# Recovered for over two years and (finally returning to post!



## tamachan (Apr 20, 2009)

I had extreme derealization after smoking pot my senior year of high school. I didn't have a panic attack smoking, came down normally, and went to bed. The next morning in class, the dreamy feeling hit me, and didn't leave for about 10 months. I couldn't focus, couldn't sleep, felt panicky all the time, and practically lived like a robot. I would panic when I left the house and feel uncomfortable 24/7 unless I was by myself on the computer. My derealization hit during a time when I was stressed about getting into college, had just ended a 3-year relationship, and was worried about SATs and the like. In retrospect, I truly believe the pot was just a trigger. There's no question in my mind that the pot simply sets off the panic. When I used to read horror stories on line about how people thought permanent damage had occurred, I worried I'd be like this forever. However, in retrospect, and through becoming more educated on the matter, I know now that nothing irreversible happened. 
In the beginning, I checked this site and surfed the web for similar stories all the time. The only time I seemed to be able to focus was when I was reading about derealization. I would go to Border's and just sit and read every book I could find on anxiety, looking for any hope I could find. I finally went to see a therapist, who assured me that I wasn't hopeless and could overcome this. It's been a long time now, but honestly, I overcame this by just living. I made myself endure the uneasiness I felt when I was in social situations, and just began spending my time doing other things. I thought I'd freak out in college and have to go home, but I made it through the stress, and am now entering my senior year in college derealization free. 
I think in the beginning, it was good to read inspirational stories and self-help books so that I knew I wasn't alone. But at a certain point, I needed to just get off the computer because I had all the information that I could possibly get. I've had a few off-days here and there, but they don't freak me out anymore. I know I can handle myself, and I'm not scared of it anymore. The less DR scared me, the less I got it. Now, I feel like I can barely remember what it was like. I did go on to smoke pot twice after the incident, mostly to prove to myself that DR could not hurt me any more. It was the emotional state I was in, not the drug, that kept the DR going. I'm back to normal, am planning to go to graduate school and live a full life. I really have no doubts that anyone can get over this with the proper support and state of mind.


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## sneaker (Feb 14, 2009)

Thanks for the encouraging words. You are absolutely right, my state of mind is fuelling my DR. I have a long way to go but I really believe now that if I get my head right, anxiety-wise, I can overcome this. Glad to hear you are feeling better.


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## Adem (Jul 27, 2008)

i feel the same way. i realized fear is the biggest reason keeping it around. the less you fear it the better you are, and just going out there and living is what makes you forget about it and makes it die off, ive been dealin with dp/dr for about a year now, i havent fully recovered but thanks to lexapro i use for anxiety and the right state of mind it has drastically lowered...


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## brokenheart (Mar 13, 2009)

Do you have any tips to recovery?

And congrats for finding your way through DP


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