# Scary Thoughts



## Bonanza91 (Jun 30, 2011)

Does anyone else have disturbing odd thoughts as well as DP/ DR? If so could you be specific and list them here? I don't want to get too personal but I never had thoughts like these until this and I just want to know that other people feel the same way...?








i hate this.


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## Jayden (Feb 9, 2011)

since I have a bad fear of schizophrenia I often through out the day have "delusional" like thoughts. For example, people being against me, or spying on me and crap like that. I don't believe in them but they cause a HUGE amount of distress


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## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

Bonanza91 said:


> Does anyone else have disturbing odd thoughts as well as DP/ DR? If so could you be specific and list them here? I don't want to get too personal but I never had thoughts like these until this and I just want to know that other people feel the same way...?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Yeah, I have had this. If you don't believe them, like there is a possibility that you don't think they are true, then it is related to being anxious. Think of it, if one feels like they are floating outside of this current reality, and everything feels strange as it does with dp, then for sure a lot of strange thoughts will come into one's head.

I realized that the thoughts that you describe (and I have had similar ones), keep us anxious, and then it is the massive anxiety that keeps us feeling like we are outside of our bodies, or that life is strange.

You are going to be okay!! Do what you can to break the cycle of anxiety. For me, it has varied from using lavender oil, or taking something to relax me.

I have so been there, and trust me..I am okay. I know I am not psychotic.


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## Ash Hayden (Apr 10, 2011)

I get weird thoughts all the time. I don't know where they come from but I've stopped telling anyone about them because they just give me looks.


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

Completely normal.

I had some like:

Like What if i'm not real?What if the world is a lie?What if the people here,my friends,parents,are illusions of my head?What if the world doesn't even exist?

They're pretty fucking bad.

And some of them really triggered me DP/DR and even PANICK ATTACKS.

But now I'm getting read of these thoughts.

My DR/DP is gone,but these thoughts aren't yet.80% Are gone,20% I already had before DP/DR,Panick,Anxiety,I believe them can be an underline-cause of mine Panick Disorder(the main reason why I got DP/DR)


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## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

Victor Ouriques said:


> Completely normal.
> 
> I had some like:
> 
> ...


I can totally relate to these thoughts. I, too have thought what if the world is a lie. What if this is in my head. Then, it triggered massive anxiety because I then wondered what this all is.

It is all anxiety and DP talking.

I even had thoughts like: what if everyone is in on something. I worried myself like crazy. It is all anxiety which causes the DP, which causes the scary thoughts, which creates more anxiety. It sucks.


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## Victor Ouriques (Jul 15, 2011)

2deepathinker said:


> I can totally relate to these thoughts. I, too have thought what if the world is a lie. What if this is in my head. Then, it triggered massive anxiety because I then wondered what this all is.
> 
> It is all anxiety and DP talking.
> 
> I even had thoughts like: what if everyone is in on something. I worried myself like crazy. It is all anxiety which causes the DP, which causes the scary thoughts, which creates more anxiety. It sucks.


Yeah it sucks a lot.It's pretty hard to break the vicious cycle.

I had another thing that proved me that it's all anxiety related.

The benzodiazepines,especially the Clonazepam 0,5mg.I'm still using it,but I realized soon that if I used it my DR/DP simply fade away.It kills my anxiety to zero,also killing my DR/DP.

I'm taking Lexapro 10mg,which killed my other symptons of Anxiety(Fast heart beatings,sweating,shaking hard,etc).But lexapro as an antidepressive,acts slowy.25 July will make 1 month of it.At the beggining it fucked me up,just got worse,but then helped me so much.

Probably on 2nd August I'll start my the withdraw of Clonazepam.Which is my next encounter to my Psychiatrist.He'll probably start doing the withdraw.


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## Nico111 (Apr 8, 2011)

Hi all!

I'm french so sorry for my english.
Me too i have scary thoughts..the worse of them is my fear to hear voice.
I'm so scared that i can feel strange to think...like if my own voice (in my head) became strange.
I'm afraid to not recognized my own voice in my head and tell to myself bad words...it's the hell
How can i rassure myself if i feel strange when i think...
I have to break this circle and maybe try yoga or something cause i'm afraid to develop a "real" disorder.
Incredible circle..
I can't talk about that with someone, he's going to think i'm psychotic..

i throw up this fear and dp!


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## 2deepathinker (Aug 17, 2009)

Nico111 said:


> Hi all!
> 
> I'm french so sorry for my english.
> Me too i have scary thoughts..the worse of them is my fear to hear voice.
> ...


I would say the best thing is to distract yourself, and really get yourself involved with life no matter how scared you feel. It will really help. It won't be easy at first.

I also have had thoughts like how weird it is to think, and have thought. Find the things you love the most, and do them. This is caused by the DP.


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## Guest (Jul 20, 2011)

Bonanza91 said:


> Does anyone else have disturbing odd thoughts as well as DP/ DR? If so could you be specific and list them here? I don't want to get too personal but I never had thoughts like these until this and I just want to know that other people feel the same way...?
> 
> 
> 
> ...


yes, I think almost everybody with DP/anxiety/panic experience or experienced it. so you're not alone at all.

too personal? this forum is superpersonal by essence.

my list :
thoughs about fear of death
superdepressing thoughs about the shortness of life, how nothing lasts (be it the forma 1 season or your family member)
fear of going crazy
fear of gone crazy
fear that I reached some enlightened state and I realized the illusion of everything, and fear that it can't be undone
fear that all my life is a lie, and my identity is fake
fear that I ate or drank something that messed up my brain
fear that by thinking these thoughts I messed myself up (see whatsup here?







"okay I'm not crazy of any of that, but then why I think about this? I must be crazy" --> cycle starts again)

what you should understand that the problem is not what any of these thoughts are about (life, being crazy, death, etc.). there's an underlying emotional crisis, or some kind of "releasing" process that needs to be done, and the thoughts are just your failed search for the root of your problem.

you know, when the car won't start doesn't matter what the mechanic does, he starts to think about every possibility that MAY cause the problem (the car is coming from a wrong series and it's a wreck since it came out of the factory, the engine got burned totally, caused by wrong fuel, etc.) , but when he realizes that it's nothing more than a burned fuse, the car goes on and there's no more question about what was the problem.


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## Jayden (Feb 9, 2011)

Lowrey said:


> yes, I think almost everybody with DP/anxiety/panic experience or experienced it. so you're not alone at all.
> 
> too personal? this forum is superpersonal by essence.
> 
> ...


I think this is definitely right. Wish I could stop having my delusional-like SZ thoughts... it's absolutely wearing me down.


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## Nico111 (Apr 8, 2011)

Thanks "2deep"!!

It helps me to know some people can understand me and have known the same thing.
Sometimes i think i'm the only one who have this kind of thoughts..how can i go sooo far in my fear and have doubt about all???

For sure, keeping my mind busy is the best reply i can give to my fears!


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

Lowery just wondering if u have overcome ur existential questions since u were last on here ? I too am hAving them bad and it's making me panic . If there's any advice at all that u have please let me know . It's horrible


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## meganhall45 (Jan 5, 2012)

im glad im not the only one. my thoughts never seem to stop. it is very wearing. and to not be able to tell anyone how im really feeling on the inside makes me feel even more detatched. I pretend to be cool calm and collected like I dont give a shit but on the inside im like fuck am i going crazy? why dont I feel real? Why dont you seam real? nothing seams real. Trying to find who I am and how i belong in this world. Even my family doesnt seam real anymore. fuck. If I make it out of this and somehow feel "normal" someday I will be amazed. I think I have a lot of fucking emotional issues I need to deal with but I feel nothing!


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

megan i went thru a long stage of feeling nothing.. but therepy forced me to feel.. all the things i didnt wanna feel yano. i remember wishing i cud feel love and sadness again.. now i dont want it.. its too painful ha... but the dp is covering all that up... now that im feeling all the suppressed feelings i had im having anxiety and strong existential thoughts because im in defense mode in my head because its too much to bare..


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## Guest (Jan 28, 2012)

Not to be too specific, but I have had a lot of weird thoughts. I know they are bullshit though so I can control it.


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## dnelson2727 (Jan 17, 2012)

Holy cow, i'm glad i saw this. this basically describes the way i've been feeling of late. Any tips on ditching these crazy thoughts??


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

let the thoughts run thru u... they are part of ur anxious mind... doesnt mean they are true.. watch them and dont react.. eventually the thoughts will lose their hold on u


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

let the thoughts run thru u... they are part of ur anxious mind... doesnt mean they are true.. watch them and dont react.. eventually the thoughts will lose their hold on u


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## mkeshish (Nov 26, 2011)

wow this is one of the most useful posts I have read...

the DP is bad enough but the thoughts (and in my case obsessive thoughts) are the absolute worst part of it...

questioning reality is my biggest one, and what if none of this is real... it got so bad that i have almost feel confused about what it is to be human, does that make any sense? my thoughts and physical body are so far apart from each other and it feels awful.

i even get weird thoughts like how do i know my memories are real, or what if i'm not understanding things correctly. the thoughts don't even really make sense but they swim thru my head!

i am on meds, anti-depressants and klonopin, and this has greatly reduced the anxiety attached to my DP and obsessive thoughts but they are still there.


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

i am the same hun.. on meds but still terrified of these thought.. i jsut wanna feel normal in the world again... my thoughts are crazy.. i bet ive had every single one any one of u have had.. im almost afraid to be alive because i feel like its too unbelievable an i feel like i need a reason to live like a purpose because it all feels like a horrible scarey game at the moment.. i have to act my way thru the day pretending i know wat it is to be human. i analyze life so much that i cant live it anymore.. it makes me so depressed an i feel truly like it wil never be the same.. although i pray that im wrong.


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## katiej (Jan 21, 2012)

i am the same hun.. on meds but still terrified of these thought.. i jsut wanna feel normal in the world again... my thoughts are crazy.. i bet ive had every single one any one of u have had.. im almost afraid to be alive because i feel like its too unbelievable an i feel like i need a reason to live like a purpose because it all feels like a horrible scarey game at the moment.. i have to act my way thru the day pretending i know wat it is to be human. i analyze life so much that i cant live it anymore.. it makes me so depressed an i feel truly like it wil never be the same.. although i pray that im wrong.


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## mkeshish (Nov 26, 2011)

Katie, thanks so much for responding...it sucks when you feel like no one else can understand or know how you feel. Would you mind if i pm you or exchange emails? It would be great having someone to talk to while going thru this.

And if this provides any hope, about 2 years ago I did go through this, maybe not to the exact degree and with some slight differences, but i was in a hospital program and thought my life was over. i was scared of the world. For almost a year and a half i was fine, and then i changed meds and went thru some stress and unfortunately here i am again... but i had a major break where i felt "normal" again. it takes time, but i'm hoping it will happen again soon, for all of us


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## sheldon780 (Apr 17, 2013)

The thoughts are the only thing holding me back, I had a rough morning but around 3pm I felt the urge to play some drums, I still felt uneasy about it and had thoughts like (I dont want to play, if I let go of the feeling that everything in life is pointless I might lose myself (as silly as that sounds)) or (Is this really what life is aboit, just chasing possitive feelings, is that why people still go on and live? Do these feelings really mean anything???) but I played anyways and after about 15 minutes I just let myself go and I felt more in control and alive. It felt...good I guess and more normal, suddenly I felt my connection with the earth and.world comming back and I just rolled with it, very very close to recovery and like no panic and anxiety feelings. If we can change.the auto pilot thoughts then we have control back, I think a lot of DP DR is a fear of not being in control of our lives and selves. Good luck everybody!!!!


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