# Really feeling like giving up



## jaiespoir (Jul 13, 2014)

I really hate to sound so negative, in fact I am an extremely positive person and I always made an effort to find the good in every situation. But I have had this now for almost a year and I have done everything I possibly can to feel better and to fight this, and no matter what I do I always end up right back up at the beginning.

Before I had DP/DR I was happy. I was top of my class, loving college and my program. I was working a job that I loved and I had friends. I was smart and funny and loved my life. I have a great boyfriend who is wonderful and supportive and I was finally getting along really well with my family. All of sudden, out of the blue this hit me and I never saw it coming. It was awful, I spent weeks calling in sick and lying in my bed. My boyfriend and family were amazing and supported me and eventually I realized that I had to make an effort to get better. And I did. This lifted and went away for about 2 months. And then it came back again, all of a sudden, full force. Nothing provoked it at all. It hit me right before I went to start my final year of college. Since then I have tried counselling, self help, therapies, medication, mindfulness, positive thinking, going through the motions, vitamins, exercise, and trying to live my life like normal.

None of it is working. I get no relief. And now I'm at the point where all my ambition and motivation is completely gone and it's all I can do to even get dressed and leave my apartment. I am tired all the time and just feel numb. I don't know what I ever did to deserve this, but DP/DR has stolen my whole life and taken everything from me. I cannot go on like this, everyday is a battle and life should not be this hard. I have tried everything and nothing works. And I can't imagine living the rest of my life this way, it's so awful. I just don't know what to do anymore, I'm at a complete loss...


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## sunjet (Nov 21, 2014)

If you will fight it, try find a miracle cure, try to figure it out you will have it for years.

But if you stop fighting it, and let it be there, it will go away.



> Why so many people actually stay in the cycle of anxiety and, in many cases, feel they are getting worse. It is because they are fighting a constant battle to feel better and lose their symptoms. They may spend all day trying to 'rid' themselves of how they feel. They may attempt to unravel the whole day trying to work out what they did wrong or why they felt like they did. They may spend the whole time in deep thought trying to find a way out and breaking down from time to time as they see no way out. The harder they try to escape from their mental torment, the worse they feel, believing that no one understands and finding little or no help wherever they turn.
> 
> I know this person was me. I thought so deeply each day, I was losing touch with the world around me. I fought these feelings and let them frustrate me so much that my anxiety certainly got worse. I thought of nothing else but getting better. I spent my whole time acting through my day, hoping no one would notice how I felt and it was a constant battle just to get through each day. I never once thought about doing anything else but trying to think myself better. What else could I do but fight and figure it out for myself, when I was given no advice or explanation for how I felt? Little did I know that I was doing the exact opposite to what I should be doing.
> 
> Rather than run away and try to rid yourself of how you feel, I want you to actually go towards your feelings. Don't run away or hide from them. For once realise it is okay to have anxiety. Remember, it's only natural in the circumstances to feel the way you do. If your nerves and mind are exhausted there is not a single thing you can do to make it all go away instantly, so you may as well get along together. Someone once said 'You must make anxiety your friend in order for you 'both' to live in peaceful harmony' and this is so very true.


Source : At Last a Life by Paul David


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## abram24 (Mar 3, 2015)

I know exactly how you feel. I've been having DP daily for almost a year and it's hard. My therapist recommend to me not to focus on it but to try and figure out what is causing the detachment since it's usually a defense mechanism so they say. I don't know, but it seems to help me a little bit trying to focus on other things. It still doesn't make it go away, but it helps a bit.


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## Jurgen (Aug 3, 2013)

I think the more important question is; what are you trying to fight?

DPDR is a disorder, but it is not seperate from you. It is not an object. You cannot physically grasp it or measure it from one end to another.

So are you really just fighting yourself? If so; why?


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