# 'Nother Newbie



## Inga (Jun 5, 2006)

Hello all. It's nice, if not a bit overwhelming, to find such a large online support group for derealization!

I'm Inga, a 22 year old girl who has suffered from this weird condition for at least 11 years. I have the 'nothing is real' feeling all the time- it never leaves me. I know it is deeply tied in with my anxieties, although oddly it seemed to strike a few years before my anxiety disorder got really bad.

I remember the day I felt derealization for the first time. Nothing set it off, as far as I can remember. It was a normal school day. I was about 11 years old, maybe 10, and had just arrived at school. And I quickly discovered that things didn't look right to me. The world felt somehow 'darker'. My friends faces didn't look real. Nothing looked real.

Later, at assembly, I became nauseous, and had to go home. For a long time I thought I was just sick, but in retrospect, that must have been my first panic attack. But it seems a bit odd to me that the derealization set off the panic attack, and not the other way around. Isn't it usually that you start to panic, and THEN the derealization sets in? I'm still confused by what set it off (the derealizaton) in the first place. I don't remember being at all anxious that day. Nothing was wrong.

Anyway, my sense of reality has been 'off' ever since that day. My mum suffers from the same thing, and although she feels it most of the time, very occasionally the foggy veil will 'lift' for her- albeit for a short amount of time.

I've not read much on this site yet, so I'm sure I'm just echoing what has been said before, but I was eager to post and make myself known here. I've lived with this for so long, and no doctor or therapist has been able to help me. Mostly, they don't know what the hell I'm talking about. Very frustrating!

I'm currently suffering from social phobia, although it has gotten better over the years, and also have depression. I'm on Aropax (Paxil in the US), but think I need to change meds, since the Aropax doesn't seem to be working as well as it used to.

So, here I am. Hope to find out even more about my condition here, and maybe get to know some of you. Thanks.

-Inga


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## frony (Apr 2, 2006)

Hi and welcome 

I think that depersonalization is still rather a big mystery to all of us, so any speculations as to what causes it, and if it can start "from nothing" are just unsupported ideas, and we could speak about this forever on and on, and get ...well nowhere.

Anyway, My DP started off fully thanks to marijuana, but I have had short episodes of unreality before since about when I was 10yrs old, which also came apparently out of nowhere.

And finally, It must be great to have at least someone close to you, who understands you fully, and who shares the same problem, especially when it is your mother. Though on the other I can imagine how hard it is to know that you mom suffers from this also almost her whole life, when you alone suffer from it, and how flower* it is.

Anyway, take care....


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## Inga (Jun 5, 2006)

Hi Frony, thanks for the welcome!


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