# I THINK IM DEAD!!!!!!



## Guest (May 15, 2009)

Im litterally starting to think im dead. I went and played guitar with some guys at my church tonight and I DID NOT feel like I was even there at all, I was somewhere else!!!! I dont feel that I exist anymore. I can VISIBLY see the disconnection that I feel. As im typing this right now, I dont feel like Iim doing anything but seeing it happen. Im not doing anything. I live inside my head and watch in a dream as my life happens automaticaly. This is freaking UNBELIEVABLE, I cant believe that this ferocious thing has happened to me and that I cant do anything to stop it!!!. One day im hopefull that I will get through this so I get a BIG HEAD and take a leap like tonight and go out and do something that is supposed to be fun, And a disaster occurs in my head that no one else knows about but me. I......................HATE..................THIS......................FREAKING........................DISCONNECTION!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :? :x :evil:


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## Surfingisfun001 (Sep 25, 2007)

One thing I try to keep in mind is how much things change each year. Disconnection does suck but fortunately things are always changing. I don't think your dead but if you are then that would mean I am too. This however cannot be true because if you were dead you would be in heaven not hell/dp'd right? :wink:


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## egodeath (Oct 27, 2008)

You're not dead, you're depersonalized, remember?
Dead people aren't DP'd.


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## SistA HazeL (Aug 10, 2008)

eduEDU1 said:


> Im litterally starting to think im dead. I went and played guitar with some guys at my church tonight and I DID NOT feel like I was even there at all, I was somewhere else!!!! I dont feel that I exist anymore. I can VISIBLY see the disconnection that I feel. As im typing this right now, I dont feel like Iim doing anything but seeing it happen. Im not doing anything. I live inside my head and watch in a dream as my life happens automaticaly. This is freaking UNBELIEVABLE, I cant believe that this ferocious thing has happened to me and that I cant do anything to stop it!!!. One day im hopefull that I will get through this so I get a BIG HEAD and take a leap like tonight and go out and do something that is supposed to be fun, And a disaster occurs in my head that no one else knows about but me. I......................HATE..................THIS......................FREAKING........................DISCONNECTION!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :? :x :evil:


Oh dear.. i feel ya coz this happens to me all the time! Detached, disconnected and whatnot. it's HELL indeed


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## Guest (May 15, 2009)

You _wish_ you were dead. No, you're not dead, you've got DP. Which is much, much worse. I have it too. We should form a motorcycle gang and beat up squares (and any other shapes we encounter). Yeah, why not.


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## desperona (May 14, 2009)

I never thought I would be dead, but Ive thought many times that this is a dream, but not this "feeling-like-this-is-a-dream" only. when I thought some things, and other people said just the things Ive thought, I really thought that maybe I should try and kill myself and see, if I can wake up. Im happy Im not thinking that way anymore. still waiting for my "normal" body.


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## Guest (May 15, 2009)

I feel exactly the same way. This is 24/7 for me. People say you couldn't have died, your communicating. Or if you were dead I would be too. How about all the lost souls who died violently, or who weren't prepared to die, stuck in limbo. How can we be sure this is not what's happening to us? And everybody we come into contact with is just a figment of our imagination.


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## Guest (May 15, 2009)

Thanks you guys for your input. I would reply to all of you individually but im just not feelin it today. im pissed because my mom left me a note when she went to work basically calling me a drug addict and took my xanax because i took one more than i was supposed to because I felt so bad yesterday. she left me one and i usually take two as soon as I wake up. She has no clue what im going through but she thinks its ok to judge me and tell me that I dont need my medicine and i need to go into a program and get off of it. HAHAHA!!!!! I took that note and burned it. im really getting sick of everything.  :x


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## egodeath (Oct 27, 2008)

DpDream said:


> I feel exactly the same way. This is 24/7 for me. People say you couldn't have died, your communicating. Or if you were dead I would be too. How about all the lost souls who died violently, or who weren't prepared to die, stuck in limbo. How can we be sure this is not what's happening to us? And everybody we come into contact with is just a figment of our imagination.


What's the difference? Either you're dead or you're alive, and if you're walking around, trying to deal with shit, you're probably alive.

Option 1) Dead
Option 2) Alive
Option 3) Dead but not sure
Option 4) Alive but not sure

Option 4 is the most likely. If you REALLY want to be certain, though, stick a loaded shotgun in your mouth. It's a very good test because once you pull the trigger you can be certain of option 1, but it's not so useful.


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## konstantine02 (Mar 12, 2009)

I know that shit all too well.

Even though I'm "recovering." If I think long and hard about feeling that way, then I actually start to um, have that experience. Ugh. Like right now I'm like, am I really typing this? Luckily, it doesn't put me into a panic attack when I think like this anymore. Then I convince myself I'm alive somehow.

Like, if I was dead, would I really be feeling this fan blowing on my legs next to me? Would I feel hot and annoyed because it's really hot in the house I'm in right now? If I didn't have feelings, or answers to these things, then I would start to worry. Something in my brain is functioning, which means I'm not dead.

This post may not make sense, but hopefully it does.


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## Guest (May 17, 2009)

konstantine02 said:


> I know that shit all too well.
> 
> Even though I'm "recovering." If I think long and hard about feeling that way, then I actually start to um, have that experience. Ugh. Like right now I'm like, am I really typing this? Luckily, it doesn't put me into a panic attack when I think like this anymore. Then I convince myself I'm alive somehow.
> 
> ...


it makes perfect sense and thank you for sharing.  the more you guys reply, the less I feel like jumping off a bridge just to make sure.


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## jmdavid (May 17, 2009)

Dude, it totally sucks. The worst part is when you are talking to someone, and you want to focus and actually care about what they are saying but really all you can hear are your own thoughts. But those thoughts aren't even really yours, you just observe them. It really is the worst condition ever.


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## Guest (May 18, 2009)

jmdavid said:


> Dude, it totally sucks. The worst part is when you are talking to someone, and you want to focus and actually care about what they are saying but really all you can hear are your own thoughts. But those thoughts aren't even really yours, you just observe them. It really is the worst condition ever.


YES..........IT............IS!!!!!!!!!! :evil:


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