some other things im leaving out to, but overall its very annoying and i wish they would go away. I mean how long can this shit possibly last?? I haven't smoked any weed in what 9 months now.

If anyone has any valuable insight on this type of thing, it would be greatly appreciated it. I mean what exactly is this a result of ?? Is it something physical or psychological??

Peace


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

also my right eye has been twitching all day


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

also my right eye has been twitching all day


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

I think most of your visual disturbances are normal. For instance, After images ( trailers) I get these sometimes if i look at the TV and look away, i can see for a second an after image of the TV. 
That always happens to me and I think nothing of it. It's probably just your eyes getting adjusted to..something. My eyes are sensitive to bright sunlight. I don't know how to explain why you get all of these..I even get them and most of them are your eyes adjusting to the light/dark.


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

I think most of your visual disturbances are normal. For instance, After images ( trailers) I get these sometimes if i look at the TV and look away, i can see for a second an after image of the TV. 
That always happens to me and I think nothing of it. It's probably just your eyes getting adjusted to..something. My eyes are sensitive to bright sunlight. I don't know how to explain why you get all of these..I even get them and most of them are your eyes adjusting to the light/dark.


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

The shimmers MIGHT be caused from drug use (and might be a from of HPPD, that syndrome that is a neurological response to certain rec drugs and can only go away with time).

The trails of light MIGHT be the same, but most of us with anxiety also have had that. Do the trails last longer than a second or so? If longer, might be the HPPD, but if only a second or so, then yep...the big A.

The others? floaters, etc. all the others you mentioned...I had 'em all, my friend. It's not that anxiety CAUSES them, but anxiety states cause us to perceive them. They're there, all the time. Right now I also see floaters because we're talking about floaters. By the time I hit SUBMIT, I won't see them anymore.

I know it's so hard to believe. I was convinced I had some eye problem that was related to the brain tumor I also thought I had, lol...

Anxiety. 
Pure and simple. A state of Post-Trauma terror, and it keeps the body/brain in an overreactive mode as long as the symptoms go on.

Peace,
Janine


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

The shimmers MIGHT be caused from drug use (and might be a from of HPPD, that syndrome that is a neurological response to certain rec drugs and can only go away with time).

The trails of light MIGHT be the same, but most of us with anxiety also have had that. Do the trails last longer than a second or so? If longer, might be the HPPD, but if only a second or so, then yep...the big A.

The others? floaters, etc. all the others you mentioned...I had 'em all, my friend. It's not that anxiety CAUSES them, but anxiety states cause us to perceive them. They're there, all the time. Right now I also see floaters because we're talking about floaters. By the time I hit SUBMIT, I won't see them anymore.

I know it's so hard to believe. I was convinced I had some eye problem that was related to the brain tumor I also thought I had, lol...

Anxiety. 
Pure and simple. A state of Post-Trauma terror, and it keeps the body/brain in an overreactive mode as long as the symptoms go on.

Peace,
Janine


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

Janine

the Trailers/After Images usually only last like a second or so, so i guess its not HPPD.

So how do i make these things go away???????


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

Janine

the Trailers/After Images usually only last like a second or so, so i guess its not HPPD.

So how do i make these things go away???????


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## smog (Aug 10, 2004)

Yep, yeah and sure.. Have them all.

The sparks, the floaters, graininess. This is how our eyes work. This is how all eyes work.

If you look at the TV for a second and close your eyes it will cause an after image, like the flash of a camera, that can easily last for up to half a minute if you focus on it. The photoreceptors in our eyes need time to fade out or something. Of course, this was no news to you.

Like Janine said, everyone has floaters when they focus on them.
I used to have so much anxiety over my floaters. Anxious over the fact that i could not escape them. I used to rub my eyes over and over again in hope for them to go away.

I think it's all about anxiety keeping us focused on them. Anxiety and our DP/DR.

When you think of it, the whole point of our eyes is to perceive the world with enough clarity that we can navigate in and interact with it. Some sparks or a floater or two makes no hinder. We shoudn't focus on what our eyes perceive, but what our brain makes out of it. When you look at a table, there's no need to think "ok, this table is black, have four legs, and is infected with floaters and sparks". Just trust your brains perception that say "This is a black table".

Ok.. Time to end this post. I guess i'm making no sense to anyone but me now


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## smog (Aug 10, 2004)

Yep, yeah and sure.. Have them all.

The sparks, the floaters, graininess. This is how our eyes work. This is how all eyes work.

If you look at the TV for a second and close your eyes it will cause an after image, like the flash of a camera, that can easily last for up to half a minute if you focus on it. The photoreceptors in our eyes need time to fade out or something. Of course, this was no news to you.

Like Janine said, everyone has floaters when they focus on them.
I used to have so much anxiety over my floaters. Anxious over the fact that i could not escape them. I used to rub my eyes over and over again in hope for them to go away.

I think it's all about anxiety keeping us focused on them. Anxiety and our DP/DR.

When you think of it, the whole point of our eyes is to perceive the world with enough clarity that we can navigate in and interact with it. Some sparks or a floater or two makes no hinder. We shoudn't focus on what our eyes perceive, but what our brain makes out of it. When you look at a table, there's no need to think "ok, this table is black, have four legs, and is infected with floaters and sparks". Just trust your brains perception that say "This is a black table".

Ok.. Time to end this post. I guess i'm making no sense to anyone but me now


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## stickdude (Aug 13, 2004)

hey man, i have all those visual disturbances, so don't feel left out. i have no idea what started them, but i'll say anxiety maybe, because i think they started back when i started having panic attacks and the such.


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## stickdude (Aug 13, 2004)

hey man, i have all those visual disturbances, so don't feel left out. i have no idea what started them, but i'll say anxiety maybe, because i think they started back when i started having panic attacks and the such.


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## shadowness (Sep 12, 2004)

my sight is the most frightening thing at the mo...

everything just looks 2D and i feel like i am just observing everything around me and not interacting...

i think my dp/dr has been caused by an allergic reaction to meds about 4-5 months ago...

i just cannot stop saying to myself 'everything looks unreal' and 'nothing feels real'....

my vision has been checked and all is fine...

so i guess it is just the way i perceive my sight that is causing this with the anxiety (however slight) hightening the thoughts and feelings.


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## shadowness (Sep 12, 2004)

my sight is the most frightening thing at the mo...

everything just looks 2D and i feel like i am just observing everything around me and not interacting...

i think my dp/dr has been caused by an allergic reaction to meds about 4-5 months ago...

i just cannot stop saying to myself 'everything looks unreal' and 'nothing feels real'....

my vision has been checked and all is fine...

so i guess it is just the way i perceive my sight that is causing this with the anxiety (however slight) hightening the thoughts and feelings.


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

Yes

I Always Seem To See A Flash Of Light At The Corner Of My Eye If I Look A Certain Direction Too Fast

And Sometimes Ill See THings As If Their Pulsating Very Quickly (But Nothing Too Severe Like Seeing My Bed Spin In Mid Air At 8000 RPMs LoL)

Its From Being Zoned, Ur Eyes Get Sensitive An Foggy An The Way Ur Mind Perceives Things Is Amplifyed 200000%


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## Guest (Sep 15, 2004)

Yes

I Always Seem To See A Flash Of Light At The Corner Of My Eye If I Look A Certain Direction Too Fast

And Sometimes Ill See THings As If Their Pulsating Very Quickly (But Nothing Too Severe Like Seeing My Bed Spin In Mid Air At 8000 RPMs LoL)

Its From Being Zoned, Ur Eyes Get Sensitive An Foggy An The Way Ur Mind Perceives Things Is Amplifyed 200000%


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## Matt210 (Aug 15, 2004)

Hey.. late for class so i didnt read the replies.. and i dont know what help youve been offered so far..

BUT I just wanted to say.. ive NEVER touched a drug in my life.. and last summer (over a year ago now) .. i went through almost EVERY eye issue in the book. I went through so many eye tests.. every one said my eyes were fine.

I had floaters, after-images, dragged out vision, distorted vision, blurred vision, cloudy vision, skipping vision (my vision would seem to freeze frame everyonce in a while, and then skip for a split second)....

I convinced myself I was going blind.. or had a brain tumor or something.. almost all of them are gone for the most part now tho.. I wouldnt worry too much about it (coming from the guy whos convinced he's lost his memory, and is in a constant state of panic lol)...


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## Matt210 (Aug 15, 2004)

Hey.. late for class so i didnt read the replies.. and i dont know what help youve been offered so far..

BUT I just wanted to say.. ive NEVER touched a drug in my life.. and last summer (over a year ago now) .. i went through almost EVERY eye issue in the book. I went through so many eye tests.. every one said my eyes were fine.

I had floaters, after-images, dragged out vision, distorted vision, blurred vision, cloudy vision, skipping vision (my vision would seem to freeze frame everyonce in a while, and then skip for a split second)....

I convinced myself I was going blind.. or had a brain tumor or something.. almost all of them are gone for the most part now tho.. I wouldnt worry too much about it (coming from the guy whos convinced he's lost his memory, and is in a constant state of panic lol)...


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## Guest (Sep 16, 2004)

shadowness said:


> my sight is the most frightening thing at the mo...
> 
> everything just looks 2D and i feel like i am just observing everything around me and not interacting...
> 
> ...


One of the first things I became aware of when my DP/DR began was the flatness of everything. It was sort of like looking down the street where i lived and it was like looking at a picture in a book. All the house were two dimensional like you said. The colores were dull as well. I began to have frightening thughts that I was living in a book on a page and that at any moment the person reading the book will turn the page and I will be gone.

That was almost forty years ago and i am still here. Panic and DP/DR have subsided but took a toll upon my personality. That is my life is a sort of compromise between being actively involved with things on a feeling level and remaining an isolate. My sense of personhood is very small as a consequence of adjustment to my DP/DR. But at least i no longer live a terrified sort of existence. It is always there for me just beneath the surface. With a switch of my thoughts I can conjure up a DP state. Although sometimes it breaks through on its own under certain conditions.

But I definitely feel free from the constant terror I once felt.


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## Guest (Sep 16, 2004)

shadowness said:


> my sight is the most frightening thing at the mo...
> 
> everything just looks 2D and i feel like i am just observing everything around me and not interacting...
> 
> ...


One of the first things I became aware of when my DP/DR began was the flatness of everything. It was sort of like looking down the street where i lived and it was like looking at a picture in a book. All the house were two dimensional like you said. The colores were dull as well. I began to have frightening thughts that I was living in a book on a page and that at any moment the person reading the book will turn the page and I will be gone.

That was almost forty years ago and i am still here. Panic and DP/DR have subsided but took a toll upon my personality. That is my life is a sort of compromise between being actively involved with things on a feeling level and remaining an isolate. My sense of personhood is very small as a consequence of adjustment to my DP/DR. But at least i no longer live a terrified sort of existence. It is always there for me just beneath the surface. With a switch of my thoughts I can conjure up a DP state. Although sometimes it breaks through on its own under certain conditions.

But I definitely feel free from the constant terror I once felt.


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## JAG (Aug 31, 2004)

soul bro

I've had all those symptoms now for almost 24 years. However, I didn't know then what I know now. I just diagnosed myself last year when I found websites talking about depersonalization and derealization. And then later was "officially" diagnosed by a doctor.

My point for telling you how long I went undiagnosed is to tell you that no matter what you can live with DP/DR. I use to think I was the only person living suffering from it and so concealed it for years. I felt I was basically willing myself to remain sane. Don't be afraid of this thing. In all those years no matter how much I worried about it it didn't get worse. And look someone posted before me that he has had it for almost 40 years, and he's fine as well. The main thing is don't work yourself up over it.


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## JAG (Aug 31, 2004)

soul bro

I've had all those symptoms now for almost 24 years. However, I didn't know then what I know now. I just diagnosed myself last year when I found websites talking about depersonalization and derealization. And then later was "officially" diagnosed by a doctor.

My point for telling you how long I went undiagnosed is to tell you that no matter what you can live with DP/DR. I use to think I was the only person living suffering from it and so concealed it for years. I felt I was basically willing myself to remain sane. Don't be afraid of this thing. In all those years no matter how much I worried about it it didn't get worse. And look someone posted before me that he has had it for almost 40 years, and he's fine as well. The main thing is don't work yourself up over it.


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

My DP all started after taking LSD on most weekends for about a period of 6 months..
I stopped for a while because i started feeling,, just weird is the only way to describe it.

Then a month later i felt fine,, so i started taking LSD the odd weekend and the feelings came back, this was when i was 19. 
I stopped taking LSD at that point all together, but slowly after about 2 months started seeing trails of images, and when i would see trails i would actually feel a sensation in my temporal lobes..

Its been 9 years since then, i rarely see them anymore unless i am under alot of stress or havent slept well.

I just experience the DP/DR now, more so in the winter months..
Fighting it with Lamictal and Klonopin has seemed to work best, but some antidepressants have helped..

Mostly MAOI's like parnate and nardil, also Effexor did help me for about a year, then just slowly stopped.


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

My DP all started after taking LSD on most weekends for about a period of 6 months..
I stopped for a while because i started feeling,, just weird is the only way to describe it.

Then a month later i felt fine,, so i started taking LSD the odd weekend and the feelings came back, this was when i was 19. 
I stopped taking LSD at that point all together, but slowly after about 2 months started seeing trails of images, and when i would see trails i would actually feel a sensation in my temporal lobes..

Its been 9 years since then, i rarely see them anymore unless i am under alot of stress or havent slept well.

I just experience the DP/DR now, more so in the winter months..
Fighting it with Lamictal and Klonopin has seemed to work best, but some antidepressants have helped..

Mostly MAOI's like parnate and nardil, also Effexor did help me for about a year, then just slowly stopped.


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## Johanna (Aug 15, 2004)

Yeah, I have those same kind of visual disturbances/after images. I also wondered where those come from, but quess it's all related to anxiety cause I don't remember having those before this all started. I don't even try to start describing those disturbances in english, quess my wordbook wouldn't be enough.... :wink:


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## Johanna (Aug 15, 2004)

Yeah, I have those same kind of visual disturbances/after images. I also wondered where those come from, but quess it's all related to anxiety cause I don't remember having those before this all started. I don't even try to start describing those disturbances in english, quess my wordbook wouldn't be enough.... :wink:


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

I was once told by a therapiat that 90 different areas of the body are affected by anxiety, including the eyes. I know that the pupils dialate letting in more light. We must remember our bodies and nervous system are fragile and when we are always worried and over analyzing and fuctioniong at a hightened state of alert things are bound to go a little haywire. I have what I call perceptual distortions and visual distortions. But remember our bodies are meant to heal themselves. We will all heal given time, rest, correct nutrition, correct thinking, exercise, and therapy. This is not an absolute but it is the way our bodies and nature work. We need to focus on the whole picture, not just the mind or just taking pharmacuticals, but the whole being. The body and mind want to get back to a state of equallibrium, but we all get in our own way through our distructive thinking and the viscious cycle of fear.

Just some of my thoughts  
Sassy


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

I was once told by a therapiat that 90 different areas of the body are affected by anxiety, including the eyes. I know that the pupils dialate letting in more light. We must remember our bodies and nervous system are fragile and when we are always worried and over analyzing and fuctioniong at a hightened state of alert things are bound to go a little haywire. I have what I call perceptual distortions and visual distortions. But remember our bodies are meant to heal themselves. We will all heal given time, rest, correct nutrition, correct thinking, exercise, and therapy. This is not an absolute but it is the way our bodies and nature work. We need to focus on the whole picture, not just the mind or just taking pharmacuticals, but the whole being. The body and mind want to get back to a state of equallibrium, but we all get in our own way through our distructive thinking and the viscious cycle of fear.

Just some of my thoughts  
Sassy


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## shadowness (Sep 12, 2004)

Sassy said:


> I was once told by a therapiat that 90 different areas of the body are affected by anxiety, including the eyes. I know that the pupils dialate letting in more light. We must remember our bodies and nervous system are fragile and when we are always worried and over analyzing and fuctioniong at a hightened state of alert things are bound to go a little haywire. I have what I call perceptual distortions and visual distortions. But remember our bodies are meant to heal themselves. We will all heal given time, rest, correct nutrition, correct thinking, exercise, and therapy. This is not an absolute but it is the way our bodies and nature work. We need to focus on the whole picture, not just the mind or just taking pharmacuticals, but the whole being. The body and mind want to get back to a state of equallibrium, but we all get in our own way through our distructive thinking and the viscious cycle of fear.
> 
> Just some of my thoughts
> Sassy


YOU...

yes YOU...

have just made my day!



thank you so much for that post!


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## shadowness (Sep 12, 2004)

Sassy said:


> I was once told by a therapiat that 90 different areas of the body are affected by anxiety, including the eyes. I know that the pupils dialate letting in more light. We must remember our bodies and nervous system are fragile and when we are always worried and over analyzing and fuctioniong at a hightened state of alert things are bound to go a little haywire. I have what I call perceptual distortions and visual distortions. But remember our bodies are meant to heal themselves. We will all heal given time, rest, correct nutrition, correct thinking, exercise, and therapy. This is not an absolute but it is the way our bodies and nature work. We need to focus on the whole picture, not just the mind or just taking pharmacuticals, but the whole being. The body and mind want to get back to a state of equallibrium, but we all get in our own way through our distructive thinking and the viscious cycle of fear.
> 
> Just some of my thoughts
> Sassy


YOU...

yes YOU...

have just made my day!



thank you so much for that post!


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

Sassy said:


> I was once told by a therapiat that 90 different areas of the body are affected by anxiety, including the eyes. I know that the pupils dialate letting in more light.


So true, which would explain why i wear my sunglasses alot.. 
Cant stand it to bright, even when others don't find it bright at all..


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

Sassy said:


> I was once told by a therapiat that 90 different areas of the body are affected by anxiety, including the eyes. I know that the pupils dialate letting in more light.


So true, which would explain why i wear my sunglasses alot.. 
Cant stand it to bright, even when others don't find it bright at all..


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

Johanna said:


> Yeah, I have those same kind of visual disturbances/after images. I also wondered where those come from, but quess it's all related to anxiety cause I don't remember having those before this all started. I don't even try to start describing those disturbances in english, quess my wordbook wouldn't be enough.... :wink:


It is overactivity in the temporal lobes, not really seizures just lingering activity..

There is a post around here that explains it in greater detail, but i couldnt find it again when i searched..


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## Guest (Oct 2, 2004)

Johanna said:


> Yeah, I have those same kind of visual disturbances/after images. I also wondered where those come from, but quess it's all related to anxiety cause I don't remember having those before this all started. I don't even try to start describing those disturbances in english, quess my wordbook wouldn't be enough.... :wink:


It is overactivity in the temporal lobes, not really seizures just lingering activity..

There is a post around here that explains it in greater detail, but i couldnt find it again when i searched..


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## Nate (Nov 3, 2004)

SB,

I've been reading this site for years and this is my first post. I've finally decided to post because the visual disturbances you describe are exactly what I suffer from and are the only symptoms I seem to have regarding DP/DR. In fact, I think I only suffer from "DR" and not "DP" because of the visual problems, and I don't identify with many of the symptoms people usually ascribe to DP.

I've been suffering with these visual disturbances for over 6 years.

The main problems with vision that I have are a sort of shimmering effect especially when I look at patterns like a grate in the sidewalk or the pattern of bricks in a wall. However, most things shimmer, even if they're not in a pattern. Also, I seem to have an oversensitivity to light and experience "trailers". And also, at night when I look at the stars, I see all kinds of visual "noise". It's like I can't see complete darkness anymore. Also, when I read, the contrast of the black letters on the white paper shimmer and can be quite distracting if I dwell on it too much.

I've been to the eye doctor and a neurologist and I've even had an MRI and everything checks out just fine. I'm on meds now and while my outlook and mood has changed significantly for the better, I still experience these visual disturbances.

I understand some people have talked about the temporal lobe in relation to these symptoms so I think I'm going to get and EEG and see if anything's abnormal there.

Oh, and I don't know what you mean when you talk about the "microcosm thing."

-Nate



SoulBrotha said:


> Heres a list of my visual disturbances
> 
> Floaters- especially when im outside, up at the sky or looking at certain computer screens, They aren't there all of the time, unless i look up at the sky, they are usually always there than.
> 
> ...


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## Guest (Nov 4, 2004)

for some reason lately i haven't been paying attention to the " disturbances" and they haven't been there as much.

i believe Microcosm is when things appear smaller or closer than they really are?


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## Nate (Nov 3, 2004)

For me, they are always present but sometimes more noticeable than others. I can go weeks where they don't bother me, and then there are flare-ups where they're very distracting.

In the beginning, they drove me crazy. After six years, I know how to handle them. Still, I hold out hope that one day they'll go away completely.

-N


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