# Re-personalization moments from journaling traumas



## Guest (Mar 18, 2014)

I journaled some traumas last night (the ones I could more easily remember) before I went to bed, but eventually felt disturbed.... kinda like "Oh shit no wonder I have still have DP". I viewed things more from my current knowledge of disorganized attachment, BPD, and codepency in hopes of sparking some epiphanies - "Why did I react to _____ like ______."

Once I got off work today I had a re-personalization moment on the drive back home. It wasn't like "Oh what a nice day... whatever."... I felt like a part of that day! I could feel the sunlight... and I caught chills to the song I was listening to.

Nothing too intense that made me believe I was anywhere near fully recovered, but I was like "Okay, I think I've triggered something."


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## Guest (Mar 18, 2014)

Vortimi said:


> Can you share something?


Hmmm. I can't remember much of my childhood except strict parents lol. But high school was shit. I journaled about that. I remembered my social anxiety was slowly starting to take over my life (after two years since I had gotten DP) I started avoiding people and skipping lunch. Everyday felt like torture

One day a friend told me "You used to be fun, what happened?"

My heart sank and I kinda just froze... That moment might not be trauma from emotional abuse... but that was something that was very hard for me to grasp.

I'm a lot better with anxiety nowadays, and I now realize I sort of misinterpreted my friend's compassion. *He was worried about me... but I saw him as a threat*. And that sounds a lot like disorganized attachment now. I wanted to trust people, but felt like I couldn't.


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## Abe89 (Jul 31, 2018)

time2wakeup said:


> I did a lot of writing the weekend before last about things that have happened over the last few years,


I think writing (in a journal or a blog) is a better way to express your thoughts and emotions as opposed to talking to someone.

For me the time spent in quiet introspection has been very helpful. I feel peaceful and I've a feeling of compassion towards myself when writing down thoughts about my life.


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