# existential thoughts plague me



## Fernoso716 (Oct 13, 2012)

My dp Is starting to go away except for existing questions.... why am I who I am.....wat if I was someone else. I wouldnt exist....freaks me out...


----------



## Mel anie (Jan 10, 2012)

You are who you are when you are not thinking about who you are.


----------



## sherlock (Sep 30, 2011)

know this feeling.

I myself have been feeling quite a lot better (not 100% but at least 75% recovered, or just distracted?) but now I can feel it coming back to me again. especially the existential thoughts and fear that freaks me out to no end.

what I do? focus on times when I didn't have this fear and anxiety... when everything seemed normal. just a week ago I was able to think about existential questions without freaking the hell out or getting dp/dr'd out of my mind. don't know what changed.


----------



## mipmunk40 (Nov 13, 2012)

when the DP is completely gone, the "who am I" won't mean anything, you will know who you are. If "Who am I" bothers you when you still have DP. When it doesn't bother you anymore and you have your complete sense of self, it won't mean anything. Hope this helps.


----------



## Ivan Hawk (Jan 22, 2010)

I personally feel close to the idea that no energy - not even that of what fuels consciousness - is truly lost but merely scattered and cycled.
We know our physical energy only goes somewhere else, what's to say the conscious energy is just that of the illusive energy in our universe that moves to another mind that needs it.

In theory of the universe - there was a time when 0 had more value than 0. There was a time when nothingness became something. And even in birth, that nothingness becomes something now. The physical body is due to the reproduction of the correct materials that cause human growth, but the very fabric of conscious energy is something that - as far as the physical world knows - came from nothing.
Perhaps the "reason" for consciousness doesn't come from nothing...atleast now. But there was a time before science and the ultimate first creation of the universe and everything where - as far as our universal logic goes - nothing became something.

Perhaps there is a universal force of illusion in the universe that has a license to bend and surpass various - if not all - laws of our physical universe. Why else does life act so strange sometimes with events like birth, death & then back to life anomalies, etc.

To go back to your original thought on self - I say you need not worry of not existing at all before or after life.


----------



## Samaral (Mar 26, 2012)

Me too, I still have them on the daily, sometimes I feel automatic then I remind myself how freaky it all is then detach from my surroundings. Even now as I type, as soon as I start thinking about it, it is like I lose my identity.


----------



## Fernoso716 (Oct 13, 2012)

Smh I hate this. ..the thoughts are killing me

..smh


----------



## mipmunk40 (Nov 13, 2012)

same as me "who am I" in my head all the time. How on earth do it get my "self" back. Been like this for 3 months now, I miss myself so much, I really do, it makes me cry.


----------



## Hosscat (Oct 23, 2012)

Have you been through these thoughts before mipmunk? As in gotten rid of them before?


----------



## mipmunk40 (Nov 13, 2012)

yes I have had DP many times before. This DP was caused by depression however, as opposed to worrying and worrying causing it to trigger off. Am currently being weaned off of Effexor and Remeron and then going onto prozac. Am hoping by treating the underlying depression the DP will go. I just hate feeling so uncomfortable in my own skin. 12 weeks now, and I honestly can't remember how it went last time, the Effexor and Remeron got me better, but having been on them now for 7 years they obviously failed as I got depression, 3 days later the DP kicked in. That was 12 weeks ago. Constant clammy hands and anxiety as I have no sense of self. Just awful. I just exist through each day, I don't live each day anymore. How can I enjoy anything when I have no "sense of self", I am really terrified that I am going to have this now for the rest of my life. And am scared that the prozac and possible lamotrigene that could be added won't bring "me" back. The only time I am happy is when I am asleep to be perfectly honest.


----------



## Fernoso716 (Oct 13, 2012)

Same here. ...smh. as much as I wanna be the old me...im scared theres no return to old self even if dp is gome because the existential questions have brainwashed me


----------



## Guest (Dec 17, 2012)

As you notice them in your mind, imagine them being captured in a little blue bubble that floats out of your head and then pops.


----------

