# Absolutely NO Thought Process..



## optimusrhyme

I know kenny made a post about this a cuple weeks ago but im gonna re-post it.

Ive had dp/dr for ten years 24/7.. Ive got all the Symptoms.. feeling detacched from my body, horrible perception shifts, feeling unreal, not recognizing familiar faces. But the worst symptom by far has to be my thought process. Or lack of a thought process...

I dont have thoughts at all, theres NO inner monologue going on in my head. This affects me in numerous ways ..I cant process information, especially when peple talk to me.. I cant have a normal conversation because I dont have a train of thought to put a sentence together.. people try to tell me something but the words

dont register in my brain because theres no thought process, its like i dont understand english anymore... Reading, Watching tv listning to music is all affected.. i cant follow any of them ... I cant think things thru at all.. I dont know what to do anymore.. how am i supposed to live life if i have no thoughts..

when i try and talk i stutter and fumble words because its like im putting a sentence together on the spot without thinking it thru.

Is there anything anyone has done to help these symptoms? Does anyone else have this as bad as me?

I didnt have this symptom 5 years ago... Its like my dp/dr symptoms are getting worse... Im only at year 10.. shit what am i gonna b e like in 20 years if im this bad now.. I spent 6 months in a psyche ward because things got so bad.. I need help here...


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## Tommygunz

I've always theorized that that symptom is quite similar to advanced dementia like alzheimers. If that's the case then it might be if interest to you to look into working on your dopamine levels and function. I don't remember what caused your DP or what activities you partake in now that could affect such things but maybe looking into it, youncould find a connection.


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## Guest

Optimusrhyme said:


> I know kenny made a post about this a cuple weeks ago but im gonna re-post it.
> 
> Ive had dp/dr for ten years 24/7.. Ive got all the Symptoms.. feeling detacched from my body, horrible perception shifts, feeling unreal, not recognizing familiar faces. But the worst symptom by far has to be my thought process. Or lack of a thought process...
> 
> I dont have thoughts at all, theres NO inner monologue going on in my head. This affects me in numerous ways ..I cant process information, especially when peple talk to me.. I cant have a normal conversation because I dont have a train of thought to put a sentence together.. people try to tell me something but the words
> 
> dont register in my brain because theres no thought process, its like i dont understand english anymore... Reading, Watching tv listning to music is all affected.. i cant follow any of them ... I cant think things thru at all.. I dont know what to do anymore.. how am i supposed to live life if i have no thoughts..
> 
> when i try and talk i stutter and fumble words because its like im putting a sentence together on the spot without thinking it thru.
> 
> Is there anything anyone has done to help these symptoms? Does anyone else have this as bad as me?
> 
> I didnt have this symptom 5 years ago... Its like my dp/dr symptoms are getting worse... Im only at year 10.. shit what am i gonna b e like in 20 years if im this bad now.. I spent 6 months in a psyche ward because things got so bad.. I need help here...


Are you fragmented? I ask this because if I'm feeling fragmented I can also feel like my brain function is virtually non existant.


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## optimusrhyme

Philos said:


> Are you fragmented? I ask this because if I'm feeling fragmented I can also feel like my brain function is virtually non existant.


Im not sure exactly what you meen by "fragmented".. could you explain in more detail ?


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## Surfingisfun001

I remember the first thing I told my family when I started having problems was that I couldn't think. The sad thing is that no one believes me when I tell them this.


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## peachy

i feel this so much. one of my very worst symptoms. it's amazing we had conversations in chi town all 3 of us seeing as none of us have a thought process ahaha.


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## Guest

Peachy,
Good to hear you had a meet up!

Man, these days ... and yeah I'm the oooooooollllllddddd DPer here ... I just curse my brain. It reminds me again of a sentence in maybe the DSM-III that in describing DP noted "recall may be difficult or slow."

Don't know why they removed that, but that is how I have been my entire life. My brain sometimes feels like concrete. I will say, I notice it more when I'm very depressed, and I am now. But I have about 12 reasons to be depressed. But I was depressed as a child. I am intelligent, did well in my private school and yet had severe trouble with concentration, remembering things. Some years my grades were all over the place. University nearly killed me. I basically studied, ate and slept all the time. No energy for much else. Almost gave up on the Graduate Record Exam for my MA, yet though I thought I did horribly I did OK -- enough to get into and complete grad school. I don't think at 52 I could pass that exam now however.

_*One comment, this is not like Alzheimer's.*_ My mother had Alzheimer's and slowly deteriorated from it over a period of about 15 years. Short term memory loss is DRAMATIC. It isn't this sluggish, concrete brain feeling ... I have at least. When my mother forgot something. She forgot that she forgot.

Mother: "Did we get creamer at the store? I can't find it."
Me: "Yes, it's in the back of the refrigerator."
Mother: "Oh, yes."

_*5 minutes later:*_

Mother: "Did we get creamer at the store? I can't find it."
Me: "Yes, it's in the back of the refrigerator."
Mother: "Oh, yes."

_*Repeat 10 times. Then she forgets about the creamer.*_

When things got bad, and I mean bad enough she needed 24/7 custodial care in a locked facility, she could not say who the President of the US was (at the time), where she was (though she had been on staff at that hospital as a physician), what time of year it was (Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter), didn't understand the concept of time, didn't know if it was day or night. Mainly she lived a life as if she were waking up over and over again. It was horrible. She ultimately forgot everything, including who SHE was. Your short and long term memory deteriorate, and you have physical symptoms of loss of physical coordination as well.

God, I wish my brain would work properly!


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## Surfingisfun001

peachy said:


> it's amazing we had conversations in chi town all 3 of us seeing as none of us have a thought process ahaha.


that's the thing. and that's the reason that people do not understand and believe this. a better way of communicating this is needed. but i can't do that, seeing as what i need in order to do that is lacking. so what to make of this? how did we have conversations with each other. all 3 of us understand, yet how do you explain that to someone on the outs (prison slang for "outside").


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## Clark

Hey there I have had all those symptoms, mabey not exactly the same but yah I relate, I could barely talk, thoughts were gone, I was gone, everything is fragmented out of myself 24/7 except for yoga and when i engaged in something enough.. I have had dp for 19 years off and on. Never new what it was for the longest time. have had pretty bad panic too. My last bad episode with dp has been about 3 months now. along with the intense severe depresion i didnt think i was going to make it this time. I feel for you. It is a living hell take care.


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## optimusrhyme

surfingisfun001 said:


> that's the thing. and that's the reason that people do not understand and believe this. a better way of communicating this is needed. but i can't do that, seeing as what i need in order to do that is lacking. so what to make of this? how did we have conversations with each other. all 3 of us understand, yet how do you explain that to someone on the outs (prison slang for "outside").


I dunno man I dont think anyone on the outs can understood this unless they have exprienced it... What a sad fate that we gotta live with this bullshit...
The only time I have felt good in the past cuple years is honestly when I was with you and jinelle, because you guys understood me and didnt judge.

I guess i posted this thread on here looking for an answer. But i know in my heart there isnt an answer to any of this shit.


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## Guest

Optimusrhyme said:


> Im not sure exactly what you meen by "fragmented".. could you explain in more detail ?


Sorry it took so long to reply to your question re above.

I couldn't put the answer in words myself as i'm having a very difficult time at the moment but I found a link which looks like a pretty good description on fragmentation.

http://insidetherapy.blogspot.com/2006/08/mind-integrated-and-fragmented.html

I also wrote a post a while back on 'fragmentation and bits' and here's a link to that also,

http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/25904-fragmentation-and-bits/page__p__220235__fromsearch__1#entry220235

I hope this is of some help to you.


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## Dhj86

Dreamer* said:


> Peachy,
> Good to hear you had a meet up!
> 
> Man, these days ... and yeah I'm the oooooooollllllddddd DPer here ... I just curse my brain. It reminds me again of a sentence in maybe the DSM-III that in describing DP noted "recall may be difficult or slow."
> 
> Don't know why they removed that, but that is how I have been my entire life. My brain sometimes feels like concrete. I will say, I notice it more when I'm very depressed, and I am now. But I have about 12 reasons to be depressed. But I was depressed as a child. I am intelligent, did well in my private school and yet had severe trouble with concentration, remembering things. Some years my grades were all over the place. University nearly killed me. I basically studied, ate and slept all the time. No energy for much else. Almost gave up on the Graduate Record Exam for my MA, yet though I thought I did horribly I did OK -- enough to get into and complete grad school. I don't think at 52 I could pass that exam now however.
> 
> _*One comment, this is not like Alzheimer's.*_ My mother had Alzheimer's and slowly deteriorated from it over a period of about 15 years. Short term memory loss is DRAMATIC. It isn't this sluggish, concrete brain feeling ... I have at least. When my mother forgot something. She forgot that she forgot.
> 
> Mother: "Did we get creamer at the store? I can't find it."
> Me: "Yes, it's in the back of the refrigerator."
> Mother: "Oh, yes."
> 
> _*5 minutes later:*_
> 
> Mother: "Did we get creamer at the store? I can't find it."
> Me: "Yes, it's in the back of the refrigerator."
> Mother: "Oh, yes."
> 
> _*Repeat 10 times. Then she forgets about the creamer.*_
> 
> When things got bad, and I mean bad enough she needed 24/7 custodial care in a locked facility, she could not say who the President of the US was (at the time), where she was (though she had been on staff at that hospital as a physician), what time of year it was (Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter), didn't understand the concept of time, didn't know if it was day or night. Mainly she lived a life as if she were waking up over and over again. It was horrible. She ultimately forgot everything, including who SHE was. Your short and long term memory deteriorate, and you have physical symptoms of loss of physical coordination as well.
> 
> God, I wish my brain would work properly!


I know it's a very minor detail but what's creamer?


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## wouhou

hi, i say everytime at my psych : i don't think but i can think. (blank mind but i can think sometimes it's difficult when i'm really anxious..)

But everytime i have problem to speak i eat the words when i speak most of time..


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## Aridity

surfingisfun001 said:


> I remember the first thing I told my family when I started having problems was that I couldn't think. The sad thing is that no one believes me when I tell them this.


Holy shit,that's exactly what I told my mother to,like EXACTLY. And she said how can't you think,and I replied I can think but I'm not REALLY thinking. I FUCKING DONT KNOW FUCK THIS BULLSHIT DR/DP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm going fucking nuts.


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## lostsoul

I have exactly this problem for a loooonnnng time without really being anxious anymore








Perhaps it is caused by my autism (asperger). I got diagnosed with this but many doubt it, I think they are seeing my chronic depersonalisation as autism.

I could use some people arround me that have the same thinking issues so I feel less lonely in this. Anyone has Yahoo messenger here? My user id is johanstruijk82;

Hugs to all.


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## whiterabbit

Hi yes, have just replied on the Unable to Think thread.

Am happy to meet with anyone in London, UK - if it might help - am an old pro at this horrible Godawful condition, started in childhood now 47. It is very very hard to overcome, especially if it is ingrained in your psyche from a young age.

Hang on in there - it will pass, its just an Utter B*****d while it resides...

I salute you Brave Soldiers.

Caritas Abundat

Sarah XX


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## Surfingisfun001

lostsoul said:


> I have exactly this problem for a loooonnnng time without really being anxious anymore
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Perhaps it is caused by my autism (asperger). I got diagnosed with this but many doubt it, I think they are seeing my chronic depersonalisation as autism.
> 
> I could use some people arround me that have the same thinking issues so I feel less lonely in this. Anyone has Yahoo messenger here? My user id is johanstruijk82;
> 
> Hugs to all.


Hey I remember talking to you a bit before. I just added you on Yahoo. Funny, I had something that I remember you talking about a long time ago and wanted to ask you something. Hope to see you on Yahoo.


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## whiterabbit

Hi yes, sorry folks, god knows why but can't receive any PMs it seems, cos my inbox is full - can't work it out.

So if you want to make off-site contact you can catch me at [email protected] or Facebook under the name Sarah Wheeler with the ID photo of a park bench in memoriam plaque to my friend Heloise..

Caritas Abundat

Sarah XX


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## mezona

Anybody in here got better with this?


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## Ningen

The OP (optimusrhyme) has recovered from the blank mind: http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/52233-recovery-stage/ (the second post)


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## mezona

Does he say anything about the blank mind?


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## Ningen

Well in his posts he complained mostly about the blank mind, though I am not exactly sure what precisely cured him (possibly meditation) http://www.dpselfhelp.com/forum/index.php?/topic/52010-some-inspiration/ (fourth post).


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## Alex617

Do you do any drugs and/or take medication?


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## mezona

Me? I take medication, yes.


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## TimMis

mezona said:


> Me? I take medication, yes.


Stop that if it dosent work


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## mezona

I used to take that for my anxiety... but this feels so much different than anxiety... But I believe anxiety and insomnia is what brought this state...

I don't feel responsible for myself, I just don't feel HERE, it's hard to explain.

Any suggestions?


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## TimMis

mezona said:


> I used to take that for my anxiety... but this feels so much different than anxiety... But I believe anxiety and insomnia is what brought this state...
> I don't feel responsible for myself, I just don't feel HERE, it's hard to explain.
> Any suggestions?


Yes stop medication. Start Living and meditation/mindfulness/hypnosis


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## mezona

But I dom't feel HERE, there is no inner monologue going on...


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## Gazzy001

This is weird I have this too. But you can think. It's seems dulled tho.


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## mezona

Do you? Like theres no inner monologue? How can you function with that?


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## dutas

im like this too. my whole thought process is very reactionary. most of my thoughts are a response to what i hear, feel or see. i have no idea why though


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## mezona

Bump


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## Midnight

There is a thought process, otherwise you wouldn't be able to formulate sentences or sentence structure.


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## ThoughtOnFire

Midnight said:


> There is a thought process, otherwise you wouldn't be able to formulate sentences or sentence structure.


What about when you have a brain fart and you say "I just lost my train of thought" ?


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## Pondererer

ThoughtOnFire said:


> What about when you have a brain fart and you say "I just lost my train of thought" ?


That sort of blew my mind lol.

Just wanted to say that starting doing something else lightheartedly is a way for me to sort of collect my mind agian. (then whatever i was doing before)


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## Staceb

optimusrhyme said:


> I know kenny made a post about this a cuple weeks ago but im gonna re-post it.
> 
> Ive had dp/dr for ten years 24/7.. Ive got all the Symptoms.. feeling detacched from my body, horrible perception shifts, feeling unreal, not recognizing familiar faces. But the worst symptom by far has to be my thought process. Or lack of a thought process...
> 
> I dont have thoughts at all, theres NO inner monologue going on in my head. This affects me in numerous ways ..I cant process information, especially when peple talk to me.. I cant have a normal conversation because I dont have a train of thought to put a sentence together.. people try to tell me something but the words
> 
> dont register in my brain because theres no thought process, its like i dont understand english anymore... Reading, Watching tv listning to music is all affected.. i cant follow any of them ... I cant think things thru at all.. I dont know what to do anymore.. how am i supposed to live life if i have no thoughts..
> 
> when i try and talk i stutter and fumble words because its like im putting a sentence together on the spot without thinking it thru.
> 
> Is there anything anyone has done to help these symptoms? Does anyone else have this as bad as me?
> 
> I didnt have this symptom 5 years ago... Its like my dp/dr symptoms are getting worse... Im only at year 10.. shit what am i gonna b e like in 20 years if im this bad now.. I spent 6 months in a psyche ward because things got so bad.. I need help here...


Have you found anything that's helped yet because I don't have any thoughts


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## ajajr

Would like an answer too for this blank mind...it's been affecting me for 4 years.
I don't experience "out of body experience" or other mentioned symptoms associated with DP...I don't know if this is even DP..


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