# The Bomb in the Brain - The Effects of Child Abuse



## Ivan Hawk

I've felt for a very long time in my life that childhood abuse has played a strong factor in the depersonalization I've experienced over the past couple of years now and growing more aware of the details in this information has been relieving and comforting to understand and work with. It all bottoms down to how you generally felt most of the time and what made you feel that way. Facing the the source of the pain has helped me a lot these past few years. Some people didn't really have a lot of abuse, some had some, some had "a lot" and some are institutionalized unfortunately from less common severe cases. So I present this interesting 4 part series on the shocking effects of childhood abuse and how it is effecting the world. I'm having trouble finding the 4th part of the video series and believe it to still be in production at this current time. The video quotes, "After you watch this video, you will never look at the world the same way again." Let me know what you think. All the statistics come from clearly stated well established scientific sources. Enjoy









The Bomb in the Brain - The Effects of Child Abuse Part 1


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## Ivan Hawk

The Effects of Child Abuse Part 2 - The Freedomain Radio Interview with Dr Felitti


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## Ivan Hawk

The Bomb in the Brain - The Biology of Violence: The Effects of Child Abuse Part 3


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## Rebekah

Ivan Hawk said:


> The Bomb in the Brain - The Biology of Violence: The Effects of Child Abuse Part 3


Hello Ivan,
I will check these videos out very soon, thank you. I feel strongly also that childhood abuse causes DP, or makes those vulnerable to it get it. Were these supposed to be links? I know I am not yet able to post links since I am still considered a newbie. On this forum, one must wait for the go ahead to post links. I'm not sure when that happens? I see now in this reply that they are on youtube. I'll find them.


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## Rebekah

Everyone, please take this short 9 question test at the ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) Study website: acestudy.org It helps to determine if any of us have been abused as children below the age of 18. I "flunked" the test with 7 "yes" answers. Then, go to youtube and watch these videos of the Bomb in the Brain. You can refer to your score while watching the videos. I didn't see the entire interview in part 2, but watched both parts 1 and 3. Very informative. There is a short segment in there about dissociative disorders and childhood abuse. It was interesting to understand one point that an infant who is not bonded properly with its mother may in the future develop anxiety/fear/violence and other problems. The scientific data shows that brain damage will occur in the baby's brain from chemicals released from mom's "toxic" (bad) moods transferred to the infant. This could leave the person open to lifelong psychological difficulties, including DP. I know that I was neglected as an infant because my parents told me so! My mother told me repeatedly that she tried to abort me--talk about bad chemical transfer. Also, I was parentally emotionally abused as a teen. Then I smoked the weed, and my already "damaged"(?) baby brain caused me to have a DP/anxiety/GAD persistent problem. I'll keep searching until I uncover the riddle of DP. P.S. Brain damage as a child doesn't mean we are scarred or damaged for life: Modern research shows that brain cells (neurons) can regrow and regenerate and we can be made whole again--that's the good news!


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## York

I haven't really watched these vid's, sorry. But I have to say, the kids in these studies, as I've seen another program on it, are not kids who walk and talk like normal kids. They are so damaged that they have no language, can't walk or eat etc. We are talking severe neglect from infancy, and severe brain damage as a result. I don't want people to go around thinking this is "them" in any way as it's not. And it's true what rebekah said, even kids who have grown up under these extreme conditions will heal with the right care over time, although they might never be fully functional.

Trauma is not a ticking bomb in your mind either, it's just something that has shaped you, and you need to re-learn how to think about the world, or yourself, to take away the stress/anxiety you will have in certain situations.


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## York

Oh, and I just read a study, maybe it was Norwegian I don't know, which showed that the umbilical cord blocks out more of toxins than one used to think, meaning the baby is very protected. Imagine what the world would be like if the fetus was as fragile as some people nowadays think! I know it's a very popular belief in the USA that EVERYTHING the mom does during pregnancy affects the baby, I even heard this one "scientist" say that stress-hormones in the fetus's blood would make it a larger more muscular kid, as it was in constant survival-mode in the womb..! 
It's also a very dangerous belief as it actually drives some women to have an abortion, as they think they've somehow damaged their child (no kidding).

We've all been affected somehow I guess, but look at your life OUTSIDE of the womb, and I am pretty sure that is where you'll find most of your answers


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## Ivan Hawk

Interesting replies and thank you for the responses. Very informative and sounds reasonable comparing the information to what I do know about some of the biological and psychological factors involved in children.


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## alegoribar

Thank you so much for this videos. I do believe my DP/DR was caused by my early traumatic experiences most caused by my stressful home environment.


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## Rebekah

It's interesting that my mother does admit that she was highly stressed while pregnant with me and I did turn out to be a muscular, larger built woman, not really fat, but strong and very able and aggressive in sports as a youth--an overcomer mentality. I believe that a person can heal from most difficulties in life, get a truthful perspective on a problem, get closure which can then bring joy.


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## m&m

I just finished watching the first and will definitely return to see the rest. I would say I'm no less that a 5 but maybe as high as 7 depending on some unsubstantiated accusations.

Thank you for your contribution.


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## m&m

http://www.youtube.c...h?v=S16EHfKRLfc

Found part 4 which took an interesting direction, should we have another poll, something on politcs?

From what I've read in pages from "Feeling Unreal" available from google, DP *hypo*-activates the limbic region which would include the amygdala.


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## m&m

From the book "Feeling Unreal" page 110.

"Another relevant part of the cortex is the medial prefrontal cortex, which is situated inside the frontal lobes. The medial prefrontal cortex has important connections to the limbic, or "emotional," part of the brain, playing a crucial role in modulating and dampening our emotional responses. In some psychiatric disorders characterized by high states of anxiety and arousal, it appears that this area of the prefrontal cortex is hypoactive and is not adequately inhibiting the very active amygdala and the other limbic structures. Conversely, one could predict that the hypoemotionality of depersonalization disorder might involve an inverse pattern: heightened prefrontal activity with greater limbic inhibition."

I would be interest to hear others take on this last video.

Parts of it fit well with the "model" of my OBE.
What I think of as my conscious mind, the part we association will free will, was not really involved in what I was actually doing.

The "sub-conscious" was processing the 11 million pieces of information and acting on it, while the "conscious" completely separated as dealing with the 40, if that many. The only change was my perception. If I had not OBE'd, none of the events would have changed, I would have done the same thing.

This make me think we have to change how we view ourself as it relates to the brain. the conscious part which would seem to relate mostly to whom I am as person, cannot be the whole of me.

Free will is possible, but looking at the world we see the vast majority follow there childhood training.


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## Ivan Hawk

The Bomb in the Brain Part 5 - A Postscript and Prescription






Official Youtube Playlist: The Bomb in the Brain - The Effects of Child Abuse - 5 Videos


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## Guest

I'll have to view the videos, but I know from other reading, and I can list some books, that abuse is "stress" or "allostatic load" that can and indeed does affect the brain in many ways.

I scored a 5 on that ACE test and am not surprised. I know I came from a seriously crazy family. I had no love/support at all. Both of my parents, though high functioning doctors, were mentally ill and I was an only child.

Somene mentioned that a child exposed to all of these factors would be unable to speak or function. That may be true in extreme cases of abuse, but considering the wretched lives of many children worldwide --say those who live in squalor or without parents, etc. -- girls treated like garbage, etc. abuse seems to be relatively universal ... it simply takes different forms and has different results.

Also, animals are abused ... all types ... but some can be rehabilitated, some not -- some animals have to be put down because of their abuse -- they cannot function "socially." I also just found an amazing article in Discovery that animals commit suicide -- it would be that they know something is wrong with themselves, or are "mentally ill."

What I believe is in my case, I had a predisposition to dissociate/be anxious ... that was my nature. But since I was born, I was unwanted essentially, save as an object to be "shown off" for some time. What saved me was my private school -- 2.5 years old until graduation. That was my family and my siblings. Without that school, to be honest, I dont know if I'd be alive today. Not sure.

At any rate, if you are beaten down emotionally, and live in a constant state of anxiety it stands to reason this can affect the developing brain. We are shaped by Nature and Nurture.

Some books I've read .... "Does Stress Damage The Brain?: Understanding Trauma-Related Disorders from a Mind-Body Perspective -- J. Douglas Bremner, M.D.
Mind, Stress and Emotions: The New Science of Mood -- Gene Wallenstein, Ph.D., The End Of Stress as We Know It -- Bruce McEwen ... and all of these books refer to stress and abuse is a heavy stressor on a child as affecting brain function and morphology, and all deal with the hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenal axis ... and this comes up again and again and again in studies. It's constant anxiety/fight/flight, etc. If anyone/thing is subjected to that for a long period of time, there would have to be an effect on the brain.

The question is, how do you "undo it." For me it has been very difficult as the craziness in my family didn't stop when I left home, and I was drawn back in for variouis reasons as I was an only child who had to "pick up the pieces" of endless messes.

I am depressed, anxious, and DP/DR, and to be honest, I don't recall NOT being anxious and depressed, and the DP/DR came early and became chronic ... and I am 51.

I have a lot of coping strategies and meds, etc. that have helped. One HUGE thing was to be outright open about my illness, no more "secrets."

There are also many good books/autobiographies discussing abuse. One of my favorites which is chilling to say the least is "A Hole In The World: An American Boyhood" by Richard Rhodes (famous author). He attributes surviving his childhood on the close bond he had with his brother -- they shared the trauma.

I'll certainly look at the videos.

It's pretty clear that prolonged abuse can cause depression, anxiety, and anxiety can produce DP/DR. BUT, some people are born into very healthy families and STILL have the same symptoms. And some children can be severely abused and manage to have tremendous "resiliency" and may have psychological problems but NOT PSYCHIATRIC SYMPTOMS. There is a difference between psychological issues (such as difficulty with relationships vs. SYMPTOMS that force one to seek help as they limit one's functioning.

Humans are so complex there is no one easy answer.

I'll look at the videos. My guess is they echo many studies on stress in children. However, what is astounding is some children are born with a mental illness. I have now been following the cases of babies who have hallucinations -- childhood schizophrenia, bipolar, depression, that is NOT caused by the environment which is loving and healthy.

Nature/Nurture ... I don't know when that will be figured.

Cheers, 
D

Tried a new font there ... curious how it looks.


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## Guest

PS, thanks to the OP for sharing the vids.


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## Guest

Just started watching the fist video and the problem I have is that _*abuse causes violence*_. _*This is different from saying abuse causes dysfuncion*_ ... various forms of dysfunction. Also, humans are inherently violent. Or rather, we are inherently self-serving in order to survive. Many criminals are not mentally ill. But many mentally ill individuals (schizoprhenics, seriously ill bipolar individuals, etc.) abuse substances and are arrested for petty crimes as they are self-medicating and cannot properly function.

I'm a tad worried about the emphasis here.

I'll view more later.

Thanks again.


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## m&m

*Here is some information on the source of the material.*
*
*
*Drew Westen* (Andrew Westen) is Professor in the Departments of Psychology and Psychiatry at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia. He received his undergraduate degree (B.A.) from Harvard University, an M.A. in Social and Political Thought from the University of Sussex (England), and a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from the University of Michigan, where he taught introductory psychology for several years.



Link: Drew Weston
http://www.psychsystems.net/


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## Guest

m&m said:


> *Here is some information on the source of the material.*
> *
> *
> *Drew Westen* (Andrew Westen) is Professor in the Departments of Psychology and Psychiatry at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia. He received his undergraduate degree (B.A.) from Harvard University, an M.A. in Social and Political Thought from the University of Sussex (England), and a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from the University of Michigan, where he taught introductory psychology for several years.
> 
> 
> 
> Link: Drew Weston
> http://www.psychsystems.net/


Well, I can't argue with the man's credentials, and I myself am a Wolverine (U. of M.)







I live right near campus ... I have to watch the videos to make a proper comment. There is a lot of dissension about violence, addiction, free will, etc. I'm curious that he has a background in social and political theory -- this is looking at things from a cultural POV, at statistics. The detree in Clinical Psychology is interesting. I was just concerned of the abuse leads to VIOLENCE ... that sort of took me aback.

No worries, I will watch the videos, but one at a time.

Best,
D


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## Guest

Damn, now the first video won't work here or on YouTube itself.


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## m&m

Dreamer* said:


> Well, I can't argue with the man's credentials, and I myself am a Wolverine (U. of M.)
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> I live right near campus ... I have to watch the videos to make a proper comment. There is a lot of dissension about violence, addiction, free will, etc. I'm curious that he has a background in social and political theory -- this is looking at things from a cultural POV, at statistics. The detree in Clinical Psychology is interesting. I was just concerned of the abuse leads to VIOLENCE ... that sort of took me aback.
> 
> No worries, I will watch the videos, but one at a time.
> 
> Best,
> D


Drew Westen is only referenced in Part 4 which is dealing with politics and the way the brain reacts. 
The ACE Study is an ongoing collaboration between the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and Kaiser Permanente. http://www.acestudy.org/


As far as I know, the videos are an independent presentation of information from these and only sources.
Any conclusions beyond the source material would be their own. That why I have been checking the sources.


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## Guest

Well, I watched the first video and find it rather misleading. I will continue to watch the others, but the facts/statistics don't seem to reflect other facts we KNOW about mental illnesses -- schizprhenia, bipolar, clinical depression, OCD, other anxiety disorders, etc.

This implies that ACE, or childhood abuse virtually guarantees MENTAL ILLNESS, and that is not the case. There are many individuals from healthy homes, who can become mentally ill.

There is a very misleading "graphic" -- shown too briefly, of an abused child's brain, the a non abused child's brain. The comparison is impossible. A child with that small of a head circumference at the same age as a healthy child ... not possible. There would not be a significant MORPHOLOGICAL -- literal BRAIN SIZE (externally) as the result of child abuse. Circuitry, hormonal problems (HPA Axis from chronic chaos causing anxiety, yes), not such a dramatic difference. A child of three with a brain size about 1/3? the size of a normal three year old ... not possible. The graphic is shown briefly, looks shocking, but isn't possible.

MENTAL ILLNESS -- SYMPTOMS that are disabling -- are universal, and can occur in abused or non-abused individuals. A child can come from a completely loving home and still have depression, suicidal thinking, anxiety, OCD, any of this stuff. You don't have to be abused to have a severe debilitating mental illness. This also implies that childhood abuse is "new." It's not. Neither is mental illness.

PSYCHOLOGICAL problems can result, but not actual mental illness, save probably depression and some anxiety disorders.

Violence is not directly tied to MENTAL ILLNESS/NEUROLOGICAL illness. Individuals who are dysfunctional are frequently victims of violence. Those who commit violence are sociopaths, or yes, some CAN be seriously mentally ill, but they have not been treated properly.

ALSO, individuals with mental illness SELF-MEDICATE ... so drug use increases if the individual isn't diagnosed, untreated. An individual can also engage in other behaviors which indude "euphoria" -- self harm/cutting, shoplifting, sexual promiscuity, etc. THIS IS HELPING THE INDIVIDUAL ESCAPE AND COPE -- this is DUAL DIAGNOSIS. If the addiction is treated, the mental illness is still there. And it can be treated.

Memory -- more and more is being understood re: memory, but forgetting the details of one's youth can happen in healthy people. I was and ACE 5 and remember every detail of my childhood, teen years. Also, individuals don't seem to repress/hide from bad memories, they are ashamed, don't want to think/talk about what has happened BUT THEY HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN.

The claim that ACE individuals hallucinate more ... that's just not right. Abuse does NOT cause illnesses that result in hallucinations. Schizoprhenia, pychosis are KNOWN NEUROLOGICAL disorders that one has a predisposition to.

Take 20 years off of someone's life span as the result of abuse is also incorrect. Being mentally ILL can affect life span for a number of reasons. The life span loss is the MENTAL ILLNESS, especially if it isn't treated.

I could carry on. But so far, I see this as being misleading. A lot of statistics which are misleading. And as for changing parental behavior -- I'm curious what the solution is. My parents were both mentally ill. Their behavior could not be changed. I am also addicted to nothing, am not violent, am 51 years old and in good health, I have a clear memory of the past, I don't hallucinate. I had a predisposition to dissociate, be anxious, and clinically depressed. This situation was EXACERBATED by my upbringing, but I can see that I could very well have been born this way. Mental illness runs in families. So does addictive behaviors such as alcoholism.

I'm concerned about what the "cultural/political" solution to all of this will be in the next videos. But I'm already having problems with this.

Tired. Time for bed.
IMHO.
D

See http://www.nami.org for more accurate figures, and for good outcomes re: mental illness with proper intervention and treatment. Granted, individuals from dysfunctional homes (such as mine don't always get good treatment for obvious reasons), however many HEALTHY, LOVING homes have children with mental disorders including schizoprhenia (in childhood), autism, bipolar, etc. The "BIG" diseases. These are MEDICAL.

Also again, I don't know WHERE they got this, but abuse does NOT cause hallucinations. That would be saying that abuse causes psychosis. We already know that individuals with psychosis have a clear MEDICAL disorder they were BORN with. Environment can affect treatment, coping, etc.

That brain comparison was extremely misleading, right off the bat.


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## Guest

m&m said:


> Drew Westen is only referenced in Part 4 which is dealing with politics and the way the brain reacts.
> The ACE Study is an ongoing collaboration between the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and Kaiser Permanente. http://www.acestudy.org/
> 
> 
> As far as I know, the videos are an independent presentation of information from these and only sources.
> Any conclusions beyond the source material would be their own. That why I have been checking the sources.


M&M -- ah, that makes sense. I'm glad you are doing actual FIRST HAND, PRIMARY SOURCE research on this. As noted above, after watching the first video, I was disappointed and sus.

I CERTAINLY believe, as I've said before, any childhood abuse has negative effects, in many ways -- CLEARLY in a psychological way, and I do believe that excessive constant anxiety can "rewire the brain", cause hippocampal changes -- thought that isn't clear, cause hormonal imbalances ... from chronic fight/flight mode.

But for instance, shorter life span ... that can be attributed to suicide. Suicide is the third, THIRD, leading cause of death among teenagers. Teens are more impuslive, feel far more ashamed to seek help ... they also abuse substances to "escape the misery of their suffering" -- and as noted, many come from VERY loving families.

Also, many mentally ill are subject to danger and violence if they live on the street, are incarcerated, or simply not treated for their brain problems or problems re: phsyical health.

OK, I'll stop carrying on. But I feel this type of Second Hand information can be misleading, confusing, etc. Note: NOT (sorry edit) all military vets get PTSD ... some do. Why do some and not others who have experienced the same horrors? It has to do how the individual INTERPRETS and COPES with the event, due to a give disposition or personality. If someone in the military does not seek help out of shame ... things only get worse. Also, in past wars, many who were severely injured (Traumatic Brain Injuries) never survived ... lose a leg, you could survive. Get part of your brain blown up ... not likely, etc., etc, etc.

Thanks for your more detailed research.
I have less time these days to follow up on this, and it's a lot of work.
D


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## never_giving_up

Am a HUGE fan of stefan molyneux. His podcasts have helped me soooooo much in getting a better understanding of myself and my history. He has enlightened me and helped me connect to reality in a way that has been extremely beneficial. I highly recommend you check out his site http://www.freedomainradio.com/ where he has over 1600 podcasts filled with stimulating thought-provoking false-reality shattering loveliness


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