# Cant describe this feeling.



## Fluke93 (Nov 2, 2010)

Its drastically gone to severe to very minor, and i still think im getting better. The brain fog comes and goes, but the off feeling i cant describe. I'm getting fears that maybe i dont have DP anymore and i'll never be able to get back as i was. I was laying in bed this morning and i felt small, i cant describe it, like a part of me was there, and a part of me was sort of out. But it feels way less intense, but its really hard to describe. Its like ive come so far from where i was, i feel so damn grateful. It feels like i need to be shocked or something, to get where i was. Sometimes i don't even have brain fog anymore, just the off feeling which i just cant pinpoint. I get no weird thoughts, only dreams. And the other day i was laughing like mad? lol?. Wondering if I'm the only one who has been to this stage?


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## EverDream (Dec 15, 2006)

Fluke said:


> Its drastically gone to severe to very minor, and i still think im getting better. The brain fog comes and goes, but the off feeling i cant describe. I'm getting fears that maybe i dont have DP anymore and i'll never be able to get back as i was. I was laying in bed this morning and i felt small, i cant describe it, like a part of me was there, and a part of me was sort of out. But it feels way less intense, but its really hard to describe. Its like ive come so far from where i was, i feel so damn grateful. It feels like i need to be shocked or something, to get where i was. Sometimes i don't even have brain fog anymore, just the off feeling which i just cant pinpoint. I get no weird thoughts, only dreams. And the other day i was laughing like mad? lol?. Wondering if I'm the only one who has been to this stage?


Maybe it's depression? I know that aside of my DP I also suffer from depression and it makes everything worse.


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## Fluke93 (Nov 2, 2010)

Could be, i do feel pretty low this morning.


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## Visual (Oct 13, 2010)

It is hard to know for sure. But it all sounds like progress to me.

Whether you have a mild brain injury or not, it is good to note that when a person's brain is repairing it isn't usually a smooth even step. You'll get strange things, strong emotions, etc, as the brain works with reconnecting all aspects of perceptions and emotion. Also, people recovering from life-long dissociation can experience such things.

Its progress - relish every moment. Even if what you feel seems strange and different than what you expected.


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## theoneandonly (Nov 17, 2010)

i feel the same. it's like my DR isn't as severe as it used to be, but I still feel like I'm off and will never go back to how I used to be. Especially with the brain fog.


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## Fluke93 (Nov 2, 2010)

Visual Dude said:


> It is hard to know for sure. But it all sounds like progress to me.
> 
> Whether you have a mild brain injury or not, it is good to note that when a person's brain is repairing it isn't usually a smooth even step. You'll get strange things, strong emotions, etc, as the brain works with reconnecting all aspects of perceptions and emotion. Also, people recovering from life-long dissociation can experience such things.
> 
> Its progress - relish every moment. Even if what you feel seems strange and different than what you expected.


Yep, im definitely progressing, or at least progressed, I'm definitely still dped, but its like everything has weakened. Even the feeling of looking at life through a glass, i cant make out if i have that or not. It scared me even more before, because i remember getting depersonalized as a child, for about 10 seconds, and it happened now and then, normally when i walking along the country with my dad. So i thought i was prone to this, and i guess weed kind of triggered it off. But im sure this is not always the case. The thing is im not scared of this shit anymore, im not even scared of going schizophrenic anymore, which before was my biggest fear. Its almnost like i see all of this as irrational. Ive also been able to concentrate a lot more at college, a part from today, i could not function at all because its my third day of no smoking







. Thanks for the post Visual Dude i always find yours helpful







.


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## Fluke93 (Nov 2, 2010)

theoneandonly said:


> i feel the same. it's like my DR isn't as severe as it used to be, but I still feel like I'm off and will never go back to how I used to be. Especially with the brain fog.


 This is probably all our biggest fear, never being the same as we used to. It sucks because its probably keeping a lot of us from making progress. I we have just got to take it as a positive and appreciate we was not as bad as before. And believing no matter what, we will feel normal again even if we kid ourselves if we think positive it will make us feel better. But i have absolutely no doubt i will pull out of this, its got to the point where i dont care if im like this anyway, and since then its been an upwards spiral







.


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