# dp and military



## Strangerdanger (Oct 3, 2010)

Just wondering what fellow dp sufferers thoughts on joining the military would be. Not your opinion about the military. Just if you think you would be able to go through with it while feeling "unreal" and shit. I am considering it and have been for awhile but that was before my dp became so severe. I guess it depends on the person. but the question i am asking is could YOU do it?


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

My ex husband was in the military and honestly, I don't think someone with dp is capable of handling it. First and foremost you have to go through a medical and mental health examination. If you manage to pass and go into basic training, you are in for hell. They spend all day, every day, in your face screaming at you. They keep you on less than 4 hours of sleep a night, exercise you until you collapse and regulate your meal times. Often they give you 5 minutes to swallow without chewing everything on your plate. You are not allowed contact with an family members for the first 3 weeks and then only allowed phone calls and letters once a week after. Once you get into the actual military, you have no choice in what hours you have to work, what conditions you work in, where you are deployed, and for how long. My ex had to work manditory 16 hour days standing outside in -20 weather.

I honestly feel that with all of the mental and physical demands on a person, it is not probably that someone with do could function in the military.


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## sonnl (Apr 15, 2009)

the day my dp clears up is the same day i enlist, its been my goal my whole life. theirs some guy i was talking to on here a while back who was in the army when dp hit, and it went away. I really think I could do it even with dp, im just worried about being so spaced out in situations that you really cant be.


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## FoXS (Nov 4, 2009)

ustabetinyfairypeople said:


> They keep you on less than 4 hours of sleep a night, exercise you until you collapse and regulate your meal times. Often they give you 5 minutes to swallow without chewing everything on your plate.


"youre in the Army now, woohohooo, youre in the army now." hahaha. 
this seems horrible. i dont think that German army is so inhuman


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## voidvoid (Sep 5, 2008)

Preparing for war or conducting war is never a good thing. Unless it is the title of an album by Darkthrone. Only exception. *When you train to be a soldier you train to depersonalize/dehumanize both yourself and the people you are trained to kill. *


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## PhuckDP (Dec 8, 2010)

FoXS said:


> "youre in the Army now, woohohooo, youre in the army now." hahaha.
> this seems horrible. i dont think that German army is so inhuman


Yes it is. All armies are. They just have their ways. The goal is to turn you into a weapon so to speak. It's why they do all that stuff, cuz what they want is to first ruin you and then rebuild you their own way. So there's a lot of humiliating brainwashing stuff going on there. What army wants to teach is not to think but just do. It's why they do all that stuff. I have no idea how someone with DP would handle it. I think people with DP might actually handle it better than others unless they also have panic attacks, anxiety etc. 
Let's face it, the whole DP condition is a lot like people being in war. We're numb, we don't have a lot of senses and our mind is constantly overworked. There are a lot of similarities between DP and PTSD which is very common for soldiers so actually there's quite a lot of common ground for people in the military and DP sufferers IMO. So basically, a lot of those insanse humiliating stuff...someone with DP might not even feel it. DP, just like army..is quite extreme.


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## Klerob (Dec 28, 2010)

Was in the Air Force so let me give you some advice. Depending on what medicines you have taken, they might not let you in. If a condition happens while you are in, then you are fine. I would talk to a recruiter first to make sure you do not get your hopes up. They will probably send you to a MEPS station to get you checked out by doctors. Just some FYI


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## Strangerdanger (Oct 3, 2010)

PhuckDP said:


> Yes it is. All armies are. They just have their ways. The goal is to turn you into a weapon so to speak. It's why they do all that stuff, cuz what they want is to first ruin you and then rebuild you their own way. So there's a lot of humiliating brainwashing stuff going on there. What army wants to teach is not to think but just do. It's why they do all that stuff. I have no idea how someone with DP would handle it. I think people with DP might actually handle it better than others unless they also have panic attacks, anxiety etc.
> Let's face it, the whole DP condition is a lot like people being in war. We're numb, we don't have a lot of senses and our mind is constantly overworked. There are a lot of similarities between DP and PTSD which is very common for soldiers so actually there's quite a lot of common ground for people in the military and DP sufferers IMO. So basically, a lot of those insanse humiliating stuff...someone with DP might not even feel it. DP, just like army..is quite extreme.


That is exactly what I was thinking. People yelling in my face and all that,it doesn't seem like it could even phase me! I am emotionless I feel like I might just watch it happen as if it's a movie and try not to laugh for 3 months... I can't feel anything. Then When it's over with I can get my schooling paid for. But then again I could be wrong and fall apart while I'm there. who knows its a tough decision and maybe one I shouldnt be making when I'm so disconnected from real life.


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## ValleyGirl (Nov 10, 2017)

Strangerdanger said:


> That is exactly what I was thinking. People yelling in my face and all that,it doesn't seem like it could even phase me! I am emotionless I feel like I might just watch it happen as if it's a movie and try not to laugh for 3 months... I can't feel anything. Then When it's over with I can get my schooling paid for. But then again I could be wrong and fall apart while I'm there. who knows its a tough decision and maybe one I shouldnt be making when I'm so disconnected from real life.


Trust me, even with horrible dp, when you feel like you have no emotions, someone in your face screwing with you does affect you. My ex husband is abusive and when he'd get in my face screaming my dp would make me completely unable to function. I'd go into this completely spaced out place. All I could do was lay on the bed and go off into this land in my head. I couldn't keep my mind focused on reality. I'm just saying that having dp, having a massive lack of sleep, massive physical over exertion, and inadequate food is a horrible combination.


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## pacifique (Dec 24, 2010)

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## feelingunreal (Dec 29, 2010)

So I'm new here and I just want to introduce myself.
I'm 18 years old, male, living in Montreal, Quebec and I have been suffering from DP for about 5 months now.

I used to have DP "episodes," but now it's full-blown, 24/7, and it's unbearable. I remember how the episodes used to be. I would be going about my daily routine and the next thing I knew I couldn't remember what I had just done or who I was. I would sit down, regain my thoughts and get over it, with a kind of "fog" left in my brain. It didn't last too long though. I have always been a major control freak when it comes to my brain and my own thoughts, so when that would happen it really wouldn't sit well and at times it would make me sick.

Despite the constant need I had for self-control, I finally convinced myself that I should get out and experiment with things. It was during a confusing time in my life and I started to care a lot less about myself and about what others thought. I started experimenting with marijuana since it really wasn't difficult to get my hands on the stuff. To my surprise, I actually enjoyed it. It calmed me down, and when I was high I enjoyed absolutely everything. I didn't do it often... maybe 6 or 7 times. I didn't know what a "bad-trip" felt like and I was convinced that I was one of those people who could smoke weed their entire life (on occasion) and never experience any negative effects. I was wrong.

On prom night of this year, me and my friends got a hotel room and went completely wild. I drank more than I had ever done before and then to top it off, I went outside and smoked with a group of people I hardly knew. Immediately after I smoked I knew something was wrong. Suddenly I wanted that control back... but it was impossible to regain. I continued to party like everyone else, but on the inside I desperately just wanted it to be over. I kept telling myself that it's only weed, it'll be over tomorrow. The next morning when I woke up in that trashed hotel room, I felt horrible. I still felt high, and I was extremely hungover. The following three days I felt equally as high and completely freaked out. I was convinced I had developed schizophrenia and contemplated killing myself. Then on the fourth day, it disappeared. I was so glad it was gone, and told myself that I would never smoke again.

I didn't stand by this promise and actually ingested pot brownies during the summer. That was the biggest mistake of my life. Ever since I have felt the same feeling I felt the first three days after prom night.

So much is happening right now but nothing is affecting me... yet every little insignificant thing affects me so much. It's like there is such an overflow of senses that I end up feeling nothing, feeling numb. I forget what it's like to be normal, to experience reality like it's actually real. When I try to focus on something, I can for a moment. But then its like my brain focuses too hard on that one thing, and everything else becomes a blur, and so much information is being processed that i end up with nothing. Basically what Im feeling is too many feelings, until there isn't any feeling left in me at all... complete and utter emotional numbness. I feel like I'm just going through the motions, but me...the real ME, is doing absolutely nothing...it's like the real me died and the memory i have of the real me is the only thing i have left to connect to the real world. I have no motivation at all... I can't work. I can't do anything...or at least thats how I feel. Then my body goes ahead and does it...and I forget so easily about what I do because it's as if I'm not even consciously doing it.

I suddenly have extreme anxiety and suicidal thoughts. I will randomly experience blurred vision and will actually tear up at some points. I'm constantly shaking, on edge, worried, scared, angry and just purely negative. I can't go on with my job if I'm going to be like this... I can't go on with anything. I really just want my life back and I wish I had never made the stupid mistakes that have brought me here.


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## insaticiable (Feb 23, 2010)

feelingunreal said:


> So I'm new here and I just want to introduce myself.
> I'm 18 years old, male, living in Montreal, Quebec and I have been suffering from DP for about 5 months now.
> 
> I used to have DP "episodes," but now it's full-blown, 24/7, and it's unbearable. I remember how the episodes used to be. I would be going about my daily routine and the next thing I knew I couldn't remember what I had just done or who I was. I would sit down, regain my thoughts and get over it, with a kind of "fog" left in my brain. It didn't last too long though. I have always been a major control freak when it comes to my brain and my own thoughts, so when that would happen it really wouldn't sit well and at times it would make me sick.
> ...


Man, I can relate to this SO fucking much, especially the second to last paragraph. You are not alone, my friend!


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## oceansdoorway (Nov 10, 2010)

feelingunreal said:


> So I'm new here and I just want to introduce myself.
> I'm 18 years old, male, living in Montreal, Quebec and I have been suffering from DP for about 5 months now.
> 
> I used to have DP "episodes," but now it's full-blown, 24/7, and it's unbearable. I remember how the episodes used to be. I would be going about my daily routine and the next thing I knew I couldn't remember what I had just done or who I was. I would sit down, regain my thoughts and get over it, with a kind of "fog" left in my brain. It didn't last too long though. I have always been a major control freak when it comes to my brain and my own thoughts, so when that would happen it really wouldn't sit well and at times it would make me sick.
> ...


I wanted to cry while reading this because that is exactly how I feel to and my first experience with weed caused me something similar to what you went through for three or four days and I promised myself Id never smoke again but I did and it put me permanently into this hell. But on another note I meet with the Air Force recruiter on Wednesday I really need them to pay for college. I really want to get into the Air Force Security Forces. I'm not even going to mention my condition or previous treatment. I stopped my meds a couple of weeks ago. I realized that the meds helped with some things but they also made some things 10 times worse and I didnt realize it till after I stopped taking them. I know that I can handle the Military and the stress with my condition. It will be hard but I am determined and I know I can handle it.


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## Cacophony_of_whispers (Jan 9, 2011)

thinking of joining the Air Force myself...

In a non-combat capacity, this is why i have not seen a doctor yet because I don't want my medical record to interfere with my future options.


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## oceansdoorway (Nov 10, 2010)

Cacophony_of_whispers said:


> thinking of joining the Air Force myself...
> 
> In a non-combat capacity, this is why i have not seen a doctor yet because I don't want my medical record to interfere with my future options.


I see. In the US all medical records are private and they cant access them without our consent otherwise they would be breaking the law but if they find out we lied about anything we are screwed under code UCMJ


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## sonnl (Apr 15, 2009)

oceansdoorway said:


> I see. In the US all medical records are private and they cant access them without our consent otherwise they would be breaking the law but if they find out we lied about anything we are screwed under code UCMJ


this is not true, all your medical records are open to the government when you try and enlist. im in the same boat as the other guy who said 'this is the reason i havent seen a doctor'.


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## Cacophony_of_whispers (Jan 9, 2011)

sonnl said:


> this is not true, all your medical records are open to the government when you try and enlist. im in the same boat as the other guy who said 'this is the reason i havent seen a doctor'.


Sucks complete balls doesn't it?


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