# Sean Madden says he recovered by learning to focus on the present moment.



## seafoamwinterz (Aug 12, 2013)

Along with meditative breathing. Sean Madden is a Youtuber who helps people with DP/DR btw.

I believe him. He says anxiety is triggered mainly by thoughts ahead of time to what you are actually doing.

Let's see my symptoms:

-I'm insanely nostalgic, constantly thinking about the past, and comparing it to today

-I'm always trying to think five (or fifty) steps ahead into the future.

-I'm always daydreaming.

-I'm always planning what I'm gonna say or do next.

-Before I walk into a room I think about where I'm gonna sit.

-Before I go to work I daydream about what my day will be like

The one thing I don't do is... think about what I'm actually doing!!! Before I even got to this board today I started thinking about posting here instead of focusing on what I was doing!

He says as soon as you lose focus on the present moment just bring you're self back. He said it takes practice, and after a couple of months he was cured.

I've taken this advice and have noticed that I'm more relaxed. But I still daydream so I'm working on it.


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## Haumea (Jul 11, 2009)

That's excellent advice, but I would add a few things to that:

1) *Create goals* to focus on in the present. If you have worthy goals, being present will be easier - you can focus on activities which bring you closer to reaching them. If you have nothing on your plate, you can easily lapse into past/future thinking.

2) *Know your blind spots* - e.g. if you are dreamy, e.g. you may have dependency patterns that you need to break. Stop relying on other people if it's affecting your self-esteem, e.g.

3) Understand what you feel inadequate about and steadily work to improve. This relates to (1) as those goals should be bringing you towards a state of full mental health.


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## heartless (Apr 29, 2013)

His early videos kept me away from suicide five months ago... I feel very very stupid for not following his advise earlier. I do some meditation on regular basis and it lessens whats left of my symptoms. I guess I didn't believe that such a simple thing can have such a huge positive impact.


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## seafoamwinterz (Aug 12, 2013)

ThoughtOnFire said:


> You didn't You didn't plan that one out very well did you?


I guess I guess not lol


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## sunshinita (Aug 13, 2013)

seafoamwinterz said:


> Along with meditative breathing. Sean Madden is a Youtuber who helps people with DP/DR btw.
> 
> I believe him. He says anxiety is triggered mainly by thoughts ahead of time to what you are actually doing.
> 
> ...


That's pretty much me when I don't have dp hah..I am always dreaming of thu future or I get nostalgic about the past.That is me before dp


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## chelsy010 (Oct 29, 2012)

This is such good advice.whenever I give my focus to whatever I'm doing at that moment, my dr becomes less and less.I just need to practice it more till it becomes more natural.


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## googleeyes (Apr 25, 2012)

This is a lot of what Eckhart Tolle talks about. I don't understand the immense hate toward this guy on this site.


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## NEEDMOREBLAZE (Apr 8, 2013)

I think the type of mind that Sean references is a blessing, but when not taken care of properly and given the appropriate rest it becomes exhausted, broken, and out of whack on a chemical level. It is a mental strength to have such a detailed oriented mind, but when the thoughts it creates are geared towards stress and fear on a constant basis this leads us into DP and then we attach ourselves to the experience of DP. It then becomes habitual and natural for us to constantly compare our current state of mind to those of the past and forecasting the results into the future...it's like a record player that never seems to stop. The only natural remedy is to calm down the fear and learn that we are the ones responsible for the thoughts we are creating.

The two times i was cured during my teenage years there was always something that distracted me from the thoughts of DP and i eventually moved on and re-connected with myself. What I did not cure myself of was the toxic reactions i had to stress and traumatic events from the past. I held onto trauma, trying my hardest to correct things in a never-ending quest for perfection and safety. The months leading up to my DP, i felt mentally worn out, emotionless, very little motivation to achieve things i desired, everything became difficult. I could not enjoy the weekend for thinking about going back to work, i could not sleep well for the thought of having to wake up or nightmares. I could not have a serious relationship because I was worried about how my life would change or i'm not good enough in some area so why bother. Just a toxic cycle of negative and stressful thinking....no wonder the walls came crashing down out of nowhere one night.

Meditation was the first thing that helped me alleviate alot of my symptoms from DP....whether it be focusing on the breath or just listening to the sounds of nature without thought helped me alot. I have also found that reading and engaging in organized thought by focusing on goals is a great practice to integrate the brain on a regular basis.


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## Guest (Sep 16, 2013)

Susto said:


> People hate tolle because they are ignorant, take sean madden advice to the core he followed eckhart teachings and is recovered


I don't like Tolle because he takes a beneficial and normally easy to comprehend idea and draws it out to such an extreme that it becomes a distorted riddle which alienates the people his ideas could be helping.


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

Susto said:


> People hate tolle because they are ignorant, take sean madden advice to the core he followed eckhart teachings and is recovered


In fact,that's not because of that.And yes because Tolle says so many bullshit about spiritualism,enlightment,and other shit that no one cares.

If one believes DP/DR is enlighment,one shall die with it.

And well I've been 1 year free without panic attacks,just by letting them go,tried the same with DR/DP with no sucess.

I think it'll depend of the person.


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## googleeyes (Apr 25, 2012)

Victor Ouriques said:


> In fact,that's not because of that.And yes because Tolle says so many bullshit about spiritualism,enlightment,and other shit that no one cares.
> 
> If one believes DP/DR is enlighment,one shall die with it.
> 
> ...


Tolle never claimed that DP was enlightenment. He simply wanted to bring to light that the ego and racing mind is not all that we are. He tried to make a point that we are so much bigger and deeper than are daily lives. I understand how someone with dp could read his work and assume he has depersonalized, but I don't think this is the case. He simply put his life in perspective.

Regardless of what he says about spirituality, his emphasis on living in the present moment is really important and should not be lost on us.


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

I get the idea of 'living in the present', but I think it's a fundamentally flawed philosophy in every day life, unless your are a monk living in the upper reaches of an Asian forest. Who doesn't want to think about the future, look forward to their goals, what they want to achieve, day dream about being successful. I mean, if someone asks Tolle what his plans are on the weekend, does he not know? I'm not trying to be an arrogant ass, but I think future projections are vital to what inspires and drives us? What is the point of anything if not projected against our experiences of the past and our visions of the future? Our whole being is justified and meaningful by our memories and ambitions. I just don't get it


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## googleeyes (Apr 25, 2012)

yosemitedome said:


> I get the idea of 'living in the present', but I think it's a fundamentally flawed philosophy in every day life, unless your are a monk living in the upper reaches of an Asian forest. Who doesn't want to think about the future, look forward to their goals, what they want to achieve, day dream about being successful. I mean, if someone asks Tolle what his plans are on the weekend, does he not know? I'm not trying to be an arrogant ass, but I think future projections are vital to what inspires and drives us? What is the point of anything if not projected against our experiences of the past and our visions of the future? Our whole being is justified and meaningful by our memories and ambitions. I just don't get it


This isn't what he is trying to say. He isn't saying "don't make plans, don't learn from your past." He says, accept your past but don't live in it. Don't view your present and future through the lens of your past. Just because you failed yesterday shouldn't deter you from trying today

As for the future... He says: Set goals, makes plans, have goals and aspirations and work toward them. But don't constantly live in some projected future dream land. While doing some menial task like washing your car, focus on washing your car, not on some event from your past or something you want to do in the future. Life only takes place in the present and if you are constantly thinking of the past or future you might miss it.

He is trying to tackle the idea of always thinking to the future and never being satisfied with the present. If you day dream of being successful, then once you becomes successful you will day dream of something else. It's a habit formed. The ever unattainable happiness. Appreciate where you are at now.

I have so many friends just like this: "hey man let's go shopping, sitting here sucks. Dude shopping is a waste of time, I wish I was at a party. We should leave this party, I'd love to go home and play video games." They are never content anywhere, they are always dreaming of this better future.

Go, go, go with no destination.

Just my take on it.


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

Cheah,

I'd give anything to be able to just sit in a shopping mall without thinking rediculous shit, and feeling disconnected. I think I would sit there for hours if I ever recovered, what a luxury that would be, I would feel like a King.


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

And I like your interpretation of his teachings.


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## googleeyes (Apr 25, 2012)

yosemitedome said:


> Cheah,
> 
> I'd give anything to be able to just sit in a shopping mall without thinking rediculous shit, and feeling disconnected. I think I would sit there for hours if I ever recovered, what a luxury that would be, I would feel like a King.


If you are able to be completely present, this is possible. I strongly encourage practicing meditation.



yosemitedome said:


> And I like your interpretation of his teachings.


My parents are both very into yoga, mediation, and healthy living. My dad has probably purchased every single thing Tolle has ever produced. Being able to read everything he's written has given me a different perspective on him.


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## yosemitedome (Aug 1, 2013)

You're right man, I went surfing a few times when I was back in my home town on tour with my band. I felt so present and connected, it was amazing.


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## Echoe (Sep 16, 2013)

Dude I miss my past even though I had DP those days, but I actually can't focus to the present, only past and future. How do you actually focus to the present? I don't know how to do it.


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## googleeyes (Apr 25, 2012)

Echoe said:


> Dude I miss my past even though I had DP those days, but I actually can't focus to the present, only past and future. How do you actually focus to the present? I don't know how to do it.


You can't just focus on the "present" that's too abstract. It's more like, if you are sitting on a bench in a park, don't think about how you feel and how that may affect you're future. Instead, focus on the birds chirping around, the people walking around, the feeling of the bench underneath you. If you are shaving your face, focus on the razor running over your skin, and the humidity in the room. You need to be observant and present in the moment, reign in your mind and just focus on the NOW 

It's one of those things that gets easier over time.


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## NEEDMOREBLAZE (Apr 8, 2013)

googleeyes said:


> You can't just focus on the "present" that's too abstract. It's more like, if you are sitting on a bench in a park, don't think about how you feel and how that may affect you're future. Instead, focus on the birds chirping around, the people walking around, the feeling of the bench underneath you. If you are shaving your face, focus on the razor running over your skin, and the humidity in the room. You need to be observant and present in the moment, reign in your mind and just focus on the NOW
> 
> It's one of those things that gets easier over time.


This has helped with my anxiety that occurs in the middle of the night, i have started focusing on the sound of the fan in my room and the anxiety ceases, my breathing returns to normal, and i fall back asleep. The insomnia and nightmares have also ceased to exist from this practice of mindlessness and simple focus on the external environment.


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## Midnight (Jul 16, 2011)

Echoe said:


> Dude I miss my past even though I had DP those days, but I actually can't focus to the present, only past and future. How do you actually focus to the present? I don't know how to do it.


It's so hard with DP/DR, I really struggle sometimes, but essentially the best way is to begin by focusing on externals. I.e. sounds you can hear, sensations you can feel, things you can see, but don't go into the mind with it. Don't let the mind chatter about what you are seeing, hearing, smelling, whatever it is.


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## kayseas95 (Feb 25, 2013)

seafoamwinterz said:


> Along with meditative breathing. Sean Madden is a Youtuber who helps people with DP/DR btw.
> 
> I believe him. He says anxiety is triggered mainly by thoughts ahead of time to what you are actually doing.
> 
> ...


It's pretty much almost instant man, and holy fuck do I ever relate to some of the stuff you said but whenever I feel myself kinda slipping back into that way of thought I just focus on the present moment and it drops quick when I keep my focus on it


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## kayseas95 (Feb 25, 2013)

Victor Ouriques said:


> In fact,that's not because of that.And yes because Tolle says so many bullshit about spiritualism,enlightment,and other shit that no one cares.
> 
> If one believes DP/DR is enlighment,one shall die with it.
> 
> ...


the fucks wrong with u?


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

kayseas95 said:


> the fucks wrong with u?


Well I'm atheist,thous I don't believe in spiritual bullshit,gayness from God,or anything similar.


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## seafoamwaves (Sep 20, 2013)

Victor Ouriques said:


> Well I'm atheist,thous I don't believe in spiritual bullshit,gayness from God,or anything similar.


Cool, I'm glad I came to this forum or I would've never known this about you.


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## googleeyes (Apr 25, 2012)

Victor Ouriques said:


> Well I'm atheist,thous I don't believe in spiritual bullshit,gayness from God,or anything similar.


Better discount any advice someone gives because of the above.


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