# Empty



## EverDream (Dec 15, 2006)

Well, after watching the first episode of Dexter, I'm back to my emptiness. I like the quiet there is at night and I like listening to songs then but I also get scared. I feel very alone. I feel I'm already dead in so many levels. I'm scared.


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

EverDream said:


> Well, after watching the first episode of Dexter, I'm back to my emptiness. I like the quiet there is at night and I like listening to songs then but I also get scared. I feel very alone. I feel I'm already dead in so many levels. I'm scared.


Sometimes I love the quiet there is in the night, the peace, so intense that it almost gets physical, but then once in a while I get extremely depressed and it's horrible at night, no1 to talk to, empty as you said, alone with my scary thoughts.. I get you


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## EverDream (Dec 15, 2006)

PositiveThinking! said:


> Sometimes I love the quiet there is in the night, the peace, so intense that it almost gets physical, but then once in a while I get extremely depressed and it's horrible at night, no1 to talk to, empty as you said, alone with my scary thoughts.. I get you


I pretend that I'm alive. It's like I'm on my own seperated world all the time. I'm so tired living this way but also too tired of trying changing things.

Yesterday I went out with friends. I was listening to everything they said but it seemed meaningless to me. I didn't care.


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## EverDream (Dec 15, 2006)

I know people here don't like this negativity but I don't fucking care. I truly feel this year is gonna be my last one.
And I feel like I have to scream, punch things, cry... But I can't and I won't. I probably go to sleep soon.


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## Olivia (Aug 8, 2010)

ive felt dead also. i even get confused because my speech will feel stuck in this tense where i dont exist. my thoughts dont exist, before i really sat down to undestand dp, it was seperate from me. i guess i just wanted to add that your not alone


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

EverDream said:


> I know people here don't like this negativity but I don't fucking care. I truly feel this year is gonna be my last one.
> And I feel like I have to scream, punch things, cry... But I can't and I won't. I probably go to sleep soon.


If they don't like negativity, they should leave the forum because we're here to help each other when we feel down, hang in there I know some days are really tough to deal with


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## EverDream (Dec 15, 2006)

Olives said:


> ive felt dead also. i even get confused because my speech will feel stuck in this tense where i dont exist. my thoughts dont exist, before i really sat down to undestand dp, it was seperate from me. i guess i just wanted to add that your not alone


Thanks


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## EverDream (Dec 15, 2006)

PositiveThinking! said:


> If they don't like negativity, they should leave the forum because we're here to help each other when we feel down, hang in there I know some days are really tough to deal with


You are really sweet! I feel better today.
My two best friends also going through hard times now. One broke up with her boyfriend and the other deals with her parents divorce right now. Life is so complicated.


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## PositiveThinking! (Mar 5, 2010)

EverDream said:


> You are really sweet! I feel better today.
> My two best friends also going through hard times now. One broke up with her boyfriend and the other deals with her parents divorce right now. Life is so complicated.


Yeah, but good days are always around the corner so it's always worth it


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