# "Blank" head



## Manic D (Jun 29, 2005)

Does anybody else get the sensation like they can't think? Like there's nothing going on in your head at all when you try to think of something to say or something (I'm not talking about the bizarre disconnected feeling I get when I'm talking to people, like my voice is not connected to me and I don't know where the words are coming from but I suppose they could be related)? I'm a writer and sometimes when I sit down to write songs I'm just so blank I can't think of where to begin. I mean, some of this can be attributed to normal "writer's block" but some of it can't. I remember my first time trying to write while DP/DR'ed I though I couldn't write ever again the sensation was so profound. It's like I have all this crazy shit going on in my head but at the same time I feel like my head is stuffed with cotton balls.


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## Guest_ (Sep 17, 2005)

I feel the exact same way. It feels like your EXTREMLY STRESSED but i have nothing to stress at all. Its soo shi tty.


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## nemesis (Aug 10, 2004)

I also experience the same problem with attention plus those listed below:

- Severe attentional difficulty (difficulty reading / absorbing new material. difficulty planning etc)
- Memory recall problems
- Word recall issues (trouble finding the correct words in sentences, word substitution under moments of high stress. Eg. Efficient is replaced with Elephant)
- Chronic high stress and anxiety (feeling that something is seriously wrong, my life is out of control and I do not have the focus to reign it back in)
- Irritability
- Darting eyes (unable to focus on an object for extended periods of time)
- Some dissociative instances (feeling detached and listening to your own voice when talking. This is usually the point in time where word substitution occurs)
- Obsessive negative thoughts

All symptoms are made worse when tiredness is combined with a high stress situation.


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## livinginhell333 (Feb 19, 2005)

yes i have this pretty much all the time. my mind is just blank, but for some reason i can still kinda hold up a conversation. but yea most of the time there are no thoughts in my head. like cotton balls yea.


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## fingertingle (Sep 29, 2005)

Yeah. It's the worst. Even with stimulation (someone else saying anything, or even this post) I don't feel much of a "jolt" in my brain.


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## Manic D (Jun 29, 2005)

Nemesis your symptoms sound a lot (a lot) like mine.


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## rlf (Nov 5, 2005)

Sometimes talking to the boss at work my mind will go so blank that I cannot understand or respond to even a simple question. I have a horrible panic because I realize I have to snap out of it quick or look like a nut. It usually lasts about a minute and so far no one has caught on. Only happens at work because the stakes for appearing like a nut are higher.


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## Universal (May 30, 2005)

i get the zomboid blankness, where i can't feel my feelings and can't sense my thoughts. i wonder if other dp'ers have these symptoms too and i guess they do. feeling blank all the time keeps me from visualizing and having mental pictures like other normals do. it's really no fun at all. so what to do about it? i havn't a clue. i've spoken about it to my shrink and still no answers.


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## BMF54123 (Aug 10, 2004)

I have this problem 24/7. I stumble around, empty-headed, like a friggin' zombie all day long. I sound like an idiot when I speak because I often have to come to a full stop and try to remember what the hell I was talking about, or scramble to assemble a coherent sentence. I haven't seriously worked on my website or written much assembly code for over a year because the necessary knowledge is JUST NOT THERE ANYMORE. Problems that I could solve in minutes back in my "glory days" now sometimes take hours...long, painful, fruitless hours, spent mostly staring cross-eyed into space. It's like trying to squeeze water from a sponge that's been left in the sun all day.

You're definitely not alone.


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## Guest (Jan 11, 2006)

schizfit said:


> Sometimes talking to the boss at work my mind will go so blank that I cannot understand or respond to even a simple question. I have a horrible panic because I realize I have to snap out of it quick or look like a nut. It usually lasts about a minute and so far no one has caught on. Only happens at work because the stakes for appearing like a nut are higher.


Hey there

I can *totally* sympathise with your story. From reading everybodies accounts of their DP here, i see my symptoms of DP as relatively small compared to what some go through, but nevertheless its still a pain in the arse for me.

Anyway, i got to a point in work where i was just fed up of making up illnesses to go home sick, like migraine, period pains, tiredness. I was always afraid of telling my boss the truth, that i have anxiety disorder and DP symptoms, without her thinking i was a nut. So i asked for a quiet 10 minute chat during a lunch break and i chatted to her about my anxiety and gave her a print out all about DP (dont even bother trying to explain this one! lol) and told her i have some of the symptoms listed. Her postive, caring & concerned response really surprised me, and it felt like a load had been lifted.

You have an obligation, moral obligation perhaps, to tell your boss that you have an illness which is affecting your performance at work. And you will feel much better for doing it, i only hope your boss is as understanding as mine.

But do fess up about it :wink:


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## Guest (Jan 11, 2006)

I can't THINK... plus I can't even write on HERE because of the cotton head!


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## Mollusk (Nov 12, 2005)

I have the same problem. Constant blankness. I never have anything to contribute to a conversation because i don't even know what my thoughts or feelings on the topic is. I always feel fake because i have to pull opinions out of my ass because i have none of my own. Every event and action in life can be percieved in so many ways. They all seem to have validity. I have no inkling towards any. I am not a person really anymore. I just float along and do what is easyiest, or whats expected of me or what i think other people would want me to do or say. I think of every person in the world as different puzzle pieces. The all have different shapes made up of nooks and crannies according to their personality. I am an amorphous blob that comes across the other puzzle pieces and tries to fit in with one, but it doesn't work, cause its fake. Only the other puzzle pieces can fit with each other.

When I can actually get a get a train of thought started, it derails pretty quickly and i go back into the zombie zone.


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## Luka (Aug 30, 2005)

I think this is a very common thing among people with DP from what I've read and heard. I have it too and when I am concentrating on it, I get really scared and panic. Concentrating on DP will make the DP worse. I have to trust the fact that my knowledge is still in my head, stored in my brain. It is, otherwise I couldn't write this for instance!


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## Seeker (Jan 13, 2006)

I also have that problem, which is causing me a lot of anxiety and depression.. All I can feel is that my head, thoughts, feelings, and reactions went flatlined.. The thinking part is what affects me the most, since, my thoughts are usually my guidance...Also it feels like everything that i have ever learned, experienced, aqcuired, and mostly mastered, has simply disappeared, vanished, or, in terms of DP, it was some 33 years long dream, and i ve woken up to be completely empty..It sort of feels like being mentally naked and worse, disabled. Some times weeks go by, the same exact way. Just sitting there on my couch, having a trauma-like feeling, completely paralyzed, and staring into nothing, though i look like i am watching tv, but i am not.. It starts the moment I open my eyes up in the morning, and i don't think it ends..it just goes to rest when i sleep..
Very sad thing to go thru.. being imprisonned into your own thoughts..
SoulSeeker


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## fingertingle (Sep 29, 2005)

urbn said:


> I have the same problem. Constant blankness. I never have anything to contribute to a conversation because i don't even know what my thoughts or feelings on the topic is. I always feel fake because i have to pull opinions out of my ass because i have none of my own. Every event and action in life can be percieved in so many ways. They all seem to have validity. I have no inkling towards any. I am not a person really anymore. I just float along and do what is easyiest, or whats expected of me or what i think other people would want me to do or say. I think of every person in the world as different puzzle pieces. The all have different shapes made up of nooks and crannies according to their personality. I am an amorphous blob that comes across the other puzzle pieces and tries to fit in with one, but it doesn't work, cause its fake. Only the other puzzle pieces can fit with each other.
> 
> When I can actually get a get a train of thought started, it derails pretty quickly and i go back into the zombie zone.


Exactly.


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## Luka (Aug 30, 2005)

> Also it feels like everything that i have ever learned, experienced, aqcuired, and mostly mastered, has simply disappeared, vanished


Yep, I feel the exact same thing.


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## Seeker (Jan 13, 2006)

Luka said:


> > Also it feels like everything that i have ever learned, experienced, aqcuired, and mostly mastered, has simply disappeared, vanished
> 
> 
> Yep, I feel the exact same thing.


I wonder if this is DP/DR related or just anxious thoughts and worries without actually being translated into anxiety, since emotions are flat.


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## Luka (Aug 30, 2005)

It's very complex and I could be wrong of course, but I personally think of this blank state of mind like all knowledge and thoughts has disappeard as DP related, because DP means being estranged or alienated from your body and/or _*mind*_.


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## lemontea (Aug 8, 2005)

urbn said:


> ...Every event and action in life can be percieved in so many ways. They all seem to have validity. I have no inkling towards any...


Hey, this doesn't necessarily has to be a bad thing! Most people think their opinion is the only valid one; being able to somehow accept all of them is a gift actually. I know this can be frustrating, but try to see the better side of it.


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## Guest (Jan 15, 2006)

On not being able to think: hah! Yes, very much so. Not all the time, but it's fairly common. I'll have something to do - write an email in work, wrap Christmas presents, can be anything, and I'll just find myself staring in front of me not doing anything. I get a running monologue in my head like "Think! Think! THINK! What do I do first? Okay, now, just DO IT. It isn't working. Why can't I THINK?"

It's almost like the thoughts are jumping round my head, with a pressure at the base of my skull, and my body will freeze.


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## Guest (Jan 15, 2006)

Archer said:


> On not being able to think: hah! Yes, very much so. Not all the time, but it's fairly common. I'll have something to do - write an email in work, wrap Christmas presents, can be anything, and I'll just find myself staring in front of me not doing anything. I get a running monologue in my head like "Think! Think! THINK! What do I do first? Okay, now, just DO IT. It isn't working. Why can't I THINK?"
> 
> It's almost like the thoughts are jumping round my head, with a pressure at the base of my skull, and my body will freeze.


Yeah, I coach myself too. "Think, little brain, think!" which I think I picked up from Winnie the Pooh. Or "MOVE MOVE MOVE!" just to bring me back to the moment.


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