# I turned DP into a positive thing for me



## Guest (Jun 16, 2005)

Hi all, this is my first post. Just wanted to let you guys know how I managed to turn DP into a positive thing for me. I've had it since I was about 9 or so, off and on, and never knew how to deal with it. I'd just let it ride itself out. Anyway, about 6 months ago, I woke up feeling completely separated...It was so bad I had feared God was punishing me by not allowing me to feel like I was in reality. I felt complete separation from existance, and I thought to myself, "This must be what hell feels like. Complete separation from everything I know and love. Complete separation from life."

Well, after about a week or two of feeling like this, I decided to try and change the way I was acting. I hated work, I hated talking to people, I hated existing because I was so far detached from it. It was like I was living a movie, and I was a character that was mean, rude, and spiteful...and I didn't care at all.

Something just switched in my brain though. I was tired of being such a bad person, even though I was numb to my own feelings, as well as anyone elses. I decided to stop it. I decided to *become the hero of my movie-like life*. I was still detached, but I definitely controlled all of my actions, so I decided to rewrite my character. I did all sorts of crazy stuff...whatever I imagined the person in my movie to do. I actually enjoyed watching my life play out before me...I became a better person, watching my life and directing it in a positive way. I became a better waiter (that was my job) because I was more talkative and interested in the lives around me. With my girlfriend, I became more romantic, because I realized how important she was in my life. Now, we're engaged to be married. I became more assertive and confident...Just as I always wanted myself to be, but was too scared to become.

Next time you go into dp, I suggest you think about this. Hopefully, it can help a few people out. I haven't gone back into DP in a while, and I'm actually starting to miss it...Life is getting pretty dull


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## rainboteers (Apr 5, 2005)

Thank you for posting your story. I was feeling really down today, but reading that gave me a small lift. I know everything happens for a reason and hopefully I will be a better person after going through this as well.


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## danny (Sep 2, 2004)

It does seem like good advice. This ability to stop being scared of dp does seem to crop up as advice form any recoverers.


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## bark (Nov 7, 2005)

maybe this is gods way of saying do more or change


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