# DP for the second time...



## Guest (Dec 23, 2005)

This is alittle lengthy. Any opinion or suggestion would be appreciated.

My story begins back when I was 16, I had my first DP episode. For whatever reason, I believe my DP was sparked by a hormonal imbalance. Prior to my episode, I was receiving testorone shots for 'lack of growth' noted by my peditrician. I would go every couple weeks and receive testostorone shots. I then began a low dosage of tomoxifen for noticible breast development. Both the shots and the tomoxifen helped by battle. (I am now 6ft)

However, after coming off these meds, I expereinced a brief episode of DP. I do not remember whether it was because of these chemicals racing through my body (i remember intense episodes of my legs going numb and not being able to feel my face.) or because of feeling paniced by what the doctors where doing to me. Whatever it was, it sparked a DP episode that lasted a good 3 months. I was scared, lonely and didn't tell anyone. For some reason my DP cleared up completely...

Fast forward to 3 weeks ago. I'm 22, have a good paying job, a new car, a supportive girlfriend and really understanding parents. I have a four year college degree. Everything was great.. I felt amazing... but..

3 weeks ago... I went to the doctor for some ear pain. My doctor supposely thought it was a infection. He prescribed some Septra-DS twice daily.

I started taking these meds and I had a severe reaction to them. Nothing life threating.. but extreme changes to my body I never expereinced before. This included constant urination, burning in my legs, feeling of restlessness.. lack of appiette.. naseua.

A couple of days after I went off the Septra (only taking 3 of the 10 days prescribed).. something was amiss. The DP feelings came creeping back. My first new episode started a week and a half ago with my girlfriend. I began to panic cause I knew the dreadful feeling of DP.

I went back to the doctor and thought that I had prosatitis.. so he prescribed me some doxycycline. What a mistake.

Fast forward to last weekend. I was with my family and we went out to a resturant. My DP was intense and I began to panic. Later on that night.. it was soo bad I expereinced my first anxiety attack. It was an intesne feeling of being out of control.. I was dying I told myself. My parents freaked and my mother and father grabbed and shaked me but I couldnt respond. The DP was so unreal I was looking at my mothers face but saw nothing.... but I remembered it all.

That night I began having sleeping problems. Right before I would fall asleep I would be zapped with panic. I don't know why. Sleeping this past week has been incredibily difficult.

I saw another MD a couple of days ago. I explained everything to him. He probably thought I was insane... however he prescribed seroquil and effexor for me. I have'nt taken the meds yet as I am truly afraid of any kind of anti-pyschotic or anti-depressent drug. I was flying high just two weeks ago.. what happened to me?

In honesty, I believe my DP is caused by anxiety, and the feeling of the unknown. Sparked by the Septra.. and sparked by my hormone shots. The DP was sparked by my foolishness... 'Septra caused me great damage'.

I don't want to take any meds yet.. as I know I pulled through in high school. However... there are greater things at stake. My job... my girl... my life.

How effective would it be to see a theripst? Could this be a chemical imbalance from the antibotics i took? Or am I stuck in the cycle of panic, anxiety and DP?


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## HopeFloats (Dec 22, 2005)

Hi..our stories sound very similar (I posted it just recently) and I can totally relate..I'm 22 and had (still have hopefully) EVERYTHING going for me and 3 months ago..smacked with this crap.

What helped me a lot is just reading through the advice on this site in the main discussion forum and in regaining reality forum and freudian theories forum, etc and actually finding all posts and reading all posts by Janine Baker (just click on her name and select find all posts by her..if you go to depersonalization stories shes the author of the first post) She went through this for many years and recovered and she offered a lot of great advice. Her book is an EXCELLENT must read (Unraveling by Janine Baker and you can get it online)

I'm not sure if it's a chemical imbalance..you mentioned you believed its caused by anxiety, fear of the unknown..and I believe many of the people here have that, esp. fear of the unknown, death. so I think thats worth exploring in therapy.

My best advice to you is to stay active, do things no matter how horrible you feel, try your best not to panic/worry about it because it just makes it worse & seek out therapy. I have started seeing a psychoanalyst psychotherapist and we're trying to tackle this thing.

Good luck to you and I'm always here to talk! We all need eachother in times like this.
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