# The Two Lists Challenge



## SteveCarr (Nov 9, 2014)

Hey everyone, what ive seemed to have gathered recently (even though its so hard for it to sink in, is that DP/DR/Anxiety are all thought based disorders. Thats what i think anyways, they all stem from some sort of thought or way of thinking. Which some of you may already know.

Well, i came across something on the internet called the Two lists Challenge.

It entitles you the participant, to write down*
" What questions do you/have you asked yourself/ What are you thinking/Thought patterns During an episode or Episodes" *and another list of
*" What would you like to believe and focus on to constantly feel the WAY you WANT to feel?".*

I have already completed my list, which i will post now:

*" What questions do you/have you asked yourself/ What are you thinking/Thought patterns During an episode or Episodes"

- my mind feels like its split in two, like i have two subconscious.
- What if im imagining everything i am seeing and experiencing in my supposed "reality"
- What if i am not the "real" me.
- The Family on my fathers side has a few serious mental illnesses (second Cousins to my father), maybe im on the path to getting them as well.
- I am absolutely hopeless/helpless
- What if i think about these thoughts so much that im literally driven nuts.
- If i sit by myself long enough will i start talking to myself and start seeing things and people standing infront of me.*

*- It feels like im living a split life*

*- What if my mind can never break free from this cycle of extremely difficult obsessive thinking?|
- It feels like im gunna drift into another reality constantly.
- What if its possible that i already have descended into madness without knowing?
- It feels like what my mind conjures up appear more and more real as my mind gets weaker and weaker from getting beaten down so much from this disorder.
- What if this Alters me permanently?
- It feels like im losing the ability to distinguish what should be felt and what should ( what reality should be and what it isnt basically)
- What if referring to myself in the third person in my head means im actually talking to someone else INSIDE my own head?*

*" What would you like to believe and focus on to constantly feel the WAY you WANT to feel?"

- I want to go to school *

*- I want to think about the normal cliche life events that everyone else is experiencing.
- I want to rid myself of these absolutely fucking insane thought patterns.*

*- I want money
- I want to feel hopeful NOT hopeless
- I want to see the world clearly like i used to*

*- I want to break free from this nightmare death trap disorder.
- I want to impress my mom and my girlfriend instead of what i feel like now, which is me disappointing them.
- I want my motivation back!
- I want to live my life the way I want to live it.
- I want my feelings back ( Happiness,Excitement,Cheerfulness,Humble,Glad,Content)
- I don't want to feel irritated by everything anymore
- I want to be how i used to be!*

I would love to see what everyone else's lists would look like!
Feel free to post it below, before any of you complete your lists and post them. Stand back and actually re-read them out loud.

Something will click, i promise.


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## Wendy (Aug 7, 2013)

Although I rarely have these thoughts processes anymore (just mild unreality at this point), this is certainly something that would have helped me back when I was covered in these thoughts constantly. It's better to keep track of what you want, rather than the obsessive thoughts you're feeling because the former does a helluva lot more good than the latter.

Great post.


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