# Waking From The Coma



## Guest (May 4, 2010)

In my own experience of recovery, when I get moments of reality, it's like I'm still 16 years old, the same brain, the same memories. It's like I have been missing for 7 years. It's like waking up from a coma. Can anyone who's experienced full recovery, either verify or deny this? Also if it's true, can you detail if this is a hard thing to awaken to? Suddenly you are back from the dead, and it's like the time you were DP didn't happen? Please help me understand, thanks.


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## imfromtheburgh (Mar 5, 2010)

ThoughtOnFire said:


> In my own experience of recovery, when I get moments of reality, it's like I'm still 16 years old, the same brain, the same memories. It's like I have been missing for 7 years. It's like waking up from a coma. Can anyone who's experienced full recovery, either verify or deny this? Also if it's true, can you detail if this is a hard thing to awaken to? Suddenly you are back from the dead, and it's like the time you were DP didn't happen? Please help me understand, thanks.


with my bit of recovery which i didnt know was recovery until i started to feel like shit again , i could say no but thats only cause i didnt have it for as long as a time. But i guess i still had a good case of d r which really didnt bother me that much i guess most of the dp went away and i was left with d r,so it was kind of like hey i got my sense of self but i still feel a little bit d r.


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## Sarasi3 (Mar 4, 2010)

Hello TOF,

I have had DP for more than 9 years and have not recovered yet, but I think this is still relevant-

I too got DP when I was 16 years old. I think in a way I still feel like I haven't aged inside much, at all really. With my experiences with DP, I find it very hard to concentrate and have a very bad memory also. So, this makes it incredibly difficult for me to progress intellectually and retain any knowledge I try to remember as the years go on. For example, I find it very difficult to read books. I also find having a debate or intelligent conversation with someone a struggle, and even if I manage to learn something, I forget this information quickly. Aside from intelectual development, I feel that DP has stopped me from 'actually experiencing' my life. I feel like I haven't witnessed or been concious or present for the DP years. Can you relate to this? I believe these are the reasons why I still feel the same age as I was when DP struck. So I think I understand why you may feel this way when recovering, therefor it is probably a normal part of recovery.

I can't imagine it being too horrible to awake to this feeling, then again I can't yet relate and don't know what you are experiencing. But I guess you should not be affraid of this feeling. You are getting your life back and thats wonderful regardless! If your mind becomes clear and DP leaves you, It will not take long for you to 'catch up'. And I think it's kind of cool to feel young again. People in their mid 20's start to get a little more serious about life, some get a little too serious. So to feel young and dumb might be quite refreshing?

I want to say thank you for posting what you are experiencing. I feel close to the beginning of recovery, so it's really nice to know what I might experience during recovery- it makes me freak out less; and if I do experience what your'e going through, I will know it is normal. (I will also let you know)

Cheers, MIF


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## Guest (May 4, 2010)

Music is Freedom said:


> Hello TOF,
> 
> I have had DP for more than 9 years and have not recovered yet, but I think this is still relevant-
> 
> ...


Thanks,

I also feel like I'm not experiencing life through these years. I keep remembering the last few years things that have happened (like lose a job) and I'll go whoa! that was X number of years ago! It feels like last month! Also I have a memory gap, or experiencing one while recovering. I also find it hard to read books and hold debates/intellectual conversations. I guess I'll just go with the process of recovery and see where it takes me. Peace.


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## Guest (May 4, 2010)

I'm going to say yes and no the original question. With my first short dp episode, when I was in dp, I couldn't remember anything about my life before dp and when the dp passed, I didn't remember much that happened during that dp period. Fast forward to now and all of those memories out of the first dp period have converted to long term memory. I remember every single day of the first dp period, where, directly after the dp period, I did not remember much at all.

So basically, I am not sure what it is like to recover from long term dp but I do know this, that we dp'ers seem to have short term memory issues but not long term memory issues. You will remember everything that has happened since you got dp. It won't be like waking up from a coma in that sense BUT I am not sure how long it will take for you to remember once the dp leave. Maybe you will immediately have memories of the past couple years but not of the past month or week. I don't know.


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## Guest (May 4, 2010)

tinyfairypeople said:


> I'm going to say yes and no the original question. With my first short dp episode, when I was in dp, I couldn't remember anything about my life before dp and when the dp passed, I didn't remember much that happened during that dp period. Fast forward to now and all of those memories out of the first dp period have converted to long term memory. I remember every single day of the first dp period, where, directly after the dp period, I did not remember much at all.
> 
> So basically, I am not sure what it is like to recover from long term dp but I do know this, that we dp'ers seem to have short term memory issues but not long term memory issues. You will remember everything that has happened since you got dp. It won't be like waking up from a coma in that sense BUT I am not sure how long it will take for you to remember once the dp leave. Maybe you will immediately have memories of the past couple years but not of the past month or week. I don't know.


Wow, okay, thanks for this reply. When I look back at memories that were made while DP, it's the strangest thing, because in the memory it appears that I was not DP. I mean the memory itself is full of life and knowledge of self more than when I was doing that whatever was the memory while being DP.


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## Guest (May 4, 2010)

ThoughtOnFire said:


> Wow, okay, thanks for this reply. When I look back at memories that were made while DP, it's the strangest thing, because in the memory it appears that I was not DP. I mean the memory itself is full of life and knowledge of self more than when I was doing that whatever was the memory while being DP.


It's strange but now that you mention it, my memories of everything that has happened since dp also seem like I didn't have dp at the time that they happened. Hmm maybe there is your solid proof that dp is just a shift in perception in the present moment and not a truth. We are still existing in reality and our memories are the only proof.


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## Guest (May 4, 2010)

tinyfairypeople said:


> It's strange but now that you mention it, my memories of everything that has happened since dp also seem like I didn't have dp at the time that they happened. Hmm maybe there is your solid proof that dp is just a shift in perception in the present moment and not a truth. We are still existing in reality and our memories are the only proof.


Yes, I agree. DP is all about perception...


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## jeffd (Apr 15, 2010)

ThoughtOnFire said:


> Wow, okay, thanks for this reply. When I look back at memories that were made while DP, it's the strangest thing, because in the memory it appears that I was not DP.


same but opposite for me. this is how my memory of life before dp is. my memory is very foggy but i feel like ive had it all my life. like when i remember my childhood i think i had it even then even though i know its only been a lil over a year.


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## dpsince2002 (Oct 26, 2008)

tinyfairypeople said:


> It's strange but now that you mention it, my memories of everything that has happened since dp also seem like I didn't have dp at the time that they happened. Hmm maybe there is your solid proof that dp is just a shift in perception in the present moment and not a truth. We are still existing in reality and our memories are the only proof.


I know what you mean! It's funny, but it seems like I can remember things that have happened during the dp with a lot more clarity than I've had while they were going on. For me, it's also that way with concentrating on and retaining things. I took my Ph.D. exams awhile back, and was absolutely terrified that I wouldn't be able to remember any of the things I'd read for it, because, during reading them, they didn't seem real, and the rumination seemed to go every which way but toward the reading. Then, I took the exam, and all of this info I didn't know I remembered came pouring out, in that funny dp way like a robot was saying it, that wasn't quite me. But I could remember it, and the things I remember from the last 7 years are like someone without dp was experiencing them.


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## CindyinMontana (Nov 10, 2009)

dpsince2002 said:


> I know what you mean! It's funny, but it seems like I can remember things that have happened during the dp with a lot more clarity than I've had while they were going on. For me, it's also that way with concentrating on and retaining things. I took my Ph.D. exams awhile back, and was absolutely terrified that I wouldn't be able to remember any of the things I'd read for it, because, during reading them, they didn't seem real, and the rumination seemed to go every which way but toward the reading. Then, I took the exam, and all of this info I didn't know I remembered came pouring out, in that funny dp way like a robot was saying it, that wasn't quite me. But I could remember it, and the things I remember from the last 7 years are like someone without dp was experiencing them.


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## Mushishi (May 31, 2010)

When I first recovered from DP/DR, it was as if I never had it to begin with. I believe that when you're going through DP/DR, you're operating on completely altered brain functions. Similar to that of a dream, when you awake from it, each second that passes you quickly start forgetting what you dreamed about, even though when you first woke up, you could remember every part of it. The mind, when in normalcy, cannot easily feel the same way when in DP/DR. When I got DP/DR the second time around, I instantly remembered what it was like to be in this coma. It was as if I instantly continued it. You cannot fully compute what it's like to be normal when in DP/DR, and vice versa. This is what I feel.


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## Dyna (May 13, 2010)

Mushishi said:


> When I first recovered from DP/DR, it was as if I never had it to begin with. I believe that when you're going through DP/DR, you're operating on completely altered brain functions. Similar to that of a dream, when you awake from it, each second that passes you quickly start forgetting what you dreamed about, even though when you first woke up, you could remember every part of it. The mind, when in normalcy, cannot easily feel the same way when in DP/DR. When I got DP/DR the second time around, I instantly remembered what it was like to be in this coma. It was as if I instantly continued it. You cannot fully compute what it's like to be normal when in DP/DR, and vice versa. This is what I feel.


How did you recover the first time-Meds? Thanks, Dyna


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## Mushishi (May 31, 2010)

Dyna said:


> How did you recover the first time-Meds? Thanks, Dyna


I'm guessing from the meds. Risperdal. But I'm on them now and I still have DP/DR, and a lot worse than last time, too. The first time I recovered I also was away from work for a week. My work puts me in a lot of stress and am actually going to quit because I believe it's strongly contributing to my DP/DR.


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## Dyna (May 13, 2010)

Mushishi said:


> I'm guessing from the meds. Risperdal. But I'm on them now and I still have DP/DR, and a lot worse than last time, too. The first time I recovered I also was away from work for a week. My work puts me in a lot of stress and am actually going to quit because I believe it's strongly contributing to my DP/DR.


Thanks


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