# I feel like a parasite



## whatisthis (Feb 27, 2009)

I feel like I am draining those around me. Everyone is trying to help me, but I can't seem to help myself. Sometimes I feel parasitic, as if I am sucking the life out from those who are closest to me. Do I just cut the ties and let them live their lives or do I pretend to keep going on like normal, even though they know it's not normal. Do I fake it till I make it? I don't know what I'm talking about. . it's late and I'm extremely nervous. I just feel like I am a burden to those around me. I don't exist- I'm off in lala land and my husband is left with making all of our decisions. Sorry for the rant, just something I have been feeling lately.


----------



## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

whatisthis said:


> I feel like I am draining those around me. Everyone is trying to help me, but I can't seem to help myself. Sometimes I feel parasitic, as if I am sucking the life out from those who are closest to me. Do I just cut the ties and let them live their lives or do I pretend to keep going on like normal, even though they know it's not normal. Do I fake it till I make it? I don't know what I'm talking about. . it's late and I'm extremely nervous. I just feel like I am a burden to those around me. I don't exist- I'm off in lala land and my husband is left with making all of our decisions. Sorry for the rant, just something I have been feeling lately.


Depending on how bad you are feeling, sometimes all you can do is surrender. I went through a really bad phase recently. I thought I was going to for sure have a nervous breakdown. I felt a lot of pressure in my body, and I had major DP. I was in physical pain. All I could think about were some really troubling thoughts, and upsetting things. I had to rely on my boyfriend to help me. I was a mess. I didn't want to. I had to take everything moment to moment, and be very gentle with myself. I really thought I was going crazy. Anyhow, my point is to try and not worry so much about other people. If you are not well, and you are being a burden on them, it is really up to them to set the limit with you. They are adults. When you are feeling better, you will be better able to contribute your time and energy to helping them and also reciprocate if you feel the need even if it is with a thank you card. I hope you feel better. I know you will. Better days are ahead. Try and not feel guilty. The fact that you are aware of the possibility of draining them means to me that you probably will not drain them. I hope I have been of some help!


----------



## dpsince2002 (Oct 26, 2008)

I definitely know the feeling, and I think that's part of what makes it tough for me to talk about my symptoms, maybe, along with not wanting to be seen as psychotic. I don't want to worry people by telling them how crazy it really is in here. But it seems like I worry people like my mom more by not talking about it, probably. If I can talk about how it's getting better (which it is, in little ways), then it helps them.


----------

