# Drugs help/stop symptoms?



## TheNumberG (May 13, 2008)

I believe that I have had DP for years and years going back to a bad childhood event(sexual abuse related)
over the years I also developed anxiety problems and depression

I felt disconnected like maybe reality wasn't real, i was never able to connect with people properly and didn't make a great deal of friends
My friends have come from friends that I already had, like people that I was introduced to from friends
things got gradually worse for me as the time went on and I eventually started drug use

One particular time i took far more of a substance then i should have thinking it was something else
it is believed that the substance was mescaline(thought it was lsd) had a complete out of body experience where I first died, and then lost my sense of self completely, I wasn't even me anymore and I didn't exist but was watching a movie some how as a consciousness in spite of not existing

I went somewhere for a while, it was a crazy journey there but a very nice place when I arrived but thats irrelavent, eventually I went back to watch my body again and I could control it from a distance which felt weird like playing a game
and eventually of course I returned to my body

but the thing is, everything felt so much more real when I came back, I was able to feel emotions more strongly(as opposed to being totally numb most of the time) and my depression was gone, and I felt no anxiety when at rest(I think i still have anxiety a bit though)
I felt more in touch with reality like the symptoms of the DP were lifted slightly

Actually it seems like any time I have a "bad trip" I come back and feel like I am more me then I was before(the worse the experience the better I feel after), and generally the feeling lasts it doesn't just fade or go away, it does diminish a little bit over time, but it never seems to fall back to where it was before the experience(or at least it seems like it) and there is always an improvement

does anyone have a clue what this means? maybe being disconnected like this puts something in perspective for me? or perhaps I just get more vigor for life after thinking I have lost my own, heh

and do people with DP have trouble connecting with people? I have wanted to make friends for a while but its always like another part of me is fighting the urge to be social and meet other people like I am not in total control of myself
A lot of times I can't help but wonder if I am on a show or something and everything thats happening is scripted or just not real in general


----------



## szeret (Aug 7, 2007)

Have you spoken to a DR about your feelings and experiances? If you havent then he/she needs to be your first port of call.

I'd also lay off the LSD. though lysergic acid is compared to other drugs _quite_ safe ( i use the term 'safe' relativly) Hallucinogens can cause extreme, long-lasting adverse neuropsychiatric effects, like flashbacks, relatively long-lasting psychoses, severe depression or shizophrenia-like syndromes. Rapidly changing feelings, depression, anxiety, and distorted perception of time have also all been documented immediately and long after use. U say Bad trips might make you feel normal, but trust me they can also give u anything from post traumatic stress disorder to Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder (HPPD its essentially the dissorder where the trip never ends)

Not to scare u or anything, but things like LSD, MDMA and Ket are so so bad for DP in my experiance.

U sound like youve been though an awful lot.
Have faith though, life can get better/ more manageble.

K.


----------



## hurricane12 (May 22, 2008)

man why would anyone want to take any drugs thats that bad
anyway u shud really lay off the drugs hppd sounds like some scary shit
scarier then dp


----------

