# DP is more traumatic then any trauma I have endured.



## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

That is the truth. This DP crap is not protecting me bc I now want to die. I have never thought more about taking my own life. I cannot live like this. It's a joke. I am so sorry to all of you who have this. I am sorry but i would rather be on my death bed and have myself then to go through another day of DP.


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## mind.divided (Jul 2, 2015)

Watch this, it may help you


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## marduk (Mar 4, 2015)

Hey, i have been were you are many times and i know that i really cannot say anything to make it stop other that the state of mind you are in wont last forever. I have had dpdr for almost two years and for the most part i was borderline bedridden with no motivation to do anything and felt completly hopeless and depressed, i cried almost every day because it felt like such an impossible fight and i actually envied people with terminal illnesses like cancer because even in their suffering they could experience their surroundings for better or worse and actually feel like they partake in their life, this condition is so cruel and bizarre and nobody deserves to go through the kind of shit people like us experience everyday and nobody understands it and just tells you to ''cheer up'', but it gets better. Nowadays i am almost completely recovered and am able to participate in life and my symptom intensity has lowered dramatically and i dont feel like total crap all the time, it's a slow and quite crappy process but slowly the symptoms start to fade, you notice that every week you feel slightly less crappy and weird, you shouldn't feel hopeless because you are not. Just hang in there


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## Surfingisfun001 (Sep 25, 2007)

"DP is more traumatic than any trauma I have endured."

I have thought this as well myself many a time.


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## shattered memories (Jul 19, 2012)

marduk said:


> Hey, i have been were you are many times and i know that i really cannot say anything to make it stop other that the state of mind you are in wont last forever. I have had dpdr for almost two years and for the most part i was borderline bedridden with no motivation to do anything and felt completly hopeless and depressed, i cried almost every day because it felt like such an impossible fight and i actually envied people with terminal illnesses like cancer because even in their suffering they could experience their surroundings for better or worse and actually feel like they partake in their life, this condition is so cruel and bizarre and nobody deserves to go through the kind of shit people like us experience everyday and nobody understands it and just tells you to ''cheer up'', but it gets better. Nowadays i am almost completely recovered and am able to participate in life and my symptom intensity has lowered dramatically and i dont feel like total crap all the time, it's a slow and quite crappy process but slowly the symptoms start to fade, you notice that every week you feel slightly less crappy and weird, you shouldn't feel hopeless because you are not. Just hang in there


I could've written this myself. I honestly would've given up both my legs to be normal again. It definitely is NOT hopeless.

In my darkest days, I never thought Id make it out alive. I refused to believe the people here who told me things will get better...but they did, slowly but surely. Im not 100% recovered even after four years but its dramatically better. And it'll get better for you too, trust me.


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## Aly (Jun 13, 2016)

I 100% know what you mean..wish I could help you.. if if you ever need to talk, don't hesitate to PM me..


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## Carl_34_m_UK (May 3, 2016)

It's so upseting how these (DP\DR) conditions give people suicidal thoughts. I had never in 35 years had thoughts of this nature and alwys lived life as it is just too short. If someone would have told me that one day you will consider taking your own life then I would have not have believed them.

I wonder how many of the daily suicides in the world are people suffering from this? I could never bring myself to do it and hope that never changes but I have had thoughts of neding things as to live with it is just living hell.

How any condition can make us feel this way is just not right


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## Alex617 (Sep 23, 2015)

You will find that many here feel exactly the same way as you do. It's truly a hellish state to be in.

We default to suicidal thinking and doing when we no longer have the resources to battle extreme pain and despair.

I suggest doing the following to avoid this trap:

1. Tell everyone who loves you about how you are currently feeling, even if they can't understand, it's important that people are in the know. People in our state feel very isolated, and isolation is the key factor in poor mental health. You might not feel it now, but once you get better you will see how much it benefits you to have social support.

2. Get in touch with a doctor and a therapist. A therapist may not understand dp/dr, but they should be able to empathize with your depressed mental state. If you talk to them and find they don't understand you, don't immediately discount their advice.

3. Take care of the basics, try to eat healthy, force yourself to do things such as exercise and meeting your friends, even if you don't feel like it. It will pay off later.

Remember that you can get through this, many have beat dp/dr, I was suicidal for an entire year because I thought I couldn't handle another day feeling this way. However today I am 100% recovered, so trust me when I say you can get better. If you need more advice you can send me a PM, I don't come on often but I always reply.


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## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

Thank you all for the love and support. While I never would do anything to myself or rather my body at this point, I have entertained thoughts of being better off dead. I am so sorry you are all living through this. I pray for hope for all of us. When dreams feel more real then being awake does, sleep seens like an escape but sleep doesn't even come.

Love is stronger then fear. And in my opinion God is bigger then all of this. Somewhere out there, my spirit and soul are safe.


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## RichUK (Oct 6, 2011)

Hang in there, you will get over this 100%. Alot of people with DR feel like this, but I dont think they want to die just want it to stop.

The mind can lock you up like a prison but it cant do it for ever, eventually what you are thinkig and feeling will not bother you as much.

If you were scared of spiders and I but one infront of you everyday for a month eventually it would have no effect on you and this is the same with DR and the thoughts it generates. I know how horrible it is for you at the moment as been there myself but you can and will get over this.

Rich


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## CoffeeGirl9 (Oct 4, 2009)

mind.divided said:


> Watch this, it may help you


I mean this is great but all those ppl look way more conscious then I am. I am telling you i feel dead. I can't even feel hopelessness because I feel so dead. I have tried distraction but there is no one to distract. I am not there. Like at all. And please don't comment on well then how are you writing this. I don't have the answer for that. Just please know I am in great distress. And funny thing is if you were to see me at this moment I look like the most calm human being. Only bc I am not there. I can't even hold my body up. And when I stand it's like there is no body at all.

I know many of you feel the same. So please excuse my pity party. I am at a complete loss as to what to do.


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## Pondererer (May 18, 2016)

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> Just please know I am in great distress. And funny thing is if you were to see me at this moment I look like the most calm human being.


Oh my god that brings back bad DP memories. So often have i had that desperate scream in my head, feeling totally lost, dead, existensial terror. Yet on the outside i would look very calm and at ease i guess, which makes it that much worse that no one can see the suffering i'm going through


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## EmmaBo (Aug 31, 2016)

CoffeeGirl9 said:


> Love is stronger then fear.


These words of yours are true, coffee girl. Hold on this truth. And RichUK is right. You can and you will get through this.


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## brandonbrandon (Oct 14, 2016)

Pondererer said:


> Oh my god that brings back bad DP memories. So often have i had that desperate scream in my head, feeling totally lost, dead, existensial terror. Yet on the outside i would look very calm and at ease i guess, which makes it that much worse that no one can see the suffering i'm going through


that is the same way i am


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## RichUK (Oct 6, 2011)

There is no magic pill or magic word that I can say to stop it. The only thing that worked for me was to carry on as normal. It was hell to start with but the more I exposed myself to the fear of DR the less power it actually had over me. The thoughts and feeling got less and less over a period of time, then click my brain just snapped out of it, really as quick as that. Months of terror and in a blink everything went back to normal.


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