# Mushrooms



## StandAlone

I'm curious if anyone has taken magic mushrooms with dp.. Did it help or make things worse? I'm considering taking them for multiple reasons, hoping it can open up my mind a bit, help me change my perspective on things. Once/if I recover, I really don't wanna take another drug again so this could be a one and done thing for me. Overall, What was it like?

Any insight would be great!

Andrew


----------



## WILBUR

Eh, hallucinogens are one of those things you should only really take when you feel mentally well.

I wouldn't recommend it.


----------



## StandAlone

I forgot to mention i'm taking a low-medium dose. I don't think its enough to really freak out on.. Have you ever tried them with dp?


----------



## Guest

Mushrooms = Bad idea + mind fuck.

'You can take a horse to water&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;.'


----------



## StandAlone

I'm sorta looking for advice from someone who has done them. I appreciate your input though, I already know its a bad idea.. This is like the one and only time i'm gonna take a serious drug again. I used to take all sorts of drugs before dp, but its basically what got me here. If I ever get better, I'm never gonna risk taking a drug again. So this is sort've like a farewell to drugs, I want one last experience and hopefully its a good one.


----------



## WILBUR

StandAlone said:


> I'm sorta looking for advice from someone who has done them. I appreciate your input though, I already know its a bad idea.. This is like the one and only time i'm gonna take a serious drug again. I used to take all sorts of drugs before dp, but its basically what got me here. If I ever get better, I'm never gonna risk taking a drug again. So this is sort've like a farewell to drugs, I want one last experience and hopefully its a good one.


I've taken a few hallucinogens while DP'd, but I was desperate and really didn't care what happened to me.. As I've said in other threads I'm now on year four of having DP lol... So in the end its up to you, but just imagine panicking while on mushrooms while having DP. I doubt it will actually make you better,even if you dont panic, if anything it will probably make you worse.

Just remember, your brains in a very sensitive state right now, so any little amount of drugs\alterations in your perception can set off a lot of unwanted things.


----------



## Meticulous

Shrooms are what caused my DP.

Not recommended.


----------



## StandAlone

Thanks for the replies, you definitely got me thinking..


----------



## StandAlone

Any other suggestions would be much appreciated!


----------



## numbum

I've done shrooms a few times while having dp, for the same reasons you have. I thought maybe I could have a revelation or something, I was even ready for a bad trip if it would change me for the better. But to tell the truth, it was really underwhelming for me. I think I expected too much from shrooms. I got some cool visuals (trees waving, walls growing and shrinking, etc), but for my mind state not much changed really. I felt a little less anxious, but nothing felt special about it like I had hoped. I've done shrooms maybe 4 times with the same results.


----------



## StandAlone

numbum said:


> I've done shrooms a few times while having dp, for the same reasons you have. I thought maybe I could have a revelation or something, I was even ready for a bad trip if it would change me for the better. But to tell the truth, it was really underwhelming for me. I think I expected too much from shrooms. I got some cool visuals (trees waving, walls growing and shrinking, etc), but for my mind state not much changed really. I felt a little less anxious, but nothing felt special about it like I had hoped. I've done shrooms maybe 4 times with the same results.


Do you think its possible to have a revelation like you stated? I think even if its not likely to help, I'm gonna do it anyway. I need something different in my life, its the same shit everyday. I don't know if you ever have heard of ayahuasca or iboga, supposedly its meant to help people with disorders. Its much more intense though, and probably harder to get.

How many grams did you take when you did it? I've heard its really important to be in a comfortable setting when you take them. Also to be with people your comfortable with. The problem is i'm not totally comfortable with anyone, so i'm gonna take them alone. This is my first time doing it, and i'm doing it alone. Do you think i'll be alright? I'm only taking 2.25 gs


----------



## StandAlone

At first I was looking for that "Magic Pill." Going through this fked up state once, i've came to the conclusion that looking for that "Magic pill/cure" is pointless. The only thing that can help is true effort, will power, overall hard work. I think i'm just looking for something to help me escape this shitty reality temporarily. I've read cases where people found long term relief from taking shrooms though. I'm not expecting much of anything, just hoping it doesn't make things worse. I'm looking for some advice from someone with experience, how should i take them, if i get into a bad trip how do you stay calm, do they make you throw up, i'm taking a dose of 2.25 gs what will the trip be like?

Thanks


----------



## WorkingOnIt

I took mushrooms back in March and had a terrifying panic attack, though the beginning was really a great time. I think people on mushrooms become pretty emotional. If you're looking for something to just give you strange visuals and audibles, I don't think this is necessarily the best. I think many people have a great time on mushrooms, and a lesser population has a truly terrifying time on mushrooms. If you're going to do them, decide whether you would like to have someone available who is sober that can talk you through it if you're going on a bad path.

Ultimately realize that it can be a risk. Make sure that you're conscious ahead of time about how much your perception can change including visual, audible, tactile, and even abstract perception such as time, how you feel about yourself, spatial perception. So much of our human experience is unconscious to us, and that's what mushrooms tends to affect in my experience.

Overall I suggest not to do it, but if you do ... keep a positive mind, and don't go in with strong expectations. Be prepared to feel changes in perception that you didn't know were possible.


----------



## Conrad Nenad

mushrooms are one of the few things that has really helped me. low doses only. and is more effective in situations that are already conducive to reconnecting with reality, e.g. out in nature, socialising / being with friendly people in a safe environment, maybe after a couple of beers or on a night out if you drink just to loosen things up. the key is low doses, you don't want to be 'tripping' or hallucinating at all really as this could potentially make things worse in some situations.

obviously this might not be the same for everyone, but this has really helped me in a lot of ways, and there are many studies and evidence from neuroscience that show that psilocybin is affective at treating depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD etc, as well as triggering neurogenesis (creating new cells and pathways in the brain) . from my personal experience i would defiantly recommend mushrooms for dp/dr, just only take very small amounts and see how you feel, if it helps maybe take slightly more.


----------



## eddy1886

Mushrooms will make you hallucinate....They will also amplify your mood....If for instance you go into it nervously or anxiously it will take that mood and multiply it ten fold (Hence people who describe bad trips)

In my opinion you are playing Russian Roulette especially as you are already a DP sufferer and as a result a naturally anxious person....Mushroom trips last for multiple hours (8, 10, 12) and if you start to trip bad you will be stuck like that (Its not a nice experience trust me) You will be running to the emergency room looking for help....

My opinion! Stay away from all illegal drugs and give your mind the proper opportunity it needs to try and recover from DP......Dont throw more fuel on the already raging fire that is DP...


----------



## damagedjones

I have done shrooms while dp and depression medium dose, had some visuals and for me it was good feeling for two weeks cuz i realized some things about my life during the trip..lsd is worse.. remeber psychedelics are personal and i know what i do. For me the trips have been like self theraphy


----------



## Dp123

You can't really want to do something like that to yourself surely. I've got no experience of anything like that but I really can't imagine that doing some kind of psychedelic drug while suffering from such a major problem already would be a good idea. You might go totally over the edge or something. I really wouldn't do that.


----------



## vanuti vetru

Conrad Nenad said:


> mushrooms are one of the few things that has really helped me. low doses only. and is more effective in situations that are already conducive to reconnecting with reality, e.g. out in nature, socialising / being with friendly people in a safe environment, maybe after a couple of beers or on a night out if you drink just to loosen things up. the key is low doses, you don't want to be 'tripping' or hallucinating at all really as this could potentially make things worse in some situations.
> 
> obviously this might not be the same for everyone, but this has really helped me in a lot of ways, and there are many studies and evidence from neuroscience that show that psilocybin is affective at treating depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD etc, as well as triggering neurogenesis (creating new cells and pathways in the brain) . from my personal experience i would defiantly recommend mushrooms for dp/dr, just only take very small amounts and see how you feel, if it helps maybe take slightly more.


Can you describe what are your symptoms exactly and how mushrooms have alleviated them?


----------



## Conrad Nenad

eddy1886, i understand your concern but i am suggesting sub-hallucinogenic doses which will not produce many of the negative affects you describe, for example, you won't hallucinate, you won't be tripping for 9 hours etc.. what I'm suggesting really doesn't need to be seen as scary or dangerous just because the same substance at much higher doses could be. its like the difference of having a half pint of beer or a half bottle of vodka, after a harf pint of beer you are still in control, could still drive safely, a half bottle of vodka and you could end up in A&E 



vanuti vetru said:


> Can you describe what are your symptoms exactly and how mushrooms have alleviated them?


yes of course, sorry for late reply.. I've had all manner of symptoms of DP, DR, PTSD, so to save time i will take the list from the pinned thread 'the holy grail of curing dp/dr' and add a quick explanation of how mushrooms have or haven't helped me with each part.

*1) Acceptance*

this is something that psilocybin is brilliant for, there are many examples of its use with terminally ill patients were it allows them to accept that they have a terminal condition, accept it in a way that allows them to be much happier in there last moths or years.. i personally had an experience were i was able to connect with a deep part of my real self and have a dialogue were part of me spoke and said something to the affect of "its ok, you've got these problems that are troubling you at the moment, but its ok, now lets deal with them"

*2) Letting go / **3) Distraction / **4) Tuning focus back on external world(reality) and interact with it*

this is very similar to the above, it just brings clarity and calmness, puts you back in control of your thoughts, stopping the intruding, relentless bullshit that plagued my mind. when a irrational DP/DR thought would come into my head i would be able to look at it for what it is and so instantly dismiss it and move on to something real. so it allowed me to really live in the moment, to start focusing outward. far from being hallucinogenic it actually allowed me to see the world again how it really is. it allowed me to reconnect with my body, to be able to look at my are and *see* that its alive, and part of me. hard to explain but its almost like feeling like an animal, that feeling of being a living thing. and the same goes for recognising other things as alive, people, animals, plants, its suddenly obvious that they are living, breathing things with energy and personality.

*5) Socializing*

mushrooms have helped me massively with socialising, the psilocybin decreases the activity in the part of the brain that is over active in depression and anxiety, so that alone helps by making you feel good and happy, this, along with the way they let you see someone as a real living animal with a mind and a personality means that socialising become much more instinctive, natural and obvious, as well as much more satisfying.

*6) Facing your fears&burried surrows*

again psilocybin is brilliant at being able to look back at experiences that have a lot of strong negative emotion tied up with them, it allows you to look at them but without the overwhelming emotion, so you can think about traumatic experiences and see them for what they are. this allows you to take a more adult view of past troubles and allows you to move on having 'opened the box and seeing that its empty'

*7) Eating right / **Sleeping/Exercising*

doesn't particularly help here but it did let me feel that i wanted to look after myself mentally and physically.. it definitely helped with smoking for me as it let me see it for what it really is, almost like mindful smoking it let me realise that smoking actually taste like shit, and i didnt like the way it stopped me breathing oxogen, sounds stupid but its true, most smokers are blind to both of these, not because they're arent happening but because they arent smoking mindfully, just out off habit.

*  *

*9) Changing your thinking pattern /**10) Re-enter reality & Never looking back*

again something they can really help with, they temporary active many parts of the brain allowing for new pathways to be formed from previously unconnected areas.. heres an article with info and pictures to explain more http://www.wired.com/2014/10/magic-mushroom-brain/ there are many cases of people being cured of problems instantly, especialy with things like ocd, phobias etc .. or even things like stutters, paul stamens who had a terrible stutter for most of his youth before being cured of it completely from one dose (all be it a big one) of mushrooms is a good example of this. so it allows you to make new thinking patterns that stick only very quickly. also DP/DR is for the most part a problem with pathways being inhibited, mushrooms can allow those pathways to be re-activated meaning things can suddenly come back to you .. an example from the 'holy grail' thread :

- Now taking something as simple as playing cards means this for you: "moving your hands and picking up some cards with symbols on it and try to get certain cards to win".

Thats your DPDR'ed non meaningful dereality, when your emotions come back it's a GAME again, a game that the purpose is to WIN, and the winning gives you a feeling of luck, happiness and achievement. -

this is the kind of stuff that your brain is still perfectly capable of its just inhibiting it for 'protection' so these things can come back instantly if the right changes happen in your brain.

sorry if I've made little sense in parts of that or if spelling, gramma etc are bad, I'm just in a rush, i have probably missed things and not gone into as much detail as i should have in places but hopefully that gives you the rough gist of it.

any questions feel free to ask, although it will likely be a while before i reply.

and just to reiterate .. this is from my experience, it won't necessarily have the same affect for everyone, and i can't stress enough to only start with very very small doses, lits hard to put a figure on it because mushroom potency can vary but i would litteraly just start with the smallest nibble and see if you notice anything at all, if not then next time have a slightly bigger nibble etc.. also i would say that perhaps people who have never experimented with any kind of mid altering substance before and who are about neverous about trying it because of their preconceived ideas of mushrooms making you 'trip' etc should take extra care to start on tiny doses and work their way up so they can get a feel for it, get used to it etc as its obviously very important that you feel safe in what you are doing.

remember people tiny tiny amounts


----------



## Universe???

I know this is real old but... Hahahahahahaha that's insane..shrooms will make your Dp much more intense... I used to take shrooms to purposely make my Dp/dr stonger with very great success


----------



## TDX

> I used to take shrooms to purposely make my Dp/dr stonger with very great success


Why???


----------



## thy

TDX, hows lamotrigine, anything? Im starting to get some facial twitches which I am finding kind of weird. I quite like it otherwise. Starting to feel very very subtle improvements, vision seems slightly clearer, but I'm still heavily DP'd. Sorry this pretty off topic for this thread haha.


----------



## TDX

> TDX, hows lamotrigine, anything?


I'm at 125 mg/day: 75 mg in the morning and 50 mg in the evening. I suspect that, along with the absence of Clozapine and Mirtazapine, it might cause my problems to sleep. This is quite distressing, but I realize that I have to hang in there. I didn't notice any improvement.



> Im starting to get some facial twitches which I am finding kind of weird.


Lamotrigine seems to be full of surprises.



> Starting to feel very very subtle improvements, vision seems slightly clearer, but I'm still heavily DP'd.


This might become even better if you increase your dosage. Maybe you are in the lucky 36%.


----------



## thy

TDX said:


> I'm at 125 mg/day: 75 mg in the morning and 50 mg in the evening. I suspect that, along with the absence of Clozapine and Mirtazapine, it might cause my problems to sleep. This is quite distressing, but I realize that I have to hang in there. I didn't notice any improvement.


Fingers crossed something clicks soon. Still have the option of adding an SSRI.


----------



## Universe???

Why?? Because when my deprestion and anxiety is at its worst feeling Dp is an escape from terrible emotions.. The extreamly numb feeling and leaving my body feeling from Dp helps me escape from very bad feelings of deprestion and anxiety even more than heroin did


----------



## Conrad Nenad

Universe??? said:


> I know this is real old but... Hahahahahahaha that's insane..shrooms will make your Dp much more intense... I used to take shrooms to purposely make my Dp/dr stonger with very great success


im guessing that if your intention was to make things worse then you where taking more recreational sized doses? and also with the goal in mind of having an unhelpful /unpleasant experience ?


----------



## Universe???

Yes very large doses and " unpleasant unhelpful" ???? I said make my Dp stronger not worse Lol why would I do shrooms if I wanted to have an un helpful unpleasant experience..


----------



## Guest

Universe??? said:


> Why?? Because when my deprestion and anxiety is at its worst feeling Dp is an escape from terrible emotions.. The extreamly numb feeling and leaving my body feeling from Dp helps me escape from very bad feelings of deprestion and anxiety even more than heroin did


you do know its possible to feel better without drugging yourself or making your DP worse, right?


----------



## Universe???

Not in my life .my 50 year old mom has been severely depressed her whole life and has tried everything... My genes are fucked


----------



## Conrad Nenad

universe??? do you understand that taking small doses will have a much different affect than taking large or very large doses?

also i think i might have misinterpreted your initial post slightly, personally i don't make such a distinction between the words stronger and worse in regards to my dp, for me if its stronger then i would say its worse.


----------



## Universe???

I micro dose all the time in my experience it always makes the DP more intense and I can't see how any amount would lessen the symptoms ... There is not that big of a difference between small and large doses except large doses u obviously are gonna trip way harder. and the "stronger , worse".. Ya where different lol


----------



## The3lbDream

Ok this is just my experience with mushrooms but I wouldn't recommend them to anyone period.I took them like four times and was in DR before thyroid.The first experience was amazing.It was a little over a gram and everything felt right.Dudnt help not one bit with DR however and didn't make it worse.The second and third trips were horrible...I'm mean horrible but again didn't make it better or worse.Ok now here's were I seriously hate myself...I began to see recovery...I met someone and fell in love.I got primoted at work.My DR never went away but honestly it was to the point where I could LIVE. With it.Everything seemed fine.Then I got talked into doing shrooms again..didn't want too really and only ate over a gram.Didnt really trip at all but the next day...everything was 10 times worse and felt like I was seriously shorting out.To be blunt the decision changed my life...lost my girl because of it and can barley do my job.That being said I've seen the light and know it's still there..I've been trying to eat better and been doing this nutrition program called Thrive.Thrive helped me level out..now I'm not saying it'll help any of you but it did me.I use the black patches and it's expensive..long story short guys please don't do shrooms..please.I hate myself for it.It set me way back


----------



## Chelsea

I took 2.5 g of shrooms while battling anxiety and DP. At the time, prior to taking them, I was really into reading about spiritual enlightenment, "The Power of Now" and everything else that had to do with spiritual growth. Even though I've read a lot, I still felt like I understand it all, but cannot completely comprehend what I learnt. I felt like I was at the last step of some journey and the solution was there ahead of me, just a little bit out of my reach - so I needed a push. Having read a lot about shrooms, and their power to heal people, both physically and mentally, and having my boyfriend idolize them exactly for this reason, I was determined to try them.

*The trip*: My boyfriend and I split the 5 grams fairly equally, he might have gotten a little bit of a bigger portion, but not significantly, my dose was still above 2 grams. It was around 9 p.m. and we ate them, and we were at my place playing Monopoly and listening to music, so that we keep engaged and not wait for it to kick in. I was positively anxious during the whole time, waiting to see what will happen. The first thing that started happening was that my body started to get more relaxed, and the music kind of made my arms dance. I didn't want to keep still. Then the hallucinations kicked in. Everything was kind of moving, and I saw my boyfriend at the back of the room, but it seemed like there was this veil between us, like a visible translucent veil that divided dimensions. It seemed to me like I would enter another dimension if I would walk through that veil. This didn't freak me out though. I soon started feeling like nothing made sense any more, but not in a depressing kind of way, for example I looked at the door and kept thinking how the door make no sense, same with the window, and especially my phone. I started thinking that what if I called my parents now, but then again the phone makes no sense, so why would I do that? Everything lost meaning but in a way which I never felt before or after the trip. I touched my dog and it seemed like he was made out of rubber, like when I pressed onto him it seemed like he was made out of slime or something. I didn't want to hurt him so I kind of stayed away from him. Then I went to the balcony, and when I looked outside it was overwhelming. I actually said: "There is so much outside!", as though I forgot about everything that exists outside and saw it for the first time. The thought of anyone seeing or speaking to me kind of freaking me out, so I stayed away from the balcony and went back to the sofa.

That's when I started freaking out. The thing is, I was kind of losing touch with myself, in a way that I was looking at something, or thinking something and lost track of it and then kind of came back. It was like I kept disappearing for split seconds, and it was like I was talking to myself, but probably the ego speaking saying- why would you ever eat shrooms and put yourself through this? Then I started having a panic attack and started shaking uncontrollably. I went to sit in the tub in warm water, with my clothes on, because it somehow didn't make sense why I would need to be naked to take a bath. I also took 2 or 5 mg of Valium, which I prepared beforehand in case of a bad trip. I soon calmed down, and the shrooms were weening of a little, it was past midnight and I was finaly able to lay down and enjoy everything.

I started thinking about my anxiety and saw it as this black chest box inside my chest that had these chains and a lock over it. I started imagining that I was hitting it in order to release it, but the more I hit, the more of the chains started growing. It was then I realized that you can't fight anxiety, you have to make friends with it. The more you fight, the stronger it gets.

*The day after the trip: *

I woke up feeling fairly anxious, as usual, and it was all good, until my boyfriend said he's going out to play soccer. Then, the panic attack set in. I started thinking he can't leave me alone, how will I handle everything on my own, we just ate shrooms yesterday, I can't be alone etc. I started making drama and freaking out, crying uncontrollably and then it was like I had a revelation, like the shrooms, or whoever put that thought in my head said: "You don't have to feel like this. You can always choose how you are going to feel.", and I was like "Whoa", and I remember telling my boyfriend that I don't have to feel like this, and he was like what? And I just calmed down completely and told him he can go play soccer.

*The enlightenment:*

So after that little being able to choose how you feel revelation, everything was OK, I was still pretty anxious but able to control myself, until my boyfriend informed that he's going on a vacation with his friends to this party beach for 8 days. It was maybe a week or two after the trip. I started panicking again, crying, making drama and all that. He left nonetheless. The next few days, I was waking up with immense nervousness in my stomach, unable to eat, be alone at home, or hearing my boyfriend's voice or seeing his picture. All thoughts of him made my anxiety 10 times worse. I think it was the second day after he left that I went to see my parents where I got a panic attack. I started freaking out in front of them about how I don't know what his doing there and how I'm feeling this nervousness in my stomach and I don't know what to do etc. My mom is a doctor, but my parents didn't how to react, they didn't really freak out but I could sense they got a little scared. I kept thinking that I am going to tell them that I ate shrooms, if I stay there, so I put myself together and said I'm going home to take a bath. When i got home and was all alone again, the panic attack got 10 times worse. I kept thinking that I am going crazy and that I should call the emergency come and take me to the looney. Luckily, there was this friend online on Facebook, who was also into reading about spiritual enlightenment and was battling anxiety and DP at the time, so I told him that I'm having a panic attack and that I can't take it anymore, and he just said: "Listen, you are going to lie down on your couch, and I am going to lie down as well. You are going to play this song and just close your eyes and let all of the thoughts come at you, but don't react to it." He sent me this 7 chakras healing meditation song on Youtube, and I meditated with him on Facebook for 10 minutes or so. And the panic attack passed. I got so much more interested into meditation and the ability to feel my Self and being to control this irrational behavior of mine by concentrating on the Self.

This was like a prelude to what happened the next day. I woke up with the same nervousness again, and then I read this thing about fear and anxiety written by some guy on some discussion board, where he basically said that you can't hide forever and spend your life hiding from everything and everyone, and that it's just anxiety, no matter how bad it hits you, nothing will ever happen. And that struck me so bad, it was like the last push that I needed (all prior things pushing me as well), and I suddenly felt freedom, love, and just peace all over. There was not one percent of anxiety left. I felt so incredibly happy about every thing, about life, and all of the possibilities that it has to offer. I suddenly wanted to do everything and felt like there are no obstacles now, like whatever I would want to do, I could do it. The negative thoughts just vanished completely. I started enjoying the little things, like even being by myself and watching whatever crap was on TV, I could sincerely enjoy the experience. Same with meeting with friends, there was not one struck of anxiety there. I started meditating daily and started jogging. I remember one night I was jogging and I suddenly felt this incredible connection to the universe, it was like the black chest box in my chest finaly opened and it was now struck with this beam of light that was rising from my chest to the sky and I felt incredible happiness and freedom. I was also free of all resentment I ever had, and had a deeper understanding for everything going on. After this, I did not speak or think of anxiety for a long, long time, perhaps a year. I saw anxiety as such as an illusion that was not even worth talking about, as it doesn't really exist.

There were definately times when I felt anxious around new people, or starting new school year, but I didn't let it get me. I just witnessed it and it passed too soon to even reflect on it.

*The point of the story and about the shrooms:*

The thing about mushrooms is that you have to have respect for them. They are not a drug that you take to have fun at a party. They are a tool that will take you on a trip that you need at the time, and will chew you up and spit you out if you resist it. You need to be prepared to surrender and feel whatever comes at you. You need to be able to handle panic attacks and know what you want to get out of the trip. Have no expectations what so ever, because they will do whatever they have to to get you to where you need to be. So, do not resist. Also, if you should take them, they will sort of assemble everything to happen so that you do take them. There is an incredible power inside them that expands your perceptions and abilities to understand not only life, but yourself. It will probably not happen immediately, but once you do take them, everything will unfold very soon and very gradually. You may not even notice it. But with shrooms it's like someone puts new perspectives in that life of yours you are living inside your head. You get access to new thoughts and ideas that you did not have beforehand. I wouldn't say that people with mental disorders shouldn't take shrooms. I'd say that anyone who is not ready to face their fears, learn about new realities, and is unwilling to grow- shouldn't eat them. However, if you are want to grow, and are ready to face whatever demons you have inside yourself, welcome them, and change your life, then do take them. Just remember to respect the trip and know that every thing is right just the way it is, because the universe wouldn't take you any where you shouldn't supposed to be, just don't listen to your mind. The mind is the one that is afraid, but there's no point in being afraid. Why would you spend your whole life shaking and hiding when there is so much beauty outside.

I feel like you will get to wherever you are supposed to get, when you are supposed to. You can't rush any where. You can meditate for 20 hours in a day but if you are not yet ready for the enlightenment, you will not get there. You cannot seek or chase anything, because it only gets further away. You need to relax, surrender and believe that the universe has your best intentions in mind, because it does.


----------



## luctor et emergo

Chelsea said:


> *The trip*:
> 
> *The day after the trip: *
> 
> *The enlightenment:*
> 
> *The point of the story and about the shrooms:*


Great story and I'm glad it somewhat worked for you.

My experience was horrific, with an amount of terrible anxiety that luckily "only" lasted about 10 hours.

I was 17 and stupid enough to smoke weed beforehand, this could have been my trigger to dpd, drd.


----------

