# heeelp



## sapphire2011 (Sep 8, 2007)

I've been experiencing depersonalization symptoms for the past 3 days, without ceasing. I thought I was going nuts and was so scared that I finally went to the ER to see if maybe I had a brain tumor or something else majorly wrong.. but physically I'm 100% fine, so they let me go.

It's the weekend, so I can't even call around to get an appointment with a psychiatrist until Monday, and even then it usually takes weeks to get in to see somebody as a new patient.

I have no history of any mental illness, aside from my ADHD. I've tried days both with and without my Adderall, and it doesn't affect my depersonalization symptoms.

Basically, i just need to find ways to deal with this until i can get a professional involved.. because the more this thing stresses me out, the more I'm worried that I'm going to do something nuts just to prove I'm real.... and nobody I talk to at work seems to realize how intense what i'm feeling is, and I have no friends IRL that i can talk to, and no family.. so it's pretty much up to me to take care of me until i can get a professional on it...


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## Capt-Hook (Aug 22, 2007)

The more you worry or think about depersonalization, the worse depersonalization will get. If you can't stop thinking about it, try and keep your mind busy with something else. Maybe a video game, movie, exercise. Just don't give depersonalization a second thought. I know, the first few days I had it, I was practically bed ridden. It's really hard at first, but there's not much you or a professional can do about it, really. They may give you some meds to coop, but there's no real cure. But, the best way to deal with it is not to think about it, pretend it's not happening.


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## PPPP (Nov 26, 2006)

Hi sapphire 

Capt is right that worrying about it and thinking about it all the time is very unhelpful.
You don't have to pretend it's not happening (no offense capt)
That can be hard to do. 
you don't have to pretend that everything is ok.
But just go with it instead of putting all your energy into being upset about it. 
Stressing out about it will make it worse.
Don't let yourself get too stressed out and try to get enough sleep.

If there's something that you find soothing you should do that as much as possible. 
For example, I find it really soothing to have a cup of tea so I guzzle tea all day.


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## TerriW (Jun 13, 2007)

I undestand, it is very scary. The other posts give good advice, try not to let it consume you, try not to be afraid of it, it will only make it worse. I know this is easier said than done , but try to relax and you will be okay, you are not going crazy. Tell yourself that it will be okay and you will start to believe it. I hope you have peaceful days again very very soon. (((((HUGS)))))


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## sapphire2011 (Sep 8, 2007)

Capt-Hook said:


> The more you worry or think about depersonalization, the worse depersonalization will get. If you can't stop thinking about it, try and keep your mind busy with something else. Maybe a video game, movie, exercise. Just don't give depersonalization a second thought. I know, the first few days I had it, I was practically bed ridden. It's really hard at first, but there's not much you or a professional can do about it, really. They may give you some meds to coop, but there's no real cure. But, the best way to deal with it is not to think about it, pretend it's not happening.


Yeah, I've been playing a lot of World of Warcraft. I can't do stuff with other people because my social interaction is pretty much nil, and I have horrid reaction times.. but mindless killing of monsters is somehow calming, almost cathartic. At work though, there's not much I can do. I try to do deep breaths or read a book or something, but when a call beeps in it kind of jars me -- I'm actually afraid of the call for a second or two, which of course is irrational, but then I do my job.. even though I keep forgetting basic processes that I do at least 10-20 times a day usually, and have to keep asking superiors how to do stuff I thought was already automated.

To everybody else.. thanks a lot for the kind words. I at least feel better knowing I'm not physically ill, but when, for example, my entire head starts tingling (pins and niddles, like when your arm falls asleep), it's quite disconcerting. Also, of course.. having people respond is sort of like confirmation that I actually /do/ exist, if that makes any sense at all ... a lot of times I'll say something to somebody, and they won't respond, and then I'll wonder if i said anything at all, or maybe they can't hear me because i'm not really here..

anyway though .. kind of rambling now.. i wish i could convince work that i needed a few days off to try to pull myself together, but as there's no outward signs (other than crappy work performance), i don't see that happening.

as for calming.. the two best things seem to be sleeping (i feel most normal just before i fall asleep), and cuddling a giant carebear, as if i was a 5 year old child or something.. lol. luckily i collect carebears so i have tons of them at home.. not so sure about being almost 30 and bringing a stuffed animal into work to cuddle with though, lol.


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## ohelp (May 22, 2007)

i know exactly how you feel right now. when my dr first set in i had to wait 2 months to see a psychiatrist about it, oh my god that was pure hell. you feel like you're going crazy any second and NO ONE understands what you're going through because you still act perfectly normal on the outside. i had no idea what was going on with me back then, so good thing you found this forum. anyway, my advice is try not to constantly think about it / analyze how you're feeling because that only makes things worse. distract yourself, redecorate your apartment, and most importantly stay physically healthy, exercise helps a lot when you feel out of body.  it gets easier with time, even if dp/dr stays for a while.


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## ohelp (May 22, 2007)

double post, sorry.


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