# new to this forum, need some advice from ex-sufferers



## hello19 (Apr 14, 2008)

Hi!

I am new to this forum, and am desperately looking for advice from ex- DP/DR sufferers, or people who are getting better.

Let me tell you my story. It all started when I was a teenager, sometimes at night I would think about life, space and time, and my mind would start to think of infinity, and all of sudden it is as though it couldn't go any farther.... and I would feel this absolute dread/panic, feeling of nothingness. It would only last a few seconds, and the next day I would be fine.
Fast forward to when I was 24. Once night it happened again but the feeling of dread/nothingness (the *worst* feeling ever) did *not* go away. The next day I starting feeling (what I now know is) DP/DR: like i was looking at life from space, like nothing is real. Absolute horrible horrible feeling. I really felt I was dying. But at the time, I decided not to let myself get drained, and with a combination of techniques : "block the thought technique", distraction, diversion, socializing and patience, I was able to slowly get down to reality. It took me 3 months. I remember the day i "landed" back into reality. It was wonderful: like I was alive again.
Now fastforward 3 years later (the present). A month ago I was sitting watching the tv when all of sudden I felt this utter dread: and had a panic attack. The next day the same thing happened. These two panic attacks didn't lead to DP/DR. but three days later, I was in the movie, and all of a sudden BANG the DP/DR hit real hard, with all the existential angst/emptiness. I was so so sad: i really thought it was gone for good. 
So here I am, one month later, trying to find a solution. In "normal" life, I am very optimistic, fun and outgoing. Now I feel drained, sad, and really terrified. I'm not taking any meds, or seeing any shrinks or anything. I bought the "linden method" which I find helps (although I know he would advice *against* researching/writing in forums........), but I really want some optimistic outlook on existential/life questions for you. How do you deal with this terrible "nothingness" feeling: I though I am falling in a void and never going to get out :-( .
Thank you for your precious help. I am desperate for help
Julie


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## gogu (Jan 15, 2008)

Hi Julie,

I think you have a great asset at your disposal, you recovered from this before. I am not an ex-sufferer(i am struggling with DP/DR for 3 years now) but during all this time I realised there are some things that help, the most important is to stay social, don't isolate yourself, try making new friends and focus on relations. DP/DR can be terrifying and it is indeed a life changing experience, it feeds on your fears, anxiety and all your negative feelings. Try and get all the "good vibes" and it will "starve"(the DP I mean).


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## mickym65 (Mar 17, 2008)

I hope this helps a bit, DP is in most people is caused by excessive anxiety, its almost like a protection for a very tired stressed out mind, in most people this feeling may linger after a tramatic event or a prolonged stressfull period in their life. Some however begin the cycle of holding on to the feeling even after the stress has abated, usually because they find the feeling very disturbing so this in turn generates more unwanted anxiety thus staying in the DP frame of mind.I went through the same as you many years ago trying to fight my way through and sometime ending up feeling worse after experiencing good DP free days, the reason i found was i expected to be cured right now and when i was not i would start the old process of creating more anxiety when i had bad days. I finally found the solution after many years of having episodes of DP on and off, I have now been DP free for 9 years and holding, my answer is as hard as it may sound, give the DP as little thought as you can, show it no respect, dont fight it when it comes but give it space and accept it will pass over time. Hope this helps


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## Cathal_08 (Apr 7, 2008)

gogu said:


> Hi Julie,
> DP/DR can be terrifying and it is indeed a life changing experience, it feeds on your fears, anxiety and all your negative feelings. Try and get all the "good vibes" and it will "starve"(the DP I mean).


i heard thing like that before but now i realise its actually true, of course when people tell you dont tink about, you tink to yourself is of course i dont tink about this its just there!!

try focus on things around you avoidin consontrating on ur thoughts, trey stay positive and after a while you willl notice the DP lifting and you will feel more like yourself!


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## driftwood (Jan 5, 2008)

Hey Julie. I can relate to your sense of dread and gloom, for me it was one of the most intensive and horrifying experiences. to be honest im not quite sure how i got through it. i just ignore it, i dont give it any priority, i dont label it, i dont even think about the word - the last time i joined this forum was almost 6 months ago. if i dont establish this thing as a problem then it has no firm footing to grab me. if i start viewing this from the 'problem->must find solution' perspective it will lead nowhere, its counter-productive and irrevocably leads further deep into the hole of self-absorption. i just let it be. it cant hurt me, only if i let it. i understand it from within a wider, all-embracing context where its all part of the restless flow of life, where nothing is static we keep changing all the time - i just flow with it.. 
bah, im blabbering so ill just leave it at that.

if its any help i found meditation and some aspects of zen buddhism to be really helpful as well as working out and trying to engage with the outside world - a sense of belonging and being a part of something really helps with the healing process i believe

A


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