# did



## junfan (Apr 12, 2008)

is depersonalisation assoicated with dissociative identity disorder? or dissociative identity disorder??

They seem very similar?? Can someone outside ie family member tell if you were acting with different personalitys?? or is it something you are aware? ie is the sufferer aware of it?? or is he not?? They seem so alike to dp? not sure??
what about dissociation?? i have a real problem with my personal identiy? I have lost my self, i dont know myself, I dont feel right as my self, I just cant seem to accept me as me, there seems to be this massive person i have to be, I cant be me infront of anyone, I loss my sense of self infront of my parents especially, I have never had a bad childhood, I have had a supporting family but yet i went throught a shitty 1and half year problem with jobs, money, prospects etc and now i feel like i have so lost my self I just act, but i really want to cry my eyes oput every second as i feel all i want to be is me and have a self acceptance of me, and not feel odd, or separate from me, I have a real problem with this. I am just wondering if its something more than dp??
Sorry to be a pain in the arse, But I seem to be a weak minded person


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## Luka (Aug 30, 2005)

Depersonalisation and dissociative identitydisorder are both dissociative disorders. They're both part of the dissociative spectrum, with DP at the beginning and DID at the end (= most severe):

(1) DP - (2) PTSD - (3) DDNOS - (4) DID

If you have DID, you automatically have DP. If you have DP, you do not have DID.

With DP your self (body and/or mind) feels strange to you, with DID you have dissociative parts (alters) which have their own history and their own way in perceiving themselves and their surroundings. These alters can take over the body, with and without co-consciousness of the primary person.

People who have DP feel estranged to themselves, like they don't know who they really are. Just like the things you said:



> I have lost my self, i dont know myself, I dont feel right as my self


That doesn't mean that there are alters involved. It's _you_ feeling detached (dissociated) from _yourself_.

People cannot see if someone has DID, except for partners, psychologists and close friends. DID is a selfdefense mechanism created in early childhood to deal with trauma's in other to live a normal live, therefor it all (the abuse, the depression, the hate, the sadness, the splitting of the personality etc.) has to be a secret. Nobody must know the trust, not even the person who has DID. It's too dangerous.

Sincerely,
Luka (diagnosed with DID)


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## Guest (Nov 16, 2008)

junfan said:


> is depersonalisation assoicated with dissociative identity disorder? or dissociative identity disorder??
> 
> They seem very similar?? Can someone outside ie family member tell if you were acting with different personalitys?? or is it something you are aware? ie is the sufferer aware of it?? or is he not?? They seem so alike to dp? not sure??
> what about dissociation?? i have a real problem with my personal identiy? I have lost my self, i dont know myself, I dont feel right as my self, I just cant seem to accept me as me, there seems to be this massive person i have to be, I cant be me infront of anyone, I loss my sense of self infront of my parents especially, I have never had a bad childhood, I have had a supporting family but yet i went throught a shitty 1and half year problem with jobs, money, prospects etc and now i feel like i have so lost my self I just act, but i really want to cry my eyes oput every second as i feel all i want to be is me and have a self acceptance of me, and not feel odd, or separate from me, I have a real problem with this. I am just wondering if its something more than dp??
> Sorry to be a pain in the arse, But I seem to be a weak minded person


I am no expert in DID which is the most difficult dissociative disorder to understand for me. But there are four main dissociative states:

It doesn't sound as if you have DID at all. And, Luka, you are obviously an expert in this I am not, but DID used to be called MPD (but it was found that highly suggestible individuals working with well-meaning therapists can believe they have more alters than they do). There is also a theory that DID may be related to Borderline Personality Disorder which may be at some point called Mood Dysregulation Disorder (psychiatry/neurology has a Loooong way to go). It really isn't properly figured. But DID would have to go back to something serious in childhood, or as I understand it, it begins very early on in life and later stresses would not have your self breaking into alters. DP/DR under stress is most likely.

*PTSD is not considered a dissociative disorder.* It is an illness unto itself related to the outcome of being exposed to a major life-threatening event -- war, fire, rape, being mugged and stabbed, being in the WTC collapse, etc. I have met individuals with PTSD, veterans, who did not know what I was talking about when I described my depersonalizaiton. (Although as I understand it individuals w/PTSD can have DP, but why the surge in PTSD interest hasn't brought more interest in DP I don't know.) Research into Borderline (where individuals can have severe episodes of DP) has yielded more DP research.

The four Dissociative Disorders are:

1. Dissociative Amnesia
2. Dissociative Fugue
3. Depersonalization/Derealization (which is actually placed as a separate disorder unto itself which I disagree with)
4. Dissociative Identity Disorder (which is quite rare)

and Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified

See my description of my own DP/DR, anxiety, depression
http://dreamchild.net/cacmydp.html

Merck Manual description of Depersonalization Disorder
http://www.merck.com/mmpe/sec15/ch197/ch197b.html
Depersonalization Disorder

Merck definition of dissociative disorders:


> "Everyone occasionally experiences a failure in the normal automatic integration of memories, perceptions, identity, and consciousness. For example, people may drive somewhere and then realize that they do not remember many aspects of the drive because they are preoccupied with personal concerns, a program on the radio, or conversation with a passenger. Typically, such a failure, referred to as nonpathologic dissociation, does not disrupt everyday activities.
> 
> People with a dissociative disorder may totally forget a series of normal behaviors occupying minutes or hours and may sense missing a period of time in their experience. Dissociation thus disrupts the continuity of self and the recollection of life events. People may experience the following:
> 
> ...


Since DP/DR occur in migraine, epilespy, stroke, head trauma, anxiety, depression it is frequently viewed as a secondary symptom. When it is chronic I see it as a CHRONIC secondary symptom (which I have).

You do EDIT: *not* sound as if you have DID. We all have many parts to ourselves. I have very low self-esteem, but put on my "happy face" to a lot of people who would never believe I feel so lousy inside. That isn't DID. Having different moods at different times isn't DID.

NOTE, YOU MUST GET DIAGNOSED BY A PROFESSIONAL, DON'T DEPEND ON A BOOK OR ANY FORM OF SELF-DIAGNOSIS OR LISTENING TO ME! 8)

Have a look at the Merck Definition.
DID is very more serious and rare (as is a fugue state - I have met one young woman with fugue states in some 25 years of involvement in mental health reserach.) DP/DR can occur in the normal population. I see it as an extreme "fight flight reaction."

I also suggest reading Marlene Steinberg's "Stranger in the Mirror" -- but you MUST read the entire book not just portions of it. And you shouldn't self-diagnose with it. Also two great books on perceptual disortion, "A Brief Tour of Human Consciousness" by V.S. Ramachandran and "My Stroke of Insight" where Jill Talor, Ph.D. describes dissociation beautifully during a stroke.

*I am not a doctor. I only speak from my own experience and my own research, and volunteering with the mentally ill.*

Take all of this IMHO.
Take Care,
D


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## Guest (Nov 17, 2008)

With DID, you are aware of some personalities and some personalities are aware of eachother and can be coinflict with eachother. But no, You wouldnt be aware of all of them,there would be two or more even,but at least two that you are not aware of.Depersonalisation is a symptom experienced by people with DID, yes, as well as being a symptom of many other disordors.Yes people will tell you are differant all of the time before you would notice something is not right or even care to admit to.There will be evidence of memory loss also although some alters will even hide this stuff from the primary person and a sence of having no consistency and alot of confusion........

What you describe just sounds like regular Dp,d.

Take care.


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## Luka (Aug 30, 2005)

> And, Luka, you are obviously an expert in this I am not, but DID used to be called MPD (but it was found that highly suggestible individuals working with well-meaning therapists can believe they have more alters than they do).


The reason MPD was changed to DID was because it described the situation better. Although it feels that way to people with DID, there are not really multiple personalities in one body. The personalities are dissociated states.



> There is also a theory that DID may be related to Borderline Personality Disorder which may be at some point called Mood Dysregulation Disorder (psychiatry/neurology has a Loooong way to go). It really isn't properly figured.


Some people with DID have (symptoms of) BPD others do not.



> PTSD is not considered a dissociative disorder.


Officially it is not. However, people with PTSD can have dissociative symptoms and they (the people who write the DSM)were thinking to put it alongside the dissociative disorders.

BTW, alot of people with DID have complex PTSD due to their traumatic childhood.


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