# Sorry Martin :(



## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

I accidentally achieved your goal for you last night.

But if it makes you feel any better, it was with someone that really annoyed the absolute crap out of me.

Like, I have no idea why I slept with him.

Although it did feel GOOD and I got at least an hour of really really deep sleep...I just can't believe I had sex with someone I couldn't look in the face.

But think of it is I took one for the team. See, now you in your getting-laid expedition will have the very important reminder of "don't do what person3 did" and therefore find someone you could TOLERATE looking in the eye.

I don't know what it was about this person...just....GOD they were so irritating somehow. I think because they were into Chinese medicine and a whole load of new age shit.

But I just had to point out the utter irony...


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

person3 said:


> Like, I have no idea why I slept with him.


there could almost be one of those cartoon bubbles coming out of your avatar with this line inside it. Perhaps throwing in a "totally" or "No Way!" for good measure.


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

actually, now that i mention it, what exactly are you doing in that picture? Is that indeed you? And if so, was it taken as you were coming in from outside to yell at someone to hurry up who was taking longer than usual to get ready upstairs?

i'm just curious. The picture has mystified me for some time now. It looks as though there should be a tagline below that reads: "Heeeeere's Person3!!!"


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## enigma (Feb 18, 2005)

person3 said:


> But if it makes you feel any better, it was with someone that really annoyed the absolute crap out of me.
> 
> Like, I have no idea why I slept with him.
> 
> ...


How thoughtless of me, I forgot to say: _thank_ you!

I _love_ New Mexico! 

e


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

enigma- yes, you are too rude!

sebastian, it's hilarious you mention the valley girl thing about the picture because that is what it is. Some people think it's horror movie. But it's a valley girl. I was dressed up as a ballerina at a costume party and I thought it would be funny to do a valley girl pose for the girl taking pics of every costume.

i wish i knew how to edit in a bubble, i would, like, TOTALLY TOTALLY TOTALLY put that in there! that would be hilarious.


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## terri* (Aug 17, 2004)

Someone sent this to me tonight and I could not help thinking about you and Martin. I think even Martin might appreciate this prayer. 

Melissa's Prayer
>
> Before I lay me down to sleep,
> I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
> One who's handsome, smart and strong
> One who loves to listen long,
> One who thinks before he speaks,
> One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
> I pray he's gainfully employed,
> When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.
> Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
> Massages my back and begs to do more.
> Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
> Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"
> I pray that this man will love me to no end,
> And always be my very best friend.
> Amen.
>
>
Martin's Prayer
>
> I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs
> Who owns a liquor store and a big boat.
> This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.
> Amen.


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

> I accidentally achieved your goal for you last night.


What ? You performed an unthinkable myriad of unspeakable sexual acts on me and left in the morning without saying a word - except perhaps to tell me where you left the tip? This is astonishing news, as I wasn't aware of any of this. I'm calling the police !!

Seriously, I'm happy for you, or not - depending on how you feel about your dirty deed. But (when will the americans learn?), that's _not_ irony.

On a lighter note, I'm not completely emaciated or bedridden. In fact, I think the weight loss has done me proud, although I'm doing my best to put it all back on. And how could you possibly resist a man who's second arsehole is starting to heal over, like a christmas turkey with ya mom's fist up it's ass, struggling to remove the gibblets! How ? I'll never know.

Terri - :lol: Love my poem - but you forget that the deaf-mute nymphomanic must also have no sense of smell or touch. Anyway, despite what you all think of me, I really am quite the romantic. Can't you tell?


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

uh terry

the part about massaging in the poem...gets me in trouble

see, this guy i spoke of from two nights ago...i didnt like him at all. i liked him for a while but teh more drunk we got the less i liked him. but when we got to his place (yeah ok maybe i didn't HATE him yet) he tried to get up on me and i was like "i'm NOT going to have sex with you!" and a few minutes later he asked me if I wanted a foot massage and i was like "uh ok"

and well the rest is history

so while I pray up and down for more foot massaging, I really have to be careful! oh well...it was worth it!


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## mcsiegs (Apr 27, 2005)

person3 said:


> he tried to get up on me and i was like "i'm NOT going to have sex with you!" and a few minutes later he asked me if I wanted a foot massage and i was like "uh ok"
> 
> and well the rest is history


Nothing like playing hard to get. :roll:

Person3, I genuinely like you, but the more I read your posts like this, the less sorry I feel for you when it comes to your sexual escapades.

To each is own, but you are starting to sound like an overweight person who eats food just because it is there to eat.


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## Ben (Apr 21, 2005)

> Person3, I genuinely like you, but the more I read your posts like this, the less sorry I feel for you when it comes to your sexual escapades.


I don't know as though any of us feel sorry for her...or if we do then we're making a mountain out of a molehill; she clearly has a choice in the matter.....


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

it's okay this time, i knew where things stood.

I don't mean to make this sound at ALL like the last one...i had expectations for that deal, had planned to get to know the person, etc.

i think that maybe i should have tried to do this with the situation I had a fit over, it would have breezed over better. but this time i was seriously like "fuck it, just do it" and while there were a few moments of weirdness in the end i'm glad i did it.

All i have to worry about now is whether or not to get a morning after pill...


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

and hey! I eat food just because it's there to eat too *cries*

can't really help that one though. Food is just too damn good and it doesn't talk back. 8)


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## Ben (Apr 21, 2005)

> Food is just too damn good and it doesn't talk back.


Ever tried sushi?


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## Guest (Jun 24, 2005)

Tch, hedonists...

:roll:


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## jc (Aug 10, 2004)

All i have to worry about now is whether or not to get a morning after pill...[/quote]

is that before or after the hiv test


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Jc - I thought that, but I was too cowardly to say it.

All emoticons apply. :lol: :shock:   :!:

Martin retreats into a bunker to await the explosion.


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## mcsiegs (Apr 27, 2005)

jc said:


> is that before or after the hiv test


Priceless...


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

If there was a chance of me having a terminal illness...

and a chance of me having a child...

my family would probably KILL me over the child issue first.

didn't think about aids. don't worry, i got lectured on that a LOT (the whole session) by the new therapist i'm seeing, as well as the woman I'm staying with. I've been with people in the past (years ago) that would be considered much higher risks than this person, but of course i don't know etc etc.

what has happened has happened. and because i was stupid enough not to get a morning after pill yesterday when i had a car available to me, I will probably miss the 72 hour period to get it. I already pissed my grandma off enough today with one tiny mistake, there is absolutely no way i can tell her "hey, i had a one night stand while you were out of town and while i was staying with your cousin. can we drive to walgreens so i can get a consultation and a morning after pill?"

so yeah, no idea what will happen next. the only thing that really worries me is the time of the month this happened (a condom was used...for some of the time...and I already have heard everything and back about that)

so i did a stupid thing. I already am risking pregnancy rather than telling my grandmother (she and her husband, whom i don't think i could tell, are the only ones that could take me tonight). The reason i won't tell her is because i have already screwed up her life enough today, and she is very unforgiving and harsh. I could tell anybody else but her. I seriously don't think some of you would understand how much she would flip out. She is the only one with the car though.


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## rainboteers (Apr 5, 2005)

Can you borrow the car without her going with you?


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## person3 (Aug 10, 2004)

Hm. maybe. but i would have to have a place to say i was going to, and i wouldnt know what to do if she said she was going with me.

i made her VERY mad today when i accidentally caused her to be slightly late to one of her important socialite things (that is a criminal equivalent to keying her car or something), so I'm really unsure.

thanks for the suggestion, though. i didn't even think about that.


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## rainboteers (Apr 5, 2005)

That is tough, she sounds really nasty. Maybe tell her you want to go for a drive to clear your head, alone. I don't know if that would flip her out or not but it's worth a try, otherwise this next month is going to be hell for you.


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## enngirl5 (Aug 10, 2004)

Take a cab. If it's anything like here there's a Walgreens around every corner. Also, Person3 I have something to say on behalf of everyone being judgemental. Nobody wants to hear about somebody getting laid when none of us are getting any. Or maybe it's just me. Take care P3. You used a condom so everything will probably be fine.


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## enigma (Feb 18, 2005)

enngirl5 said:


> Nobody wants to hear about somebody getting laid when none of us are getting any. Or maybe it's just me.


Hey babe, if arthropods don't freak you out, maybe we could help each other out on that one (I _would_ expect you to devour me from my head down to at least my torso, however. That's just how us guys _like_ it!  ).


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

that is one handsome looking anthropod, enigma...


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## enigma (Feb 18, 2005)

sebastian said:


> that is one handsome looking anthropod, enigma...


Hey, this isn't a come on now, is it? (First you post the picture of that parade, now this, hmmmm).

Not that it would make any _difference_, mind you.

But as I've stated before: straight but not narrow.

e


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## sebastian (Aug 11, 2004)

frankly enigma, i'll take anything i can get these days...be it man, woman, fruit, or insect...


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## enigma (Feb 18, 2005)

sebastian said:


> frankly enigma, i'll take anything i can get these days...be it man, woman, fruit, or insect...


Fair enough.

It's just...I'm _not_ that kind of insect (people always think that just because I'm segmented I sleep with _everybody_. :x ).

e


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## Ben (Apr 21, 2005)

> It's just...I'm not that kind of insect


Shouldn't this be on that "say something that's never been said before" thread?


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## enigma (Feb 18, 2005)

Ben said:


> > It's just...I'm not that kind of insect
> 
> 
> Shouldn't this be on that "say something that's never been said before" thread?


Actually I thought of that, but it was already too late. :lol:

e


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## Brainsilence02 (Jan 29, 2005)

person3 said:


> i made her VERY mad today when i accidentally caused her to be slightly late to one of her important socialite things (that is a criminal equivalent to keying her car or something), so I'm really unsure.


she might be even more mad if she learns that you are having a child.

what happened? did you managed to get the medicine/pill?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

Seriously, do insects have vaginas? I'm curious, because there is a big fat hairy spider the size of a dinner plate in the corner of my room.


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## g-funk (Aug 20, 2004)

Are you tempted?


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## Martinelv (Aug 10, 2004)

I'm beyond temptation G-FUNK. I am the blind boy shot by Cupids arrow.


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