# Recovery Road



## LuluCalavera (Jan 21, 2013)

To those of you currently in process of recovering or to those that have recovered, what does it feel like? I.E. how do you know you're in process or making progress towards recovery? Sorry if this is a confusing question, but not sure how to word it?


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## fresko123 (Jan 23, 2013)

I have the same question, because I feel like I'm getting better but it's kind of hard to tell. It's hard to put my finger on exactly what is better, I just feel a little better, but I hope I'm not just getting used to it.


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## LuluCalavera (Jan 21, 2013)

EXACTLY how i feel. I don't feel so depressed and I laugh more and I am not so scared to go in public and my memory gets better and I'm not afraid to fall asleep either. What about you? Do you feel a difference in anything specifically?


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## sarah514 (Aug 24, 2010)

I've had DP for going on for 4 years, and to be honest I can't give an actual account, because I'm not sure I'm recovering. From my experience, DP occurs in a number of stages. At first you freak out, this lasted about 4 months for me. And then after that it becomes bearable, it's not a constant thought and you begin to live again. My interpretation, is that our minds go through severe stress with dp, and it may take a long time to come out of it. I've come to realize that my recovery is a gradual process and one that I now appreciate in helping me understand who I am.


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## flipwilson (Aug 19, 2006)

For me it was a lot of back and forth for 4 years, some good days some really bad days, but never whole. I met this girl in feb 2011 and I still felt like a shell but went out with her anyway. I even remember feeling numb on a couple of our dates. For whatever reason though I did start to come alive the more I hung out with her and truly it was a feeling of caring about life again. Old fears came back, old passions became stronger, the veil fell down, and the visual symptoms were completely gone. I noticed my recovery most when i was being physical, whether it was sex or cuddling, as I noticed a connection to my body again that had been blunted. Then somewhere at the end of 2011 dissociation was a memory. I could not remember what it was like to feel so shitty. I was me again. You won't be totally brand new like I thought because life is there and you can actually feel it which brings good and bad, but it was mostly good for sure. I could sit in a room alone with nothing to do and not feel restless,lost, or empty. I thought about life and made plans and worked on my artwork. I cared and it was so fucking natural to do so.

I would say that recovery is a natural flowing process that takes time for most and is gradual as well. There are stories of instant recovery but it is rare. I will say physically I knew I was getting better because my head felt warm and not like a tin can. I also didn't have the pressure or the odd sensations in the front of my forehead. I also got my sleeping pattern to a healthy morning rise and nightly fall. No more night owl garbage and it worked. I actually started feeling nice and sleepy at night and had good deep restorative sleep, not the garbage REM sleep every 2 hours like I had with dissociation.

My advice to you right now if you are feeling like you are on the right path and you've conquered the first onslaught of symptoms is to get some very healthy sleep, keep doing what you love, and get off this site as of right now. When you feel like you again keep making yourself mentally and physically and emotionally stronger so you never end up in this state again. I was off this site for the two years I was alive and its great not to be here. I'm only here now to share some perspective.


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## LuluCalavera (Jan 21, 2013)

Thanks so much for the input Sarah and flip. I do believe I'm on the right track, I guess I keep second guessing myself which needs to stop NOW. I am no longer terrified or crying and bitching about it every day. As of now I am just sick and tired and ready to live.


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## fresko123 (Jan 23, 2013)

LuluCalavera said:


> EXACTLY how i feel. I don't feel so depressed and I laugh more and I am not so scared to go in public and my memory gets better and I'm not afraid to fall asleep either. What about you? Do you feel a difference in anything specifically?


Yesss, I feel the same way! I'm not as depressed, I feel like I have more of my personality back, I go out with way less anxiety, and I wake up with practically no anxiety now. I definitely still feel "off" though, like my vision, things still don't look like they used to. But I'm not focused on these symptoms 24/7 anymore. I feel like my train of thought is back to thinking about normal everyday things again. So now I'm trying to focus on keeping my train of thought on these normal thoughts if that makes sense. Like, if I catch myself thinking about my visual symptoms too much I immediately preoccupy my mind with something else.


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## LuluCalavera (Jan 21, 2013)

I do the same :] I do believe we are making progress :] !!


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

You simply feel it.

I didn't recovered fully,but there are times when I have no DR/DP.And yes,you know that you don't have it,and it is SO,SO GREATFUL.


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

I have just slowly started to feel normal again. It's impossible to explain normal but every time something changes I think "this feels like it used to before dp". That and dp symptoms going away is how I know I'm getting better.


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

Exactly,I feel that thing and I think

"That's so real,exactly before DP"

I'm glad I have these moments,they really give you hope.


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## LuluCalavera (Jan 21, 2013)

Same here :] My dp is gone I believe. I feel like my old self and my bubbly personality is back but i still have DR :-\ 
but ill take what i can get lol


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