# Truman Show, thoughts?



## sirlee

I have been dealing with these thoughts on an off for less than a year now, and they can disappear for weeks at a time. I'm scared I'm going to develop psychosis and start believing im in a truman show experience of my own, I have all these what "what if sensations" about like what if there are hidden cameras around me and what if people are in part of a show for me or something. I know its crazy and delusional and everything, but it feels as if its not, and im scared i have moments when I lose my sanity with these ideas and I just don't know, or if I'm going to get better. I worried that its a truman show delusion, and not DR/DP, which i have had for about 18 months now. But how can I know? I need some answers and way to cure this. No one in my family has schizophrenia or psychosis that I know of, and if they have, well then they recovered, but I dont think they have. Any help?

Sirlee


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## WorkingOnIt

I think clinically this would not be classified as psychosis. I think everyone has moments where anxiety takes over and leads to a near solid belief. Several hours later your anxiety about it might be lower and you might feel silly about having felt so anxious about it. Most people would say psychosis would be a solid unwavering belief in what you are worried about. Typically psychosis also includes hallucinations (auditory/visual). I doubt that you have these.

Probably what's closer is "Pure O" OCD, but then again I can't diagnose you. I put myself in your category as well. It's interesting that people with DPDR typically have obsessive worries about things that kind of relate to the feeling of unreality. What you don't see on this site is someone who's feeling unreal and is having obsessive thoughts about gnomes living in the woods behind their house. What I mean is ... our obsessions directly relate to the feeling of unreality. I think that makes it a bit more ... understandable.


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## sirlee

I really like what you said in your last paragraph, I mean most of my thoughts have been about that, I've also had some schizo related thoughts, but I don't think at any point I've actually believed them. It just sucks that before this I wasn't depressed or so anxious or so lost and hopeless sometimes. I'm worried that one day I'm just going to,lose it and go crazy, its what scares me. I wish someone could just tell me or cure me!! Its fucking madness and I can't take the uncertainty.


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## sirlee

Thank you so much by the way


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## sirlee

Antone else has thoughts on this?


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## sirlee

Yeah I have. Ive been dealing with thus for 2 years now. It sucks when i have my bad moments. I read about some guys developing dp/dr at like 15 with Truman show thoughts, although i think he truly believed them, and by like 21 he was crazy, and i cant helo but think im going that way. Its scary


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## sirlee

WorkingOnIt said:


> I think clinically this would not be classified as psychosis. I think everyone has moments where anxiety takes over and leads to a near solid belief. Several hours later your anxiety about it might be lower and you might feel silly about having felt so anxious about it. Most people would say psychosis would be a solid unwavering belief in what you are worried about. Typically psychosis also includes hallucinations (auditory/visual). I doubt that you have these.
> 
> Probably what's closer is "Pure O" OCD, but then again I can't diagnose you. I put myself in your category as well. It's interesting that people with DPDR typically have obsessive worries about things that kind of relate to the feeling of unreality. What you don't see on this site is someone who's feeling unreal and is having obsessive thoughts about gnomes living in the woods behind their house. What I mean is ... our obsessions directly relate to the feeling of unreality. I think that makes it a bit more ... understandable.


so you think its some sort of just ocd, and I'm not going to go crazy?


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## WorkingOnIt

sirlee said:


> so you think its some sort of just ocd, and I'm not going to go crazy?


I don't know, but I do know that evidence suggests most people who go crazy have minimal insight into their delusions.

If nothing else, take heart in knowing that if you do go crazy, you wont wonder whether or not you are anymore. You'll feel absolutely sure that you are Truman, and you wont be here asking if you are crazy, because you'll FEEL ABSOLUTELY SURE.

Anxiety based disorders seem to feed off of reassurance seeking behavior. After 2 years, perhaps it's time to try to avoid forums and other places which suggest to you that someone has gone crazy from those thoughts. Maybe it's true for that person, but you're not that person.

The video of the week on the front page talks about handling these kinds of thoughts effectively.


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## sirlee

WorkingOnIt said:


> I don't know, but I do know that evidence suggests most people who go crazy have minimal insight into their delusions.
> 
> If nothing else, take heart in knowing that if you do go crazy, you wont wonder whether or not you are anymore. You'll feel absolutely sure that you are Truman, and you wont be here asking if you are crazy, because you'll FEEL ABSOLUTELY SURE.
> 
> Anxiety based disorders seem to feed off of reassurance seeking behavior. After 2 years, perhaps it's time to try to avoid forums and other places which suggest to you that someone has gone crazy from those thoughts. Maybe it's true for that person, but you're not that person.
> 
> The video of the week on the front page talks about handling these kinds of thoughts effectively.


thats not what i was hoping to hear. I mean i just wish i knew if i was going to get worse or get better. Im like, 99% percent sure that that nootion is wrong, but its like ny mind creates all these scenarios and fucked up ideas of why it might be true, it even picks up things its read online and makes them seem like they're real in my head. I heard that if after two years after developing ocd youre not crazy, then you're in the clear, and like I said, all of my family just suffers from anxiety related disorders. You're absolutely right, I just wish I knew. Plus I wish I wasn't depersonalized anymore you know?


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## WorkingOnIt

I totally understand not wanting to be depersonalized. I think we all forget that we don't actually need certainty to recover from DPDR.

You can think of a near infinite number of scenarios which may or may not be true. It's just when we latch on to the thought and run over it for 2 years that it becomes ingrained in us. I know you've heard it a million times, but we have to learn to regard the thoughts for what they are. Just thoughts.


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## Smile

Look up The Truman Show Delusion or Truman Syndrome.


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## Billy D.P.

This is interesting. I used to have these same thoughts as a child, though only intermittently. The Truman Show is a great movie.


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## Wendy

The Truman Show was actually one of the bigger things I've battled during my time with Depersonalization.



sirlee said:


> thats not what i was hoping to hear. I mean i just wish i knew if i was going to get worse or get better. Im like, 99% percent sure that that nootion is wrong, but its like ny mind creates all these scenarios and fucked up ideas of why it might be true, it even picks up things its read online and makes them seem like they're real in my head. I heard that if after two years after developing ocd youre not crazy, then you're in the clear, and like I said, all of my family just suffers from anxiety related disorders. You're absolutely right, I just wish I knew. Plus I wish I wasn't depersonalized anymore you know?


You're not crazy.

If it gives you any sense of relief, I have recovered from Depersonalization and have been fine for the past year and a half. The biggest (and first) thing that I had to battle was the Truman Show delusion. Except.. it's not really a delusion and you're not crazy - you're just scared of the possibility, which ends up being impossible, but your mind isn't telling you that because you're trying to prepare for the worst.



sirlee said:


> I'm scared I'm going to develop psychosis and start believing im in a truman show experience of my own, I have all these what "what if sensations" about like what if there are hidden cameras around me and what if people are in part of a show for me or something. I know its crazy and delusional and everything, but it feels as if its not, and im scared i have moments when I lose my sanity with these ideas and I just don't know, or if I'm going to get better. I worried that its a truman show delusion, and not DR/DP, which i have had for about 18 months now. But how can I know? I need some answers and way to cure this. No one in my family has schizophrenia or psychosis that I know of, and if they have, well then they recovered, but I dont think they have. Any help?


This isn't psychosis, schizophrenia, or delusions.

You're just afraid and obsessing over that fear because you can't absolutely know for certain that the Truman Show doesn't exist. At least, that's what you're telling yourself because when you obsess over thoughts like this, you aren't likely to think about it logically enough to dismiss the idea. Obsession is what's happening here; you're not going crazy or losing your mind, you just have a thought in your head that you can't shake.

So, try to understand that just because you think about something scary, doesn't mean that it's true and it doesn't mean you're going insane. I've been there, I know how scary that can be - especially the thought of losing your mind. I've had really dark experiences with the Truman Show myself, but you'll definitely defeat it and you'll look back later on and laugh. Believe me!

Something that helped me with these scary thoughts was thinking about it logically. Think about these things, if the Truman Show existed:


They'd have to pay for trillions of cameras. That's a lot of money!
People who have to act perfectly for decades. That's just impossible!
Is your life interesting enough for people to watch all the time? 

That last one wasn't meant to be rude. I wrote that because it was one of the thoughts that really helped me out of this Jim Carrey funk. When I had Depersonalization, I was sleeping all day and listening to music. I thought to myself, "Would people seriously want to watch me do this really mundane shit all the time?" No, not really, I don't think anyone's life is that interesting to warrant an entire television show, right?

Hope that helps!

You'll get over it, I promise!


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