# How i truly feel, as im loosing my mind..



## SeanTheTree (Aug 1, 2012)

I started senior year a couple days ago, and my anxiety and emotion is just putting me into pain. I have a couple friends at the same school but hardly ever see them, so really im just alone. I feel like im overthinking everything, but my brain can't help it. Ive done a couple drugs before, including marijuana, xanax, salvia, molly, and meth, and coming now its beginning to dawn on me and serve as a severe consequence. . Junior year was when i was doing all that and the only drug ive used recently is marijuana (wax concentrate) , and even now im trying so hard to quit but withdraws keep bringing be back, i cant eat right, i cant sleep good, my brain just keeps thinking "ohh man bro you need some THC". but fuck im tired of it. Im tired of this fucking anxiety its just beating on me. The only thing that keeps me truly happy no matter what is usually music. And i developed a hobby of producing it too and it actually makes me feel good about myself. Today i felt odddly uncomfortable in one of my classes today, as the teacher said "We will be presenting these essays too" i got a sudden urge of anxiety and panic and just felt really uncomfortable. Thankfully i didnt have to presentate today cause i was saved by the bell. I mean i usually do get pretty dam nervous when im gonna have to presentate but never throughout Freshman to Junior year i have never felt that uncomfortable, i had hot flashes and just my mind was going crazy. So when i got home i emailed the teacher and told them that i had anxiety and the whole situation of me being a terrible terrible presentator. He got back to me with little understanding of the situation, saying i can bring a note from a parent to not presentate for this one day, so it will give me time to face my fear. But truthfully i dont think i can. Come to this day i accept i have a physiological problem, and hopefully will have an appointment with a psychiatrist in the near future. I feel like im loosing my mind.

I know probably none of you guys are gonna read this or reply or anything but at least i got some stuff off my head.


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## Guest (Sep 5, 2014)

I have read your post, you are not alone.

Everythings gonna be alright if you keep fighting for your own acceptance. Struggle for life. It's hard, life can be hard even when you have good health. If there is a god, only he and the people who suffer from the same disorder can understand your pain. Keep going.


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