# med zombie



## sleepingbeauty (Aug 18, 2004)

a lil update on mois...

now that im back in the med game, im finding it really hard to communicate with anyone. ive pretty much shut myself off from the world completely. i have no desire to do anything at all, and ive turned into a pitiful pile of poo. but it gets better.

last night i took my very first dose of seroquel.. per my current psychiatrists request. my primary care and my psychologist both told me to take the drug, and i took the boxes but didnt start actually dosing because i was already on 2 meds as it was 150 mgs of welbutrin and slowly going through the process of weening off lexapro. right now im down to about half a mg of that.. so i suppose its ok to start on the seroquel especially because ive had 3 different doctors tell me to take it(which makes me very curious as to why seroquel is the 'in vogue' drug of choice in these parts. hmmmm)

anyhow so i took the little eensy weensy pilly poo last night. here comes the fun part. this morning i literally felt like i was on black tar heroin. my arms and legs and head felt like they were too heavy to hold up. even my tongue was loling out of my mouth. i couldnt form words. the only desire i had was to curl up into a ikle ball and sleep for the next 2000 years. but i couldnt cause i had my psychologist apointment. i told her how i felt and my concerns and she said that is a common side effect and should wear off in a few days or so.

now i come to the question and answer portion of my rant. for anyone who has taken seroquel or a similar drug.. does this zombieness go away at all? this really concerns me because im already a zombie enough just by breathing pure air. i dont need any help in that department.

i have more fun stuff to talk about but ill make a new post for that. this post is purely drug related. thanks in advance for any replies.


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## dakotajo (Aug 10, 2004)

Youre giving yourself a chemical lobotomy(literally) when you take an anti-psychotic. The use these same drugs in animal tranquilizer darts for Christ sake. How on Gods earth can that possibly help anybody unless you are TRULY psychotic(which I dont believe you are). I took it to help sleep during severe benzo withdrawal and it made me feel like I was a walking corpse. Never,never again!! d take that fucking crap and flush it down the fucking toilet.

Joe


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## Guest (Sep 1, 2004)

I wonder why your doctors advised you to take an anti psychotic.
There must be a reason to it. There must be a really really valid reason for prescribing an anti psychotic.

If there is no such reason (I guess there's none) then it must be you who has a very valid reason for taking such a med (I guess there is none either).

So why the hell are you taking an anti psychotic?!
If it is just because your doctors said so, try to get rid of it as fast as possible.

I'm with d-jo on that one, don't kid yourself, get that stuff out of your system.

If you have dp(with anxiety) and you want to take something other than what you've been on so far, take an antidepressant with sedating properties (= no ssri cause they are stimulating).

If you aren't psychotic, don't touch anti psychotics!


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## Guest (Sep 1, 2004)

I am not against the anti-psychotics, but they do make you a zombie sometimes.

The main thing that strikes me as well...odd is that you're still taking Wellbutrin?? It activates dopamine, and the anti-psychotic deactivates dopamine. Odd to combine those meds. Makes no sense to me.

If someone has the need for an anti-psychotic, the LAST thing they need is Wellbutrin. And likewise, if Wellbutrin is helping you, it's almost a guarantee that you won't like the effects of an anti-psychotic.

I am not a doctor as we know, but IF I was, I'd suggest something like Depakote for you (or Lamictal) - something that could level out your moods and curb bursts of anger, etc...without sacrificing functioning as an anti-psychotic might do.

Peace,
J


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## Guest (Sep 1, 2004)

damn that sucks

ive started weining off of Respirdal, it hasn't done anything for me, im sick of meds, eventually im gonna wein off of Klonopin to. Im starting to think that meds can't help me & that i can only help me, well along with some help from my therapist.


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

i took an antipsycotic once ! i was told 'you are not psycotic but these tablets have an anti anxiety effect....i was brain fucked for about a week


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## sleepingbeauty (Aug 18, 2004)

hey jc.. i read something you just posted about Kpin and how its helped you... isnt it an antipsy?

anyways im really saddened that my psychiatrist is sh!tty. i can see this now from these responses. but since shes the type of person that would get pissed if i told her i didnt want to take it, then what do i do? its not like i can perscibe MYSELF these meds. i have to do what the doctor says because i dont have the means to find the perfect doctor that will do what I tell them to. they all tell me that im bipolar when i know that im not. i dont relate to bipolarism at all. so why the f#ck are they telling me this? i really feel like my hands are tied cause i want to find the right med to help me and i know that i have ADD. so why wont they just treat me for that and stop making up their own diagnosis for me? this is so aggrivating.


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

as far as i know klonopin is mainly used for the treatment of epilepsy...but i took respiridol once and it knocked me stupid


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## Guest (Sep 2, 2004)

When I read these posts, it concerns me a bit that some of the posters say things in such a matter of fact way, when in fact, in it only the opinion of the person posting. I guess I'm not used to this style as I moderate on another site for post partum depression and we really discourage that type of advice.

Recovery is a very individual thing. We must all live with ourselves and decide what is the best road to follow. Some of us have had horrid relults from meds. Others, it's been the saving grace. Most meds start with really bad side effects to start until your body gets used to them. From what I've read, if you have no side effects, it may not even be the drug that will work effectively for you.

I will add that I was totally against drugs before I went into this hellish dp/dr. I had a home birth, lived a pretty natural lifestyle, go to a naturopath, etc, etc. I have had my own personal battles with excepting that I need to take meds. I have tried some natural ways (herbs, hormones, talk therapy, homeopathic meds, strict no sugar diet) but to no avail. I realize that there are many more things that are natural to try but after white knuckling for months trying to find an answer, I finally surrendered to taking an anti depressant, Zoloft. I also nursed my baby while on this which has actually been the hardest part for me to except and deal with.

These choices are hard ones, to say the least. I certainly don't think that a Dr.s word is "GOD". That is why they call them "practicing". But to tell someone to NOT take something and flush it just seems to be out of line. Maybe that is okay on this forum but I now here sleeping beauty placing a whole lot of doubt on her Dr. Good intentions here, I'm sure. We are all just doing the best we can and trying to find an answer.

I hope I haven't offended anyone.

Carla


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## Guest (Sep 2, 2004)

I want to add that I think we ought to be very careful about diagnosing someone that we don't even know and have never met. We are NOT Dr.s. To tell Sleeping Beauty that you don't think she is bi-polar is speculative at best.

I'm not saying that you are bi-polar sleeping beauty. You don't feel you are and you may not be. But I don't feel that anyone here can give you a diagnoses.

Carla


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## GavinD (Aug 10, 2004)

Well 7Carla, I HAVE met sleepingbeauty and she is absolutely NOT bipolar, I'm 100% certain of that. From what she's told me, it sounds like the people prescribing these medications dont seem to know what theyre talking about because they dont yet understand the person theyre trying to treat. And this is what sickens me, because to diagnose a mental illness, the only real way to do it is for them to LISTEN to the patient over time instead of coming up the answers as if by magic in a split second to save their own precious time and effort. This is my advice to everybody - do not have blind faith in people just because theyre authority figures or so called proffessionals. Educate yourself in everyway you can so you can see if you're being fobbed off and if you don't like what decisions people are making for you, you are entitled to say so.

g


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## Guest (Sep 2, 2004)

I agree with Gavin 100 per cent, although I think Carla raises good points, but I want to add this.

Agree totally that no one can diagnose anyone else without knowing them. Here's the problem. Just because a therapist meets someone and talks with them a bit, that does not mean they have a CLUE who that person is. On this Board, Sleeping Beauty has been around for a long time...I've gotten to know her first hand from her own thoughts and actions. We surmise knowledge about people here based on what might be much more authentic (unguarded) behavior and sharing than any psychiatrist would EVER see unless they were in long term therapy with the person.

A visit to a shrink will only "tell" the shrink as much as the patient is willing for them to know. We are guarded, defended, scared witless and still desperate for help. Those visits with the doctor are muddled at best, and misleading at worst.

All therapists in long term treatment will say that about 50 per cent of their patients turn out to be VERY different than they first thought. There is an "uh, oh..." moment, lol...for therapists where they often realize they underestimated the person's ability to regress or they failed to see an underlying pathology. That is par for the course, not a failing of the shrink. That's why Long Term therapy is a very good way to make real changes. We can only hide ourselves for so long if we're in a close relationship with a good shrink.

So, no I'm not a doctor, but I have as much knowledge as many therapists who practice and I have the added benefit of having a "playing field" here to really get to know people who post regularly. All that said, ol' Sleepy ain't bipolar.

And EVERYONE should be VERY cautious regarding any diagnosis (even one of mine, grin grin) that does not feel right to you. With a physical ailment, the doctor can know you "have" something that you might not have any idea you have. But with psychological symptoms, if after hearing a diagnosis, and reading about it and learning the descriptions of symptoms and behavior and thoughts...if we don't think it fits, it is probably an incorrect diagnosis.

Peace,
Janine


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## Guest (Sep 2, 2004)

I myself doubt that the doctors out there have good intentions.
The only "good" intentions they have is not to ruin their own reputation.
I think that those so called professionals are far too hard boiled to really care of the patient.

One has to be very attentive to protect oneself from abuse when one has a mental illness and is therefore vulnerable and not well enough educated about mental health to know that there is great potential for damage.

My health was much more damaged by so called mental health professionals than I would have been able to make me sick by myself in a lifetime.
And I was even lucky compared to what other sufferers told me about their treatment (not from this site).

I have also taken prescription medication and I suffered a great deal cause of that.
I never want to go through the medication process again and I can only warn others to take care. BECAUSE MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONALS DON'T TAKE CARE OF THEIR PATIENTS. And if they do, then not enough.
And if it was only me on the whole planet who was badly treated by about 7 professionals, it is enough already.
It is not until now that I have found a type of medication that helps because I ignore all advice from professionals cause nothing ever worked but made everything much worse!

Nobody can predict how a patient will react to certain pills and so all the "expertise" is only guesswork. The patient is much more able to choose the right medication for himself if he was well educated or if mental health profs stopped behaving like know-it-alls and would educate the patient or would be at least honest with them.

But does this happen? NO, WHICH BECOMES VERY OBVIOUS IN SLEEPINGBEAUTY 'S POST!
Therefore I don't hesitate to throw my opinion onto the bord, CAUSE IT HAS TO BE SAID THAT NOT EVERYTHING IS SO HARMLESS AS THE MENTAL HEALTH WORKERS WANT US TO BELIEVE!
And I am not paranoid, I am just someone who was very harmed by people who "just want to help".(That's what a therapist said when I was addressing what exactly caused the damage.She just ignored all the concern cause no matter what she does to the patient, everything is good cause she only wants to help!?)

SO ALL PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO ARE DEALING WITH MENTAL HEALTH WORKERS OR MEDICATION: TAKE CARE AND LISTEN TO YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IF ANYTHING DOESN'T FEEL RIGHT, GO AWAY!!! WHEN IN DOUBT DO NOTHING!!!

I am really serious about that!


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## dakotajo (Aug 10, 2004)

Nobody knows "you" better than "you". So what if they give a diagnosis? You could just as well wipe you ass with it. I dont believe there is such thing as an authority when it comes to the current mental health system. If you have a lot of faith in it, you will eventually be very disappointed. I dont think shrinks and therapists should even be considered doctors. Their field of "expertise" is based on a bunch of unproven theories with almost no scientific basis. Its scary how much power these people have and how poorly they are governed.

Joe


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## Guest (Sep 2, 2004)

I am going to repeat this because I think it's VERY IMPORTANT. This is something that all of the knowledgeable folks here agree on - whether we are pro-therapy, anti-therapy, pro-psychiatrist, pro-meds, or anti-meds....this is a REALITY:

NObody should accept a diagnosis of mental symptoms that doesn't FEEL right.

Naturally, if you get a diagnosis and don't really know enough about what the term means, you need to read. You need to find out what that term means and how it is described and what other patients with that diagnosis tend to feel and think.

If after all that, you don't think the diagnosis fits, it is an INCORRECT diagnosis.

This is not like something wrong with your heart or liver, where the doctor KNOWS more than you..."but I don't feel like I have heart trouble..." isn't worth much if the doctor sees the evidence of heart disease.

Mental symptoms are different. You MUST on some level agree with the diagnosis after you've learned enough about it to judge. If you don't agree, find another doctor.

Peace,
Janine


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## GavinD (Aug 10, 2004)

Janine is absolutely right. Diagnosis should come after long term experience with the patient so that inappropriate (and potentially DANGEROUS) drugs are not prescribed. That is not to say that ANY drugs should not be prescribed straight away. It's clear to me, because I'm close to her, that sleepingbeauty's main problem is depression. Not manic depression, just depression. So, by all means try an antidepressant....which is what they did at first. Escitalopram (lexapro) which made sense becuse its one of the newer forms that are supposedly more selective and have less side effects. But what logic is there in NOT monitoring the effects of that on its own over time but instead adding another drug to the mix?? How are they even gonna tell if that second drug's beneficial because the affects of the first drug could be clouding that!! It's absurd and this sort of thing makes me furious, because I hate bad logic in all people, let alone people who are meant to be smart. And especially when it's affecting someone I love and someone who doesnt have the energy or the fight in them at the moment to deal with this bullsh1t.

g


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

7Carla said:


> When I read these posts, it concerns me a bit that some of the posters say things in such a matter of fact way, when in fact, in it only the opinion of the person posting.


And i hope i don't offend you, 7Carla, when i point out that when someone posts on a thread, it is implicitly assumed that it is *their* opinion. Rarely do i go to forums where people are vicariously posting someone else's opinion. i mean, that would just be silly.

I agree with you that people shouldn't "diagnose" others without knowing much about them, but on a forum such as this one, where many people, including SB have disclosed their most intimate fears, i think we have a better idea of what might help her than some doctor who not only knows less about her but also evidently doesn't listen when she tries to tell her something. Granted, we're not doctors here, but psychiatric medicine isn't exactly rocket science, and it's mostly subjective anyway...i would trust the advice and opinions of some people on this board before i would trust the advice of a half-hearted psychiatrist whose only experience with dp/dr is the three sentence blurb written about it in the DSMR.

s.


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## Guest (Sep 3, 2004)

This is a great and interesting discussion for sure! I find it amazing how different forums can be. I guess I've never really been involved in any but the one I moderate for. So, that has been my learning tool as to how to go about questions and answers. We tend to air on the side of the Dr. I think it may be a liability thing, too. I also have seen women who, when they finally stick to a med, greatly improve. There are those, too, that keep trying different things and still aren't getting the relief they'd hoped for. There isn't much alternative discussion. It comes up but frankly knowone knows much about it so it doesn't get much action.

I have thought about starting an alternative approach to PPD website just to see what happens. I'm VERY intersted in things outside "the box" that help. I have a very poor trust in Dr.s in general. But when this thing hit me with a ton of bricks, I couldn't even function. My brain just couldn't make a decision. So, I went to a friend that is a Dr. and home schooler and a bit alternative. He knew me personally. He put me on Zoloft right away. I was so desperate for help out of my pain that I took it without any research. I decided to "trust" in him. I really had no other choice! It did help apparently. Anyway, my story is VERY involved and long.

I do think we need to be our own best advocates. I have many many books on Anxiety and medication, herbs, homeopathy, etc. I read all I can so that I can determine what is best for me. But when you are in the grips of this thing, like I was and I'm sure many of you are or have been, the old knoggin' just doesn't want to work. So, unless you have someone that can be your personal advicate, you gotta put your faith somewhere or you're screwed.

I love this site!!! I'm new to it, obviously...LOL ( I hope like heck you're laughing with me here). I really hope that I haven't rubbed anyone the wrong way. I am open to all opinions. If this is how this forum is run, I think I get it. I guess you are all just more open to go outside the norm and let it all hang out. That is a very cool thing.

Carla


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## hhhhhhhhhh (Nov 30, 2006)

It's 4:25 in the morning and I've got to get up relatively early tomorrow, so I didn't have time to read each and every response to the initial post, only the first few. But I'd still have a bit of info I'd like to share at the risk of someone already having said something similar, in which case do forgive me.

I was on seroquel for the better part of 3 years. I was never and am not psychotic. I was taking 100mg of seroquel each night before bed for severe and persistant insomnia. Seroquel is an antipsychotic, yes, but only at dosages at or above 800mg (if my memory serves me correctly). Any lower than that and you've just got yourself a powerful sedative. Now, it's true that it affects the brain differently than, say, benzos, but at the same time, doses lower than 800mg don't affect the brain the same way as at a full-blown antipsychotic dose either. This must be kept in consideration. Also, the brain chemistry of someone who is truly psychotic is vastly different than from someone with depression, anxiety, etc., and therefore add yet another ingredient in the medley of how a certain med at a certain dose will affect you.

That said, seroquel made me a fucking zombie for years. The day I stopped taking it I woke up and it felt as though I had _woken up_. I was more attentive in class, participated more, and was, at times, actually interested. Mind you, my dp/dr started many a year before I started on seroquel, and it's still as bad as ever now--over six months since I quit taking it--but I can say for certain that it by no means helped or made my fight to reconnect with reality any easier.

My point: If your doctor says this symptom should disappear within a few days, wait a few days. Hell, wait a whole damn week to be sure. He/she could be right and you'll be thriving in no time. But if not, don't hold out hope that it'll get better in a month, six months, a year or two... Request a change in med. There are so many fucking drugs out there being massed-produced by company after company, and that is something you should take advantage of. If a med gives you side-effects that honestly bother or worry you--and that don't go away after the allotted period of time--, then drop it and demand to try another.


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## comfortably numb (Mar 6, 2006)

The anti-psychotic dose of seroquel is usually between 400-800mg's a day. Sometimes less. The dose used to treat bipolar is about the same. Alot of it depend's on how an individual react's to the drug though. Some people need more of the drug some people need less.

I take anywhere between 100-300mg's for a manic episode. I stopped taking the stuff everyday after i got on the mood stabilizer depakote. Depakote has done wonder's to even out my mood's and it doesent make me wanna eat all the time like seroquel does.

That was my biggest complaint about seroquel the stuff made me so hungry. Now i just save it for emergencies when i feel a manic episode coming on or a depressive episode. It work's pretty good for my depresson as well.

I could see how it could make a person who didnt have either schizophrenia or bipolar a total zombie. People who suffer from these illnesses just have a slightly different brain chemistry. I guess that's why the stuff never made me too sedated.


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## Guest (Dec 28, 2006)

*7Carla* Posted: Fri Sep 03, 2004 3:44 am - *omistebis* Posted: Tue Dec 26, 2006 9:41 am

Notice the different? Omistebis how long did it take you to search for this old post? And why?


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## comfortably numb (Mar 6, 2006)

^^^ I didnt notice that till you pointed that out. That's pretty dense of me. The post's are over 2 year's apart.


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## Guest (Dec 28, 2006)

comfortably numb said:


> ^^^ I didnt notice that till you pointed that out. *That's pretty dense of me.* The post's are over 2 year's apart.


YEs you should be ashamed of yourself!... lol "not" it's a good thing you didn't notice it, you'd have to be DR/DP to have cared =P.


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